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Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] Recommendations for running shorts with built in underwear that are loose fitting and not short? At least 6 inches long. Thanks 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:41 PM Flag
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I wear a running skirt from Athleta to meet this need. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:44 PM Flag
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Like Athleta and the Mondetta brand---had bought before at TJ Maxx--but they sell online @ Sierra [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:03 PM Flag
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Oiselle [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:21 PM Flag
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ditto [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 10:00 PM Flag
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Thanks. Never tried these and ordered 2 pairs! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.20, 12:24 PM Flag
[ - ] Out of curiosity, how many dates would you say you typically wait/waited before having sex with someone? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:40 PM Flag
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3 years [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:41 PM Flag
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lol [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:01 PM Flag
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0, 1 tops [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 10:29 PM Flag
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5-7 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.20, 05:29 AM Flag
[ - ] »Because our economy can’t handle it. People need to help themselves." I am the OP of an earlier post about the end of the federal boost to the unemployment benefits, and just came back and saw this last reply. This really makes my blood boil. You think DH and I wouldn't LOVE to "help ourselves" and get back to work???? DH has been in the restaurant industry for over 20 years (fine dining, no chance of outdoor seating where he was) and IS applying to other types of jobs to no avail. My industry is also hard-hit and I'd be willing to take any job I could if I could get an interview! These are not normal times where people just need to pull themselves up by the bootstraps and get a job for god's sake. 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:27 PM Flag
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I'm sorry OP. And I agree with you. We have never been through anything like this. I wish you and your family the best. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:41 PM Flag
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op: Thank you, that means a lot. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:48 PM Flag
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pp - by the way, I know I'm lucky because dh has his job and does well (although he's not a good person) but I've been unemployed for almost 2 yrs, have been applying left and right, to anything I can find - and not even an interview in the past 4 months - so I understand that even applying to other industries does not help, its very frustrating - everything is paused. Hang in there please. I just hope to get a job so I can start again on my own. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:01 PM Flag
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Same here. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 09:06 PM Flag
[ - ] At what age did you start leaving DC home while you ran a quick errand? 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:18 PM Flag
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10-11 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:36 PM Flag
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My DCs rode the subway by themselves at 10. 8 is fine. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 09:47 PM Flag
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10, of just an errand by foot. 11 before I took a bus or subway ride somewhere a bit further away. ( pre covid) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:38 PM Flag
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9, leaving DC while I ran to the store on the corner. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:40 PM Flag
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8 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:02 PM Flag
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8-9 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:09 PM Flag
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9 - but we also then had to get her a cell phone since we don't have a land line. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:30 PM Flag
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10 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 09:17 PM Flag
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9 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 09:18 PM Flag
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9 - for 15-30 min. 13 and 9 year old stay home together for half a day before I feel guilty. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 09:19 PM Flag
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6 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 10:29 PM Flag
[ - ] ISO new dentist UES/Midtown East area preferred. Someone who does really good cleanings, has clean, up to date office and takes insurance.Any recommendations would be appreciated! TIA 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:54 PM Flag
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Dr Bobby Vijay [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:55 PM Flag
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Happy Smiles, Dr. Julie, so good [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:43 PM Flag
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OP - thanks, but looking for me - not DC! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:57 PM Flag
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Dr. Ari Kramer. 60th between Lex and Park. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:54 PM Flag
[ - ] when your account is banned, do all your posts get deleted? I'm seeing a bunch of deleted posts right now, and many of them seemed harmless. Wondering what is going on. 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:34 PM Flag
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Somebody who claimed to be in-the-know (and take it with a grain of salt; I don't know if this is true or not) once posted a comment answering the same question as yours. She said that there are two ways UB can ban you. One of them just bans you, and the other one bans you and deletes all your posts and comments from the past few days. Again, I have no idea if this is accurate. But if true, then the second one would explain what you're asking about. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:42 PM Flag
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I noticed this as well. Like the person who said she was managing through covid by having sex 2x a day. Uhhh. I wanted to hear more haha. Post deleted. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:50 PM Flag
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+1. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:01 PM Flag
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What...how did that get deleted. I also want to hear about someone having sex twice a day. I'm getting none so must live through others. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:18 PM Flag
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ooo i need to hear this, 3mo postpartum and waiting to get my bc prescription (cannot wait!!!), so need to live through others [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:56 PM Flag
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My account was banned. This is how it happened: first I had some replies that were reported (I assume) and deleted. And then I had one post or two deleted three minutes after posting. Then one day, when I tried to log in, I couldn’t and got a message saying my account is banned. Since I couldn’t log in, I don’t know if my other posts were deleted. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:14 PM Flag
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This place does seem to ban accounts really quickly. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:47 PM Flag
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I doubt the moderators worry about how "quickly" any account is banned. If people get out of line, they go. As somebody who's been hear two or three years now, I'm happy to see the shitheads get chucked! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:55 PM Flag
[ - ] Has anyone regretted moving to the suburbs from the city? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:31 PM Flag
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Nope. No-one ever has. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 09:49 PM Flag
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I know a family at our school who moved to NJ and then moved back. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.20, 12:12 AM Flag
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I hated it w a passion [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.20, 01:21 AM Flag
[ - ] Are teachers getting laid off at your kids’ school? Where I used to work, one person was cut per department. My principal said we are safe for this upcoming year. Please pay your tuition on time. It makes a difference. 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:29 PM Flag
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i don't think people are just 'not payng their tuition on time' so much as have lost their jobs, income or been furloughed - we fall into that category - had to halt tuition payments as dh lost his job. we will pay back when we can but this situation is impacting across the board [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:32 PM Flag
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are you asking about private schools in nyc? or just in general? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:39 PM Flag
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Op- private. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:43 PM Flag
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I have worked in private my whole career. My principal told me that our jobs are safe for Sept. He can’t say the same for Sept 2021. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:46 PM Flag
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I agree that economic ramifications will be delayed in some sectors. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:57 PM Flag
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I'm in Illinois and our superintendents have been told that this coming spring, so spring of 2021, that they should expect to lose upwards of 40% of their budgets. Maybe more. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:44 PM Flag
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schools need to provide more info to get people to pay tuition on time. no one wants to pay $50k for remote learning [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:08 PM Flag
[ - ] How assertive are you about money decisions when the money is DH's? DH has a bit of a record of making poor investments that I have called as being bad ideas at the time, but this was before we married so I did not push him. Now we have two children and I have moved into a lower paying job to be more available for them. He recently inherited money and is looking to invest again, and again I think is making bad decisions. One position that it's his money and I should stay out of it. The other is that he's made a number of representations to me about the life we'll be able to give our kids on the basis of this money, so I deserve to have a say. How would you handle? 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:27 PM Flag
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DH and I consider all money our money, regardless of the source. If he makes bad decisions, I would be very assertive, as in, "Let's get a financial planner." [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:36 PM Flag
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+10000 it's not his money, it's also your kids (if you want to leave yourself out of it) so you have a say also. get a neutral 3rd party if needed, if only for the convo about risks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:26 PM Flag
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+2. I am actually better at investing but DH likes to pretend he makes decisions. At the end he does listen to me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:10 PM Flag
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With my dh, all money is our money. You are allowed to insist on getting professional advice together, and it doesn't have to be because of his previous poor decisions, it can just be about moving forward with a clear financial plan. Also, a plan can include him having a percentage to "play" with, but that comes after you both agree on the big picture. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:30 PM Flag
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You are all in good marriages I guess, that is the way it should be. But my dh won't even check with me for investments or other... he moves all money and decides where it goes/what it is for - as a matter of fact he manages all of it. I have been out of work for the past 3 years, he does extremely well. But is very controlling. Not good at all... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:48 PM Flag
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I'm sorry, that sounds very difficult. I don't have an answer, just support for you trying to change this dynamic with your dh. You deserve to have a say. What you do or don't earn shouldn't matter. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:03 PM Flag
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pp- thank you for your words. Unfortunately nothing I ever say or do will make him change, he's a bully. Became a different person right after we got married... I am trying to leave. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:22 PM Flag
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In your position, I would not stay home with my kids. You can not depend on this asshole. I was a sahm for 5 years and I make less than dh but will have a pension and we make plans together for all of our money. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:27 PM Flag
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yes, I agree, that is why I have been actively looking for a job (unfortunately not easy at present) and also see no future in the marriage - he is not supportive at all. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:37 PM Flag
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My friend's DH moved money out of their joint account to his own account. He then secretly bought a condo and came home from work one day and said he was moving out. 4 days later, GF moved into the condo. She eventually got her share but it took a divorce. Just make sure the inherited money is co-mingled with your assets; then you always will get half. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.20, 12:57 AM Flag
[ - ] I do I give my male boss anonymous 360 feedback saying he is creating a frat boy culture when I am the only woman on his leadership team? He will surely know it's from me. Something about inclusive culture in general? Valuing diversity (of which there is none on the team except me)? 15 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:17 PM Flag
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Why does it have to be anonymous? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:20 PM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:23 PM Flag
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That is the way the request was sent out. It's "unattributed" feedback. I suppose I could sign my name but that might screw the other people who don't want to be known by eliminating me as a possible responder. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:37 PM Flag
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I think I’d find a different way to raise this, where it doesn’t seem to be targeted to one individual [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:25 PM Flag
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Don't do it, and start looking. There's no good way out of this one. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:29 PM Flag
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OP: Ugh. I fear you are right. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:38 PM Flag
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I have seen this a number if times (worked in the cannabis industry for a time, which is a frat boy culture nightmare across the board). If he's creating this culture, it's because he enjoys this culture. He will just remove the buzz kill (you). Your work will get scrutinized until they can find a way to get rid of you that is not obviously because you made this complaint. Do not bother. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:45 PM Flag
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OP, listen to the above poster! This is the right advice. I was in a similar culture and realized too late that the VC team funding the company had forced my hire in an attempt to fix what they saw as a frat boy culture. Unfortunately the exec leadership team and founders were happy with their frat boy culture and did everything possible to marginalize me, bash my ideas, and scrap my projects. I quit and it was the right thing to do. But it did sting to see all the work I’d done that they’d dismissed suddenly get revived as “their” initiatives. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 09:31 PM Flag
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OP: ugh, I can see this happening and then the congrats going to him [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.20, 12:26 PM Flag
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I hate to say I agree. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:47 PM Flag
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Why don't you ask the non "frat boys" if they like the culture or not. Maybe more than one of you wants a more inclusive environment. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:41 PM Flag
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Actually, maybe commend him for the good ole boy feeling within the team and how it boosts productivity. But that it could be better if there were after work outings to clubs. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:27 PM Flag
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*more* after work strip club outings [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:36 PM Flag
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"gentlemen's clubs" [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.20, 04:13 AM Flag
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OP: ha! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.20, 12:26 PM Flag
[ - ] Warning - TMI bathroom question...I wouldn't say I'm constipated, because I have a bowel movement at least every other day, but my stool isn't normal - it's small, sort of hard pieces. I incorporate lots of fiber into my diet and drink lots of water, but it's been like this for a while. Prunes and Miralax don't help. Should I see a doctor? 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:14 PM Flag
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Are you dehydrated? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:46 PM Flag
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No, I drink a lot of water and urinate frequently. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:47 PM Flag
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Try "smooth move" tea right before bed. It's basically just the senna leaf but should loosen you up. I'd try that a few days just to get things softer and then stop and see if it makes much of a difference. I'd also ask how's your fiber intake? Sometimes it's not just water. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:52 PM Flag
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Yes, I eat lots of fruit and vegetables, chia seeds, fiber cereal etc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:23 PM Flag
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Are you getting your fiber intake via supplements? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:21 PM Flag
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No, from food [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:23 PM Flag
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Perimenopausal? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:42 PM Flag
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Calculate your fiber intake. Many think they get enough but they don't. Should be 35 grams at minimum [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:58 PM Flag
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Perimenopausal here. Had the same phase about last year. Last a few months, got worried and had a colonoscopy. Glad I did because they found small stuff, nothing major, but still glad to get that done. Anyways, a stool softener helps. That colonoscopy cleanse process seemed to reset my system though. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:30 PM Flag
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Thanks, but I'm in my 20s. Miralax hasn't helped me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:49 PM Flag
[ - ] Curious about the demographics of UB now. Age, martial status, professions, # of kids, location in country and HHI. 24 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:14 PM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:15 PM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:22 PM Flag
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I love how your lost of cities keeps changing. Aspen is a relatively new addition, Brentwood has dropped off. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:23 PM Flag
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38, married, IT/Project management, 1, Brooklyn, $275K [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:23 PM Flag
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42, married, Finance/finance, 10 DS, 5 DD, Bay Area, 600K [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:27 PM Flag
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32, married, 2 kids, NYC, 750k [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:31 PM Flag
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What industries? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.20, 12:51 AM Flag
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62, married, retired consultant and retired trader, 6 ds, nyc, $1MM [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:45 PM Flag
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Are you a man? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:24 PM Flag
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woman [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:52 PM Flag
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Do you have 6 sons or did you have a kid at 56? Either way - wow! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:50 PM Flag
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i have 4, DH has 2. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 10:38 PM Flag
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45, married, lawyer, 2 kids, CA. HHI currently 125k as I am the only one working [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:53 PM Flag
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39, married, sahm/finance, 3 DCs, NYC area country house, 1.5MM [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:58 PM Flag
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55, married, law/finance, 2 kids, manhattan, 3MM+ depending on the year [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:33 PM Flag
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52, married KS, 2 dc, business owner, 245K [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:51 PM Flag
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wow, 3mm per year. What's your fixed expenses every month? and discretionary? Just wondering how the rich lives!!! Do you fly via private jets? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:40 PM Flag
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we live WAY below our means. public school, fly economy (soemtimes i get wacky and do economy plus). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 09:59 PM Flag
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42, married, investment management, 2 kids, NYC [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:48 PM Flag
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51, divorced, Project Manager/Architect, 2 kids, NYC, 115K. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:31 PM Flag
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Gathering information to hack people? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 09:13 PM Flag
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45 Married, Education / Technology, UWS, 350K [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 10:13 PM Flag
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49, married, media, 2, NYC, $350k give or take [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 11:19 PM Flag
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45. married, higher education/SAHM, 2, Pittsburgh, $180K [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.20, 04:10 AM Flag
[ - ] Does anyone have any insight on how tier 2 tier 3 schools are doing in Manhattan? Any messaging of cutbacks or enrollment attrition? 21 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:03 PM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:13 PM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:14 PM Flag
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Do you know this or are you just guessing? I spoke to a friend in admissions at a 3/4T school who said they had an influx of applications for 6th this year and they are completely full. Some people may be leaving, but others are choosing private school for the first time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:22 PM Flag
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np. I think people who are scared that publics may not reopen are jumping over to privates. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:06 PM Flag
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NNP The converse is also true. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.20, 12:10 PM Flag
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I have dc in a 3T school and we are not hearing anything about cutbacks or attrition issues. They have provided increased FA to current families though. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:23 PM Flag
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I'm just sort of curious how OP describes her child to people: "Dylan attends a third or fourth-tier school..." [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:27 PM Flag
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yeah like how do you know if you are 2t or 3t? or 4t? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:34 PM Flag
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OP: just saying, not Dalton, Trinity, Collegiate, etc., as those schools may have very different dynamics. Didn’t you understand what I was trying to convey??? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:03 PM Flag
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OR: I understand perfectly, but your choice of words was interesting. Hence the question. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 09:02 PM Flag
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Everyone else here seemed to capture my choice of words, troll. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 09:09 PM Flag
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Understand perfectly: your school isn't worth the money and you're "anywhere but public." [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 09:54 PM Flag
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Far from the truth. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 10:49 PM Flag
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https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.cnbc.com/amp/2020/06/14/nyc-private-schools-prep-for-enrollment-decline-amid-covid-19.html [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:07 PM Flag
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We are at a 2T/3T/I don't know. Some people are leaving; some people are applying. My guess is we will be net down in numbers. But the school has no debt and no mortgage and seems to be fine. No layoffs. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:04 PM Flag
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I think the issue is not so much the tier of the school, but rather the layout of the school. Poly Prep and Dwight Engelwood, for example, are not TT, but they are close to Manhattan and have campuses. They are going to have a much easier time doing in-person instruction than, say, CGPS, which is similar to those schools in terms of its selectiveness, but has a lot very small spaces in their buildings and no real outdoor space. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:12 PM Flag
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Actually, I can't speak for middle and upper school at CGPS, but my kid is in the lower school, and they have the space and the staff to split all the classes in half. The staff thing sort of matters too; fortunately the grammar school has two co-teachers in each class. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 09:10 PM Flag
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At a 2T school (I think). A lot of movement in and out but net numbers are not very different. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:33 PM Flag
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Which one? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 09:38 PM Flag
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I don't even know which tier my school is in. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 09:08 PM Flag
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We can tell you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 09:37 PM Flag
[ - ] Would anyone happen to know if the restrooms in Grand Central Terminal are open? I know, they are disgusting. But I'm returning to work in NYC in a few weeks and would like to know my bathroom options. Thank you in advance!! 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 05:58 PM Flag
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I don't know if they are open, but they are nowhere near as disgusting as they were, say, back in the 90's. Honestly, I think they have been pretty much fine. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:01 PM Flag
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They haven't been gross for at least 10 years. I don't know about those in particular, but I know the ones in central park are open. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:13 PM Flag
[ - ] Anyone else cleaning out stuff after being cooped up at home for several months? DH went crazy and made 12 fresh direct bags of giveaway items this weekend (kids old backpacks, 2 of the 4 baseball bats we have, spare bike pumps, clothes, everything we never use). It seems extreme, but he wants to live leaner with less clutter. I view it as stuff we are saving for a future possible need. 27 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 05:56 PM Flag
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He is right. We don;'t need any of this crap. I did this when we last moved and have not missed a thing. Somehow there's always a bag or baseball bat or bike pump around even after the purge. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:04 PM Flag
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OP - we have 3 bike pumps. He says we need 1. I said what if it breaks. He says we will buy a new one. I say that's a waste of money. He is very transactional, and says that clutter destroys 5,000 dollars of happiness for him each year, and he is fine to spend a few hundred each year buying stuff he needs instead of storing closets full of backup stuff. I see his point, but can't he just deal? He wasnt like this before the lockdown. It seems compulsive. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:09 PM Flag
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Does it feel like clutter? If there's an organized place for the pump you use and the backup pump, that seems reasonable. But if they're just tossed on a garage shelf amid a bunch of other stuff and you can't access them easily when you need to, then it feels burdensome. Maybe there's a middle ground here? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:21 PM Flag
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NP: This sounds like things here. We have so much back up that it keeps me from enjoying what we have. There are people out there who can use your things now, which is less wasteful in the big picture. What percentage of these old things will you really ever use? You seem more compulsive than he does. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:21 PM Flag
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He's right. Try to see it this way : you pay rent/mortgage/utilities to accomodate trash [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:34 PM Flag
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He's right. You have to weigh risk/benefit. How likely is it that a bike pump will break? Not likely. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:38 PM Flag
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I totally agree. And we have kept so many things "just in case" only to forget that we have them, or not remembered where they are when we need them, so that we ended up buying a new thing anyway. My DH is the hoarder of "just in case" items and I am always the advocate for tossing things. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:02 PM Flag
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Sounds like my husband and we have the same dynamic. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 09:15 PM Flag
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Why do you have 3 bike pumps? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 11:44 PM Flag
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OP - easy - imagine every trip where you forgot a bike pump. That's how we got the extra 2. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 11:45 PM Flag
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We moved to my in laws in March with 4 suitcases and 4 backpacks, and our computers. And one bag of sports gear. We did need things like bikes, but beyond that, we DO NOT MISS ANY OF OUR CRAP from our co-op. Throw it all out. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:10 PM Flag
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we did the same. rented some bikes, bought some helmets and running shoes. We are heading back to the apartment next week and I can't wait to purge. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 10:01 PM Flag
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We aren't all-in on Marie Kondo, but DH and I adopted a live leaner - but with nicer stuff - approach 10 years ago. Nicer apartment, a bit smaller, but higher end. I got rid of lots of my clothes, shoes and bags, and he did the same. We got rid of old pots and pans and dishes and mugs. And old electronics, HDMI cables, and the like. We kept meaningful items. Everything else we cut by 50% in quantity, and upgraded across the board. We are so much more content at home now. It's like being in a personalized luxury residence. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:27 PM Flag
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so sensible [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:59 PM Flag
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I love and appreciate this so much. I aspire to be just like you! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 09:54 PM Flag
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To me, the key was the **upgrade** - everything we got was nicer than what we had before. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 11:28 PM Flag
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There was a recent article on this. About how minimalism doesn't work in a pandemic. For the first time, I find myself buying things when normally I hate accumulation. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:58 PM Flag
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I disagree. We have hoarded scarce and critical items (meat in freezer, cleaners, gloves), but literally ditched 15 moving boxes of useless items. One box was just AV cables and extension cords from 1995 to today. We also sent a box of photos to get digitized - came back on CDs. So nice. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:39 PM Flag
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I need to do this. What service did you use? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.20, 10:51 AM Flag
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I've been combing through duplicates and unused things and am very ready toss nearly everything. Things that were ugly, broken or unloved in February are still ugly, broken and unloved today. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:10 PM Flag
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We have 2 rice cookers, 2 vacuum cleaners, 9 rolls of partially used wrapping paper, 6 old winter coats, and 2 step ladders clogging up our entryway closet and shelves. We even have bulbs that fit no fixtures we currently own! I feel sad whenever I open it. I wish we had one nicely stored vacuum, one rice cooker, one new modern step ladder, and 2 stylish coats in the closet. But I cannot muster the will to do it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 11:32 PM Flag
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My ex kept everything. So much went into storage. He often couldn't find items in the storage we paid dearly for and would just go out and buy another - which eventually went into storage as well when item wasn't needed. I finally cut this hoarding parasite out of my life. It was a stupid way of life. I only buy what I need and know exactly where it is. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:35 PM Flag
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Are there places taking donations now in NYC? There is a nearby donation bin but it's been boarded up since the pandemic hit. I don't know if they are concerned about virus being on items or if there's nobody working at the organization now to handle the donation. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:43 PM Flag
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https://www.goodwill.org/covid-19-frequently-asked-questions-faq/ [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 09:27 PM Flag
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We paid 225 - 250 per month for 8 years!!! of storage, and gave it all away last year. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 09:28 PM Flag
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No, I'm busy with increased cooking and cleaning loads with everyone at home and we've been out of town most weekends recently. Will get to it eventually as it appears we will be in quarantine off and on for the next year... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 11:10 PM Flag
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The makings of a hoarder. Take it from a kindred soul, you will never really need those things. And as dh tells me, if you really did need an item, you deserve a new one. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 11:17 PM Flag
[ - ] I have a rising 6th grader and am seriously thinking of homeschooling. Usually in Manhattan but now in suburbs. Any thoughts on forming a “co-op” for home schooling via zoom, etc? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 05:54 PM Flag
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Look at options online. There are coops already set up depending on where you are living. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 05:58 PM Flag
[ - ] When all is said and done, how much do you think property values will go down in Manhattan? we bought in the early 2000s and since then our property value has more than doubled. 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 05:23 PM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 05:27 PM Flag
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op: I feel stuck. My kids are high school and middle school and it feels unfair to uproot them now for outdoor space which they don't care about. But I am scared we will be saddled with an apt in a co-op that we won't be able to sell in a year. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 05:31 PM Flag
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why do you want to sell in a year? Things will get better after that [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 05:32 PM Flag
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222 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 05:56 PM Flag
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I think it will be many years before prices reach back to pre covid levels but pre covid levels were absolute bs. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 05:28 PM Flag
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I just sold my place at a loss in CT but so happy to be rid of it. I feel the economy is going to be vastly different next year. Rather have cash in hand. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:20 PM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:23 PM Flag
[ - ] How are all of you handling this? 13 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 05:18 PM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 05:20 PM Flag
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Do you have children? If so ages? And are you both WFH? Cuz I really can't imagine how we'd swing this with our life right now. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:14 PM Flag
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:21 PM Flag
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Handling what? There is so much going on that you need to be specific [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 05:25 PM Flag
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not great. the kid school thing is BAD. and the economy/ unemployment thing is also bad. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 05:28 PM Flag
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Not great: unemployed, watching more people die than died in combat during World War I, watching national monuments being destroyed without regard to the nature of the monument. Depressed and losing weight. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 05:43 PM Flag
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yeah covid, unemployment, people tearing down statues of racists. those are all equally traumatic. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:35 PM Flag
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kind of a blanket statement. not all the statues being defaced are worthy of it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:40 PM Flag
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People destroying our history is traumatic. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 09:03 PM Flag
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Personally, not bad. Kids are grown/out of the house, and I can easily work from home. I am just very worried about the world at large. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:00 PM Flag
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Pretty bad. Sabotaging everything good that's left like an idiot. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:22 PM Flag
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I'm baking and eating too much [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 09:30 PM Flag
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Running every other day and long walks (with my mask) and wine or beer on the terrace at sundown. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 09:49 PM Flag
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