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Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] Has anyone given birth of have a df who has delivered recently? I’m wondering whether they are actually screening/ testing pregnant women before delivery. 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:54 AM Flag
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I cannot imagine they would have stopped [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:57 AM Flag
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Op: I hadn’t heard what they have been doing either way. Do they test close to the due date or are there rapid tests when you go in? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:58 AM Flag
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It depends on the hospital. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 04:01 AM Flag
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Seems like an obvious yes. Are you hoping for a different answer? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:32 PM Flag
[ - ] With coronavirus increasing everywhere else it seems like just a matter of time until NYC cases spike again. Wondering if now is the time to go to dentist and haircut etc. Probably better now than three months from now. And there will always be some risk. But still scary. 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:53 AM Flag
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I think that is sound logic. We didn’t have many cases where I am so we things reopened I figured that was a sweet spot to go out. Now that cases are spiking I’m back inside. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:56 AM Flag
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I am starting to restock my supplies now. I did a couple big Costco runs before and early stages in NYC. I attempted to go to a Costco in May, saw the situation, and didn’t go in. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 03:46 AM Flag
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as soon as they reopen is the Safest time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 04:02 AM Flag
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Got my haircut and color done as soon as the salon opened. Now is the time. Hoping to get one more run in in Sep before everything shuts down again. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:57 PM Flag
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My whole family had their hair cut last week. I had hi-lights done (nyc). Every place had a lot of safety protocols in place. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:20 PM Flag
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In CT and got my hair highlighted early June, trying to do doctor's appts and stuff now since cases are very low here. Also keep in mind that the massive outbreaks have not occurred from hair salons and dentists. It's been from bars and parties. In fact, that Great Clips in Missouri with a symptomatic stylist who exposed over 100 people resulted in zero other infections because of masks. If your salon requires masks, I think it's pretty safe. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 03:21 PM Flag
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Just got hair cut, I agree. Skipping dentist for now. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 03:52 PM Flag
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Was just at the pediatrician today and she suggested we all go to the dentist now when things are relatively calm. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 03:54 PM Flag
[ - ] Are black eyeglass frames too hard to wear unless you’re gorgeous? I love the look but am 1) not gorgeous and 2) getting older. Though I often see older women in them (silver hair etc) and think they look so striking. 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:47 AM Flag
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^^^ getting older meaning I feel like they are more harsh and could highlight wrinkles [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:49 AM Flag
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If you like them, wear them. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 03:47 AM Flag
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It depends more on your features and skin tone. If you have soft features go for it. I have a prominent nose and black frames are a no go for me but I love them too [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 11:24 AM Flag
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Last time I picked frames, I went to a local shop and tried on a bunch, took selfies wearing my favorite styles. Then later I looked at the pics and compared. I am mid-50s and ended up going with frameless Silhouettes. I still want to get a pair with heavy dark frames but just as a second pair. I like the style but feel that on me, they’re less flattering than the rimless. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 11:32 AM Flag
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I think they can work for everyone - "traditionally" attractive people look great in them, and they give less objectively/traditionally attractive faces (like my own!) more character. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:16 PM Flag
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I tend to wear tortoise shell because it suits me better than black, however, just for fun, I got a pair of black cat-eye blue light glasses and I get compliments every single time I wear them. I am not gorgeous. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:31 PM Flag
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Warby Parker has a feature where you can try them on virtually. It uses your iPhone camera. Works really well. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:58 PM Flag
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Are they still doing try on at home during COVID? For me it is more about fit and comfort even if it "looks" good. I had to try three different similar-looking styles to find the one that fit comfortably. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:03 PM Flag
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Some of their frames. Not all. I just did online thing but I had an almost identical frame in the past. Figured can return it (regular return policy) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:50 PM Flag
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My mom has white hair and wears big Iris Apfel-type black glasses. I'm not sure what counts as "gorgeous," but I think it's more a matter of style and confidence. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:33 PM Flag
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This! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 03:29 PM Flag
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That sounds so chic and totally what I aspire to as an older woman. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:39 PM Flag
[ - ] Considering leasing a car. What do I need to know? Never leased one. We owned in the past (once) and selling it was a major PITA hence considering leasing. TYIA 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:16 AM Flag
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Just leased one. The rates are super low. Try to find the exact same model in 3-4 different dealerships and ask them to give you a lease quote without any add-ons. Pick the top two and have them compete for your business. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:22 AM Flag
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Worked for me when I was nervous about buying bec of inexperience and 20 yrs of living in NYC [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 05:49 AM Flag
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We just leased a car for the first time. I wasn't aware just how negotiable the lease is. Don't be afraid to ask for a lower rate and do your homework before going to the dealership. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 03:56 PM Flag
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What do you mean by "homework"? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 09:39 PM Flag
[ - ] I had a conversation today with both our private school and with our neighbor who is a public school teacher in new york. Takeaway from both: preference for and data supporting max in person possible. 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:13 AM Flag
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This is backed by data, esp for elementary school ages. The remaining variables are the effect of a potential uptick over the course of the summer and how effectively schools can adjust to the guidelines laid out by state gvmt. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:22 AM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:27 AM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:28 AM Flag
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EYE ROLL [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:29 AM Flag
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Of course that is the preference. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 04:16 AM Flag
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Fwiw, Texas teachers, who are not allowed to strike by law there, are looking at striking over this issue. They are also considering a massive "sick out" where teachers coordinate several days of no work by calling in sick. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:39 PM Flag
[ - ] I have wfh dressing fatigue. Someone send me outfit ideas? I want to feel like I'm trying but also be relatively comfy. 17 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:41 AM Flag
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I wear jeans and sneakers (instead of sweats/slippers), a bra (!), a comfy tee that would look good enough for Zoom, and my heavy watch, rings and earrings. I add a cardigan or sometimes a fleece if needed. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:43 AM Flag
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In summer? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:57 AM Flag
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Yes, since we have the A/C on. And I don't have many video calls. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:01 AM Flag
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I call that American wastefulness. Only in the US of A, smh. Don't blast the AC and wear less layers for goodness sake. The environment will thank you. And so will your bank account. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 03:46 AM Flag
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np. Haha, this! I clearly remember DH blasting the AC because he was too lazy to take off his hoodie. WTH? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:25 PM Flag
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OR: wow, people on this site can be so unkind. For the record, I hate A/C and would never use it under 90 degrees or so. Unfortunately I live in a small apartment with three other people and they do not share my feelings. DH and both of my kids get truly uncomfortable once the temp is in the high 70s. They have been all-stars about existing in a small space in which case I am doing a ton of work with phone calls, etc. We do A/C and I wear a sweater. For the record are carbon foot print is otherwise incredibly small relative to just about everyone we know. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:06 PM Flag
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^our, not are [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:06 PM Flag
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But do they turn on the A/C because they don't want to take off their fleece hoodie? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:35 PM Flag
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They all wear shorts and t-shirts. I wear jeans and a sweater or fleece. Even without A/C I tend to wear jeans and a fleece up until at least 74 degrees or so. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:40 PM Flag
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+1 I'm always cold. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 09:01 PM Flag
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what kind of watch? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 04:54 AM Flag
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i wear flowy summer dresses now, makes me feel a bit more like human [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:49 AM Flag
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Dickies' jumpsuit and sneakers. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:00 AM Flag
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google "loungewear" and go wild. It's my new favy clothing category. You can find cute stuff that makes you feel put together but it's comfy and cute. I have short sets since it's waist up only but also pants sets. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:13 AM Flag
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I just throw a blazer over my leggings/t-shirt or sundress. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:30 AM Flag
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Do you need to be somewhat presentable? I like to wear flowy midi-skirts, they are so comfortable. I pair with simple v-neck tshirt and can dress up with jewelry. If needed, you can wear a shirt or blouse. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:42 AM Flag
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love these ideas.. I've been wearing a lot of workout sets on days I don't have calls, but think I need to transition to skits and a tee. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 03:25 AM Flag
[ - ] Has anyone heard specifics from their private school? We are new for HS and have heard little to nothing. I'm curious what the plans are. We are at an all girls. 75 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:17 AM Flag
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Our school sends weekly email updates. Their architect and maintenance team surveyed the school and with distancing requirements, they already know that they can not fit all kids. So even in the best case scenario there will be a hybrid system where kids will rotate in. They already said they will not convert outdoor spaces for classrooms. They discussed how lunch might work. No parents and caregivers are allowed inside school. They seem to be trying hard to help the kids "meet" each other with Zoom calls. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:37 AM Flag
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Oh no...we are new so haven't been included on any emails or updates. Really upsetting. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:40 AM Flag
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we are a new family too and have been included in the emails [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:44 AM Flag
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really!? I will email our school tomorrow. Absolutely have heard nothing. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:47 AM Flag
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Teachers union has said they flatly refuse to teach in person until vaccine. But privates are not UFT [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:48 AM Flag
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what is uft? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:49 AM Flag
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United Federation Teachers [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:56 AM Flag
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This is just not true. What do you have to gain from lying about this, on a post that isn't even about public schools? The union has set conditions for the safety measures needed for a return to school, and a vaccine is not one of them. https://www.uft.org/news/opinion/teachers-will-return-fall-if [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 11:23 AM Flag
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Maybe the emails are going to dh? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:55 PM Flag
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same here. My new school has VERY small class size, so I'm hoping they can make it work. But so far all we've heard is that they've purchased masks, cleaning supplies, etc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:47 AM Flag
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SS TT no firm decision yet they are still working on three scenarios- all remote, all in person, all hybrid [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:46 AM Flag
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^^ sorry, meant to reply to OP [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:47 AM Flag
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So lots of communication from your school or not? Daughter going to SS TT and literally, not one email. Have a buddy family but they are overseas so have met briefly one time. Have no idea what's going on. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:52 AM Flag
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Which school? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 10:53 PM Flag
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we are at a k-8 catholic. Know nothing at all from them. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:12 AM Flag
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Meant to reply to OP. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:12 AM Flag
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Which K-8 catholic? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 10:53 PM Flag
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Is this a private school? Why won't they convert outdoor spaces? That seems inefficient. Zoom socializing stinks. It will be hybrid. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:54 PM Flag
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Which school is this? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 03:26 PM Flag
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Which school is this? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 10:52 PM Flag
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My DD TT said that they are likely to be remote for the entire 2020 2021 school year. They hope there is a vaccine by August 2021 so they can return to school. Many families have moved away from Manhattan so remote works for them. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:45 AM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:45 AM Flag
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what!? Are you kidding me!! Next year remote. All year. I can't imagine that would happen. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:48 AM Flag
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Teachers do not want to get virus. why R u surprised? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:56 AM Flag
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Because I work and can't continue like it has been. Kids need friends and interactions. Because the schools haven't said anything including no school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:59 AM Flag
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Is this Trinity? I hope ours can provide a hybrid model. There are absolutely no guarantees that there will be a vaccine in a year. I think schools need to plan accordingly. Use some of the endowment money to rent extra space, etc... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:04 AM Flag
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THIS. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:56 PM Flag
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And what if there's no vaccine in 2021? How long will you suckers pay $50k for Zoom? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:12 AM Flag
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One more year only for us. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:16 AM Flag
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I can see why a TT school where many families are in country houses, have SAHMs and all have sufficient access to technology, would stay remote. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 10:35 AM Flag
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No way. We are in a TT school and everyone wants to go back. Even with what you describe above, people do not want to be remote schooling their own children all day and people think kids need the interaction. I think it's very disappointing that a school with resources (which all the TT schools have) would make this decision. I'm not sure this is real. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 12:05 PM Flag
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Those SAHM don't want to stay remote. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:56 PM Flag
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All of the schools have kids on FA. So, they are just expected to zoom from city apts? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:13 PM Flag
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Gasp. People will see that they live in a CITY APARTMENT?? Sorry, I agree Zoom school isn't ideal, but I don't really see what your point is here. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 09:15 PM Flag
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Weird, Brearley has said the opposite. Which school? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 10:30 PM Flag
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What did Brearley say? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 10:54 PM Flag
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Likely in person. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.20, 01:14 AM Flag
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Which school is this? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 10:53 PM Flag
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Fake. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.20, 01:15 AM Flag
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maybe can we list what you've heard from a specific school? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:54 AM Flag
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Yes, please name the school! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:07 PM Flag
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Brooklyn private floating several possible models, most likely will be full in-person for younger kids and hybrid for grades 6+. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:56 AM Flag
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that would be great. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:59 AM Flag
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I agree, even though one of my kids is older and it would suck for them. However I also think this model isn’t likely to last through the whole school year, perhaps until thanksgiving, then they’ll be remote again for a while, sadly. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 10:34 AM Flag
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If the rest of the country would just wear masks and social distance, then we wouldn't have to go remote again! So annoying. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:57 PM Flag
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We're at the same school. The plan makes a lot of sense, but I worry because of the overall numbers in NYC it's not going to happen. Lots of faculty kids at the school so it may be easier for a lot of them to go back. I don't know how the teachers with kids are doing it -- must be so incredibly hard. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.20, 01:41 AM Flag
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DC is starting K at TT. We were told in school, young grades prioritized. School has enough space for everybody. Obviously everything is tentative but that's the plan [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:05 AM Flag
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We have a 1st grader at a k-8 and that's thr plan for his school too. Daughter starying 9th. Will ask school to add us to emails tomorrow. So odd they havent. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:11 AM Flag
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I really don't understand why younger kids are prioritized. Okay, I get that they can't take instruction well online for long periods and can't be left home alone, but they are also less able to socially distance, keep from touching their faces, etc. Middle and high school age kids shouldn't be left home alone and taught virtually as a substitute if it isn't working for them, and it isn't working for so many of them. I have younger and older kids and feel like the older ones suffered with remote learning more. I know I am not in the minority either. I wish the schools would at least consider offering daycare for younger kids offsite, if school cannot be offered or more space cannot be secured, so that middle and high school kids can have some in person discussion, science labs, studio art, college counseling, social interaction, etc in person also. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 03:44 AM Flag
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I agree. I have both ages too and my oldernis becoming more introverted and basically, looked up her work online and did thr minimum needed. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 09:41 AM Flag
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Mine was like this but became increasingly anxious also. A close friend's DC retreated a lot and hid a dangerous substance use disorder, and two kids we know developed eating disorders in response to weight gain, possibly in response to sports cancellations and gyms being closed. Social media has allowed some friendships to be maintained, but it has also amplified so many issues! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 05:05 PM Flag
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I agree. Each age group has it's own issues. I think the schools know they are unlikely to lose high school students, but lower school families may just pack up and move out of the city if there is only remote school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:59 PM Flag
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Well, if this is a main reason, the school has a ton of faith that the students will launch well and do well at college and beyond. I know kids from several coveted NYC prep schools who have dropped out of colleges already or are burned out before they even arrive. It's not like remote learning from home was some fun, relaxing gap semester experience.. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 05:07 PM Flag
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OR- Iagree, I'm just trying to make sense of this. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:28 PM Flag
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Another way to view it is this. Families that are full pay and connected have a fair enough shot of getting into great schools no matter what and really don't need the connections private schools provide. It comes down to the experience. If kids feel passed over or feel their needs aren't met throughout this time, who knows. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:58 PM Flag
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^ there should be incentive to keep these students as engaged as possible now. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:59 PM Flag
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OR - I’m all for opening schools for everybody (I have a rising kindergartener) and I get it it’s not ideal for MS and HS. But I think those grades can tolerate some alternative form - alternate days, am/pm shifts, different location (is empty office building). You can’t do that with k-3. That said I think schools can be prioritized over everything else. I can go on without bar restaurant and nail salon. But the kids need to get back ASAP for academic social mental and other reasons. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:01 PM Flag
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PP here, and I agree that schools will ideally be accessible to all students. Mostly there needs to be creative ways to approach school reopening, just as business reopenings needed various approaches. I just don't think it's right to prioritize younger vs older students. Kids in HS, for example, are losing motivation and feel uncertain about the future, so if privates think about their longer term goals, I hope they consider how students will navigate college and beyond. So many we know are feeling lost about how to apply to college, whether they will truly be ready since they aren't learning well online, and what they want from the future. Others can say these kids aren't resilient or gritty enough, but it's really tough for them to watch their friends need to relocate, know that parents have become unemployed, or know that family members or friends' family members have died. Younger kids have a longer time to catch up on any lost skills that in person school provides. Teens we know have little perspective to rely on, so parents/grandparents telling them about wartime interruption or past plagues just make the world sound unstable. My DCs attend a school that has a separate campus for younger and older kids, and I haven't heard that the younger kids will be taking over the campuses, but doing something like that, or equivalently taking priority over the school site, wouldn't make any sense to me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 04:50 PM Flag
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THIS. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 05:00 PM Flag
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I am very alarmed by the attitude of many bright students who feel anxious about going forward. Kids are considering leaving their universities in freshman year, trying to take a gap year to ride this out at home (with nothing to do!), and HS juniors and seniors seem less interested in going at all. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 05:49 PM Flag
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Younger kids need so much support, and it's not an issue of who has it harder as a parent or teacher or who is more important, but I do think the way people are viewing risk and reward need consideration. Let's say you want to have kids in person in a class and believe social distancing, hand washing, and PPE are essential in ensuring safety for all. Both older and younger kids will touch things, rely on various modes of transportation, and have risks from home/commute/outside/others. Younger kids require more supervision and different ratios to ensure safety measures on campus, because they are still learning about body awareness and space, still grab, bump into things, and ask for adult help bc they need it, plus can be a bit impulsive. It would make more sense to penalize an older student who cannot follow hygiene rules, but younger kids might be better served w reminders and redirection depending on developmental stage. Younger kids learn as much from unstructured play time/recess, PE, art class, lunch time as instructional times. Can they really gauge relative velocity well? No, so how would free play and games look? Older kids need to interact and socialize but can do so in a contained class while having a discussion. It's a bit like daycare ratios. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:06 PM Flag
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My kids school also has a high school campus that is separate and it will actually be easier in some respects to distance the kids in lower school per CDC guidelines then the high school kids. First off, the lower school as a consistent lower student to teach ratio then the upper school. No lower school class has a higher ratio then 8:1 (2 teachers and 16 kids), but some of the high school classes are as high as 22:1. Then there is the fact that the LS kids don't actually NEED extra rooms like the art or music rooms. They can easily turn those spaces into extra classrooms. But if the point of HS kids going to school is so they can use the chem lab or the art studio, then those "extra" rooms can't be repurposed to social distance. And lower school classes stay together all day so you can have the same group of 7-8 kids together all day in one classroom with no direct contact with other students. HS students all have their own unique schedules and move around the building much more. Our school is hoping to have LS kids in every day but they will stay in their classroom and the classes will take turns on the playground after cleanings between each class. MS and HS kids come in every other day and would have a little more freedom to move around the building to classrooms set up for specific subjects. So the LS kids might be going to school everyday, but they won't be using the HS campus or having priority, it is just that the older and younger kids have different needs. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:17 PM Flag
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These are great points. I do think parents of LS students will want the art, music, and movement rooms to be open though, unless those can be moved to each classroom. I wonder if there is a way for kids to have a more stable "classroom" even in MS or US/high school. Sometimes I try to imagine if a course can be taught simultaneously for regular and honors, but differentiated by additional assignments, different tests, or different online work. The core lectures and discussion would not be differentiated, which might have added benefits in terms of diverse perspectives and highlighting different types/scales of intelligence. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 06:40 PM Flag
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I think the issue in private schools is not so much regular vs honors. My dc had to choose from 6 English classes and 4 science classes for next year. Then, math is leveled and they offer 6 or 7 languages... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 07:49 PM Flag
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Given the pandemic, I think it's justifiable to assign one of several top choices for English or science if simplifying schedules promotes more in person instruction or reduces risk of infection. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:56 PM Flag
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PP - On the LS rooms, sure, we would all like school to be as normal as possible, but I think this is something most people can live with. The school plans on the specials teachers going to each class to teach, so the kids would still have art, but just in their classroom. I went to a private school in a flyover. My school demolished and rebuilt one of our buildings one year so all of our "specials" classes had to be moved into the classrooms. For example, the art teacher had her "art cart" which she rolled in to each class with supplies. It was fine. I barely remember it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 10:11 PM Flag
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This can be risky if someone becomes infected though. The entire classroom needs a deep clean, and everyone in class is likely at risk of infection. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 08:57 PM Flag
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Which school is this? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 10:54 PM Flag
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Why are comments being removed? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:34 AM Flag
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I saw some removed earlier but now they're back. Weird. Is there a mod algorithm that's going rogue? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 11:03 AM Flag
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They all came back. Very weird. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.20, 02:02 AM Flag
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Can people please name their schools? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:51 PM Flag
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This. Why would someone be secretive? There is zero chance you'd be outed by naming the school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 10:31 PM Flag
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exactly. Should we just list schools and see what people have heard? Even if just "back full time", "back parttime:? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.20, 02:03 AM Flag
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yES PLEASE! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.20, 12:34 PM Flag
[ - ] Can someone tell me what the ranking of Brooklyn private schools is from most academic to least? St. Ann's and then how do Poly Prep, Berekely Caroll, Brooklyn Friends, etc. rank? 23 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:01 AM Flag
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St Ann’s clearly above the rest. Then packer. Then poly prep and Berkeley Carroll. Then bk friends. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:12 AM Flag
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Thank you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:29 AM Flag
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SA different than the rest though. Different philosophy and focus. Not as strong in math and science; very creative; tons of arts, reading, poetry; very progressive. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 03:09 AM Flag
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OR. At least that's what I have heard from families at the school. It's an amazing place for the right kid and has strong college placements. It's a different school from the Manhattan TTs, and different yet from Poly etc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 03:11 AM Flag
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That’s basically a myth that’s been around for 50+ years. I have 3 kids in the school and the sciences and maths are excellent and high-level. It is not nearly as “progressive” as its reputation- the progressive element is that upper middle and high schoolers can choose elements of their own focus, but the lower grades are very teacher led and quite traditional. The exception is that they put more of an emphasis on the arts, and considered them as important as other academic subjects from the beginning. Children with strong intellects, who are creative and who are self-motivated do well there. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 10:33 AM Flag
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Well, they don't get grades either, right? What about tests? It's very progressive compared to a traditional school like Poly. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:00 PM Flag
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No grades. They do have pretty serious assessments and evaluations and they have tests starting in 4th grade (occasionally earlier for spelling). It’s progressive in those ways, yes, and not a lot of rote learning, but it’s not Montessori or child led or “relaxed” by any means. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:53 PM Flag
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OP: But I don't think progressive means non-academic. Some progressive schools are academic (St. Ann's, Fieldston) and others are not (Calhoun). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:55 PM Flag
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These schools all feel so different. You might like one school more than another even if it's less academic [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:40 AM Flag
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SA, Packer, PP, BFS, BC [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:56 AM Flag
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What does “least academic” mean? Serious q. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:30 AM Flag
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Curriculum offers highest level courses, for example multi-variable calculus. School is selective and takes kids who are ambitious in taking high level courses. College placement results reflect academic excellence. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:36 AM Flag
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Thank you for the helpful answer. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:56 AM Flag
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Serious Q: Do you really not understand the difference between a school like Harvard or MIT and a school like Arizona State? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:40 AM Flag
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I don’t know why anyone at all would pay for Arizona State so I guess I would be surprised if UB moms paid for that for K-12. But I guess if you insist on going private at all costs then some end up there. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:55 AM Flag
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np. We are public all the way, but one of my kids needs a really academic school, the other one much more supportive and slow-paced. I can see how families who can afford private may choose a less rigorous school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:33 PM Flag
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OP: Absolutely, me too. It happens to not be what we are looking for right now, but I definitely understand it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:24 PM Flag
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It means that a lot of the student body will be kids who couldn't get into the more prestigious privates and for whom the selective publics are not an option. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:48 PM Flag
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St. Ann’s, Poly, Packer, BC, BF. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:54 AM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 03:33 AM Flag
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Poly ahead of Packer? I always thought Packer was nearly the same as St A's in terms of academics but a different parent crowd (St A's = old money, artsy vs Packer - finance). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:19 PM Flag
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Traditionally people say Poly and BC are below Packer and St. Ann's. That said, this is changing fast. College admissions for Poly and BC are improving quickly and many parents prefer these schools to Packer or St. Ann's now for other reasons. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:02 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:18 PM Flag
[ - ] I just yelled at my parents who are in their 90s. I feel awful. My mother was insulting my sister’s husband to my father and I just snapped. She is constantly negative about our husbands and the choices we made. It makes me feel bad. The words don’t just go away. 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:00 AM Flag
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She deserved it [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:04 AM Flag
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Wow! What a terrible thing to say about someone who is in her 90s [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:47 AM Flag
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Really? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:13 AM Flag
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Are you the same type of person who excuses racism and sexism in old people? They still have to answer for their actions [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:31 AM Flag
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? She's fine to insult someone but too old to be chastised for it? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 03:37 AM Flag
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How does someone become immune from repercussions because they’re old? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 03:51 AM Flag
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I am sorry. Has your mom always been like this or has she lost her filter? My mother is either miserably rude or OTT fake and lovey but has always been like this. She is only 74 but loosing her grip a bit and less censored. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:14 AM Flag
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Always been like this. And it has become worse. She’s really loving in many ways. But I’m so many ways it feels like it’s all about her. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:34 AM Flag
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I feel sorry for your dad. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:50 AM Flag
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Hi OP, I feel for you. It doesn't matter what age they are, they need to realize the impact of their words and actions. My parents are in their early 80's and I snapped at them a few years ago. I had taken a week off work to travel to Europe to visit them and I had to go through a week of bickering between them, business as usual and no acknowledgement of my presence or my efforts to come visit them. Dinner before my departure I just lost it, I yelled so hard that I had a broken voice for 3 days and I almost tipped the table over with plates and all. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:17 AM Flag
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It was the last straw after years and years of us making so many sacrifices to go visit them every summer with kids and all and walking into a shit show every single time. After my return to the US we adopted a puppy and stopped flying overseas as a family. I visit them once a year still but they haven't seen the rest of the family since. That's just the way it has to be. As you can see your post struck a nerve! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:19 AM Flag
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Being a mom and older doesn't automatically make you a good or loving person. Sounds like she's always been pretty awful and no one has ever really called her on it, probably long past due. My relationship with my mom improved when I started standing up for myself. Now she tells my sibling she thinks I don't like her, and bends over backwards being nice and thanking me when I do things for her. Nice change from always being told I'm not a nice person and she doesn't like me. :-) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:40 PM Flag
[ - ] Went to a mall in CT to return a few online purchases. Felt weird, pointless, and dangerous. I'll be working from home until December and feel like I'll never want to buy clothes or wear high heels again. 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 12:09 AM Flag
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Same. No reason to try to look good or spend the $ with no one to see. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:32 AM Flag
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What felt dangerous? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:35 AM Flag
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ITA! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:34 PM Flag
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As I pulled on my faded blue jumpsuit this morning, I was comforted by the fact that nobody is going to see me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:47 PM Flag
[ - ] Please! I need to know how to cure my son's negative litany. He criticizes ev-er-y-thing. Tonight he criticized the Simpsons as only being ha ha funny, not laugh out loud funny, the pasta being too peppery, everything! He had a playdate and I could tell he was boring his rather upbeat friend with his tirades about the teachers and Fortnite. Truth be told, he gets it from his father, me and my mother. I've consciously stopped complaining but how do I turn it around for him? 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.30.20, 11:57 PM Flag
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I think you have to treat it like dog training -- praise and reward anything he does that you approve of, and ignore/remove attention from any behavior you want to stop. So, if he says something nice about anyone or anything, you notice it and tell him and how happy you are to hear him say that. If he complains, you just ignore and walk away. Don't engage. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 12:18 AM Flag
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1. The simpsons havent been funny in a long time. Your kid is probably brighter than his age group so getting bored more easily. 2. Cut all internet since its just a huge pool of negativity. Instead buy anything he needs for productive interests. Baseball bat, guitar, electronics set, summer camp, whatever that is not video games, internet or tv. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 12:43 AM Flag
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You are right. It has been 2 weeks straight of this. Next three weeks we will be traveling and he has a camp. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:11 AM Flag
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Tell him nobody likes a complainer. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 12:58 AM Flag
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I say this constantly. I tell him how he is setting negative grooves in his brain. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:12 AM Flag
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Have him do some cognitive behavioral therapy to rewire his neural pathways (or whatever!). And he should change is habits/schedule if life is so boring to him. He should create a new daily schedule and lose certain things that he doesn't like and add a few things that will get him out of his mental rut. I highly recommend sleeping with the shades open to wake with the sun (or sleeping outside on balcony or in yard) and going for a long early morning walk if possible. Reframes one's thinking for the whole day. I also highly recommend camping. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:39 AM Flag
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That's so odd. I've heard sleeping in a dark room is important. I've never heard to wake with the sun. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 01:48 AM Flag
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It's natural. The trick is to start really winding down when the sun goes down and preferably no blue light (TV, phone) thereafter. Can work or read by yellow light for a bit but should turn in by 10ish and the get up by 6ish. We are happier this way. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:00 AM Flag
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maybe be honest with him and tell him that it gets really tiring to be around and that it’s not a trait you’re proud of in yourself. If you have an example of a time when it caused problems for you, tell him about it. I feel like this is sort of a common thing and people think they’re being quirky or funny but it does get old [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 03:34 AM Flag
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Point out the behavior you’ve noticed, tell him that you realize that you also do it and that it’s not a positive equality. That finding fault w everything steals joy and nobody wants to hear it. Also, If he complains about everything, you don’t know when there is something really wrong. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 03:56 AM Flag
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model positive behavior and try to either praise things, or say nothing. At first it will be strange and feel fake, but after a while, it will come more naturally. You could say, "ah, I put too much pepper in this pasta. Next time I'll know better, but I'm glad the noodles turned out al dente" etc. It will take a while. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 05:34 AM Flag
[ - ] Anyone having trouble WFH w/ DH around? I've learned I have a "work persona." I'm a senior leader with a large team. I'm effective in my job for a reason - I get sh*t done. I get in my zone. DH likes to talk...ask me one off questions in the middle of meeting , asking me to mute so I can tell him where some food item is in the freezer for example). He likes to chit chat when I'm not in a meeting (rarely) but am having quiet time trying to reply to a million emails and such. He says I can sometimes be direct/short/transactional. I'm never rude, but it's been really hard for me to play lovely dovey wife adding "honey, babe, or sweetie" onto my replies. Sometimes I'm just moving fast and trying to get him his answer. His feelings end up being hurt at least 2x a week because I think he's just not used to this side of me. Anyone else struggling managing the marriage dynamic while WFH? 39 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.30.20, 11:53 PM Flag
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Can you have a sectioned of area to work during the day? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.20, 11:59 PM Flag
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Op: Still working on that. Right now I do have a nook in the corner of the house. I do think I'm going to have to get more drastic and move to a bedroom that's not ours. I think I have to be out of sight for him to recognize that I'm simply unavailable to him. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 12:24 AM Flag
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My husband goes in to a small tv room that is his office by day. I stay out of his hair and only engage w him if he comes out to hang out. I know his tone and tenure has nothing to do with me and he’s in work mode. Have you tried telling your husband that you need some space to be able to stay mentally on? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 03:39 AM Flag
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you need to set boundaries with him. When you are "at work" you are "at work." Period. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 12:02 AM Flag
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OP: Yeah. I need to figure our how to do this and stick to it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 04:30 AM Flag
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NP. Use your words, you are both adults, remind him that you are "at work" and need to keep interruptions to a minimum. Maybe schedule a specific time during the day to spend with him, like lunch, and then get back to work. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 02:44 PM Flag
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My 12 yo behaves better than that. He clams up when I'm in a meeting and ducks if he has to walk by. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 12:13 AM Flag
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Does your DH resent your success? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 12:14 AM Flag
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OP: good question. maybe? he would say he's more than supportive though. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 12:18 AM Flag
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np. sounds like he's intimidated by badass professional you, and prefers someone who would stroke his ego and play caretaker to him (interrupting you to ask about things in the freezer, really?) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 12:27 AM Flag
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lol no. it just sounds like he doesnt understand boundaries and cant understand that you have work responsibilities and a work persona. just sit him down and tell him when youre working you are a different person and need to be that person to get your job done and to not bother her. any reasonable husband would understand. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 12:45 AM Flag
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100%. and if you are efficient at work, you get done work faster. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 12:50 AM Flag
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So I guess this is the fundamental question I have. He leads me to believe part of us all being stuck inside means that I should be more loving and adapt my persona because circumstances are "different." What you're saying sounds more like how I'm operating isn't wrong and he's the one who needs to adjust? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.20, 12:50 AM Flag