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Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] In NYC and moving at the end of the month. Having movers pack us for the first time ever. Any tips? (It's a very close move so can move some things on our own and likely will). 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:49 PM Flag
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zomg the one time we did this, the movers made me so crazy. My only advice is to pack your own small things that you'll need right away in brightly labeled boxes (surface of kitchen table, counter, bathroom surface items, dresser, similar) and then leave the house while they work. I was like "wait I'm still working on this area," and they pretended not to understand me, and I had a tantrum about it. I went out for ice cream, my husband had to manage the dudes, and the day lives in infamy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 04:15 PM Flag
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Oh no! Yes I am planning to both be done with my packing small items AND to be out of the house while they are there (though I'll be managing DC and pets in the new location, so not sure I got the right end of the coin flip there) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 06:32 PM Flag
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Anything that you pack and they move is not covered by mover's insurance. Have all breakables packed by movers. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 08:05 PM Flag
[ - ] Watched posts question: why is it that I can only see posts from up to a few days ago.... where would all the others be, just get deleted? Thanks 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:37 PM Flag
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Not sure about watched, but the Last button will take you to "Want to get dh an Ipod for fathers day - how much , and are there various models?" http://www.urbanbaby.com/?page=61391 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 07:05 PM Flag
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op- thank you [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 08:57 PM Flag
[ - ] What's your ideal work schedule? I'm jealous of my friend who works 9-12 and is is free all afternoon and evening. I work 12-8 pm because everyone I work w is in California and part-time is not an option at my company. But I'm a morning person so I think my ideal would be 6 am - 2 pm. 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:11 PM Flag
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8-6 Tues through Thursday and 8-1 Friday for 35 hours/week. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:20 PM Flag
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Op: yes, that's good! Esp in summer. Back on the good old days, working until 8 pm Friday nights was hard. Not so bad now that there's nothing to do. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:27 PM Flag
[ - ] So what site are we all moving to? 22 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:58 PM Flag
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DCUrbanMom. I was on that site for years before coming here. Jeff runs a tight ship (and does it well). He doesn’t put up with nonsense. And to the person who asked earlier (I can’t find the post), you reply to a specific person by finding their post, going to the top right and clicking “quote” and then entering your reply. Bonus: the site is searchable! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:04 PM Flag
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++ [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:20 PM Flag
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+2 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:40 PM Flag
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The search function alone is lifechanging [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:43 PM Flag
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same [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:53 PM Flag
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He needs to create a ny schools option [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 04:56 PM Flag
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Yes, I need a place to boast about my DC at HCHS. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 06:58 PM Flag
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can we not? I can't even click on it [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.20, 02:17 PM Flag
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What about Reddit? It is fast paced and the format is much better than Dc urban mom. Dc’s format is infuriating [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:06 PM Flag
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REddit definitely feels more like UB's format [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:43 PM Flag
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r/breakingmoms seems closest, but we could also make a subreddit. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:59 PM Flag
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If I knew how to do this I would do it! Please make one!! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 04:42 PM Flag
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in what world is this like UB? Here you find a post by a 15 year old living with dad and stepmom who just had baby twins, the male child died, and step-mom is making her do too many chores around the house. Oh, and the pregnancy was non-consensual. No idea if this is real, but not exactly the UB audience. https://www.reddit.com/user/kaylynnemarie/ [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 04:57 PM Flag
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There are plenty of trolls, yes. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 06:35 PM Flag
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youbemom [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:22 PM Flag
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+1 way closer to this board and DCUM sounds funny and is too decentralized [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:27 PM Flag
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+2 theres already so much overlap. I dont know how you could get any closer to Urbanbaby than Youbemom. Its the SAME SITE. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 08:24 PM Flag
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citydata? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:27 PM Flag
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what happened to urbanbaby.net? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:46 PM Flag
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+1 - I thought someone was working on that option. How/when will we know? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:47 PM Flag
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This, she was going to a lot of trouble to preserve the UB qualities. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 10:51 PM Flag
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I’ll be there. Np [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.20, 07:14 AM Flag
[ - ] I guess I won't have a chance to get your imput his fall. Any thoughts on which would be your top 2 out of this list: Stuy, HSMSE, Tech, Beacon, Regis, Xavier? Smart ds, sporty but not a star, has also liked drama in past but not sure he'd do that in HS. Possibly debate. Dont need "the best". Would like capable school admin. Appreciate it. I'm new to all this. 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:38 PM Flag
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OP also live in NYU area so central [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:03 PM Flag
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If DC is interested in big schools- 1. Stuy, 2. Tech. If he prefers a small school- 1. HSMSE, 2, Xavier [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:15 PM Flag
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np regis in front of Xavier I think [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:19 PM Flag
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or- IA that that's how they "rank," but because OP said she's not so caught up in that stuff and bc they're in walking distance of Xavier, I'd give it the edge. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:26 PM Flag
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OP yes, thanks. I've been impressed with Xavier lately -- they've been in front of some of the BLM stuff, quick to acknowledge work they have to do etc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 05:11 PM Flag
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NP: Xavier is great, but Regis is free! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 08:27 PM Flag
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or- IA that that's how they "rank," but because OP said she's not so caught up in that stuff and bc they're in walking distance of Xavier, I'd give it the edge. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:26 PM Flag
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HSMSE was a horrible fit for my child. Some really horrible teachers (some OK, but some really horrid). Think learning German is a waste, and the school has trouble hiring German teachers. Facilities terribly overcrowded. Few choices. Wish my child had listed BX Sci first (scores were good enough for Stuy). Chose HSMSE first b/c concerned about BX sci being too big, plus we lived close to HSMSE and liked the campus feel. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 04:56 PM Flag
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OP I dont think learning German is a waste, but can totally imagine hiring teachers is hard. Did your dc retake in 9th -- should have been easy enough to switch into Bronx Sci, no? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 05:12 PM Flag
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Regis' debate team is amazing. Xavier better athletics. Stuy is very competitive culture and very big [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 07:10 PM Flag
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My order of these: Regis, Stuy, Xavier, Tech. All good enough choices, though -- Good Luck! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 08:26 PM Flag
[ - ] DB is 1 now and always thought UB would be around for K-admissions. Anyone who has btdt care to share advice on how to maximize his chances of getting into a TT? Non legacy family. I can’t ask shameless questions like this anywhere else and am not connected in NYC- not sure how I will do this without this site :( 15 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:35 PM Flag
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Go to 92Y preschool, be a billionaire, run the auction, donate $100K. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:46 PM Flag
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Join Parents League. If you’re at a connected preschool with lots of siblings and legacies, there will be far fewer spaces at the coveted schools for those who are not siblings, legacies, or billionaires. At some schools, the spots all go to those people, because there are 6-8 of them and an ongoing school doesn’t want to take so many from the same school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:51 PM Flag
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PP here, non-everything from a connected school. Connected school definitely helps because you have a PSD who has (presumably) relationships with the ongoing schools. And the teachers may be better versed in writing the school reports to make your kid shine. But the sibling/legacy/billionaire problem is real at those schools (those people getting/filling those spots). At times, there are 0-1 spots left over for everyone else, and those tend to go to families that add diversity (and it doesn’t seem that being “UB poor” equals diversity, ha!). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:02 PM Flag
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I think connected school is good for a family that is private or bust and willing to go anywhere. You will not be shut out at a connected school, and there is the possibility of being shut out from a public or an unconnected private. I think if you are TT or bust, connected school is very very tough. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 05:02 PM Flag
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Go to one of the "connected" preschools. People here will tell you not to. They are wrong. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:52 PM Flag
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What about what the previous poster said about all the good spots being taken by siblings and legacies at the connected preschools? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:59 PM Flag
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I posted below and think this is wrong. Those schools haven't been doing well in past years even for connected families. Know so many people at places like STMPG who are really disappointed: they are good if you want a guarantee that you can get into Browning/CSH/Marymount type schools, but they do not get a lot of kids into TT. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 04:11 PM Flag
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I agree with this. We were at connected preschool and DC got into TTT and several other VERY desirable schools. We are unconnected not URM or billionaires [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.20, 09:55 AM Flag
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We are unconnected at a TT school, and there are many people like us (and of course, many legacies too and connections). My advice is to go to a preschool that is in the middle. I think it's tough for unconnected families at places like Brick or Episcopal and those schools are not sending a ton to TT schools these days anyway. Do NOT go to one of the downtown connected preschools like Chelsea Day, Beginnings, First Presbyterian; that will be the worst of all worlds (though the schools themselves are great). But you also cannot just go to a random neighborhood school that's not very on top of the process. Think schools like Garden House, IPS, etc. These schools have good track records for unconnected families. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:02 PM Flag
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OR: And for an unconnected family, the most important things are the playdate and the school report (in that order). Make sure your kid has the basics down in terms of good behavior, can recognize her name, can draw a detailed picture, etc. It really doesn't matter whether you are the class parent and run the auction and I have seen people in those positions be repeatedly disappointed. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:03 PM Flag
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Agree with this. If on the UWS, for example, Hollingworth is a good choice. Small preschool, knows the K process well, but not a ton of kids so brokering will be less. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:24 PM Flag
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OR: Hollingworth is a GREAT choice (and we didn't go there). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:53 PM Flag
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+1 and they also send lots of HCES [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 07:02 PM Flag
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Apply to several. Remember that if you happen to live close to one, commute means something at that age (think snowy mornings, rainy days and for playdates). And don't worry if your kid does something on the playdate - they are 2 and it is expected. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 05:59 PM Flag
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Depends what the “something” is. Play dates are very important. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.20, 09:57 AM Flag
[ - ] I think I am 1 of 2 people keeping the UPenn/PennSt joke alive for 14 years. When one of those schools comes up in future years in my real life, I will think of UB 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:10 PM Flag
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? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:12 PM Flag
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I remember it well. And I'll think of you this weekend when I put on my orange jumpsuit and Dalton Sweatshirt, and sit down to quaff a peach beer and some Hamptons lobster with my uniformed nanny!! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:54 PM Flag
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Don't forget Fiji water! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 09:30 PM Flag
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Wasn’t funny for 13.9 years [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 04:46 PM Flag
[ - ] Does anyone remember the poster who signed every post Fondly, S? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:09 PM Flag
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YES! Loved her. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:48 PM Flag
[ - ] Has anyone watched "Hamilton" yet? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 01:56 PM Flag
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Not yet, tonight. Saw that it’s running now. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:10 PM Flag
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Don't have Disney+ [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:13 PM Flag
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My dh bought it for dcs at around 7am. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 04:43 PM Flag
[ - ] I'm a teacher in another state. My district just announced we are going back with a hybrid model. I have three kids, ages 3, 6 and 8. I was planning on just paying for daycare for the 3 year old full time. Now I'd have to pay that plus 3 days of full day care for the school aged kids and then come home at night to work on all their school work. This is not possible for me. I have no other choice but to resign. It's too late to do a LOA. I'm really glad we can afford to live on one income, some teachers in my school can't. 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 01:38 PM Flag
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Maybe things will change come mid August [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:38 PM Flag
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We go back mid August. And numbers in my state are declining. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 04:33 PM Flag
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Try to take a leave so that you can step back in when this is over. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 04:43 PM Flag
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You have a choice to suck this up for one year even if it means you lose money. This pandemic isn’t convenient for any of us [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 05:05 PM Flag
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I don't think I'm going to be willing to pay more for childcare than I clear in take home pay. My husband contacted his HR and while health insurance is more at his job than it is through mine, we'd actually save money by me staying home. I think I'm going to just homeschool for a year or so. I teach special education and my school probably won't be able to replace me (I'm the autism behavioral specialist in my building). But I know I can always come back at any time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 09:21 PM Flag
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ITA with OR. Take the long term view. We always advice new moms that the years with high-child care expenses are worth it to preserve your career, benefits and growth potential. This is only an year. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 09:32 PM Flag
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ITDA. Teaching is a job that is easy to return to, especially if you have sped qualifications. If you can get benefits through your spouse, take the year off. Covid is no joke. I had it and 8 weeks later, I'm still sick. Enjoy spending time with your kids and home schooling. I'm sure your kids will learn far more from you than whatever shitshow the DOE is going to give us this year. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.20, 12:58 AM Flag
[ - ] I will miss the brutal honesty on UB. This is the ONLY place I have been able to go where people across the entire political spectrum express their thoughts, and for the most part nobody gets shamed into silence if others disagree. There are a lot of very smart, well informed people here, and I've appreciated hearing everyone's perspective even when I disagree. I hope this aspect of UB will survive the migration to the DC moms site. 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 01:26 PM Flag
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I don't know. I'm not sure I'd call UB a place with "brutal honesty". Imo, I see it as an place where most people are incredibly unkind. I'm really not sure why I come here, tbh. Maybe it is where I channel my inner mean girl. I think I'm okay with letting go of that. This isn't a healthy board. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 01:29 PM Flag
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+1. It mostly exemplifies how every is the same, everywhere. People who consider themselves "sophisticated," "educated," and generally above others are just as low-IQ, closed-minded, jealous and greedy as everyone else. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 01:46 PM Flag
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+2. I think people here are told to shut up and accused of believing things they didn't say all the time, and you have tons of flat-out bad faith trolling. This board is good for some things but not political discourse. AND you have the class-toned comments, ex. the post about the cannonball into the above-ground pool where the OP was told she must live in Kentucky, and no "good" neighborhood anywhere in the US would allow an above-ground pool). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:38 PM Flag
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Agree. But we keep coming back for the emotional abuse. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:32 PM Flag
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Totally agree [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 01:42 PM Flag
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Same. Losing UB is a huge loss for me. I really hope it can be recreated. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 05:48 PM Flag
[ - ] Whatever happened to FTM (first-time mom) from last year? She was overwhelmed with a new baby (maybe PPD?) and struggling with guilt about not traveling to Asia to visit her mom who she had a difficult relationship with and who was ill. 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 01:19 PM Flag
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I remember her. The post that I wonder about is the one where the aunt was thinking about taking her niece for an abortion. That one stayed with me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 01:32 PM Flag
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Oh that stuck with me too. No idea. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 06:03 PM Flag
[ - ] Before we are disbanded, can someone explain the dalton sweatshirt mom story got us relative newcomers? 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 01:18 PM Flag
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And not to hijack, but what was the dalton sweatshirt story? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:32 PM Flag
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Op: I don’t know. I just know that dalton sweatshirt mom was famous around here. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:37 PM Flag
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It was kind of a one-off, someone posted that she had seen someone jogging in a Dalton Sweatshirt and it was the end of the world. In true UB fashion, everyone piled on, saying if her kids went she could wear it, or she could wear it if she paid for it, or if she went there, you get the idea. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:58 PM Flag
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Haha. Thanks. My husband won’t let me wear my dalton hat in public FWIW. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:18 PM Flag
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Why? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:55 PM Flag
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He thinks its bright/obnoxious. He won’t let kids wear it either. He’s a snob snob. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 05:44 PM Flag
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Braggy not bright [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 05:50 PM Flag
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But isn't Dalton a fancy schmancy school? Why should this jogging mom be embarrassed by it? Or was it just that she herself clearly didn't go there at the time of wearing? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:46 PM Flag
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Nothing was clear except that it was her property. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:48 PM Flag
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Got it. Typical UB mystery! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:55 PM Flag
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Also not to hijack, but was someone really posting to UB from inside a jail? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.20, 12:12 PM Flag
[ - ] This totally has the last week of college feel after exams before graduation. We're in limbo on so many levels, it's hot, we're clinging to each other and the fun memories, we're not sure if we'll stay in touch after the big day, we want to but know it won't really be the same. 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 12:24 PM Flag
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THIS [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 12:25 PM Flag
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Looking at DCUrban mom. I’m an idiot, but how do you reply there? I see the post reply button but how do you respond to a specific comment? Need a training video! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 12:43 PM Flag
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aawwww [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 12:52 PM Flag
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I was totally thinking the same thing last night [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 01:22 PM Flag
[ - ] Ok everyone, since we won't have a chance lets UB like it 2021. 24 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 12:15 PM Flag
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I just got my Covid vaccine. Is it normal to have a low fever? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 12:17 PM Flag
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:-) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 12:52 PM Flag
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As my grandmother would say- from your mouth to Gods ears [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 04:41 PM Flag
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♡♡♡♡ [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.20, 02:06 AM Flag
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I wish I hadn't moved out of the city last year . I miss it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 12:54 PM Flag
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Same. I still don’t even have 5 of my 7 bedrooms furnished. And it turns out, pool maintenance sucks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 01:28 PM Flag
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And the “blue ribbon public school” here is nowhere near as good as the TT I pulled my DCs out of [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 01:54 PM Flag
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I am so glad I moved out of the city last year. Best decision we ever made. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 12:54 PM Flag
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I am so tired after my trek to the office yesterday. How did I manage to do that 5 days a week? 1 day every 2 weeks is exhausting enough! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 01:25 PM Flag
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Please tell me how your TT private is handling the rolling covid closures? Ours is doing great, but I need some validation here... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 01:29 PM Flag
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So strange not wearing my mask anymore. Covered up my jowls and double chin! Feel so naked. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:00 PM Flag
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And having to cover my nose and cheeks with sunscreen sucks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.20, 02:09 AM Flag
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Argh...took all my LV dust bags to have masks made — what do I do with them now? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:02 PM Flag
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And here I thought we were unique posing for our Christmas card with our masks on! (PLEASE DON’T, PEOPLE) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:05 PM Flag
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Will my Nanny be annoyed if I throw in a few rolls of TP with her bonus. I have sooo much! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:08 PM Flag
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good one! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:47 PM Flag
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Toss in a new uniform for her. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:56 PM Flag
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Do you remember when we thought masks and protests were going to be a historical moment? They’ll just be footnotes in the story of this civil war. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:36 PM Flag
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Omg this is great! I'm going to miss it here :( [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 04:41 PM Flag
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But which schools are TT? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 07:35 PM Flag
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Remember when the worst thing that happened to us was COVID? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.20, 01:22 AM Flag
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President Biden's funeral was lovely, wasn't it? Hard to believe...Our first woman president. And our second black president. She's going to be amazing. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.20, 08:10 AM Flag
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your mouth to god's ear [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.20, 04:32 PM Flag
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I never thought I'd say this : I wish we were back to 2020 ! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.20, 09:36 AM Flag
[ - ] Let's make a list of the best UB posts of all time... 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 11:53 AM Flag
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I had one MP in all these years. The “Anything but CV post.” March 11 2020. I loved that post. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 12:26 PM Flag
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oh, i'm pretty sure i posted about my new tretorns in that post. You'll be happy to know that they are still pristine because i don't go out! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 12:35 PM Flag
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lol [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 12:53 PM Flag
[ - ] I'm a web developer - I'm grabbing a full copy of the site to save all of the old posts. I'm going to try to clean it up and make it searchable and post it eventually at ubarchive.net. I won't have it done before sunday, but when it's ready I'll post on youbemom and dc urban baby. I will miss all of you terribly! 14 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 11:34 AM Flag
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^^ even the mean ones! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 11:36 AM Flag
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Yesterday I would have said hell yeah but now that some time has passed I think my attitude to the demise of UB has moved through the denial and anger stages to acceptance. UB was like a beautiful flower that bloomed and then faded. And that’s OK. not everything lasts forever. Everyone will move on and find another mom group. It might not be just like UB and that’s OK too. It was great while it lasted. It set a high bar. It will never be replicated. As one of the patron saints of UB says, let us thank it for service and let go. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 01:03 PM Flag
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I'd been thinking lately about how sad it would be if it totally dwindled and was still here but had zero activity. This is probably better. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 01:09 PM Flag
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I don’t disagree with you, but I don’t think I will be able to find another group like this. Many of these women are so smart and resourceful. I don’t have a lot of friends IRL so it is a double loss. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 01:40 PM Flag
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Smart? Please. I come here to laugh at the ignorance. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 01:48 PM Flag
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I feel the same. I don’t have many friends and this site meant a lot to me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:34 PM Flag
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Thank you so much! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 01:53 PM Flag
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Yes please! Thank you! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:38 PM Flag
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Thank you so much!! So we just go to ubarchive.net in a week or two? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 04:46 PM Flag
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Yep! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 08:05 PM Flag
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BUT please leave out all of the stuff about the Krims. There were horrible posts about them here. Their eldest is old enough to read the vile things said about them. Signed, a friend. Thank you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 06:04 PM Flag
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OMG. How could anyone have awful stuff to say about that poor family? This site was helpful for some things, but it sure showed the pure rottenness of some people [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 07:33 PM Flag
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Because when something terrible befalls someone you want to believe it won't happen to you. People reacted to the randomness of it and assigned all sorts of blame to the Krims so that they could rest easily knowing it would not happen to them. It was awful. But the NYC community really supported the Krims in the end, just these wenches on here got nasty [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 09:05 PM Flag
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Great idea. You should create an email address and post here. If people want to be notified about the new site they can let you know. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.20, 12:32 PM Flag
[ - ] Denial > Anger > Bargaining > Depression > Acceptance. I’m still in denial, so here goes. Work has been so stressful lately that I can’t stop thinking about it when I’m not working. The worst is waking up and my first thoughts are rehashing meetings or running through scenarios and possible solutions. I get out of bed just to shake it off. Can anyone relate? How do you break the background thought track? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 11:22 AM Flag
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I am in the same boat, I think the pandemic anxiety is making coping with everything else really hard. I have had obsessive thoughts about everything, and work especially. I've been annoyed because everyone keeps telling me to meditate but i have to be honest, when I meditate even for short periods of time, it really helps. "insight timer" app & a 7 to 10 minute guided meditation [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 11:24 AM Flag
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Obsessive thoughts...that’s what it is. I’ve never tried meditation before, but will give it a shot. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 11:33 AM Flag
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Seconding meditation. Even five minutes helps. It's so hard to start because you are still thinking like crazy but keep trying until you find a guided one that you can pay attention to. I hope you feel better soon. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:35 PM Flag
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I did this too, it was definitely a form of anxiety/obsessive thoughts. I handled it by quitting. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:35 PM Flag
[ - ] Things UB has done for me: 14 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 09:50 AM Flag
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The only reason DD got into private school after being rejected everywhere is UB advice. Numerous work tips. Gazillion tips on having DD in the first place. Husband advice. Sympathy after numerous IVF failures. I've been here for 20 years - this is really my primary source of advice. Yeah, you got lots of crap, but also, in almost every thread- that comment that made all the difference. Thank you everyone [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 09:53 AM Flag
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This is where I always come for advice too. I have been through hell in the past five years and UB was here for me when no one else was. My mom died and UB became my surrogate mom. So many smart women here, and even the tough love is absolutely what I've needed. I'm so sad! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 11:02 AM Flag
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+1 As I went through my saved posts I realized how much UB has been with me at all times - good and bad. You guys are the best! You gave me really great advice and I will miss having you all in my corner :( [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 01:37 PM Flag
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UB got me through three kids, cheating husband with alcohol problems, advice as I was setting up my first real home. It also occurred to me that this site could have been a goldmine if it had been set up correctly. One simple way are the favorite things posts. I have bought SO many things from those, and they have been awesome. If there were a simple product recommendation link that listed different products, I am sure the site would have paid for itself. Almost like a "oprah's favorite things" but instead "UB favorite things" [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 11:24 AM Flag
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Yes! I would have loved this! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:35 PM Flag
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Helping me understand how to deal with an adopted child's black skin (she is 35 on the Von Luschan chart). She just turned 10! I had some snarky response but some really helpful one. We have learned a lot. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 11:43 AM Flag
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knowing I'm not alone with ADHD child. Whatever my child was doing, others were going through the same thing. Just knowing that is so helpful. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 12:45 PM Flag
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Same here. So helpful for me going through a brutal year with adhd dd the year before this. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 01:41 PM Flag
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Gave me an outlet as an armchair therapist w/o ever having to get a degree or actually see anyone. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 01:36 PM Flag
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or getting paid [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:11 PM Flag
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Helped navigate the private school process. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:16 PM Flag
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Found my NYC neighborhood, apartment building and kids' schools, having relocated from another state 10 years ago. Still in the same building. Literally, would not be where I am without UB. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 02:37 PM Flag
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Validated me feeling overwhelmed working in an intense job and having 3 high schoolers [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 07:01 PM Flag
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Gave me encouragement when I was clinically depressed and needed to go on. It was bad and I couldn't burden my friends. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.20, 08:14 AM Flag
[ - ] Didn't think 2020 could get any worse!! Coronavirus, quarantine, protests, looting, curfews, terrible President and now UB shutting down?!! 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 05:51 AM Flag
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If Trump gets re-elected then this will be the cherry on top for the year. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 05:55 AM Flag
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Agreed. I'm a DH and I've learned so much about women's minds from this wonderful place. I came back in Covid to see how you're all doing and it was a relief in a way. Best wishes all you lovely ladies! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 09:21 AM Flag
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to you too! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.20, 03:21 PM Flag
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