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Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] Someone clarify this. which of the TT uses quotas for race and religion to fill a class TIA 33 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 07.14.08, 01:04 PM Flag
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Brearley mom said they do that. But I don't think that's true. School denied it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:05 PM Flag
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Brearley mom? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:07 PM Flag
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Fine. Mom whose dd goes to B. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:10 PM Flag
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Yikes sorry, hit a nerve? Just asking what brearley mom was [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:11 PM Flag
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what nerve? are you new here? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:12 PM Flag
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HUH? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:14 PM Flag
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Brearley mom? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:09 PM Flag
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lol schools deny a lot of things. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:09 PM Flag
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I think they deny for accuracy in this case because Brearley is not very diverse at all. Racially. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:11 PM Flag
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lol you are funny [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:12 PM Flag
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Oh? It's a sea of white faces. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:14 PM Flag
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besides, school said they don't look at race or religion at all. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:15 PM Flag
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now THAT is funny [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:15 PM Flag
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that's what they said. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:18 PM Flag
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Is that what you saw on your TOUR [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:15 PM Flag
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Oh, do they hide the darkies? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:16 PM Flag
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Yes, they do. Each class will have 25 to 30% jewish and then hispanic and african american in decent numbers with economic mixes and variations [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:10 PM Flag
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I spit out my coffee through my nostrils. What? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:13 PM Flag
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lol. that is total bs [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:14 PM Flag
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i know it. Math is all wrong, too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:16 PM Flag
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is that what you saw on your tour? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:16 PM Flag
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yes, but I saw 6 classes in the lower school and 4 in the upper. plus, I have friends whose dd's go there. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:22 PM Flag
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LOLOLOL [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:39 PM Flag
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yes when they actually allow you inside you get to see what the school is really like. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:16 PM Flag
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hmmm... I am not White and would love to have a tour of the "diverse" side of the school... do you think they'll arrange that for me? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:17 PM Flag
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Come to think of it, I did see 2 black girls who weren't socializing with the other girls. in the HS classes. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:19 PM Flag
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hmm... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:20 PM Flag
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Maybe they were the white girls' maids? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:20 PM Flag
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well, it broke my heart. then again, social interaction is not their strength. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:23 PM Flag
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the school's strength, i mean. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:24 PM Flag
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no TT or any school for that matter will admit to quotas [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:16 PM Flag
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but they do it [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:16 PM Flag
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of course, but how could op's question be answered definitively? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:17 PM Flag
[ - ] Got ERB back. 98 (97 verbal and 99 in performance). coding wasn't very good, btw. Is this good enough for Dalton? Do they care about coding? 32 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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NY Schools 07.14.08, 12:59 PM Flag
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do you have a ds? I expect my ds to bomb coding as well. My understanding is that schools don't care that much about it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:02 PM Flag
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yes,ds [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:03 PM Flag
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your ds definitely has a shop with that score, although not a shoo-in. But then no one is a shoo in these days. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:14 PM Flag
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^^^ shot, not a shop [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:16 PM Flag
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:) a shop would be nice, too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:17 PM Flag
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Yes, anything 95+ is - GL [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:18 PM Flag
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OH GEEZ, I hate the "is Muffy's high 90s score good enough for our favorite school which we haven't toured or interviewd at." I bet you were one of those people in high school and college who used to think they were failing an exam and then got an A. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:24 PM Flag
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thanks for reminding me of those people. I hated them. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:26 PM Flag
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Why, btw? It's usually A students who fret anyway. Kids who should fret don't. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:27 PM Flag
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OR: why? I was top of my class and the fretters were just annoying and insecure. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:28 PM Flag
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Well, I fret and I was also top of my class. Not sure why it should annoy you, though. Better than cocky. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:31 PM Flag
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because aome one who thinks they fail a test (when they subsequently get an A) is like having a mosquito buzzing around [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:39 PM Flag
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why? btw, I don't fret about failing a test but getting a B (which I don't want) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:41 PM Flag
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Hey, competition is fierce. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:26 PM Flag
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yeah, but no one here can actually answer your question and what does the question "mean": "good enough"? just silly. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:28 PM Flag
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what question? I'm not op. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:31 PM Flag
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VBA - congrats though ;-) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:31 PM Flag
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First of all, great score. Second of all, coding doesn't matter unless DC has fine motor issues, which do matter. Third, these questions about "good enough for X school" are stupid. The ERB is one piece of the puzzle. For some kids, a 93 is good enough for Dalton; for others (including mine, who goes to a TT SS but garnered no interest from Dalton), a 99x3 won't be. Fourth, a 98 (or any other score over 95) will be good enough to satisfy any school on the ERB front; a 99 will get a kid a closer look. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:55 PM Flag
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There ARE schools for which a 95 is NOT high enough for an unconnected applicant. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 04:26 PM Flag
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Spence and HM, maybe, and that is it. I know unconnected kids who got into B, C and D with mid-90s scores. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 06:34 AM Flag
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I don't know about HM because we didn't apply, but that is not true at Spence [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 06:39 AM Flag
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If your kid got into Spence with a 95, she's lucky. Most girls there have high 90s. Most score conscious of the ss schools. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 06:48 AM Flag
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Not trying to be snarky, but how do we know this? It's kind of like the "basement" interview with Dalton - you hear it on UB all the time, but it just doesn't seem to make sense IRL. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 06:51 AM Flag
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My ds got 99 percentiles in all parts. Wasn't good enough for Dalton. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:56 PM Flag
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Dalton didn't want your DC. It had nothing to do with the score. I mean that in the nicest possible way - we had the same experience. I think people get way too hung up on ERBs. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 02:03 PM Flag
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I didn't take it in a bad way at all. I agree with you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 02:03 PM Flag
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Dalton, more than most places, seemed to want what they wanted, without regard to score. I felt like DC got a close look everywhere we applied except there - something about our application (possibly the summer bday) just turned them off. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 02:06 PM Flag
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And I know dc with 95s who got in, there are other factors, the parents, the type of learner - maybe they have many applying with one style & can only take so many . .. In the end, it is an imperfect numbers game [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 06:40 AM Flag
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I think it's a fair question and not a VBA if you are new to this game. All I have is my own child's experience - but he had a 99V/P but a 75 on coding subtest and not much in the way of explaination in the report. Narrative said pencil grip, etc was very good (no problems identified). PSD said descriptive words would have been better than "very good" if coding score had been higher (like excellent, superb, note worthy). Anyway, he got in Dalton and HM. No one besides my own PSD mentioned the coding score ever. Have also heard through the grapevine than CGPS supposedly does not put much weight into coding score. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 03:16 PM Flag
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My kid had a grip that alternated between tripod and fist and got low 90s in coding. Remarks about exceptional speed and accuracy. Got 99x3 overall (coding by far lowest score--as it is for most kids). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 04:29 PM Flag
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coding it not important as long as everything else is good. Dc got into Dalton with a very low coding score but a very high overall score. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 04:54 PM Flag
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DS got 99 ERB overall (coding was in the 60s) and got into Dalton. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 06:53 AM Flag
[ - ] Who usually pays closing costs on ahouse, buyer or seller? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Toddler 07.14.08, 12:58 PM Flag
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depends on the costs. as evidence of the fact that i have been on here too long today, here is a link someone posted re a post re transfer taxes. i think this is the norm in nyc, though. http://www.prudentialelliman.com/MainSite/Guide/NYCClosingCosts.aspx [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:01 PM Flag
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the buyer [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:11 PM Flag
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Good point. Fondly, S. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:26 PM Flag
[ - ] what school districts in manhattan have the best options for middle school. i'm just beginning my research and need a place to start. thanks!! 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:58 PM Flag
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D2 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:01 PM Flag
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are they zoned or you apply and get priority for being in the district? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:22 PM Flag
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More than priority: most District 2 middle schools limit admissions to kids graduating from District 2 schools. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 06:42 PM Flag
[ - ] dh is up for partner at his firm, but his most recent criticism during his review was that he needs to 'close the loop' on his projects. ever since he told me this, i notice it EVERYWHERE in his life! it totally dilutes the good work he does! for example: will hang a picture but leave the hammer sitting out; will make a great bbq but leaves the tools outside and grill not covered; will make me a drink but leave the bottle on the counter. it's making me crazy and I want to tell him but I'm afraid he'll get defensive. but honestly, i'm afraid it's going to seriously hinder his career if this is the type of s**t he's pulling on the job. Thoughts?? 24 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:57 PM Flag
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i think that you are overreacting and that this is a great way to get into a fight about a bottle on the counter. seriously, i would not equate the two. not in the least. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:00 PM Flag
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i think it sounds like he has mild ADD [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:01 PM Flag
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not sure that it's add---more like the lazy gene from his sorry-ass family. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:02 PM Flag
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np - wow, even more issues coming out.... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:05 PM Flag
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oh puh-leze, his family will always be an issue. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:05 PM Flag
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perhaps, but the problem is that you inject it into unrelated issues. i doubt his "sorry-ass family" has anything to do with his recent review or partnership prospects. grow up. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:07 PM Flag
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np - ita. op sounds dreadful. her dh should leave her and be happy with his life in a way she'll never allow him to be [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:11 PM Flag
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well, so he is a slob. What does that have to do with him closing the loop professionally? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:02 PM Flag
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I can just picture him doing a great job on something, and then he doesn't send that summary email, or make that follow-up phone call, or schedule a meeting. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:03 PM Flag
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that's quite a jump. Apples and oranges. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:06 PM Flag
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My dh does all of the things you mention and more but is not like this at work. I'm not sure the two are connected. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:03 PM Flag
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really? that makes me feel slightly better... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:04 PM Flag
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Same with my dh. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:14 PM Flag
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ditto. I thought all men were like this, actually. I think dh used to be like this professionally, but got called on it and fixed the problem. Unfortunately, still like this at home. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:28 PM Flag
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maybe he's used to people cleaning up after him [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:05 PM Flag
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I thought of this too. I've made a conscious decision NOT to pick anything up. I wonder if maybe some of his staff might be doing the same??? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:06 PM Flag
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you sure are projecting a lot of your own s**t onto his office relationships! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:07 PM Flag
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that was my thought. At home OP seems to be cleaning up after him. I don't know how this can compare to what he's doing on the job. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:07 PM Flag
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you're dangerously close to piling on here at a very tense moment in your husband's life. Do not interpret his review at work as an invitation to point out his flaws and then, btw, if you don't listen to us, you'll never make partner and we'll be poor forever and all those years you spent working your butt off at the firm will be wasted. Don't go there. Do the opposite. Cheer him on and make him feel good as he heads into the final lap of this important career milestone. If you don't support him unequivocally, he will feel doubly let down. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:06 PM Flag
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valid point... thx. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:08 PM Flag
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ITA - be supportive now or you will regret it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:14 PM Flag
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you sound awful. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:07 PM Flag
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Only few become partner. Looks like your DH will miss the boat. So close! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:08 PM Flag
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mean and not funny at all. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:11 PM Flag
[ - ] Really struggling. I have one sibling who has been, for the last 5 or so years, just a total disappointment in terms of being part of our family. We both have spouses, kids, etc, but sib lives far away and always puts her family first in spite of the fact that one of our parents died recently and the other is now alone. There's always a reason why everything is someone else's fault, why sib has to come first, etc. I am trying to figure out how to accept this, move on, and also not feel like I have to live my life according to what our remaining parent needs. Anyone btdt? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Toddler 07.14.08, 12:54 PM Flag
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sibling obviously is using emotional distance and conflict to distance herself from the pain s/he feels from parent's death and to protect self from expected pain that will result from other parent's death. sib's choice bothers you because it's the one you aren't taking. do you wish you had? are you envious? i would focus on your own healing, recognize there's no perfect answer and that you will sometimes have to deny your parent what s/he wants to get what you want. any particular reason the post is in neutral pronouns? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:04 PM Flag
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a mary and martha problem [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:26 PM Flag
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it sounds like you envy/resent her distance. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:28 PM Flag
[ - ] Can someone tell me about Riverdale Country School? Thanks. 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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NY Schools 07.14.08, 12:53 PM Flag
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progressive in the lower school and they buckle up for MS/HS. Good school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:55 PM Flag
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buckle down? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:03 PM Flag
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down. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:08 PM Flag
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we visited it last fall and loved it. Probably wouldn't describe LS as progressive though - pretty traditional. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 03:18 PM Flag
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you need a bus to get there and a scrunchy to get in [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:58 PM Flag
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Is "scrunchy" a euphemism for something? Enlighten me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:04 PM Flag
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poster is saying in a prejudice way that the school is very jewish. a scrunch is an oversized hairband used by people with frizzy hair as a ponytail holder. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 03:49 PM Flag
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You are ridiculous. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 04:30 PM Flag
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fwiw, i don't have frizzy hair and use a scrunchy at night. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 09:55 AM Flag
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It's a traditional co-ed school in Riverdale. Competitive atmosphere, big on piling on the HW, good sports teams. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:41 PM Flag
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Would not be for us. Have you looked at Friend's Seminary, Little Red School House, St. Ann's, Brooklyn Friend's. These are wonderful schools that will respect your child's autonomy...teaching learning skills and not with drills. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 03:32 PM Flag
[ - ] Any tips/food suggestions for new atkins convert? Besides meat. 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 07.14.08, 12:53 PM Flag
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any kind of fish, tofu, shiritaki noodles (great pasta substitute), eggs, low carb bread, nuts, strawberries, broccoli, eggplant, lots of salads, etc [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:56 PM Flag
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I liked turkey meatballs but I used some ground Almonds in them instead of breadcrumbs so they weren't like lead balls... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:57 PM Flag
[ - ] Who do I talk to at the DOE to find this out? We may be going abroad for a year starting this winter. DC soon to start K at NEST--will they hold the spot? How can we apply for younger DC if we are overseas? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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NY Schools 07.14.08, 12:51 PM Flag
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not likely [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:52 PM Flag
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no, and you can't. must have an address in NYC to apply for citywides. spots are not held open, but you are welcome to reapply [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:05 PM Flag
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I doubt they'd hold the spot, but maybe you'd have preference if a spot was open upon your return? Just guessing. I have no idea. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:10 PM Flag
[ - ] Okay - what do you all think of the New Yorker cover of the Obamas? Usually, the New Yorker has perfect pitch - but here I think they were off. I get "the joke". It's just not funny and not well-timed. 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:49 PM Flag
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I agree. I understand that it's sarcasm, but the reality is that the cover will be displayed at every newsstand, but many people do not read the New Yorker and so will be left with a serious misimpression. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:53 PM Flag
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I think they were trying to have the balls (there's that word again) to do something different, i.e., to attack the problem in a way that shows they are not scared of using caricature. Unfortunately, it did more than come off wrong, it was wrong. If you're going to do something like that, the message has to be so unambiguous, so unmistakenly clear that no one could infer a different message. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:54 PM Flag
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NYer cartoons are frequently unfunny. This one was a real doozy, though. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:55 PM Flag
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this was worse than unfunny. this was stupid, inflammatory, offensive and very poorly timed particularly since dems are having such a difficult time convincing little old ladies in Florida that Obama is not muslim and trying to counteract email campaigns. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:00 PM Flag
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Any publicity is good publicity. I agree that this is distasteful, but in the same way I wonder if Jesse Jackson's remarks were on purpose to help Obama in the long run, I think this might do that too [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:02 PM Flag
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hmm, interesting though re JJ. would never have imagined him to be that crafty. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:08 PM Flag
[ - ] We are such babies about gas prices. Time for us to grow up. The second we have to pay prices barely approximating what the rest of the world pays, thereby requiring us to discipline our enormous consumption, we come up with the grand idea of lifting the ban on drilling. An idea that some people actually believe is good or even ballsy! 57 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:46 PM Flag
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I agree. I could get a car & drive 20 min to work, but I use public transportation & it takes 1 1/2 hours. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:47 PM Flag
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What about biking it? My commute from Brooklyn to Manhattan is 1+hours via car; 1:15 via MTA; 45-50 min via bike. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:50 PM Flag
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you bike in the snow and rain? do you have a job where you have to look presentable the moment you arrive? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:51 PM Flag
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yes. no. I change at work but in previous jobs I had a membership to a gym and showered/changed there. About the same time to do it there versus at home. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:05 PM Flag
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np: I also drop off my dd and carry a computer and bag with papers, etc-so all that would not fit on a bike! Wish I could though [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:07 PM Flag
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come on. If you wanted to do that you would make it work. There are bike trailers to transport kids. Or children seats for bicycles. Just look what other folks in European countries do. They bring their children, their briefcases etc. No problem. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:13 PM Flag
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ita. the dutch have it down to a science. quite frankly, there are so many other options. remember when people used to carpool to work? but to say that it's too expense to maintain our current habits so let's go destroy the environment even further, well, i think op is right on in ridiculing that. oh wait...i'm the op! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:15 PM Flag
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No, honestly, it is too many miles across really difficult territory. From the North Shore of SI to the Center would take me at least 3 hours each way. I already take a bus and have to walk part of the way- the walk alone is difficult. The hill I walk up is black ice in winter- some parts are not doable by bike. I mean, sure, if I was Lance Armstrong I could do it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:16 PM Flag
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You do it for a year or two and you will realize how easy it actually is. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:17 PM Flag
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Dude- are you even listening? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:18 PM Flag
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yes, I am but you are discouraged way too easily. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:21 PM Flag
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Honestly, I can't imagine biking for 3 hours to work and then having to change. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:23 PM Flag
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np ditto. That is just nuts. Things aren't that dire [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:25 PM Flag
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cyclist again: Figure you can cover about 10 - 15mph (with starts and stops and a not too aggressive pace to start.) If you have no desire, then ignore this -- but if you are wondering, it is a lot easier than you would think. What happens is you do it a few times, it gets easier, you find new routes, maybe make a riding buddy or two. Pretty soon, you are jonesing to ride more. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:31 PM Flag
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cyclist: the computer and papers issue are not insurmountable. Papers are easy, computer I'd probably just leave one at each location. Especially considering how cheap (and fragile) computers are. If you are not a comfortable rider and/or live in an urban environment, transporting your kid via bike is not a great alternative. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:18 PM Flag
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I work at home some days so have to carry it both ways. I ride the bus, so using public transport is pretty good, no? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:20 PM Flag
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I advocate cycling because I find it such a great way to interact with the world. Not just because it is an environmental plus. Yes, Mass Transit is good, it is great. (What I did when I started commuting is ride one way in the morning, leave my bike, take mas transit home and then mass transit back the next day and ride home. So, I got my ride/workout in every day but didnt have to do it 2x per day.) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:58 PM Flag
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It's unbikable. I live on Staten Island [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:06 PM Flag
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Bike to the ferry, and from the ferry to work. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:14 PM Flag
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I live and work on Staten Island. I would have to bike across an expressway, through the Greenbelt- it would take hours and hours [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:17 PM Flag
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Is SI included in the mayor's effort to make NYC a bike-friendly city? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:18 PM Flag
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sure, but SI is notoriously corrupt and incompetant in actuallizing urban planning. It's not the forgotten borough for nothing [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:20 PM Flag
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to whoever cares: the NYC bike map: http://www.nyc.gov/html/dcp/pdf/bike/mapback.pdf (This side has Staten Island. If you replace back with front in the URL you'll be at the other side of the map.) -cyclist [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 02:13 PM Flag
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and probably costs oodles less [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:56 PM Flag
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It would take me about 3 hours each way- also across a major expressway and up major hill ranges- just not possible [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:08 PM Flag
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see? Just like OP said. Babies (LOL) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:09 PM Flag
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Yeah, maybe I should wake up at 4, get a bike with a baby seat and a side car for my computer and bags, then bike for 3 hours in non-bike friendly streets. Then get to work and change, but still be sweaty and tired, and then do it again on the way home. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:18 PM Flag
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see? That's the spirit! Save the earth and all that crap! We should all live like they did in the olden days. I am currently riding a bike generator to provide electricity to run my computer. I grow all my own vegetables in containers on the roof and wear recycled paper towels for clothing [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:21 PM Flag
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how much time did you put into the route search? Nothing, right? I am very sure that you will find an easy "bikeable" route. Going up and down hills? Well, that is part of using a bike. You will get used to it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:15 PM Flag
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I take the bus, and to be honest, I'm not really interested in biking to and from work for 3 hours each way. If it was doable in 20-30 minutes, sure. I have looked at the route- some bike clubs do the trip to where I work once a year, but I'm not a cyclist. I can't bike for 6 hrs a day! Sorry! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:22 PM Flag
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I completely agree--but then again, we don't own a car. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:51 PM Flag
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ok. I agree that we need to work on alternatives. Fine. But what should we do in the meantime? Drilling for oil we have here makes sense. China is making deals with Cuba as we speak to drill close to our shores. I'd rather it was us out there than China. Remember all the recalls this last year or 2? Do you really want them out there? I don't understand why people think this is an either/or game. We can drill for oil AND work on alternatives. Right? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:56 PM Flag
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first, us drilling is going to have zero impact on china's decision to drill. it's not an either/or on this score. second, the more opportunity gov't has to focus on drilling rather than on alternative energy, the more procrastination there will be to put meaningful effort and resources into alternatives. that we consider further desecration of the environment to be an option is the very problem. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:58 PM Flag
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you are right about China not stopping b/c we drill. I mistated that. Sorry. But - why should they be out there getting the oil that we could be getting too? Makes no sense. And I do worry about their ability to do it safely! Maybe we can get up and running faster and beat them out of some of it at least. I think eveyrone realizes that we need alternatives. But, if gas goes up to $10 a galllon, it will really cripple the economy. I think people are working on alternatives. I'm not opposed to tax breaks for research etc to encourage more of that too. I just don't see it as an either/or situation [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:02 PM Flag
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I agree with this. It's one of the reasons I like living in NYC--built-in environmental good. We live in smaller spaces, don't drive as many cars, have steam heat for whole buildings, etc. Recently I've wondered about all the people w/second homes in NYC, though, having a whole extra place to keep up that they don't use much. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:00 PM Flag
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wondered what? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:05 PM Flag
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The rest of the world is used to high taxes and pay a sh!tload of those when they fill up the tank (there was a great NYTimes article a few days back). The increase in gas prizes is easily buffered in high tax countries and therefore they don't see such major increases like here. All that said, I think it is GREAT that many people start complaining about the prices. And the attitude that they should just look at what other people in other countries pay for gas is wrong. People should be discouraged to drive. Discouraged to waste natural resource. Encouraged to find alternatives. They should not make peace with high prices. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:12 PM Flag
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so how do you do that? WHo gets to decide what gas costs? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:13 PM Flag
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the government should tax the hell out of it [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:16 PM Flag
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personally, I don't like giving teh government any more power than I have to. It already far oversteps it's constitutional bounds IMHO [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:17 PM Flag
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the oil shortage is a national (even global) issue and the government has all the right to step in. Since this is a capitalistic country the only way to control habit is to target the pocketbooks. What do you think about the cigarette or alcohol taxes? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:21 PM Flag
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don't like them. I think taxing should be to raise $$ to perform valid functions of gov't. Period. I don't like using taxes to control behavior. This is supposed to be a free country right? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:22 PM Flag
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np - taxes do both! and considering all the negative health repurcussions of over indulging in drinking, smoking and gas consumption, i think it's perfectly valid for the government to tax impose high taxes on it. of course, they should be taxing those company profits as well. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:25 PM Flag
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LOL! You do realize that corporations don't actually pay taxes dont' you? They just pass that cost along to us. Any thoughts on the fair tax? I love it [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:26 PM Flag
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and we as customers accept those higher prices or not [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:30 PM Flag
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very true. I am a big believer in teh free market. I think that will take care of most problems all by itself without cumbersome corrupt government getting involved [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:31 PM Flag
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Ha ! you're the Libertarian I've spoken to before ! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 02:14 PM Flag
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wait. free as in anybody can do whatever he pleases? The government has no right to tell you to take it easy with those cigarettes or with your gas consumption? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:29 PM Flag
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afirmative. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:30 PM Flag
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you know that pure laissez faire is a recipe for disaster? It assumes that every individual is able to make the best choice possible anytime anywhere. Unfortunately, this is very far from the truth and therefore government has to step in and regulate and provide guidelines. What those are is, of course, debatable. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:35 PM Flag
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I'm not talking total hand off. I'm saying I don't like the gov't using taxation to control behavior. I think it's fine for the gov't to promote good habits with PSAs etc. I think the CDC etc are a great use of tax dollars. I don't like laws that govern what I can do in my own home. I'm not even a pure capitalist. I think child labor laws are a pretty good idea! I just think that the gov't has gotten waaaay too intrusive and spends far more $$ than they ought to. I think we should vote out every single last congressperson and senator we have and start over. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:38 PM Flag
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Yes, but Europeans pay so much for gas because it is so highly taxed. At least they are getting social services for the money they pay for gas. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:23 PM Flag
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Good point. Fondly, S. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:26 PM Flag
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Hi! I'm an oldtimer (used to use the initial K at one point...nice to "see" you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:37 PM Flag
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exactly ! I would happily pay more in taxes (and I am in the highest bracket) if it meant better and universal health care, better services for the elderly, guaranteed education, etc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 02:16 PM Flag
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I don't think it's so much the price that is so bothersome, but how quickly it went up. No time for adjustments when many people are already living check to check. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:26 PM Flag
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People seem to cope somehow. The high gas prices are definitely changing habits. That's a good thing. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:31 PM Flag
[ - ] Sonogram at 14 weeks - will my obgyn be able to tell me the sex of the baby? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Expecting 07.14.08, 12:38 PM Flag
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no [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:47 PM Flag
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Possibly. Do you want to find out? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:47 PM Flag
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its possible, but wont be that accurate... i was told the wrong sex at 16 weeks... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:24 PM Flag
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It's too early to tell for sure. Usually the mistake is made if they tell you it's a girl and turns out to be a boy (never heard of the error the other day around). I thin you have to be 16 wks to get accurate read. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:49 PM Flag
[ - ] I'd just like to point out that most museums aren't swimming in money- they are often struggling nonprofits. 18 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:34 PM Flag
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seems like most big Manhattan museums are doing fine... Met, MOMA,etc. Which ones are having a hard time ? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:36 PM Flag
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All the mid to small sized ones. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:40 PM Flag
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such as... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:41 PM Flag
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El Museo del Barrio, Bronx Museum, Whitney, American Folk Art Museum, Museum of TV & Radio, Japan Society, ICP... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:42 PM Flag
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Plus the historic houses, Historic Richmondtown, the Dahesh museum went under, the South St Seaport went under [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:43 PM Flag
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gotcha... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:44 PM Flag
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I could go on...the Noguchi Museum, Lower east side tenament museum, Museum of Chinese in the Americas. Plus, little known fact- the Cloisters (branch of the Met) has major structural problems and is falling apart [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:46 PM Flag
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that is because it was moved here and the foundation was not properly built. The Met has lots of money to work on it, but they're so worried about launching their major exhibitions at the main site [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:47 PM Flag
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What would be wrong about putting on major exhibitions? That's what their mission is. Met aside, most museums are non-profits in the truest sense [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:49 PM Flag
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Nothing at all about the exhibitions - my point was that the Met has tons of money, but rather than working to shore up the foundations at the Cloisters, they're "putting their money where their mouth is" because the Main site gets far more visitorship than the Cloisters ever will [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:50 PM Flag
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My overall point is that NYC has one of the richest arts environments in the world. The perception that museums blow money on acquisitions belies the fact that they struggle to get people in the doors, pay very little for staff, and are educational institutions- not big, greedy corporations. The main site at the Met is much more accessible than the Cloisters. Did you work at the Met? Are you happy to see P de Montibello go- I think he's done a good job. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:53 PM Flag
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I agree that it is more accessible, etc., and that NYC is very well-placed in terms of arts, and that most museums do not blow $$ on acquisitions, but I do wish that one could just stop into a museum for 30 minutes if that's all the time they have and not have to pay $20 (I know its a donation, but trust me, those ticket sellers get pretty hostile if you try to offer them $1). Yes, I have worked at the met, and am sorry to see PdM go, but I also think it is time for a change. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:56 PM Flag
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I've never experienced hostility at the door & trust me, I've made small donations. You could stop into a gallery for a 30 minute art fix, or a corporate gallery. Plus, most museums rely on the door- I mean, think of the Children's Museum and such; they aren't in it to make money, but to provide a service. You'd probably pay $10 for a movie, so $5 for a museum isn't so bad. Or go on the free nights. You can see art for free if you put a little effort out there... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:02 PM Flag
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Having worked in the museum world for a number of years I know all this, but I also wish that NY museums were able to do what they do so many other places - DC and London, for example, where museums are free at any time [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:03 PM Flag
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I love DC- the Smithsonian museums are tremendous. I agree- it would be nice to have that model. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:09 PM Flag
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np: so they are putting their money where the people's attention is... seems like they are being true to their mission. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:55 PM Flag
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well thanks for that [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:37 PM Flag
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I'm shocked by the poster who thinks that museums spend tons of money on acquisitions- it's just not true. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:41 PM Flag
[ - ] Need to find a playgroup UES/Carnegie Hill, ds is 18 months. What's the best way to find one? TIA! 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:32 PM Flag
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Playgroups tend to form from parents who meet at classes or friends of friends. I know a few people who found playgroups by approaching groups of Moms out in the park and asking if they could join in! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:46 PM Flag
[ - ] Does anyone ever feel guilty for the judgements you gave out pre-motherhood? Now that you know what it's like I feel like I should write a note to every mother I look down at and said I'll never be like that. My ds has totally humbled me. 13 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:31 PM Flag
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YES! I actually called a good friend and apologized to her for not helping her more and sympathizing with her when she had her db (when I was still child-less) At the time, I resented her for disappearing. Now i know better. I am just waiting for another friend to have a baby so i can lavish food, love, and babysitting on them. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:35 PM Flag
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children are the great equalizer [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:37 PM Flag
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I said my dcs would NEVER watch TV ds just watch 3 hrs of thomas videos while I finished reading a book. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:38 PM Flag
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no- I wasn't too bad. I mean, perhaps I didn't quite have the sympathy as I do know for a mom with a kid having a meltdown, but I never shot moms looks or made comments [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:39 PM Flag
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I was never openly judgemental but inside I blamed the mom [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:40 PM Flag
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yeah, people do- you kind of have to have a kid to know. It's just good advice all around- unless you've walked in someone's shoes, you shouldn't judge. You shouldn't judge even then- we should be so much easier on each other. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:10 PM Flag
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I still blame myself so I guess you always blame the mom [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 06:10 PM Flag
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it's been such a lesson to me about so many things you cannot understand in life until you've experienced it. I feel worst of all about how I pulled away from people when they had kids. I assumed that they did not want to hang out with the childless. Now I so appreciate it when a friend reaches out and hangs out w/ me and db. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:41 PM Flag
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No, I was right about a lot [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:52 PM Flag
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i like you [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:06 PM Flag
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like what? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:11 PM Flag
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i don't remember my pre-motherhood judgments. too fucking tired. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 06:13 PM Flag
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No guilt here. Every judgement has come back and bit me in the ass. Still doing penance. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 06:19 PM Flag
[ - ] Any advice? My 3.5 yo is having an increasing number of screaming hitting meltdowns. We try talking calmly, giving in to her reasonable requests, time-outs for hitting, ignoring the screaming and telling her we'll listen when she's calm. Nothing seems to work. She does have twin baby sisters but they are 9 months old. I thought she'd be over it by now. 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:31 PM Flag
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I was told by a child psch that 3.5 is the hardest age. Just ride it out the best you can I hear 4 is wonderful! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:35 PM Flag
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you're kidding!? This makes me feel a little better. I was afraid we had really done something to screw her up. Maybe we still are. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:40 PM Flag
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I don't think you can escape screwing them up. Just pray she doesn't hate you or put you in a nursing home when your old. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:42 PM Flag
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NP: my 4.5yo is tough too. you need to discipline more at 3 so 4 is better. i didnt discipline enough and she is tough. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:43 PM Flag
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she usually has screaming fits when we're getting ready to go somewhere. She missed camp on Friday because I told her she couldn't go if she didn't stop hitting. I'm trying to be consistent with consequences but I am not always--this morning we went off to the subway in mid-meltdown. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:46 PM Flag
[ - ] I have a UTI, ok that's miserable, but to add insult to injury, the medication is turning all of my underwear orange. On the bright side, the medication does take good care of the symptoms. 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:30 PM Flag
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how on earth is it doing that unless you're losing control? Buy some cheap underwear and wear that until you're done with the meds [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:31 PM Flag
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not losing control, can't figure it out actually. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:33 PM Flag
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just wear a liner in your underwear [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:39 PM Flag
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There's a great invention called panty liners. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:40 PM Flag
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