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Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] My 5 yo niece just broke her leg and will be in a cast for (probably) the rest of the summer. Need gift suggestions for her--something fun she can do inside. She's not into the princess scene. Any ideas? 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:40 PM Flag
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activity books, puzzles, dvds, jewelry making kits, art supplies, educational computer games [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:42 PM Flag
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Thanks. I'd rather get her one biggish gift than a lot of little ones. I got her a jewelry making kit for Christmas. Any other ideas? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:44 PM Flag
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There are video games that hook up to the tv. You could get the main system and a bunch of educational games. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:46 PM Flag
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Fimo or sculpey clay so she can make things for the dollhouse you get her to go along with it (this was the gift I got when I was ill for an entire summer at age 6) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:46 PM Flag
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I'd love to do this, but she has her mom's dollhouse from when she was little....maybe I'll ask her mom about new furniture or something though. Thanks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:52 PM Flag
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Ask about furniture, new "family", and get the fimo - it is great stuff and she can make all kinds of things with it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:54 PM Flag
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Thanks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:55 PM Flag
[ - ] I have to confess this somewhere. We were just invited to the weekend house of friends of dh's with tons of money and I went and bought a new, pricey swimsuit b/c mine are all from Old Navy and fit badly. Embarrassed to discover I care this much....sigh. 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:39 PM Flag
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that is just silly. We make loads of money and I was wearing a target swimsuit that I used to wear while 9mos pg to the pool this summer until my dh told me it was really indecent. So I went to Lands End and bought one on sale. Moral of the story: you probably care way more than they do [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:45 PM Flag
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I know. But the DW has amazing clothes, always. I always envy her and guess I also feel like maybe it's time to dress a little more grown-up. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:49 PM Flag
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np: yes, some people with lots of money don't care about clothing, but others DO and if you have to be around the ones that DO, it does make you feel better to wear nice things. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:18 PM Flag
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Be happy for yourself. So you want to look nice. There is nothing wrong with that and I hope DH comments on how pretty you look. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:45 PM Flag
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A girlfriend always tells me that nobidy cares what I'm wearing but me and I'm sure she is right (she usually is!) but if you feel good in the new suit, enjoy it ! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:46 PM Flag
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Don't be embarassed that you want to look great. You'd buy a new dress if the occasion warranted it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:07 PM Flag
[ - ] Can someone tell me about Pelham/Pelham Manor? schools? neighborhoods? people? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:36 PM Flag
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Search the board--I asked this a while back. What I took away: high taxes, good (but increasingly crowded) schools, nice town, good commute, relatively affordable real estate. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:42 PM Flag
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thanks. would love to hear from soemone who lives there. I will be home with my kids and I am wondering about the social life too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:49 PM Flag
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Yeah, I don't know anything about that. Would love to know too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:51 PM Flag
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i live there if you are watching this. feel free to ask any questions... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 03:28 PM Flag
[ - ] Does anybody know coming Anderson and Nest are diverse(AA/Asian?hispanic)? I wonder DOE knew DC's racial status when they picked? 55 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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NY Schools 07.01.08, 01:28 PM Flag
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english, please [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:30 PM Flag
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Why are you so sure they knew? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:31 PM Flag
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they didn't. people are just shocked that there are some smart dcs who aren't white, i guess. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:32 PM Flag
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who was shocked? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:35 PM Flag
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people keep posting about this over and over. gosh, i was so surprised to see the anderson class was so diverse! do you think they hand-picked all the non-white dcs???? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:45 PM Flag
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Well, get over it and get over your racist attitudes as well. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:48 PM Flag
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MY racist attitude? i'm the one who isn't shocked at all that the class is so diverse. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:50 PM Flag
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Sorry, but the statement above that asks if the non-white kids were hand-picked doesn't sound that open minded to me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:56 PM Flag
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um, i was QUOTING the other posts. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:57 PM Flag
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didn't see any quote marks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:59 PM Flag
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you just don't get obvious sarcasm. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:01 PM Flag
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It wasn't obvious. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:02 PM Flag
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here on ub, multiple question marks and words like gosh and golly tend to indicate sarcasm. you should be a little more careful about throwing around words like racist. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:03 PM Flag
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Simple punctuation would have saved you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:03 PM Flag
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whatever. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:04 PM Flag
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it was clear what she was saying [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:05 PM Flag
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np OR wrote "people keep posting about this over and over." The rest of us knew that what followed was a "quote." No quote marks needed, Nelly. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:04 PM Flag
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ty. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:05 PM Flag
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np. Don't worry, it was completely obvious you were quoting another conversation. The poster either has a reading comprehension problem or just wants to pick a fight. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:45 PM Flag
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No, but people like you feel free to make those kinds of baseless accusations whenever this topic comes up. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:36 PM Flag
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do you (or they) realize how utterly racist that is? It's amazing what comes out in these G&T conversations. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:42 PM Flag
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???? please write a legible post [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:32 PM Flag
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Anderson's incoming K class is more diverse than I had expected. Lots of mixed race kids, and families from 4 of the 5 boroughs. I don't really how much info the DOE had on the kids (the G&T testing forms themselves only asked if you wanted the test available in a language other than English, not what racial/ethnic group your kid is in, but maybe the DOE had other info from universal preK data collected from preschools? I really don't know). It's also possible that the pool of kids in the lottery were incredibly diverse .... not surprising given it's NYC. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:33 PM Flag
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How do you know this info? Do you have a class list? I did not see this at the new class events [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:36 PM Flag
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Don't have a class list yet, I don't think they have been sent out. I'm describing what I observed of the kids at the orientation events last week. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:37 PM Flag
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anyone know when the class lists will be coming out? hopefully before september. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:46 PM Flag
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35 girls and 15 boys isn't so diverse [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:38 PM Flag
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The OP's question was about racial diversity, not gender. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:38 PM Flag
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^^^ Oh, and I believe the correct # is 33 girls, 17 boys. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:39 PM Flag
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i thought anderson was always pretty diverse, or do people just assume they corrected for race at the onsite? i find the whole insinuation kind of offensive. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:47 PM Flag
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only diverse in the last 2 years since the olsat. I think the SB/ERB model kept a lot of diverse kids from applying. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:48 PM Flag
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so did they hire child actors and their parents for the video they showed at the open house? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:50 PM Flag
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ask anyone on UWS. anderson has been very white. if you look at the upper grades you will seee that I am correct. not criticizing. it is what it is. also, as for kids in the video, I doubt they hired anyone, but would not be surprised if they put them in for more shots to emphasize diversity. happened at our school. the website looks like a veritible rainbow, when in fact there are about 5 kids of color in the whole school. person creaating the website chose to put 1-3 of them in every shot. not uncommon imo. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:53 PM Flag
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but there was a southeast asian mom talking about how the reason she chose anderson was because she loved how diverse it was. was she lying? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:55 PM Flag
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more diverse than some schools perhaps. not that diverse in upper grades. what can I say? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:58 PM Flag
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but if the lower grades are diverse, why should anyone be surprised that this year's class is as well? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:59 PM Flag
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I am not surprised, and I am glad for it. seems the citywides would be diverse because they pull from all of NYC. queens, brookly, etc. there are many pockets of people in these areas who went into the pool. district G&Ts should reflect the district or nabe they are in. makes total sense. don't know why it would be a mystery. also, olsat more accessible than erb/sb [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:02 PM Flag
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NP: I was surprised by the diversity because such large numbers of high scoring kids came from D2 and D3... now I'm not saying that only white kids live in those Districts, but compared to many other Districts, D2 & D3 are probably predominantly white. So I assumed the class would be skewed in that direction. Pleasantly surprised that it is not! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:06 PM Flag
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No, she wasn't. The diversity was never just by the DOE's definition which is just black & hispanic. (No, they don't count Asians). I know the woman from the video. She was referring to the fact that many dc's have parents who are immigrants countries and many cultures are represented by the student body. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:59 PM Flag
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sorry...bad edit...delete "countries". [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:00 PM Flag
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but this woman offers obvious visual diversity, which is what the anderson moms who come here expressing such surprise are responding to. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:02 PM Flag
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Well, they need to stop being so surprised. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:03 PM Flag
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goodness, you are obtuse, or concrete, or something. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:07 PM Flag
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Upper elementary is always less diverse because lower income families of color move out of NYC to buy homes that are affordable in more distant 'burbs. Then the classes become very diverse again in middle school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 06:21 PM Flag
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That video is so old! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:59 PM Flag
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so the school has gotten LESS diverse? i'm confused. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:00 PM Flag
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No, my comment was misplaced. Just a random observation about that video and how dated it was, that's all. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:02 PM Flag
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The current 1st grade is the most diverse in the school..about 40% non white. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:02 PM Flag
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np. It's very simple to hand pick the students and parents who will appear in a school's promotional materials. Most schools do this to give the appearance of greater diversity than really exists. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:49 PM Flag
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Not true. The accepted kids were always a diverse bunch, but there was often overlap there with private schools and Hunter, which are K-12. Getting the accepted kids of color to enroll when they had other wonderful options was always the challenge. Things started to improve when Anderson became a K-8. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:52 PM Flag
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mc/wealthy diversity kids have many private options, or did up until recently. as that pool has grown and tuition has increased, everyone is now looking at good publics like anderson. not everyone, but many. also, many would rather have anderson than a lower tier private, for status reasons. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:57 PM Flag
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This past year's K class was also incredibly diverse and the incoming class seemed pretty mixed. Much more than our zoned school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:08 PM Flag
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Anderson's diversity had been rising steadily over the past 5 years. You don't know your stats (signed Anderson mom who spent lots of time doing recruiting to ensure diversity.) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 06:20 PM Flag
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Wow, you're reading a lot into the so-called "insinuation." [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:00 PM Flag
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Three cheers for diversity!!! As UB moms we really need to open our minds and embrace the future. We can keep sticking our heads up our you know whats. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:29 PM Flag
[ - ] My sister just lost her 5th baby. I am so sad for her but don't know what to say anymore other than being supportive. She keeps getting pregnant and losing the baby, and will not consider other options. Obv it is not the time to talk about them now, but anyone been through this that can offer some wisdom? 47 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:21 PM Flag
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has she carried any to term? how faralong is she when this happens, or has it varied greatly? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:48 PM Flag
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No, she hasn't carried any to term. She has been between 12-20 weeks each time [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:48 PM Flag
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I am so sorry for her. Im sure there is nothing new to say that you havnt already. just be there for her, be kind to her. She needs to process this and figure out what she wants to do. DO they have any idea of why this has happened? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:51 PM Flag
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see below... I am so sad for her (and this is really horrible timing since we were expecting dcs within a month of each other, I am 12 wks pg and she miscarried at 16wks). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:52 PM Flag
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Has she seen an RE? Done the workup for recurrent miscarriage? I did this after 3 miscarriages and a lot of intervention (including IVF) have gone on to have 2 kids. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:50 PM Flag
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Yes, seen an RE and conceived the last 2 on IVF... apparently she has a condition that causes her to miscarry late because her body sees the fetus as parasytic. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:51 PM Flag
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is she willing to consider a surrogate? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:54 PM Flag
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I don't think so. I have offered (after the last m/c) but she said no [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:54 PM Flag
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that is generous of you. is there a chance of her carrying to term w this condition? i guess there must be if RE is doing IVF. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:00 PM Flag
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The condition was only diagnosed after the last m/c (2nd pg with RE). I think the chances are VERY slight. I would absolutely be a surrogate for her, and I think our other sister would too (she is younger and hasn't had kids yet though, I am pg with my first) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:02 PM Flag
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maybe she will reconsider her options now that she has that diagnosis, but it might take time. good luck to all of you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:06 PM Flag
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thanks, that is what I am thinking [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:06 PM Flag
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That's awful--a much more complicated diagnosis than my own. I will say that, for me, I really didn't want advice from fertile people or people who hadn't had a lick of trouble having kids. I saw a therapist and that helped me a lot. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:55 PM Flag
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I have not given advice (don't know what advice I would give). She has been in therapy for ages, so I'm sure they're addressing this [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:56 PM Flag
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But your post was asking about other options....I'm not sure you're the person to suggest those options. I'm sure her RE and therapist have discussed them. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:58 PM Flag
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My post was really about what I could say to her or if anyone had been through this how they coped/what advice they got [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:00 PM Flag
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np how about surrogate and implant embryo of her/DH? V. traumatic to keep losing babies. Poor thing. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:55 PM Flag
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NNP: She knows the options at this point. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:57 PM Flag
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np: Are there any kinds of medications that could help? I can't imagine she could keep putting her body through this, let alone her mind. So sorry. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:56 PM Flag
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I don't know about medications... I imagine they've tried most things at this point. It isn't really a RE issue either because she gets pg without much trouble... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:01 PM Flag
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Well, either an RE or a maternal-fetal specialist. This must be wreaking havoc on her body, for it to consider itself under attack all the time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:02 PM Flag
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I will see if a m-f specialist has been consulted... not sure [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:06 PM Flag
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that is awful for her and awful for you too. what does your BIL say ? is he interested in other options ? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:58 PM Flag
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My BIL is not the talkative type. I know it is v hard for him and he is willing to look into adoption, but my sister was adopted and has "issues" with that so she doesn't want to adopt [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:59 PM Flag
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np: Their marriage will be in tatters if the doctors can't figure something out or she thinks of alternate routes to becoming a parent. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:00 PM Flag
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op - what a nice thing to say. Seriously, keep it to yourself. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:01 PM Flag
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Sorry, I speak from experience, but it came out all wrong. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:03 PM Flag
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ok, I understand [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:04 PM Flag
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I see she's seeing a therapist, that helped me and my DH ended up at one too. He just couldn't bear to see me go through this again, and was also worrying about what would happen if I made it into the barely-viable stage and the baby was very ill. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:06 PM Flag
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I'm sorry you had to go through that. Do you have healthy dc now? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:07 PM Flag
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Yes, I do - two. They figured out a way to get me through pretty well with #1 (my 5th pg), and I got cocky and went for #2. He barely got to 35 weeks and was in bad shape because of my crappy uterus. So grateful he's healthy now, but my selfishness is hard to think of now and was a source of stress between me and DH. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:10 PM Flag
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stop beating yourself up and enjoy your dcs! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:11 PM Flag
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I hope your sister finds a solution - the new medical advances are astonishing. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:15 PM Flag
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This reminds me of a couple we are friendly with. They are not miscarrying, but have had no luck for almost 4 years now with IVF. They start and stop and so on. In this couple it is the man who is adament that they will have "Their own" children. She just wants a child, he will not consider adoption. It is a sad thing. I'm also sorry that this must hamper your joy at your own pregnancy... that sucks too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:01 PM Flag
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I'm so not thinking about myself at this point... I just feel so badly for her. I think I can understand her issue about not wanting to adopt, though she had a great family who love her as if she was naturally part of it, but hopefully she will come around to that or surrogacy. I think the pain is just too great atm [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:03 PM Flag
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you are obviously a good sister. good luck to both of you. I don't understand what you wrote about adoption though ? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:05 PM Flag
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My sister was adopted (dad had 5 boys, didn't think he could have a girl, so they adopted my sister, then he remarried a few years later and had 2 more girls with my mom...) so she doesn't want to adopt herself [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:06 PM Flag
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OH. That's interesting though. I would have thought that she would be Ok with the idea - maybe not her first choice - but not wanting to adopt after seeing how great it can be wouldn't be what I would have expected. Then again, what the hell do I know ?! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:08 PM Flag
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I don't really understand it either... I think somehow deep down she feels like she was less "wanted" because her parents divorced when she was a toddler and then our dad had 2 more girls. It is so far from the truth though - our dad ADORES her, always has [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:09 PM Flag
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np: maybe she would be better with an open adoption situation? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:11 PM Flag
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np - open adoption is REALLY difficult... we went through it and I never would again. That year of time in which db's birthmom could change her mind was HELL [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:12 PM Flag
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is that a requirement for open adoption? i thought all newborn adoptions had a period of time (varying by state) where a birth parent could change their mind? i have an acquaintance who has done both kinds (2 of each) and has been far happier with the open adoptions situation and thinks those kids are more comfortable with adoption as a result. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:15 PM Flag
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where we were (CO) it was the requirement. It was AWFUL and our ds has a lot of issues stemming from it. We didn't adopt him until 15mo (his 13yo mother had thought she wanted to keep him, then changed her mind) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:18 PM Flag
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but woudl this not ahve been the case for a closed adoption? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:20 PM Flag
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I have two friends who adopted newborns in open adoptions and they both got the babies in the hospital. In one case it took a year to complete the paperwork but the child lived with them that whole time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:21 PM Flag
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As others said, that is not the case with every state, or all adoptions. We adopted both of our kids domestically, as newborns. Both adoptions are on the openness spectrum. Once the parental rights were terminated (w/in the first weeks after birth) there was not a concern about birth parents reclaiming the children. And because they were open adoptions, we were able to talk to each other and be clear about where we stood. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 08:49 PM Flag
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It sounds like she has anti-phospholipid syndrome. She needs to see a good rheumatologist or OB/GYN who specialized in this area. With close follow-up she should be able to carry to term. She needs a good MD!!! Chances for full term pregnancy are GOOD if she has not had appropriate care thus far. Signed, BTDT [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 08:45 PM Flag
[ - ] What is a typical feeding schedule for an 8 week old. Every 2 hours? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Expecting 07.01.08, 01:18 PM Flag
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Mine was every 3 hours at that age. Stopped eating during the night at 3 months on the dot. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:26 PM Flag
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every three hours would be better [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:27 PM Flag
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Ive only heard of that in very young babies that arent gaining enough. should be more like 3 hrs [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:53 PM Flag
[ - ] Are there any otc drugs (for adults) to help with social anxiety? 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 07.01.08, 01:16 PM Flag
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^^oops, didn't mean to post on schools board. sorry [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:17 PM Flag
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Bach's Rescue Remedy. Glass of wine. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:17 PM Flag
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Boiron makes some calming things [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:17 PM Flag
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and Bach's Rescue Remedy is good... of course, its mostly alcohol, which works too! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:18 PM Flag
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this does it for me: http://www.bourbonenthusiast.com/forum/DBvd.php?id=95&task=displaybottling [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:22 PM Flag
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Just go to a dr and get a prescription. If it's really social anxiety, which is a serious syndrome, you shouldn't self-medicate. Go for the Lexapro or Welbutrin or something, under the care and monitoring of a doctor with the right blood tests, etc. Lots of otcs like valerian and st john's wort can have just as many side effects. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 11:21 AM Flag
[ - ] Can someone tell me about the Harbor Heights neighborhood in Mamaroneck? Thanks! 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Toddler 07.01.08, 01:12 PM Flag
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That sounds like it's near the water. My friend lives near that golf club, Winged Foot, and likes it there but it's not a walking neighborhood. Happy with the elementary school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:46 PM Flag
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No it is not near the water, just on higher ground, they may be able to see the harbor from there but I am not sure. The neighborhoods on the water are Orienta and Shore Acres. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 07:41 AM Flag
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Harbor Heights is supposed to be a nice family friendly neighborhood, I haven't been there but heard its nice and there's a local playground I think. You should also check out the Rye Neck part of Mamaroneck (south of Halstead avenue) it is also nice there on streets like and the homes are zoned for Rye Neck schools which is a small blue ribbon school district with a private school feel. Heathcote Hill is another nice neighborhood, zoned for Mamaroneck school district which is also a good school district. Good luck!. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 07:39 AM Flag
[ - ] meet dave? just saw an ad for eddie murphy movie coming out next week...never heard of it before, but it looks dumber than speed racer, if that's imaginable 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:10 PM Flag
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how many characters does Eddie play this time? I can't help but wonder- is he such a huge douchebag that nobody will work with him so he has to be the Mom, the cousin, the brother and half the cast? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:25 PM Flag
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lol [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:39 PM Flag
[ - ] My single friends have almost disappeared since I had my db and it's been really sad for me but I have made friends with people with kids. Now one single friend is having a party for july 4th as are some of my mom friends who have been there for me. i feel like if i don't go to the single friends house the friendship will contuinue to falter but i'd kinda rather go to the party of the people who have been there for me through this stressful time (single mom with a 7mo). WWYD? 30 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:09 PM Flag
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Go where you'll be happier & more comfortable. You should cultivate relationships with the people in your life that are there for you & support you. It sounds like that's your "new" friends. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:11 PM Flag
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Go to the party which you RSVPd first. You know, maybe your single friends feel you have lost interest in them since you became a mom. Might work both ways. People who don't have babies do not know how stressful and/ or isolating it can be. Maybe they feel you seem to have moved on from them. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:13 PM Flag
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Did your friends really disappear or did you disappear from your friends? I was in a similar situation as you and one of my single girlfriends actually told me that she and our other friends thought I was too busy and had other priorities than spending time with them, but whenever I was ready or free they'd love to see me. Sounds like your friend who invited you to her party wants to make that gesture [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:14 PM Flag
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OP: I have tried countless times to get together but I, of course, have my baby with me and they have chosen not to get together for whatever reason. This party is, of course, convenient to them so they asked me. I have pretty much stopped asking them to get together now so we are both moving on I guess. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:19 PM Flag
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Could you leave your baby at home with her/ his father, babysitter etc while you go and meet single friends? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:20 PM Flag
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you have no childcare options? I can understand wanting to have the baby with you, but don't you need a break sometimes? Wouldn't single girlfriend time be best sans baby? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:22 PM Flag
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i'm a single mom and yes, sometimes I can have a sitter but on the weekends is the time I have with him as I work during the week and he's with a nanny during the day. i have to say to spend $15/he for people who have really deserted me during my time of need doesn't feel right to me so i' [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:25 PM Flag
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Well, you've answered your own "problem" then. Go to the party with your new friends and write off the others as history [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:25 PM Flag
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Well, it sounds like you've made up your mind, so I'm not sure why you asked the question. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:26 PM Flag
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cause i feel sad about it and want to make sure my emotions aren't getting the better of me. need another person's pov, so it's been helpful to hear people's thoughts. will probably go to the single friends party cause i said i would first and that's only right. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:28 PM Flag
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they wouldn't know "why" you canceled if you do - remember, you've clearly shown them that your only priority is your kid and if you cancel because you lie and say he's sick, how would they know the difference? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:32 PM Flag
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i just no longer think it's fair that i have to make all the concessions to get together when it's much easier for them to make a plan to see me than I to get to them. they don't have to spend money on sitter, manuever naps, etc... i have made it very clear when i am free and no one is biting. i feel ostracized for having a kid really. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:27 PM Flag
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Look, if you want to keep up with them, you need to make an effort to see them withOUT your son. Nothing kills a girls' day/night out like someone else's baby. It's not personal - it's universal. If you can't or don't want to do this, then write them off and hang out with your new friends. But old friends are worth fighting for. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:30 PM Flag
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this is such a nasty attitude to have. i dropped my friends who had this mentality after i had my DS and am happier for it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:38 PM Flag
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op: thanks, i appreciate hearing that. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:56 PM Flag
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What did you think would happen? Seriously? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:30 PM Flag
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op: i thought they would stick around and be there for me LIKE THEY SAID THEY WOULD DURING MY PREGNANCY. That's what I thought. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:32 PM Flag
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I know a few single mothers who think they can rely on their friends the way those of us who are married/in relationships do on their husbands/sos. It doesn't work like that. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:33 PM Flag
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op: i see that now! i take full responsibility for thinking things would be different. i am not rich - babysitters a few tinmes a week is not a luxury i can afford but i do think they can come to my house when the kids is asleep. i just guess people don't do that - i did with my friends who had babies. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:35 PM Flag
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well then, you're clearly a MUCH better person than everyone else [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:36 PM Flag
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OP; well, in this regard yes i am. i stuck by my feriends when they had kids. i really didn't think twice about it and it didn;t prepare me for when it was going to happen to me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:39 PM Flag
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The only people who stick around after a baby is born, if yr lucky, are the baby's parents, and the parents' parents. Apart from that, people get on with their own lives, look forward to seeing you when you recover from the childbirth and the trauma of the first six weeks, and are happy to admire photos for perhaps five mins. I think your expectations of friends are too high. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:34 PM Flag
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OP; i agree. i believed them when they said they'd hang around. perhaps they didn't know themselves. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:36 PM Flag
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itd. my childless friends (excpet for a couple who are dealing with infertility) did not "go away" after i had db. our relationship changed and we made adjustments, but they are still there for me. but i am talking FRIENDS not social acquaintances. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:40 PM Flag
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op: these were close friends thast's why it's so shocking. not acquaintences at all. granted some friends did dtick around but they tend to be gay men and women interestingly. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:54 PM Flag
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Are you expecting single straight MALE friends to be more supportive? Forget it. DH sees his friends twice a year at this point and they've maybe met DS twice and he's 4 yo. I assumed you were talking about girlfriends. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:08 PM Flag
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np: i am not sure single and childless people understand what that entails. pick the single friend you are closest to. tell her, "i miss you and i really want to hang out with you. it's difficult and expensive for me to get a sitter, but do you think you would like to come over and hang out one night after db goes to bed?" my best single friend was totally up for that. i'd put db to bed at 7:30pm and then we'd stay up and chat and have wine, etc. don't always go for the group outing - that one is harder. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:36 PM Flag
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op: I've said that and asked that so many times. it's happened maybe once or twice in 8 months. perhaps these friends aren't as good as I thought. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:40 PM Flag
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Now you have the answer as to why your single friends don't want to hang out with you and the friendship is dwindling [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:34 PM Flag
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OP: Oh I've known I just find it really sad. I thought these friends were a little above the stereotype. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:37 PM Flag
[ - ] RE saw what he thought was a dermoid cyst on US 2 wks ago and MRI today confirmed it (always a chance it's somethng worse, but radiologist said didn't look like it). Anyone had this? How is it, it wasn't on any US up til now? Lat US was 2 mos ago and it wasn't there. WTF? I'm really worried. 17 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:08 PM Flag
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don't worry. 80% of any kind of suspicious breast lump turns out to be benign. When do you get results from MRI? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:43 PM Flag
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It's an ovarian dermoid cyst - they think. Had MRI today and that's what they said. I asked point blank if it could be anything else and radiologist said, well thats what it looks like, but unless you take it out, there's no way to know. Great. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:51 PM Flag
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np: Cousin had one of these - they can grow really fast so maybe that's why they didn't see it last time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:14 PM Flag
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op; Really? THis was not eviden t2 mos ago and now is there. I'm so freaked. Dr said unlikely it could grow that fast, must've missed it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 03:19 PM Flag
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my cousin had one of those and it was benign, but large and needed to be removed. she lost the ovary, but went on to have 3 dcs. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:04 PM Flag
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how big? yikes. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:11 PM Flag
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did it have teeth and hair ?! those are freaky !! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:16 PM Flag
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np: I love that Margaret Atwood story about the dermoid cyst. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:17 PM Flag
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I'd be afraid to read it ! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:19 PM Flag
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You should - it's in her book Wilderness Tips, called Hairball. It's mostly about her relationship with her married boyfriend, and it's very witty and darkly funny. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:20 PM Flag
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I shall look for it then. I like witty and dark. In books and men ! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:22 PM Flag
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yes! it did have teeth and hair. gross. I'm not sure how big it was. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:21 PM Flag
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AAARRRRRRGGGGHHHHH !!! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:22 PM Flag
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I had 2 of these, both had to be surgically removed. I think if they get to be 5.5-6 cm is when they would recommend taking them out because you are at risk for twisting the ovary (what happened to me) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:26 PM Flag
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I had a dermoid, had it removed-it was nothing. They can tell from the sono/MRI what it is pretty clearly (they have cartiledge, hair, teeth and bones!) They can never tell you anything 100% until they remove it and test it, but they know. DO NOT worry. BTDT. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 09:46 AM Flag
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ps-they grow very quickly which is why they usually remove them. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 09:46 AM Flag
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what signs/symptoms did you have? any pain or swelling? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 09:59 AM Flag
[ - ] Dh & I want to visit Mystic, CT this month but are looking for a hotel/motel that would have a large room (maybe a suite?) that we can put the kids in at night while they sleep but am having trouble finding anything. I would settle for renting a coop or something but don't have any contacts - any recs for hotel or other? 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 07.01.08, 01:06 PM Flag
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mystic is boring [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:09 PM Flag
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that is helpful, anyone else? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:12 PM Flag
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crickets here. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:17 PM Flag
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We stayed at in a suite at the hotel across the street from the acquarium Mystic Hilton I think. Check out tripadvisor.com [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:22 PM Flag
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The Mystic Marriott probably has suites [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:01 PM Flag
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vrbo.com [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:10 PM Flag
[ - ] Help please. What time does your 9mo go to sleep at night and does he/she still feed during the night? TIA! 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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Newborn 07.01.08, 01:05 PM Flag
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well, i have a 7.5 month old but i can tell you he hasn't eaten during the night for almost 3 months. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:10 PM Flag
[ - ] cooking moms: if I don't have an egg what else can I add to meatloaf? TIA! 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:03 PM Flag
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Cottage cheese. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:11 PM Flag
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OP: NOOOOO! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:25 PM Flag
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Oops, meant to type NP! Sorry! No way I would add cottage cheese to bind meatloaf. You'll be alright without egg. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:26 PM Flag
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Why not? I use it in burgers. You can't taste it plus it keeps them moist. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:28 PM Flag
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ricotta [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:26 PM Flag
[ - ] 11mo likes to stay up late and get overstimulating just by having us around. She only goes to bed now when she's totally exhausted. Rocking, etc. don't work. Any suggestions? Post 9p.m. can get really late. 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:02 PM Flag
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Put her to bed MUCH earlier, like 7 or 8. That is the Weissbluth/ "Healthy Sleep Habits" [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:04 PM Flag
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and let her cio! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:05 PM Flag
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When 8pm rolls around, put her in her crib and leave her there. If you can cope with the screaming for a couple of nights, you are in with a good chance that she will have adjusted to a more age-appropriate sleep pattern. Good luck. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:04 PM Flag
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