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Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] What are the best preschools in Los Angeles? And what are the best private high schools. Just moved here from NYC and trying to figure out the system. 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:48 PM Flag
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My daughter is at Turning Point and we could not be happier. It is a blend of the Montessori style, but still very warm, playful and inviting. It goes through the 8th grade and all the graduates get into top high schools: Crossroads, Wildwood, Harvard Westlake, Archer. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 05:53 PM Flag
[ - ] I'm disappointed that Obama campaign is asking New Yorker to apologize for the cover. Come on! Everyone who reads New Yorker gets it. 80 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
New York City 07.14.08, 02:46 PM Flag
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but not everyone who goes to news stands will. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:48 PM Flag
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Places that puts the New Yorker in the news stand have populations that are more sophisticated. I somehow don't think you can find it in the newsstand in the middle of oil fields. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:50 PM Flag
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no or but you are delusional. There are uneducated people in urban areas. You might be among them! (Kidding with the last comment...) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:51 PM Flag
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Should we stop everything we do bec there might be stupid people around us? We might as stop printing books, then, and sell books on tape in case people can't read. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:59 PM Flag
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that's bs, it's in every book store and airport. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:52 PM Flag
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that cover was just F'd up [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:48 PM Flag
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oh come on. It's satirical. This is the New Yorker. They do that all the time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:48 PM Flag
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there is satirical and offensive. In this day and age..that's is just wrong [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:49 PM Flag
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in this day and age of PC instead of factual? Of nice instead of making a statement. Grow up. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:51 PM Flag
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I am grown but I don't find making fun of others funny..not in the way they did it [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:54 PM Flag
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It was funny, you need to read a book and stop living your life like a nursery school fairytale [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:55 PM Flag
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What? Do you not have any sense of irony and intelligence? Should we not have comedy, too? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:51 PM Flag
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or: there is comedy and there is not funny. I guess since I'm a person of color, I don't find humor this kind of comedy ESP when terrorism is real. That's just me. You don't have to agree. This is a free country [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:53 PM Flag
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I am also a poc, but I think it's stupid to go after the New Yorker for god's sake. And only calling attention to whatever they didn't want people to see. People who actually believe this is for real are idiots and won't vote for him anyway. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:58 PM Flag
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ITA. Like Bill Maher said, if you can't do satire on the cover of the NYer, where can you do it. There's an article in the Times about it -- I'm an Obama supporter, but if we can't make fun of him because he's black, that sucks. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 06:21 AM Flag
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exactly. they do it all the time but no one, you understand, on the liberal side, is ALLOWED to make fun of obama. See Bill Carter's nytimes piece re: late nite comics stymied. It's pc'ness gone rampant: no one can touch race.http://www.nytimes.com/2008/07/15/us/politics/15humor.html?ref=television [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 06:30 PM Flag
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My dh is so mad that he actually called and canceled his subscription [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:59 PM Flag
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OMG, gag. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 03:00 PM Flag
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good for him [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 10:55 AM Flag
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Sounds like the SECOND dumb thing your husband did. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 06:36 PM Flag
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I so don't believe this, bc anyone who subscribes to that magazine well knows its format and why is Obama sacresanct? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.17.08, 03:00 PM Flag
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Rush Limbaugh would have been happy to have drawn that cartoon. Maybe he did. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 07:42 PM Flag
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I'm sophisticated and a subscriber. There's a difference between satire and just being offensive. I try to teach it to undergrads. It can be a difficult line--you have to be really good to pull it off. I think the cover fails at satire and is just offensive. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 08:50 PM Flag
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I completely agree. I'm a subscriber and have lived in New York City for 20 years and I thought it fell short at satire and was just ugly. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 06:27 AM Flag
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ita. Just b/c you call something satire doesn't mean that it's funny or tasteful. The NYer cover was neither. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 08:28 AM Flag
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You are really sad. Sad that you teach your students w/ half a brain that you have. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 06:45 AM Flag
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agreed. political correctness is rampant on campuses though so unsurprising. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 06:31 PM Flag
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Right on. She is an idiot. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 06:41 PM Flag
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Good luck with your ongoing mind-control, Dr. Mengele. Should a college student be able to understand the difference between clever and stupid? Yes, preferably BEFORE college. No wonder you feel threatened. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 06:34 PM Flag
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I really dislike both candidates. Obama is a lame-o and the NYer knows it. McC is an old old man. We really have a terrible choice here. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 09:12 PM Flag
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If they did something satirical about Jews there would be no end to the screaming about it. But they did it about Muslims, so that's OK. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 09:19 PM Flag
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np: Obama is not a Muslim. See this is the whole issue. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 07:59 AM Flag
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no one is saying here that obama is a muslim. that's not the issue at all. what they're saying is someone can poke fun at any people/religion/group except for islam and muslims. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 02:12 PM Flag
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"they did it about Muslims" who are the Muslims this refers to? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 07:22 PM Flag
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Um, are you retarded? It's OK? Honey, it's the most controvercial moment in the history of NYer covers! People are outraged! There are articles, news broadcasts, radio segments, blogs and UB threads about it. It has caused WAY more uproar than any anti-Jewish, pro-hitler, the-holocaust-never-happened piece of attempted satire could ever touch upon. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 07:17 PM Flag
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I agree 100%. I am once again saddened the that U.S. is so freaking humorless and moronic. To me it's like Archie Bunker -- they put him on to be a satire, but so many a$$holes agreed with what he was saying, they liked it for the wrong reason. people are offended because they believe that sh*t. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 06:20 AM Flag
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If they had done a cover with Obama and his wife depicted as apes in a jungle, would you find that to be satire??? Because New Yorkers "get" that that's a stupid image some people have of blacks. And they have the intelligence to see that it would really just be satire. Sure. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 08:25 AM Flag
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It's really sad that legitimate humore and satire is being banned. Obama should know better, really. And so should you. So quick to judge others and have a group think. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 09:18 AM Flag
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np: I was bothered by the cover before I knew anybody else's opinion. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 09:31 AM Flag
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If it were on Weekly Standard, of course. It was the New Yorker! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 02:53 PM Flag
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I think, in the current climate, there is no excuse for this in the public square. I'm not in favor of the government censoring the media BUT incumbent on that is that they censor themselves. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 03:00 PM Flag
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um, nothing's being banned. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 07:36 PM Flag
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np: It wasn't banned, it's just being criticized. I'm far from an Obama supporter, but I felt it crossed the line, too, even before everyone started commenting on it publicly. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 12:34 AM Flag
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you miss the point. obamas aren't being criticized (that i've heard or read) as apes in a jungle. there are, however, whispers that they are not 'patriotic', the he was raised moslem, and that the fist jab was a terrorist sign. So that is what is being satired. stay on topic, please. don't throw in irrelevant kitchen sinks. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 06:34 PM Flag
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The cover was ridiculous. And that was what the cartoon was meant to convey, the ridiculous rumors. New Yorker has lots of covers that are over the top ridiculous and satires/savages our misconceptions. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 09:41 AM Flag
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Thanks New Yorker for doing exactly what the right wing nuts have been dreaming of since Obama started his campaign. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 10:54 AM Flag
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Wow, you're SO nuanced. You must read the New Yorker. You probably move your lips when you read, but at least you have style. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 06:42 PM Flag
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To the OP: Can you name five things Obama has done that you do like/support? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 11:26 AM Flag
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Do you think I'm anti-Obama? Get real. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 03:03 PM Flag
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Every person I've known IRL who doesn't have a problem with that cover was already anti-Obama. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 03:24 PM Flag
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I'm sad about your company. I believe in first amendment rights as well as artistic expression. I believe, despite a small minority of people (whose minds would not have changed anyway no matter what), our nation has progressed so far and we are not as dumb as fear mongerers would have us. Every nation and every time satire was extinguished, it was always a dark time (oppressive) in their history. We can't pick and choose what we support to be true just bec it's our side being "hurt" (though I really don't believe Obama is hurt by this mosquito of a thing)... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 06:38 PM Flag
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OR: I too believe in first amend. and artistic expression, however I don't think that absolves the artist (or the publisher) of responsibility for content of that "art." You suggest Americans are above this kind of fear mongering. I would counter, in the last election, roughly 80% of the people voting to re-elect Bush STILL BELIEVED that Saddam Hussein had been responsible for 9-11. Mindful of that, I don't share your faith in the public. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 07:41 AM Flag
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I'm not naive but I do think except for few people who are bigots and won't be persuaded by reason, everyone else can think for themselves and especially those of us readers of TNY. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 07:43 AM Flag
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To suggest that that cover had only TNY readers as its target, that the editors were unaware the cover would cause this kind of storm, suggests a naivete on their part I find hard to believe. Just like the artist described below knew painting the "Virgin Mary" then flinging elephant dung on the canvas would cause a visceral reaction. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 08:17 AM Flag
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What? Are you suggesting that TNY wanted to get Rush Limbaugh crowd to read their mag? BTW, I am Catholic but also an artist and the elephant dung represented nature (it wasn't some flinging dung on the canvas). It was symbolic and it had a deep meaning. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 06:24 PM Flag
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No. I don't think they were hoping to get the far right to read them. I think they were looking for buzz. Hell, when was the last time an issue of TNY sold out? Other than getting pictures of Brangelina's newborn, how could a magazine get this kind of press? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 07:34 PM Flag
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I remember how people went crazy over the art pieces in Brooklyn museum (when Giuliani was mayor) and I thought that was ridiculous. You always find some people irrationally offended by something, but come on. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 07:44 AM Flag
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i'm pro-obama and i think the cover was just dumb. not super offensive, not particulary funny. just dumb. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 02:16 PM Flag
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It was satire - and since when is the Obama family exempt from this type skewering? Bush has been characterized as Hitler, and no one said a word. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 01:16 AM Flag
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Dammit, he's a Republican, the rules are different!!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 06:35 PM Flag
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It's time to end victimization politics of Jesse Jackson, right? Well, stop playing victim. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 07:25 AM Flag
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I didn't think it was offensive, but I also didn't think it was funny. And it's its unfunniness that is offensive! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 07:32 AM Flag
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Are you Seinfeld? Anyway, how many people think the New Yorker cartoons are funny anyway? That's how they are. TNY appeals to people with a diff sense of humor and intellect. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 07:35 AM Flag
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It's not a cartoon! It's a cover. The covers are usually witty and make me smile, not laugh out loud. This one just fell flat, I felt. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 07:44 AM Flag
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They had many, many covers that weren't funny (I dont' even find their cartoons funny). I think Obama people just don't know how to act gracefully. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 07:48 AM Flag
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usually New Yorker has perfect pitch. but this cover was way off. i am not sure exactly why. it just isn't in the same category with everything else they do. it was totally tone deaf - not funny, not satirical, just wrong. what were they thinking? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 07:35 AM Flag
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It IS satirical. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 07:49 AM Flag
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I don't think people would have thought this way had Obama not said anything. Obama made a strategic blunder by raising the issue. Now, even the people who would never read the New Yorker will see the picture and read about it from their local newspapers. It was a dumb move. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 07:46 AM Flag
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Obama never said anything, when he was asked about it by the press he totally downplayed it. But it got a lot of press regardless and some people at his campaign ended up criticising it heavily. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 02:27 PM Flag
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There you go, again. Throwing reality and facts into a perfectly good UB thread. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 02:47 PM Flag
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Downplay? No, he didn't. He should have not touched it at all. He commented on it. Now, he's off message. This story and the picture is all over the news for 4-5 days. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 06:22 PM Flag
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Stephen Colbert was talking about the cover last night and he said "It's funny because it's true." Now that's good satire! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 06:11 PM Flag
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I'd love to see a cartoon cover of McCain as a POW being tortured. Now that's satire! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 06:23 PM Flag
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If it's in context, sure. If DEMS or some radicals thought McCain fabricated POW story and if the story wasn't true or whatever other circumstance it might be. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 06:26 PM Flag
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Many people think that his POW experience has made him too mentally imbalanced to become president. I'll bet you can make a funny cover out of that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 07:37 PM Flag
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you could ask Rove for his Op Research on it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 07:44 PM Flag
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There actually was a cartoon about McCain in a POW jail made of bamboo sticks being tortured by other GOP candidates in Rolling Stones just a couple of months ago. Nobody cried foul and I get the cartoon. It's time we use our brains. BTW, even the people in the flyover states "get it" and they're not as dumb as you might think. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 08:52 PM Flag
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No. It would have to be a cartoon of him as a Manchurian Candidate after having bee brainwashed. See, he was a POW and he was tortured. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 07:38 PM Flag
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Like the cover that had Hillary as Robin Hood and Rudy about to mug her? Let's see - things that Hillary had done for New York: Zero, Rudy: too much good to mention. It is not satire as much as lampoon - this is the New Yorker's way of showing how FAR ABOVE IT ALL it is. They invert the opposite of the predisposition. Get it? If you don't, relax, you are NORMAL. The rest who "get it" are overly-nuanced UWS cocktail party denizens. Believe me, you'd rather pass than join. That oh-so-controversial New Yorker cover? YAWN. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 06:32 PM Flag
[ - ] Anyone think they were leaking Amniotic fluid but the swab showed you weren't. Then you continued to be very damp there and the next test showed you were? What happened? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:46 PM Flag
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no experience with your specific situation - plenty of experience knowing waht was going on with my pregnant body when doctors did not agree. YOU are the mommy. YOU have to take charge as hard as it is. Don't let anyone pooh paw what you say. If your doctor does, find another doctor, go to the hospital on your own. Do what you think is best to protect your baby. Good luck. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:49 PM Flag
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thanks. I did go and they said I wasn't leaking fluid but just wondered if anyone else btdt. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:50 PM Flag
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different story, but my doctors didn't listen to me. I'm an intelligent woman, and knew my subject well. I didn't care. I persisted. I was right. It is SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO hard. Best of luck to you and hope you have an uneventful rest of your pregnancy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:52 PM Flag
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tx so much [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:53 PM Flag
[ - ] I don't quite know how to articulate this, but I'll try. I feel like my nanny doesn't like it when I'm around. It's natural that when I'm around, my dd will be a bit less likely to listen to her, and also of course tries to get away with more. But I expect that, and when it's necessary, like she has to go to sleep or eat, I defer to the nanny. But sometimes like today, I'm home and trying to play with my dd, and the nanny is calling her to eat, even though I'm leaving in a few mins and dd doesn't want to go. Then, she suggests toys that she can play with in her room, in what seems like an attempt to get her away from me. I am sure I am exaggerating this in my mind, but in a sense, I feel like my nanny is competing with me for my own child. Anyone else have this experience? 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
Toddler 07.14.08, 02:42 PM Flag
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you have to get over it. You are the mommy. She is the nanny. Your dc loves both. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:44 PM Flag
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op: Oh, I have no doubt about what my child feels. It's more the annoying passive aggressive stuff from my nanny that irritates me. It seems she would want to encourage the child to be with her mom/dad. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:45 PM Flag
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you have to look at it from her point of view. Her boss was there and she was showing that she had a routine and control of the situation. No big deal really. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:47 PM Flag
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sounds more like she is trying to distract dd from you, which she probably feels compelled to do because you are after all paying her to take care of dd. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:46 PM Flag
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ita [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:48 PM Flag
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op: that's a useful perspective. Another situation that occurred recently was me asking my child while we were out if she would like to come home and be with us or go to the park with the nanny. My dd hesitated, and the nanny started showing her toys and saying you could come to the park and play with this stuff. I just thought it was strange that she would try to influence her choice, but I guess she might be thinking that I would prefer to be at home on my own doing work. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:49 PM Flag
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Yes, you do pay her to take care of your child and that is what she is trying to do. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:53 PM Flag
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WOHM here and you have to understand your nanny has her most of the time. She keeps her to an eating sleeping schedule, she needs the DC to stick to that because it is good for dcs to have consistency. When I stayed at home that us how I felt when Dh would come home late and want to disrupt the dcs schedule. The nanny is doing her job and you are getting in the way of her doing it. Try to compromise and give this woman the respect she has due to her and defer to the schedule she has cerated for your dc to properly care for her in your absence [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:55 PM Flag
[ - ] I have 3 kids, including b/g twins. Oldest DD didn't make G & T, but twin DD could make citywide, only thing I would consider b/c not interested in district programs. What is it like to have just one kid in G & T, especially a citywide? I don't mean logistically, but psychologically for the 3 kids? 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 07.14.08, 02:41 PM Flag
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I have no personal experience, but I will tell you that I was an academic star in my family. We had three children and it would have been fine for me to got to a gifted program and the other two sibs not. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:46 PM Flag
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I ask you this...what if one of your kids was a gifted gymnast? Would you deny that child the opportunities that came his/her way? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 03:42 PM Flag
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what do you mean by could make citywide? either she did or she didn't. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 03:50 PM Flag
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OP: She will be applying next year. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 06:50 AM Flag
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i think assuming your dc will score 99 on the olsat and cruise through the lottery is a huge assumption. the rules may be different next year, but i can't imagine it will be any easier to get in. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 06:52 AM Flag
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I have no delusions she will cruise through OLSAT. One of reasons I am asking this is b/c I need to decide whether we want to pursue it & do test prep. G & T office told me yesterday that will be basically the same. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 07:13 AM Flag
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you could start test-prepping tomorrow and your chances of dd getting into a citywide are still very slim. i'm not sure why you are counting your chickens at this point. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 07:19 AM Flag
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I am not counting my chickens at all -- to be honest, I hate the idea of dealing with all this G & T crap all over again. So if I decided it was a really bad idea to have just one kid in G & T then I wouldn't bother with the test prep. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 07:29 AM Flag
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why do you think dd could make citywide then? based on what? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 07:24 AM Flag
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Just b/c she is smart. And I say Citywide as district G & Ts are not a better option than the zoned school older DD will be attending. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 07:30 AM Flag
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lot and lots of smart dcs didn't wind up at a citywide this year. and if your zoned school is that good, why split your dcs up? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 07:33 AM Flag
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Zoned school is not that good. Just better than District G & Ts. In our district in Brooklyn, at least, they put the G & Ts in marginal or transitional schools. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 07:38 AM Flag
[ - ] It's your toddler's nap time. What would you do if you find your toddler's nanny sound asleep in the kid's bedroom (laying in the adjacent bed)? And you find out this has happened repeated times. Do you think this is acceptable? What would you tell her? 43 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:36 PM Flag
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of course it is fine for your nanny to take a nap at the same time in the same room as your toddler. I'm a great mom and do it all the time. You can't hold her to a higher standard than I hold myself. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:37 PM Flag
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really? I am not paid to nap at my job -while is it ok for someone's nanny? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:39 PM Flag
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sorry -i meant "why", not "while" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:40 PM Flag
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np; but what was the arrangement? Is she to clean while he sleeps? How about those nannies that shop while pushing their charge? They aren't paid to do personal shopping but still do [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:40 PM Flag
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why wouldn't you want your nanny refreshed and in a great mood when your toddler wakes up? If you want to be "paid to nap" then may I suggest you change careers? You sound like a total B(&ch [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:41 PM Flag
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ITA [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 04:14 PM Flag
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Why isn't it? You would rather she be tired and cranky with your child? Taking care of a toddler all day is tiring. A nap is great! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:42 PM Flag
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I'm not a nanny, I'm a sahm. I know how hard it is. A nap does us both good. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:43 PM Flag
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But you do get to go out for lunch (by yourself) and I'm sure you have other perks. Jobs are different. Apples and organges. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 03:38 PM Flag
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what is she supposed to be doing -- sitting with her ear to the monitor, staring into space? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 03:50 PM Flag
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no, organizing the kids closet. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 03:50 PM Flag
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and moving the barbells to the attic and working on the slipping transmission. Give her a break. taking care of children is exhausting and she's probably a better nanny and is more diligent and kind and loving with your DC when they awaken. When you invite someone in to take care of your most precious thing, you should treat them with a little love as well. It goes a long way. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 04:24 PM Flag
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you are preaching to the choir. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 04:31 PM Flag
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I don't have an issue with her getting shut eye while my dc naps. As long as she's not sleeping and dc is up running around alone [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:39 PM Flag
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I agree. Why would this be an issue if dc is also asleep? (I'm assuming that she's not responsible for cleaning or is finishing all her other responsibilities) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:42 PM Flag
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op: yea, she holds other responsibilities (and she agreed to) like light clean up. I have asked her to do other things on nap time but I find that unless I insist she won't do them. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:44 PM Flag
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then that's an issue for you to discuss and if she doesn't agree then she needs to be let go [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:45 PM Flag
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is the house clean when you get home? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:47 PM Flag
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no, that's my point. She is not doing what I asked her to do. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:52 PM Flag
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Then if she's not doing what she agreed to do, and I hope you're being reasonable with your definition of light cleaning, then it has nothing to do with the naps, it has to do with her not doing her job. You sound fixated on the naps, when that's really not the issue. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:55 PM Flag
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op: oh, she IS sleeping. I've caught her sound asleep and what bothers me is that she acts like nothing happened. She could have at least asked me if I mind her doing that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:42 PM Flag
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you have caught her sleeping while your dc is up and about alone in the house? That would bother me but if she napped while he napped..I'm ok with that as long as she gets up with dc [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:43 PM Flag
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No, as far as I know she is not asleep with kid roaming around - so that's good.I guess what bothers me is that she didn't mention to me and while I expect that she is doing some house fixing, she is napping! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:48 PM Flag
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does she need to mention how long she spends in the bathroom each day too? You've never answered if she is keeping the house straightened. If she is, then you should stop gripping and wanting her to do even more. She's got a lot on her hands with cleaning and taking care of DC. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:51 PM Flag
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op answered above that she is not doing all the jobs she agreed to do. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:55 PM Flag
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yes, as a backup so she didn't sound like a loon. If you read the op it has nothing about housework and everything about naps. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 03:55 PM Flag
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Are you serious? You are way too controlling. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:45 PM Flag
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you don't dictate every moment of her day. It's ridiculous to assume she would ask permission for something that is not impeding her doing her job. I'm glad you're not my boss, because you sound very micromanaging. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:46 PM Flag
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ditto [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:50 PM Flag
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I'm with the op at being shocked at this. I would not expect a nanny to be napping. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:51 PM Flag
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op: I already said this, but I'll answer your question again: no, the house is not clean when I get home. She picks the toys up, yes. But light house clean up: no. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:54 PM Flag
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did she think that you meant tby light clean up that she would clean up after dc? Most nannies I know only clean stuff related to childcare (ie the dishes from lunch, dcs cloths, toys) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:57 PM Flag
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Well by light clean I mean vacuuming the areas where my kid hangs out: her room, bathroom and den once a week. Keeping her bathroom clean as well (once a week light clean as I already have a housekeeper that does the thorough clean up). Keep her closet (toys, clothing) organized. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 03:00 PM Flag
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has this been clearly spelled out to her? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 03:01 PM Flag
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honestly you sound pretty controlling, and she sounds very laid back; it may just not work out between the two of you because your styles don't work out, but that does not mean she's a bad nanny [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 03:03 PM Flag
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well maybe that's the case. She is very nice with my kid and she loves her, which is why I still use her. But find her lack of "proactiveness" in other fronts really frustrating. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 03:05 PM Flag
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She's not the maid and the expecatation that she organize your dc's closet if a bit over the top. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 03:11 PM Flag
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it sounds like you have a jem of a nanny, she's just not type A enough to meet your expectations of household cleanliness. This is probably not going to change. So if you can't handle it, you need a new nanny, but keep in mind that a more type A nanny will probably treat dd like a job, and not love her nearly as much. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 03:15 PM Flag
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^^^ this from a sahm that rarely vacuums or organizes closets as much as I try;) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 03:16 PM Flag
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yes... it was clear from day one and i remind her that once a week she has to vacuum -but i have found out she just doesn' do it -or she does it like, once every three weeks. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 03:04 PM Flag
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you need a maid, my dear. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 04:14 PM Flag
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I know of a nanny who was caught sleeping by the Mom but the child had woken up and got into all sorts of things. The nanny didn't think she had done anything wrong. She was fired. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:57 PM Flag
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happens all the time here. I think it's fine. why not? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 03:48 PM Flag
[ - ] do teh fitflop really work? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:34 PM Flag
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*the [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:34 PM Flag
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what do you think? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:41 PM Flag
[ - ] 25 wks pg and this kid is pushing down into my vagina. He can't come out this soon so he'd better lay off the seal 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:32 PM Flag
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I don't want to scare you, but if you feel presure - you shoudl call your doctor and describe it. I gave birth at 20 weeks. You can't be too careful. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:35 PM Flag
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op: this is my 3rd dc. He is just pushing and moving around. When he pushing a certain way, he puts pressure there. It's not happening like a contraction or every few min. Just a few times. Thanks for being so caring. I know things can go wrong (was in the LnD yesterday) but everything looks good. May I ask what happened with you? If not please I understand and sorry I'm bringing it up [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:38 PM Flag
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Thanks, not into all the details, but it was my first preg so I had no point of reference. Hindsight is 20/20 and babies are too precious - so when someone mentions a problem or presssure, I usually encourage them to talk to doctor. For some reason, women don't want to complain and "bother" the doctor - but that is why they get the big bucks! Take it easy! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:55 PM Flag
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thanks and yes I agree that we shouldn't take the little signs for granted. I had no issue with calling my OB and going in to the hospital for test. I'm glad I did. I also agree that many ppl are too worried about bothering their Dr's..that's their job. Thanks again [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:56 PM Flag
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I'm 28 weeks and have hideous crotch pain. Wish the kid would be just a little bit higher. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:47 PM Flag
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op: i know what you mean [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:48 PM Flag
[ - ] - My daughter just turned 14 months and I am thinking of her school prospects... any advice on how to prepare for enrollment in the top schools in NYC? I was told that I am late which scares me but any advice will be welcomed. Also, can you recommend advisors that do this sort of thing? Many Thanks! 14 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
Toddler 07.14.08, 02:27 PM Flag
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You're not late. You apply for her to enter the year she turns 3 for nursery school (some do have 2s programs, but not all of them). You can ask Parents League. It's not as hard as you think [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:28 PM Flag
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that is to say you apply for her the fall before the year she is to enter, most programs start at 3s, others have younger programs [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:29 PM Flag
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God I'm so glad I can just send my kid to public school. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:28 PM Flag
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we can all send our kids to public school but some ppl want to send their dc to preschool and not wait until K for public [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:30 PM Flag
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That's true. Hadn't thought about that part. It's less competitive out here (not in NYC) for preschools and we're just doing the co-op that's closest to home. And I didn't mean to sound snarky--we have friends in SF dealing w/ the school headache there and that and NY sound so stressful when it comes time to send the kids--whether it's preschool or kinder. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:32 PM Flag
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yes it can be stressful but it's what you make it. I have 2 dc in private schools and didn't kill myself over it. I applied, visited and waited. I had a back up if they didn't get a spot (catholic school) but I do know some ladies who get all wacko with the process. It's unfortunate there are too many kids and not enough spots [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:35 PM Flag
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It happens to out here (in CA) but we're more spread out and there are fewer schools. We did consider private school for DS but I'm happy we went w/ our local public. It's excellent and I think I fit in best there. It's a great community. It sounds like you've got a great attitude. Our friends in SF do as well, but it would make me crazy to have a perfectly great public school right down the block and not be able to send my kid there. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:38 PM Flag
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yes if we had a great public option we may have used it but our public zone school is failing. That wasn't an option for us [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:41 PM Flag
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you aren't late. Please save yourself and do the research on your own. You will find many neurotic moms who have had their kids lives planned as soon as the sperm hit the egg. Just go to ISAAGNY.ORG and there is a list of the majority of the city's preschools..also their links. I have 2 kids that have been and are in preschool. What area do you live in? I could suggest downtown schools if this is good for you [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:29 PM Flag
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Live in Westchester but work in NYC. Thanks for the web address -- will check it out. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.15.08, 08:03 AM Flag
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sounds like your kid was born in March, which means she won't be 2 years, 9 months in September 2009. So not old enough for many (not all) preschool programs starting in the fall of 2009. So you're "limited" to 2s programs or daycare (shocking, I know). So really calm down. Find 2s programs in your neighborhood or just send her to lots of enrichment classes next year. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:35 PM Flag
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you are out of your mind. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:47 PM Flag
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For the original poster - I think that you mentioned you live in Westchester and work in NYC? If yes, could you tell me how long your train ride and overall commute (one way) is into the city? And what train station you go to? We're relocating to NYC and trying to find something with a reasonable commute into the city. Thank you!!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.29.08, 07:10 AM Flag
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NP but here are some tools for guestimating suburban commutes. If you go to MetroNorth, LIRR, or NJTransit sites (the commuter railroads), you can see the train times every weekday morning and then you can use HopStop or StopHop (Forget) to time the trip from Grand Central or Penn Station to your job. Some of the shortest commuter suburbs are Pelham, Mamaroneck, Larchmont in Westchester and South Orange, Maplewood, Millburn in NJ. Hoboken, Forest Hills and Park Slope are family friendly places on train lines that are alternatives to Manhattan but give you a little more flexibility in your commute. GL. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.29.08, 08:24 AM Flag
[ - ] Took positive pg tests last night and this am. Was crampy today, but no bleeding. Anyone have this too? From looking around on the internet it seems ok, but wanted to know if anyone else had this. So easy to be freaked out at this stage! 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:25 PM Flag
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I had this with all 3 pg. Crampy is very normal [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:25 PM Flag
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^^BTW Congrats [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:26 PM Flag
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thanks! so doesn't feel real yet. first time mom... when does it feel real??? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:26 PM Flag
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aww I remember with my 1st pg and the cramps. I would run to the bathroom and look for blood. I was very nervous until I saw the HB and OB said it was all good. It will feel real when you go and hear or see the HB for the first time. When you get your first ultrasound, be prepared to cry (I did all 3 times) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:28 PM Flag
[ - ] McCan keeps talking about Czechoslovakia, a country that hasn't existed for 15 years. I thought he was supposed to know so much about foreign policy? He's a moron. 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:25 PM Flag
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He's old and his knowledge of the world is dated. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:34 PM Flag
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did you read the piece the other day about how he appkied for a marriage license before he was divorced from wife #1 ? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:35 PM Flag
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no, but I read about how one professor analyzed whether he was legally qualified to be president and concluded that he is not. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:42 PM Flag
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watch out Alzheimer's... remember how we all laughed off Reagan's quirks of memory? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:38 PM Flag
[ - ] Cocktail time ! If you're here, Mill Valley mom, just a few more hours for you ! 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:24 PM Flag
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Another CA mom here--thanks for thinking about us. I'm off to The Police & Elvis Costello tonight and I'll make sure to mix up a vodka tonic before we go. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:28 PM Flag
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I LOVE E-L-V-I-S ! Once saw him at the Sweetwater in Mill Valley with about 100 people ! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:29 PM Flag
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He's the real draw for me. DH is more excited about The Police. Elvis is one of my top 5 singers ever I think. It's our anniversary week so this is our big gift to each other. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:30 PM Flag
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saw the Police here (Atlanta) and it was a big snore... nothing spontaneous, nothing that made you feel they were excited, and - as has come out - they hate each other and being on tour. Now, Mr. Costello is a genius and I would be thrilled to see him last night. Last summer we took our DC to see him and they loved it ! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:31 PM Flag
[ - ] do you think your friends really know you ? 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:23 PM Flag
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maybe like 85-90% but I'm the only one who truly knows me. DH knows me like 95% [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:24 PM Flag
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Do you keep the other 5% hidden ? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:25 PM Flag
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or: not really hidden but I think there is a part of me that only I really know (my inner most secrets, desires and thoughts) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:26 PM Flag
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I think I'm a hider... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:27 PM Flag
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I don't disclose this 5% because to me it's very private but I think if my dh asked about it, I would discuss. Hmm maybe I'm like you...a hider [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:31 PM Flag
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I have four really great friends from college and yes, they know me. It's been too long to hide anything. I have two friends that I made as an adult and they know a great deal about me (because I share - that's what friends do), but they do not know 100% [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:28 PM Flag
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I don't think I can share all the dark nasties that I hide, but maybe others don't have all that inside... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:30 PM Flag
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you don't have to. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:36 PM Flag
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My two best friends and my sister know me really well, though I don't think it's possible for someone to know you 100%. My very best friend in the world though, we're pretty comfortable letting each see the darker bits. We've built up a lot of trust over the years. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:31 PM Flag
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I think sometimes I have to be the funny snarky cheerleader when i want to crawl into a cave. I just don't know what people would do if I said that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:32 PM Flag
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Don't you think your closest friend(s) would get it and be okay? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:35 PM Flag
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they'd get it, but then I'd feel I was getting them down. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:38 PM Flag
[ - ] how often did you bathe your 3 month old? is it too much to do it every night? 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
Newborn 07.14.08, 02:19 PM Flag
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I wouldn't do it every night unless dc is really dirty. I bathe every other night [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:20 PM Flag
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I think every night is too much. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:21 PM Flag
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i did it every night because my DB loved it... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 02:21 PM Flag
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OP: thanks. my twins love it, too. it also signals to them that it is time to wind down. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 05:06 PM Flag
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we did this with our first dc, then did a whole massage with lotion. total wind down. find what works for your kids. fwiw, i rarely bathe 2nd dc-too much work, and dc always seems clean (I need to do it more-it is like once a week or so) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 05:28 PM Flag
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i bathed mine every night. good for sense of routine imho [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.14.08, 05:30 PM Flag
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