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Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] To the mom who posted about her dh having an affair with the nanny, I am sorry for the fact that your husband was weak and his weakness lead to him cheating on his family. For the other parents out there, this is nothing new in nannies world, your husbands has been coming on to their nannies for sooooooooooo long we nannies can tell stories, after stories, after stories about some of the bullshit we have to put up with from your husbands, so count your lucky stars, at least you caught the son of a bitch, be strong and get the best lawyer his money can buy. 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:58 AM Flag
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okey doke, troll [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:00 PM Flag
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Why are you calling this woman a troll? Meanwhile, she is correct. Are you new to a world where nannies are commonplace? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:27 PM Flag
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She's absolutely correct. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:28 PM Flag
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correct or not, she's just trying to stir up controversy = troll [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:31 PM Flag
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A troll is anyone who says something, true or not, that is unpleasant for you to hear? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:32 PM Flag
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not the point, she's just...oh forget it [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:38 PM Flag
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she's just....saying something you fear? yes, but that doesn't mean she is a troll or it isn't true [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:39 PM Flag
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a don't have a friggin' nanny. she's just trying to elicit an emotional response to feed her ego about something that everyone is aware of on some level [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:40 PM Flag
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Ok, I thought you were saying it never happened. Feeding her ego, do you think so? She needs a reality check if she thinks being the help that the master of the house schtups is worthy of arrogance! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:43 PM Flag
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Ya but was the nanny at least pretty hot? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 08.26.08, 06:49 PM Flag
[ - ] i currently have tmobile and my contract is up. was thinking about switching to verizon. is it much better? what is customer service like? it is more expensive but is the difference THAT great? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 06.30.08, 11:54 AM Flag
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fwiw: how often do you need customer service on your cell phone? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:58 AM Flag
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It is better -- I often get service on my Verizon when my dh can't get service on his Sprint. That being said, I had Sprint for a while and was ok with its service. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:25 PM Flag
[ - ] Kitchen/renovation question:would it be weird to have hood more than 6' above stove? We're both over 6' tall! Tia for any advice. 36 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:51 AM Flag
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I think there is a standard height (not sure what it is) that isn't based on your height but to maximize efficiency. What about a retractable hood/recircultaor that rises from the back? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:53 AM Flag
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op:hadn't thought of that. Thanks, will research it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:58 AM Flag
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Those have been proven by Consumer Reports to be totally useless. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 07:13 AM Flag
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Tall dad who has done a fair amount of kitchen remodeling: you never stand under the hood. Are you raising it for head clearance? or sight lines? (Or is this over an island?) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:00 PM Flag
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op:hi tall dad. Raising for head clearance (ie to avoid bending to check on pots). What are sight lines? No, not over an island. Tia [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:04 PM Flag
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Mock one up with cardboard and check heights, I'll bet you find it is not a big deal. It would only matter on the back burner and even there... (Sight lines would be when you look through the kitchen is it blocking your view out a window, or to the area where people will be working or hanging out.) My one piece of advice, if not too late, raise one prep area of counter 1.5 inches. It makes it so much better on your back when you are working in there. (BTW- You can raise the hood but may have to increase draw of fan/hood. This means more air leaving kitchen which, in the winter, means more lost heat. Also, possibly more noise. And it could mean bigger ducts so more lost cabinet space.) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:15 PM Flag
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op:thanks. Truth is we rarely use the hood for fan/vent as we have a big kitchen window and prefer to use that. Hood has a light which is what we use. Only reason we're keeping hood is for resale value if and when we sell. Thought that because of this reason we can make it work for our comfort...does this make sense? Would love to raise ALL the counters but not touching counters for $$ reasons! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:23 PM Flag
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So you are not renovating kitchen, just raising hood a few inches? From that I am assuming it is not a ducted hood and there is no cabinet above it. If that is correct: I bet the hood is worth what, $100. I say pull it down, put it in storage (or the trash) and put back up/replace when you leave. Put some recessed lights in the ceiling to light the stove and you are good to go. (Always have at least 2 lights focused on your stove top/work space. Otherwise shadows drive you nuts.) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:51 PM Flag
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op:hi again. So sorry but contractors and kids, I never got back to the computer yesterday. You're right, it's not a ducted hood and there is no cabinetry above. The hood is a Miele and very nice. You're right though that we could remove it altogether but it gives great lighting over the stove - and we use it mainly for that - even if we hardly ever use it for it's actual purpose! Contractor back today to work on the kitchen so I'll post back if you're watching and let you know how it goes. Thinking of raising it 8" ie 38" above stove. It'll come up to 75" from the floor. Btw, the ceiling is about 14' so I think we can get away with this height... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:05 AM Flag
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good luck. It will be fine! Make sure they paint behind it before moving or you will not be able to move it back down without repainting kitchen. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 07:04 AM Flag
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Huh? I'm not tall but my hood was very low and I constantly banged my head when I leaned over to get to back burners. Seriously, could have taken out my eye, had to raise it. But, it was too low. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:21 AM Flag
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if youre making your own kitchen, do whatever you want, but down the road, other people might think its weird. Mostly because you will probably lose any cabinet space you had over the hood (or the ability to have a microhood) and that to me is a big drawback especially if were talking manhattan litchens [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:08 PM Flag
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op:thanks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:14 PM Flag
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will you be standing on the stove often? why would it need to be 6' above stove just because you're a few inches taller than average?? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:16 PM Flag
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op:lol. You're right, that was silly of me to phrase it like that! I meant we're both over 6' and wanted to raise hood to over the 30" position it's at right now. From floor to bottom of hood, I was wondering if we could do something like 6' 3" or if that would look totally weird. Have received some great advice from tall dad and another poster above so will keep those pointers in mind... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:19 PM Flag
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oh, I feel like Emily Litella now, NEVER MIND! Yeah, I think a few inches higher would be totally fine. If its got a good fan it won't hurt function, and might even make the room feel more open for us shorties, too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:21 PM Flag
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op: That made me laugh again, thanks! (although now I'll have to google Emily Litella...) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:24 PM Flag
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np you youngsters! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:25 PM Flag
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np: OMG I just was talking about that the other night, but couldnt remember the name. Awesome! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:30 PM Flag
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What's all this talk I hear about Violins on Television? What's so bad about that? Seems like if people want to enjoy some music that wouldn't be the end of the world! I think its sort of nice! Better than most the crap that's on TV these days.... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:34 PM Flag
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Uh, Emily, that's VIOLENCE on Television [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:35 PM Flag
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Oh. That's different. NEVER MIND [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:35 PM Flag
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np: And why do we keep hearing about eagle's rights? Eagles can't even talk. How about Parakeets' rights? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:59 PM Flag
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hey, tall dad again: are you looking for a new hood or just raising the existing one? If new, they make a few hoods where the hood is tempered glass. They look great. (Granted, you probably spend a lot of time with a bottle of Windex in your hand but it looks mahvelous...) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:41 PM Flag
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op:hi again. keeping the existing one. But thanks so much for all the info! You must have a fabulous kitchen! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:07 AM Flag
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I love it, but I'm ready to do it over again. (Ever time I redo it, I find one thing I could have done "better." That one thing drives me nuts until I take a week off of work and redo it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 07:12 AM Flag
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op: exactly how many times have you redone it?! It must be exhausting to upgrade all the time - at least based on my limited experience! Having said that, I have to admit that yes, there are so many things I'd love to change. Update: Hood looks perfectly fine at the new height and am glad I went for it. :) Thanks again for all the advice. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:21 AM Flag
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^^oh, and tall dad, do you just happen to also know lots about fireplaces??! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:25 AM Flag
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Not a lot but I helped build one as a younger man. It is an incredible art to design the interior so that it draws the smoke up and out without sucking all the heat out of the room. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:50 AM Flag
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op:have an existing wood burning fireplace installed in 1980. Don't know the make/model. Want to upgrade and am looking at a line I found online called Rais. Have you heard of them? http://tinyurl.com/52tup7 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 12:16 PM Flag
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Haven't heard of it but I looked. Would it be too corny to say, "That fireplace is hot."? I really like the look of that. Especially with that glass hearth. Completely not my style, but I love the aesthetic. (I don't like the wood under neath in that setting, though. Very "country" for such a modern space.) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 12:43 PM Flag
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np: We have one of those fireplaces with the special vents so that the smoke gets sucked up but somehow hot air comes out of the vents. It heats our living and dining rooms - love it! (Craftsman house built in the 40s) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 12:20 PM Flag
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I know what you mean. Heat is forced out through openings that get heated and act as a channel for the air. They made (make?) this weird looking contraption that is a bunch of large iron pipes that replaces your grate. The wood goes inside these "C" shaped pipes and the fire super heats the top of the "C" shaped pipes so it draws cooler air from the bottom then pushes the hot air out the top. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 12:30 PM Flag
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should have added: I love Craftsmen Houses/style. When I retire I am going to do nothing but build my Modern interpretations of Craftsmen furniture. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 12:32 PM Flag
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op:post here and you may have a readymade client base! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 12:37 PM Flag
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I have a client waiting at home... But someday. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 12:44 PM Flag
[ - ] am i the only one who thinks it's ok to have about 8 family members over my house for my 2 year old's birthday party? friends are shocked that i'm not renting some kind of play space for my son and his "friends" 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:50 AM Flag
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for my #1 I had a large party with her classmates but for #2 (a summer bday) we had just family over for a picnic [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:50 AM Flag
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No you are right. We did a party at home for ds 2nd birthday and the money we saved on hiring somewhere we put towards drinks for the adults. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:52 AM Flag
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Now, THAT's a child's bday party I'd love to attend! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:56 AM Flag
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Oh, God, I am so with you. DD isn't getting a party with "friends "until she's old enough to ask for one. She doesn't know the difference, and I don't need the hassle or the expense. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:55 AM Flag
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op: thank you! i like finding other down to earth moms out there! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:58 AM Flag
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I don't think the no-party-for-a-toddler idea is strange at all. I think it's sensible. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:59 AM Flag
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we have done this for 1st, 2nd, and 3rd birthdays. this year (3rd birthday) it was a bit of a stretch and we'll probably do something small with her friends next year. but for the 2nd it was absolutely fine. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:02 PM Flag
[ - ] Anyone watch Denise Richards, It's Complicated? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:48 AM Flag
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not if I can help it [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:11 PM Flag
[ - ] frenemy 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:48 AM Flag
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who is Meredith [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:48 AM Flag
[ - ] OMG Edy's DIBS are so damn good 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:47 AM Flag
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Hate them [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:49 AM Flag
[ - ] How much do you have in savings? 13 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:46 AM Flag
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zero [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:49 AM Flag
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Not enough. About 4K in the bank, and about $150K in retirement/stocks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:52 AM Flag
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millions. If we lived in new york, that would be hundreds [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:53 AM Flag
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lol! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:57 AM Flag
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Enough for now. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:53 AM Flag
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About 2 years living expenses [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:56 AM Flag
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About $130K, plus $20Kish in IRAs [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:58 AM Flag
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about 2k. You know I have to laugh at this post. The people who post with their 150k in savings, please for future reference do not post on people in financial crisis. Just not the same. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:05 PM Flag
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what? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:07 PM Flag
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I am referring to another post, but I think some of the woman here posted there as well. Just my opinion. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:09 PM Flag
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110k- our down payment on a house, one of these days. Retirement accounts used to be 250k, but I am afraid to look. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:12 PM Flag
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Just looked at my retirement account. I'd advice you not to look. Ouch! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:30 PM Flag
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That was supposed to say "advise" [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:31 PM Flag
[ - ] How do families that make under 200K manage to fully fund their children's college education? 30 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:45 AM Flag
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god knows. We make 90k and know we won't be able to fund their college. they will have to do it the old fashioned way like we did (work and loans) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:48 AM Flag
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OP. But don't most Americans make under 200K (uneder 100K for that matter)? What is the average HHI? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:49 AM Flag
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Where are you from? The average HHI is closer to $50K than $100K, definitely nowhere near $200K. Plenty of people manage to save a lot more than you do, especially those living in areas with reasonable cost of living. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:52 AM Flag
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or: I would think so..not sure what the ave. american HHI is [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:53 AM Flag
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nnp last time I saw figures, the avg income was around 55 or 60K [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:03 PM Flag
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The average HHI in the U.S. is about 55K. And, this is not just a non-NYC issue. The fact is that the vast majority of NYC households ALSO make between 30-70K--which (as most of those posting here know) doesn't travel far in NYC. Among the most progressive ways that this issue could be redressed is to begin to allow the first 25-40K of earned income to escape FICA tax, while significantly upping the upper threshold past which no FICA is paid (currently around 100K). This is the most regressive tax that exists in the U.S. and the sad truth is that most people have no fucking clue. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 05:07 PM Flag
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NP --- same here [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:49 AM Flag
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Where do you live? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:51 AM Flag
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or; Manhattan [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:53 AM Flag
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How on earth??? They save, imagine that. Plenty of people do it with $100K and less, too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:51 AM Flag
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OP. But many private colleges cost about 40K per year. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:56 AM Flag
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np: then I guess many go to a state school [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:57 AM Flag
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Yep! Most everyone I went to HS with went to the excellent state university down the street. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:59 AM Flag
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Exactly, most kids go to their state school, which is much much less than $40K. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:59 AM Flag
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Not I. I went to a private school on the west coast 40k a year, I had 2 years of tuition from my parents the rest was grants, scholarships, and student loans. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:08 PM Flag
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don't spend money on shit, put it in the bank instead [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:53 AM Flag
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yeah, unfortunately concept of saving and not spending money you don't have is not something majority of US population bought into. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:54 AM Flag
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NP true, but some of us don't spend $$ on shit and still don't have emough to save for college. We do ok but seriously, after house payments (on a $145K house so no comments) and gas and food, funding retirement etc, there isn't much left over [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:07 PM Flag
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Do you qualify for a Coverdell Education account? That's the best deal in education funding, but its income-limited. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:13 PM Flag
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not sure. I know DH was looking into all that when DD was born. He handles the finances and I can't remember what he decided. Probably so if it's a good deal. I'll check into that though. Thanks for the reminder [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:15 PM Flag
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it beats 529 plan by a mile, but again, not everyone qualifies. Also, Series EE bonds can be used tax advantaged, but subject to income limits as well. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:17 PM Flag
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cool. thanks. I do need to check up on that. DH is good with $$ etc but can be a procrastinator! Thanks again for the info and reminder [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:18 PM Flag
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We probably won't be able to, at least not a private school. We save for her, but it would require, like 7K a year in savings, which we definitely don't have with our 95K HHi in NYC. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:53 AM Flag
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Some savings, some loans, some of dc's income [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:54 AM Flag
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Private colleges cost about 50K per year including room and board. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:02 PM Flag
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not sure what you mean by "fully fund". We try to save what we can for retirement and for her college. She will go to private school so we will be paying for that fully. She will know from early on that we will be able to help but not pay for everything. She iwll have to work (like I did) and get scholarships to pay for college. I don't think that is a bad thing. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:02 PM Flag
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No, it's not. I was lucky that my parents could pay my tuition, but I was responsible for the rest. I had jobs during the school year and summers, and it worked out fine. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:04 PM Flag
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yep. I know among my friends that those of us who paid for at least part of our educations, appreciated it more and were more serious about it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:05 PM Flag
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I mean your kid does not have to work (except for own spending money) or take out any loans for school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:06 PM Flag
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that's what I guessed you meant but I wasn't sure. Still, I think it's not bad to expect a kid to pay for at least some of her own education [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:09 PM Flag
[ - ] dh and i are in couple's therapy for the past month. this is the 2nd time around, we stopped over a year ago. it has helped us. we are not going this week due to scheduling conflicts and i have to say i am so happy to not be going. i just can't stand all the whining by dh sometimes. at least to me it seems like whining sometimes. i know that sounds awful and therapy is a place we can talk about our feelings and what is going on and we do, but sometimes it is just too much. 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:43 AM Flag
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We also have been going for a while, and I never look forward to it. But afterward, I'm glad we did it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:47 AM Flag
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Why are you in therapy? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:48 AM Flag
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dh and i went for a while - i felt the exact same way - both of us whining and complaining about each other. and sad fact is that there are some things neither one of us are willing to change [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:56 AM Flag
[ - ] Off College admissions from privates post: Other OP stated that at her school the college counselor was or was almost fired because of poor admissions results. I think this is reason number one why these schools still want legacy families filling the classes. Legacy families are more trusting and understanding of the school and have more faith in their direction. WDYT? 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 06.30.08, 11:42 AM Flag
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I don't think I care. Its unfair thats all I know. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:48 AM Flag
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LOL! You are a democrat aren't you? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:05 PM Flag
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Nope! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:26 PM Flag
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Actually I don't think that's true. Legacy families still expect the same performance they got some 30 years ago, and it is much harder to make it happen now. Even the legacies don't often get in any more. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:32 PM Flag
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Even 30 yrs ago senior classes had bad years for ivy admissions or college admissions overall. What are you talking about? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:33 PM Flag
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Yes but I think it did not come out of the left field like it often does now. Even kids with absolutely stellar credentials get rejected now. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:35 PM Flag
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Are we talking about for college or for entrance to private? In my HS class a thousand years ago three girls with stellar credentials and two with HYP legacies were rejected. It happens, nothing new here this year. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:37 PM Flag
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Rejected everywhere? Or just from Harvard? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:54 PM Flag
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^^^we had plenty of kids that did not get their first choice but almost everyone seemed to get one of the schools they wanted. Can't remember anyone who just got into their one safety school, which seems to happen quite a bit these days. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:56 PM Flag
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about 40% of our class ended up at a safety. of course they only let us apply to 6 - bonkers. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:57 PM Flag
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Each rejected from the legacy schools their father/mother went to. High scoring top of class girls. The other one without a legacy connection also rejected and she was arguably the best student in the grade. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:56 PM Flag
[ - ] Need real estate advice- if you found a house you loved and it was in a very residential neighborhood, but on the corner of a side street and a busy street (facing the side street), would you buy it? 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 06.30.08, 11:42 AM Flag
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If it was right on the street then no but if it is back a little way then probably. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:50 AM Flag
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unfortunately, it's pretty close to the street... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:53 AM Flag
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Would it be noisy? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:55 AM Flag
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no, I don't think so. If you're outside in the backyard you could certainly hear cars going by, but in the house you can't hear it at all. it's a new construction so the windows are well insulated. the busy street is still a neighborhood street- not like big trucks or anything, but a main town road. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:00 PM Flag
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OK then why aren't you certain about it? Sounds like it might be fine. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:09 PM Flag
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worried mainly about kids being close to the street (would put up fence to contain them) and worried about resale value. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:11 PM Flag
[ - ] SORELLE CRIBS: anyone familiar? Are they well built? Tia 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:40 AM Flag
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Made by the same company that makes Pali. Ours was great and cost like 225 at BBB. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:18 PM Flag
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I loved mine adn it stood up beautifully through 2 children. Looks good, fiunctions well. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:44 PM Flag
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REviewed well everywhere I've looked. I've been eyeing the Sorelle cradle at Target [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:52 PM Flag
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op: thanks everyone. I was off most of yesterday so didn't see your replies until this morning. Tx again [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:04 AM Flag
[ - ] What do parents in district 15 do about G&T programs/tests? As far as I can tell - there are none. Does that mean that if dc doesn't get into citywide - she's doomed to the zoned school? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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NY Schools 06.30.08, 11:39 AM Flag
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There are plenty of G & T programs in D 15. many D 15 zoned schools are better than those schools, though. Look on Inside Schools... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:42 AM Flag
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321 doesn't have G&T [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:41 PM Flag
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there are lots of great D15 schools -- take tours before you freaked out. i'm quite happy that my dd is "doomed" to our zoned school, lol. and it's not 321. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 01:00 PM Flag
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LOL! Many NYers would be thrilled to be "doomed" to the schools in D15. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 01:00 PM Flag
[ - ] Thinking about an au pair, but afraid DH might hit on her, or more... Current nanny isn't his type. Anyone BTDT? 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 06.30.08, 11:38 AM Flag
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If you think that don't get an au pair please, stick with the 50+ nannies. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:39 AM Flag
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ita - I trust my dh but wouldn't be happy to deliberately put temptation in his way. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:48 AM Flag
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Sounds like you married the wrong guy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:39 AM Flag
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No, sounds like she's being rational in an imperfect world. Fresh catnip in front of a man will cause flights of fancy in the most faithful of men. Unless they're brain dead or whipped! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 01:18 AM Flag
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That's absurd. It's not like DH does not have plenty of opportunity to do this at work or elsewhere, if so inclined. Either you married a loser or not. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:13 AM Flag
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Au contraire. Opportunity is an opportunity. It has nothing to do with being a loser. Will you call your DH a loser if he as much as look at another woman? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:29 AM Flag
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Why are so many wealthy and attractive wives and mothers in nyc worried about their husbands cheating??? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.05.08, 09:28 PM Flag
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Because a lot of them do cheat? Of course plenty of wives do as well. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:14 AM Flag
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because even the ugliest man dreams about an affair. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:15 AM Flag
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Insecure trophy wife syndrome. If DH married you because look hot then it is only a matter of time before the beauty fades. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:42 PM Flag
[ - ] I posted on Friday about my five+ year old boy who said he was a sissy. He said that he came to this realization because of a book he read. That he liked to read and do art (girl stuff) more than he liked to play ball. I asked him what book it was Friday when I got home. He said it was "Oliver Button is a Sissy." Talk about missing the point. Thanks to everyone from Friday (on every side of the discussion.) I wanted to follow up for those who might be interested. 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:37 AM Flag
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did you explain the point of the story and what did he say? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:38 AM Flag
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I did not know (until today) what the book was about. It was a classroom book from his Kindergarten class. We'll talk about it tonight and maybe make our own version. (He really does enjoy making his own books.) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:49 AM Flag
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that's cute and sad at the same time- it's hard being little. I'm sure you did a good job of reassuring him. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:44 AM Flag
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The hard part in the whole thing was I didn't want to "reassure" him of anything really. I didn't want to stigmatize being a "sissy" in the old un-PC sense of "sissy-ness" but I also didn't really know how to answer. (Truth is he is not a boy-ish tough guy.) And I was caught kind of flat footed. I discussed with him that words like "sissy" are used to be mean and that is not something we do in our family. Then we talked about how silly it is to say things like cooking or dancing or drawing or writing are girl things or boy things. It would be so much easier if kids came with instructions. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:55 AM Flag
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didn't mean to suggest that you would reinforce the "sissy" bit- just that I'm sure you did your best to make him understand that he's great just the way he is. i know a dad who taught his 2 yr old to say "I a wuss" everytime he cried - dad thought it was funny. i thought it was about the saddest thing I'd ever heard. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:04 PM Flag
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Sorry. Yeah, it was/is a tough line to walk. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:08 PM Flag
[ - ] I feel so frustrated and guilty. We are having a really hard time putting our nearly 4 year old to sleep at night. No matter how early we start the process he is really making it super difficult for us--insisting on changing toothpastes 2 or 3 times, running around while we try to get his pajamas on, etc. We both work full time but spend our weekends with him and his brother and come home at a reasonable time in the evening (6:30 pm). What makes it worse it that he behaves for his nanny and in school so it's clearly a problem with me as a mom. (Not trying for sympathy but I'm at my wits end.) Bedtime includes a bath, teeth brushing, reading a few stories, and lying down with him until he falls asleep. (Yes, I know Dr. Ferber would disapprove but our child was adopted at birth and are very serious about attachment.) When our little one strings the bed time along, I get frustrated and angry thinking about how I'm ignoring the older one (nearly 11) and not getting any down time (or time to pay the bills, etc.) and then I start yelling. I know this is counterproductive (and mean) but I feel like nothing is working--saying no cartoons the next day, taking away toys, etc. Help! 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:31 AM Flag
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have you tried just shutting bedtime down, meaning, if he makes a fuss about the toothpaste, its straight to bed in whatever he's wearing right then, with no books, etc. just threatening this works with my 3yo so i've never had to actually try it, so i can't make any promises... also, btw, dd is so much more difficult with me than with anyone else - babysitter, school, even dh. its not that you are the problem but that kids have a special relationship with their mothers and test them more. good luck! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:34 AM Flag
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This is not a problem with you as a mom. It's GOOD that he behaves at school and with the nanny. If he were misbehaving everywhere that would be a problem. Psychologically and developmentally it's normal for a child to save the worst behavior for the person with whom he feels most comfortable. He's going to test you b/c he knows you will always love him. Bedtime issues are rough but I would suggest a reward chart. Make a list (or use pictures) of everything that has to be done for bedtime. If it's all done within a certain amount of time (30 mins?) he gets a sticker. After a week he gets a prize. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:36 AM Flag
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I say ditto on the reward chart but try a little of what or said: include a punishment. Ds has to "earn" his books. If he brushes his teeth, he gets a book. Puts on his pajamas he gets another. If he doesn't do any of the above, he goes to bed without books. But you have to be firm and consistent with this. Then if he's great all the way through, stickers and prizes. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:52 AM Flag
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Hello everyone, I tried the stickers route and it worked like a charm. The incentive was enough to get him to cooperate and the plan made me feel calm and act in a more patient manner. At the end of the week if he has 7 stickers, he will get to go the dollar store and pick out a small trinket. Thanks again! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:39 PM Flag
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You need consistency. He knows he can string you along and he's playing you. Try the following: tell ds the bedtime routine, ask him to repeat it, when he does not complete the activity or tries to string it out, tell him he can either X (brush teeth, lay down, etc.) or he can sit in time out and then X. Actually give him a time out without further warning, if necessary. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:36 AM Flag
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np: i don't like this idea since it accomplishes his goal of stringing bedtime along. bedtime is the one time of day i *don't* use time outs. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:38 AM Flag
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Thanks, everyone, I'll try what you suggest. I think some combination of use of the reward chart and just stopping what I'm doing and saying "you're going to bed" calmy may work. My mistake is that even when I lay down the law, I alwasy seem to back down so he is definitely playing me. If I can stay calm and determined not to back down, I think it may work. Sadly, whenever I try to put my child in time out he does not stay. When I've tried to move him to the time out chair, it becomes a contest of wills and I get really angry and afraid that I'll be tempted to spank him (which I don't think is a good idea). So, just stopping the fun and stopping the bargaining process I think may work. Will report back in the next few days. Thx. again. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:29 PM Flag
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good luck! it is so hard but try to stick to it! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:33 PM Flag
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This used to be the case with our son, i would put him to sleep for hours, as he would find any excuse to run around, regardless of what threats I used to beg for him to come back to bed. Then I started putting him to bed closer to the time when he actually fell asleep, and not the 'normal' time of when kids should go to sleep. It worked like magic - he falls asleep right after I read to him for a bit, without any resistance. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:42 AM Flag
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Interesting--maybe he [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:30 PM Flag
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i think that he's probably trying to extend the time he spends with you. also, i find ds (also 4 yo) gets more tired in the summer - what with being outside all day and swimming some days - and probably should actually be going to bed EARLIER so as not to get into that super tired and cranky phase. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:42 PM Flag
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The sticker chart worked for me to get both dcs back in to their beds - 5 stars meant a trip to Build-a-Bear. I hate Build-a-Bear - but it worked. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:18 PM Flag
[ - ] Can anyone recommend a good pediatric dermatologist? My 6 month old has bad eczema. Thanks! 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Newborn 06.30.08, 11:30 AM Flag
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ask PED. My dd had bad eczema but my Ped treated her [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:31 AM Flag
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pediatrician who covers for my dc's, specializes in excema and even has her own line of products. - natalie geary 80's between mad and 5th [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 11:33 AM Flag
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Maria Garzon Columbia - also has an office on E60th [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:20 PM Flag
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Don't have a specific name for you, but NYU dermatology dept is generally known to be the best in the city. Call and ask for a derm who specializes in children. My ds saw a pediatric derm there and she immediately recognized his issue and gave great advice (ds's ped didn't know what the problem was) -- she has since moved to NJ though. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:21 PM Flag
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