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Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] Nanny's bday is coming up. New to this. What do "most people" do? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:54 AM Flag
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Card from child with $50 cash or gift card. Small cake with child and nanny. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 12:33 PM Flag
[ - ] Many people I know rent a studio in a great zone for 6 months, get into the school and then cancel their lease. In our highly desired zoned public at least 25% of the students live out of zone (as per the Directory). It's a legal trick 29 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 07.01.08, 11:51 AM Flag
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if we had not been admitted to NEST we would have done the same. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:55 AM Flag
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though we would have rented a 2bedroom and actually moved there to live. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 12:00 PM Flag
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you suck. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:01 PM Flag
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that only people of means can afford to do. it's still wrong. I swear, today's society is bereft of any ethical conscience [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:56 AM Flag
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Honestly, I didn't know that this was legal. Isn't it true that in the suburbs, if you move- then your kids also switch schools? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 12:00 PM Flag
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I'm not so sure that it is legal. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 12:05 PM Flag
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it's legal. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 12:42 PM Flag
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np: It depends on how long you live at that address. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:05 PM Flag
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you have to have lived there for long enough to have received a con ed bill by the day you register and you have to live there the first day of school. i'm not sure you have to be there for any longer than that. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:10 PM Flag
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That is not correct. That may be enough to get over, but there are length of residence requirements. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:16 PM Flag
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actually - there is no stated length of time in nyc. You have to be there the first day of first grade. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 06:46 AM Flag
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Actually they've changed it to sometime during your K year now. You don't have to stay through 1st grade anymore. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 11:12 AM Flag
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no, not true. you have to live there when you register. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 11:34 AM Flag
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You have to live there when you register and on the first day of school. You can't register and then move before school starts. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 11:36 AM Flag
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you actually have to live there, though. presumably a family is not going to actually live in a studio. they are renting it merely for the address, not to inhabit. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:12 PM Flag
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Whatever. I will never understand why people go through all that trouble for any public. So foolish. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:09 PM Flag
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well la-di-da [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:33 PM Flag
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wouldn't private school just be cheaper? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:16 PM Flag
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5 years of tuition vs. 6 months of rent? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:24 PM Flag
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at least it is LEGAL [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:24 PM Flag
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this is a joke, right? i year in public for 1 child is $30K. I'm pretty sure you can get a studio in a good district for less than $2.5K/month - so even if you pay it for the whole year of the lease, you're better off. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:26 PM Flag
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of course it was a joke. But renting a sham studio (btw - how does a family manage to "live" in a studio?) is so dishonest if you can afford to do that you should be able to afford to send your kids to private [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:35 PM Flag
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i don't disagree that it is dishonest - OTOH, I'm not sure waht affording a less expensive dishonest option has to do with affording a FAR FAR more expensive honest one. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:38 PM Flag
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I know a mom, dad and child that live in a studio. It's not really that hard. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 06:47 AM Flag
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uh- you have to GET IN to a private school. And this year's admissions are even worse than last year. I would be willing to pay - but I guess my family just wasn't cool/rich/sophisticated/pleasant enough for any of the schools we applied to. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:41 AM Flag
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most of the "good" publics you now have to GET IN to as well [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:45 AM Flag
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To the OP: you imply that 25% of the students are out of zone because of some kind of scam. That is not true -- the majority of those out of zone likely lived legitimately in the zone at some point or were given a variance. Don't forget that all schools take NCLB kids and that many great schools had seats for out of zone kids a few years ago. Once a family has one child in the school, all siblings can go no matter where they live. (So if #1 lived in zone for 1st grade and then family moves, #2, #3, etc even if 5-6 years younger can go.) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:46 AM Flag
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No, siblings are no longer guaranteed a spot at an older sibs school. the way the lottery works, they usually get one, but there is no guarantee at all. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 11:15 AM Flag
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No, it's not a legal trick. It must be your PRIMARY RESIDENCE. The child and the legal guardian must live there most of the time, and the legal guardian must have all tax and payroll documents use that address. Many people don't actually live there, but that makes it just as illegal/sneaky as using a friend's address. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 11:14 AM Flag
[ - ] Will have nuchal tomorrow. When do you get next testing for quad screening? What week? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Expecting 07.01.08, 11:49 AM Flag
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I got the nuchal and the blood test the same day, at 12 weeks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:53 AM Flag
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the 2nd set of blood tests are 3 weeks later. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:54 AM Flag
[ - ] Will be 12 weeks pregnant with #2 on Thursday. Feel like I'm starting to show a little. When did you start telling people? Technically not out of 1st trimester until end of 12th week right? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:47 AM Flag
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If you have seen a heartbeat you are pretty safe to tell. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:51 AM Flag
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I always thought 2nd trimester started day one, week 14. With #1, we told people at 16 wks, with #2, at 14 wks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:52 AM Flag
[ - ] i have a 23 month old dd and am due with my 2nd. what kind of stroller should i buy. i have a bugaboo. can dd use wheely-board? is she too young? do i need a double stoller? help! 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Expecting 07.01.08, 11:46 AM Flag
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Too young for buggy board (and I hate the one for the Bugaboo anyway, can't push the stroller with it on unless you are really tall). I'd go for a Phil & Ted. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:47 AM Flag
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op. that is the front and back one where the baby is on the ground? i hate that one! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:48 AM Flag
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np. The people who hate it/write bad reviews have usually never tried one! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:49 AM Flag
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i just can't stomach a new baby being that low to the nyc streets and exhaust fumes. ugh! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:52 AM Flag
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I sold my bug for a P&T Sport and I've been happy. No way my toddler would stay on a buggy board. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:49 AM Flag
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^I also have a side by side but find the P&T much easier to use. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:50 AM Flag
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even in nyc? i think it is so gross the new baby is so low to the ground and cant see anything [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:52 AM Flag
[ - ] just so you know, I hate the new maxi look on 95% of the women I see wearing it 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:45 AM Flag
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If you are not tall and rail-thin but with boobs, you either look like a troll or a child in a nightgown. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:45 AM Flag
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exactly [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:56 AM Flag
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huh ? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:46 AM Flag
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What is the maxi look? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:47 AM Flag
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seriously... I'm thinking she's talking about wings or no wings ! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:48 AM Flag
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lol [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:55 AM Flag
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floor length but casual dresses, usually vibrant prints and very flowy [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:58 AM Flag
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thank you for the clarification. I obviously need to get a magazine and read up a bit ! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 12:01 PM Flag
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I don't think it would be so bad if there was some variety of style, length, etc. It looks like the new uniform. And if you're short you end up looking like a busty yoda. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 12:24 PM Flag
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i hope they go out of style FAST... with skinny jeans [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 12:28 PM Flag
[ - ] First baby on the way - I should expect that I will be showing by 19 weeks, right? Just wondering if I have to buy a maternity dress for a wedding. I'm 13 weeks right now and not really showing yet and still fit in most of my clothes. 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Expecting 07.01.08, 11:42 AM Flag
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I was showing at 19 weeks. Not huge, but showing. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:43 AM Flag
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could you wear a loose, non-maternity dress? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:43 AM Flag
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yes. you might just have a small belly. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:44 AM Flag
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it doesn't need to be officially "maternity" but roomy for sure. you'll almost definitely be showing. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:44 AM Flag
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anything with an empire waist will work just fine [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:45 AM Flag
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I hadn't gained more than 1-2 lbs by that point, but my clothes weren't fitting the way they used to. I wouldn't go maternity necessarily, but like above posters said - a roomier dress and/or empire waist would be good. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:53 AM Flag
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I will have the same thing. Thinking a regular dress that has some give should do just fine. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:55 AM Flag
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i would wait and see as long as you can. you might, you might not. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:57 AM Flag
[ - ] are twins births always be cesarean or some natural? 44 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Toddler 07.01.08, 11:41 AM Flag
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^by^ [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:41 AM Flag
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Had my twins vaginally in the OR. Was induced & Baby A came flying out -- dr. and nurse said it wasn't time, but they could barely get me in there. Baby B was sunny-side up so he came out 2 long hours later, all purple, but at 3.5 he is now a big, tough bruiser. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 02:16 PM Flag
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i know one person who had natural. everyone else had a c-section. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:41 AM Flag
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I had mine naturally, which was a big surprise to me and my doctor... we were all set and scheduled for a C, then they decided they wanted out! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:42 AM Flag
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did you have to do reconstructive surgery after that? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:43 AM Flag
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Reconstructive surgery for what? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:44 AM Flag
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maybe she thinks your vagina exploded. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:48 AM Flag
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that is correct to put in crude terms. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:49 AM Flag
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??!! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:51 AM Flag
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reconstructive surgery is sometimes performed if natural birth stretches the vagina so much so that it causes discomfort and makes sex unpleasurable. Clear enough? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:54 AM Flag
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you're nuts. Do you think that's common ? Regularly done ? Something most women do ? Enough Doctor 90210 for you. Take Dr. Ray off the speed dial. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:55 AM Flag
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why so agro and reading things into the original question? no where did it state that such a thing is regularly done? that was not the point. it was a question this particular woman who had given birth to twins and how it affected her body. calm down. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:58 AM Flag
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I'm preety calm, thanks for your concern, but the woman needing a bit of calm is the person responding to a simple "I had twins" vaginally" to "did you have reconstruction ?" That's a big wacky jump, wouldn't you say ? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 12:00 PM Flag
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why? that could have been the original point of op's query in the first place. c-section v. natural birth with twins and the effect it has on a woman's body. this is not a highly charged issue or a "wacky jump." I don't understand why you have such a problem with the topic. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 12:01 PM Flag
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don't tax yourself by thinking about it further then. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 12:03 PM Flag
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not sure why you assume this would happen after twin birth... not really any more than single or breech [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:56 AM Flag
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You realize that it's much more likely to have problems with stretching/tearing on a first delivery than a subsequent one? So that second twin is like nothing - whatever damage might have been done would already be done. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:58 AM Flag
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I see. I assumed it would be putting even more pressure on the area with a second one. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 12:00 PM Flag
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once the door is open, it's open for whoever's coming out ! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 12:03 PM Flag
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actually, that's not more likely, it's the common mismanagement of labor these days that's the problem. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:03 PM Flag
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Or that both twins came out at the same time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:50 AM Flag
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not for me [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:51 AM Flag
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No. I'm in the US btw. First children [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:48 AM Flag
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lawsuits !!!! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:42 AM Flag
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^^ the legal profession dictates OB care in this country ! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:43 AM Flag
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np. it certainly influences them imo. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:44 AM Flag
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so whoat does the legal profession leaning on these days? C-section or natural? what is considered more risky? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:44 AM Flag
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C-section is quicker and easier with less chance for complication. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:47 AM Flag
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less complications for the baby, you mean. maternal deaths from c-sections are vastly underreported (and apparently not much of a concern for anyone). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:03 PM Flag
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link, please? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.16.08, 04:53 PM Flag
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I know people who had natural twin births but in the UK not US. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:43 AM Flag
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bingo. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:47 AM Flag
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np: I know a bunch of people who have in the US. It really depends on the person - many people don't want to go through labor and pushing knowing there is a decent chance they will also then get a c-section. Others are okay with the idea and try anyway. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 12:08 PM Flag
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my friend had them naturally [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:58 AM Flag
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two friends had them vaginally, but delivery had to be in the OR, I guess in case emergency C was req'd. All went well. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 12:02 PM Flag
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By natural do you mean without drug or vaginally? I had mine vaginally . They were both head down, weeks before delivery and it worked for me. Generally it depends on the position of the first whether vag. birth is an option. I delivered in an OR with an epi that way if there was a problem they could do the c-section. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 12:06 PM Flag
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I know six twin moms, three had c-section and three vaginal delivery. One even sans drugs (second labor and quite fast). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:41 PM Flag
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i gave birth naturally at 37.5 weeks 8 months ago to twin girls weighing 9lbs 4ozs and 7lbs 8.5ozs, my 2nd and 3rd, so yes it can be done [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:01 PM Flag
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Holy Crap! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 06:26 PM Flag
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I delivered twins at NYU last year. The NYU faculty practice is pro vaginal delivery for twins. We tried our best, baby A was vaginal delivery, but baby B was C section delivery. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:12 PM Flag
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That sucks...to labor, push one out, then only to be sliced anyway. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 06:28 PM Flag
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my mom had my younger brothers (twins) not only naturally but at home. of course people can have twins naturally! what, did you think all mothers of twins previously died in childbirth!?!? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:37 PM Flag
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Having twins naturally is common. I had my first single birth c-section. He was breeched. I absolutely hated it. I got pregnant with twins a couple years later and had them VBAC(vaginal after c-section. it's really up to your doctor for this situation. For yours, there is no reason (healthy I assume)for your doctor to just schedule a c-section. It's more money, more painful,more traumatic , and less bonding for the new family. Just try ti have them naturally and let nature takes it;s course, if you can't you can't. No big deal. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.16.08, 04:50 PM Flag
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less bonding? please [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.16.08, 04:53 PM Flag
[ - ] Anyone under 35 opt for amnio? Why? 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Expecting 07.01.08, 11:39 AM Flag
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CVS sounds like a better bet all around, combined with the nuchal. Done much earlier. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:41 AM Flag
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even though it is riskier then amnio? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:43 AM Flag
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Yes, but it's done at 10 weeks. A lot easier to have to think about terminating at 10 weeks than after you've felt the baby move. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:54 AM Flag
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i've heard that with an experienced practitioner, the risk is not really higher [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 12:04 PM Flag
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I did, only because we had a bad 20-week ultrasound (for #1). For #2, I did CVS - getting an amnio at 21 weeks and no results until nearly 23 weeks was one of the most distressing times of my life. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:44 AM Flag
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yes, but actually i opted for cvs. the reason for that is i worked for years with disabled kids, and dh has a brother with autism. i know what that's like, and i was more scared of a disabled child than a miscarriage. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 12:03 PM Flag
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yes because the quad screen came back with an elevated risk for downs. The amnio was not as bad as I thought, but the 2 week wait was horrible. The dr I had does hundreds of amnios a year so the procedure was very quick and minimal pain. The risk for miscarriage is a lot lower if you have an experienced dr. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.08, 06:22 AM Flag
[ - ] do you travel with a bed (travel bed) for a 2 year old, when you go away? if not, what do you do? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:30 AM Flag
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put mattress on the floor [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:32 AM Flag
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sometimes bring pack and play or blow up bed [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:36 AM Flag
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todder Aerobed [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:36 AM Flag
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and you like it? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:51 AM Flag
[ - ] Any Hoboken moms on? 0 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:29 AM Flag
[ - ] how much did your invisalign cost? 0 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:28 AM Flag
[ - ] We are about to let our nanny go. No particular reason, we just feel in general our daughter needs to be challenged more as opposed to babysat all day. Should I tell her in advance or on a Friday tell her it's her last day? We plan to make up a reason why we're changing nannies. 37 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:27 AM Flag
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Tell her in advance, especially if you have a good excuse. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:29 AM Flag
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Have you ever been employed? How would you like to be treated? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:29 AM Flag
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exactly ! That makes me angry. You let her stay with your child and expect that she respect your family, yet you question how much respect - really - you should afford her ? Egocentric and unkind... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:31 AM Flag
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If she was so great, she wouldn't be fired. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:32 AM Flag
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np: In large corporations, people are always fired on Mondays and told to go home immediately. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:33 AM Flag
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Do the children of of those corporations get emotionally attached to their employees? And vice versa? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:39 AM Flag
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If you think it's a good idea to leave a small child with a disgruntled employee who already knows they are fired, you are mental. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:43 AM Flag
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You'd be surprised -- I think the kids get less emotionally attached than you'd imagine. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:43 AM Flag
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np: agreed, we had to fire a nanny who had been with us nearly a year. Things got ugly and I didn't let her say goodbye to him. He asked once, dropped it and had no problem moving on to our new nanny who has been with us 3 years. Completely forgot about the other one. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:50 PM Flag
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That's absurd. I work for one of the largest corporations in the country ($80B in revenue) and this is not done, unless it's firing for cause which is immediate whenever the cause is found. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:40 PM Flag
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Oh good lord, it's totally different and you know it. This is a person who takes care of OP's child. Also, at my company, you are told you are fired and escorted out b/c they know that employees who are fired tend to act out. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:31 AM Flag
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I would tell her as she leaves on friday and give her a few weeks severence and offer good references. I wouldn't want someone who had a beef with me watching my kid. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:31 AM Flag
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Thanks. That what my husband wants to do. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:34 AM Flag
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ita. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:37 AM Flag
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ita also [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:49 AM Flag
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Would you not consider discussing her job with her and letting her know how you feel, and where she needs to improve/ stretch herself? Like a formal job review. Particularly if your girl is comfortable with her. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:32 AM Flag
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I tried that a few months ago. And for the first few weeks after our talk things were great, but slowly they went back to they way things were. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:35 AM Flag
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Fair enough. Anyway, it sounds like your relationship with her has turned sour, so probably best for everyone to cut free. Might be tough on your daughter though. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:37 AM Flag
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if you want a teacher hire one - a nanny is not a tutor [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:33 AM Flag
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Totally disagree. Part of a nanny's job is to challenge a child and help them grow. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:38 AM Flag
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maybe you should be a better mother or put your child in day care or maybe preschool [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:49 AM Flag
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np: That's bullshit. Our part-time sitter does all sorts of games and activities that are fun and have some sort of educational/developmental benefit. The last was figuring out as many words as possible starting with a certain letter (for a 4yo) - they did it on craft paper to see how long the list would be. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:42 AM Flag
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I hope you pay her well [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:48 AM Flag
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We do. But I don't think people should watch children for a living unless they want to be around children. So many nannies don't. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:50 AM Flag
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yes we must make sure our children are developmentally challenged all day long [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:51 AM Flag
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I never said it was all day long. But she is creative and fun with the kids in ways I never would have been, I've learned a lot from her. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:55 AM Flag
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then you got lucky. you cannot expect to hire people at relatively low wages with no benefits and little recourse if you treat them badly and expect that type of interaction. that is more typical of people with a fair amount of education in child development - which is not true of most nannies. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 12:00 PM Flag
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It's not such a low wage for those that are off the books, and it's a great wage for the level of education and working conditions. We've never had someone full-time, so perhaps that is the difference - it's not so many hours and I'm around, so less chance to either get bored or be lazy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 12:13 PM Flag
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You have very low standards. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:44 AM Flag
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no I don't have a nanny. I do that myself [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:48 AM Flag
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So, do you have equally low standards for your mothering skills? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:52 AM Flag
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you bet your ass I do. I don't sit on the floor and play with my child 8 hours a day. She plays very nicely by herself [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:57 AM Flag
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Wow. Just wow. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:58 AM Flag
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yep - I also don't read parenting books either or go nuts about comparing my child with others. I don't judge others either - apparently you do [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:59 AM Flag
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np: I like you. I feel the same way about our nanny. She's very hands on with our 2 year old but hands off with our 5 year old. I used to worry she wasn't engaging him enough until DH pointed out that he's old enough to play and act independently. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:51 PM Flag
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I hope you are giving her severance pay. It would be so unethical to cut off her financial support with no notice. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:58 AM Flag
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How long has she been your nanny? If a long time and your child is attached to her (and vice versa), I would try to work something out in advance - unless she has been very unprofessional. Two things: Give your daughter some time to get used to the idea and you may want her to have the option to see her nanny again in the future for a playdate (eve if it never happens, the idea that this won't be the last time she sees her nanny will make it easier for her), it would also be nicer to your nanny. If you speak to nannies, you realize that a number of them get very attached to the children and leaving them can be pretty hard - here again, offer to see her again in the future. 2 of the best nannies I know said that the hardest time of their professional lives was when they were asked to leave with no notice (in one case, the Friday before the family went to Europe for a 3-month extended vacation). The abrupt separation from the children was very hard to them. Having said this, I would be a bit nervous about leaving my child alone with someone who has been asked to leave. Can you have a parent or a family member come and visit for a few days (or take a few days off) in order to make sure there is no major issue? Would also be a good distraction for your child. Also make sure you are fair in terms of severance, etc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 12:10 PM Flag
[ - ] is it too hot to go to the park? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:27 AM Flag
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Yes. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:28 AM Flag
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No. You are fine til it reaches 94°, and then pull the shades, crank up the a/c, turn on Dora, and stay cool. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:29 AM Flag
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ok, i guess i should go out [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:31 AM Flag
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humid [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:17 PM Flag
[ - ] Dh has been home for a week (starts new job monday) and he seems angry all the time, at either the kids, or at me. When I ask him about it he says I don't appreciate him enough and that he feels like I put the kids first all the time. But when he's so angry all the time it's really hard for me to want to be anywhere near him, and I feel like I have to defend the kids. Any advice? 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:25 AM Flag
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Probably cabin fever. Be patient. He'll probably feel better once he's back at work. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:28 AM Flag
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actually, it's been going on a long time. but now we've spent a lot more time with him than usual. I used to think it was the stress of his old job and now that he has a job he's excited about it would calm down. It hasn't. He often gets mad at the kids for being kids. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:35 AM Flag
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I put the kids first. What mother doesn [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:35 AM Flag
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doesn't put her kids first? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:36 AM Flag
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mine didn't. in fact, she taught all her dd's that you should always put dh first. not that I agree with her, just saying [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:42 AM Flag
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For me db has been #1 since birth. I can't imagine feeling otherwise. And I love my dh. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:44 AM Flag
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ditto - he needs to grow up. my dh gets like this and it SUCKS - also gets made at kids for being kids and then if i try to discuss it's a huge fight. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:38 AM Flag
[ - ] Mothers of sons: any of you have morning sickness? 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:25 AM Flag
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had it awful with DD, very slight in comparison with DS. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:26 AM Flag
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yes [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:26 AM Flag
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Nope, not at all. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:26 AM Flag
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I did. Not quite as bad as with DD but pretty bad [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:28 AM Flag
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Oh yes - with both - for almost 16 weeks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:28 AM Flag
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I had it with all 3 pregnancies. 2 boys and a girl. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:29 AM Flag
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virtually none, maybe a few moments of queasiness/lightheadedness but they were very brief [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:29 AM Flag
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None twice [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:38 AM Flag
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very little [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:02 PM Flag
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no. was nauseated on 2 or 3 days, but that was it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 01:12 PM Flag
[ - ] All day I have told myself that I will go to the gym today at around 3:00. I WILL do this. Now the clock is heading toward that time and I'm thinking of a million reasons why I should not go to the gym. I hate exercising. I honestly resent having to do it ! Anyone with me ? A full-on boycott of all exercise for the sake of exercise ? Help ! 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:24 AM Flag
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I love exercising, but no time. I am jealous. Do it for me. I find if I can get through the first 15 mins the endorphins kick in and then I get my exercise high. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:26 AM Flag
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I meanthis honestly, not snarky me right now. What do you love about it ? I bring the ipod, have a magazine (sometimes many) there are TV's overhead, and I am miserable. I have sweating. I hate the monotony. What do you do to "pass the time " ? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:28 AM Flag
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^^ meant I hate sweating... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:28 AM Flag
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np I love how it makes me feel. I love the results but I also love the time alone in my head. I'm rarely bored. Sounds like you need a differet work out routine if you hate it that much. Take a class, dance or bike or something. There are fun ways to do this [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:31 AM Flag
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The sweating is cathartic for me. I really feel energized after. I sleep better. It hellps controls stress [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:31 AM Flag
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I do feel good after, both because I can finally stop and because I feel I did something for "me". I must need to do something else. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:39 AM Flag
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tell yourself you only have to stay for 15 minutes and if you're still totally hating it, you give yourself permission to leave. i bet you'll stay. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:36 AM Flag
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I have to admit that there I times that io drive over there and sit in my car talking on the phone in the parking lot and thenj drive away. I'm sure they see me out there and think I'm a loon ! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:40 AM Flag
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i'm 40 wks pg and *wishing* i could go to the gym -- i was never a big exerciser before, just did it because i had to, but now i'm missing that feeling of really getting sweaty and feeling my heart pound. looking forward to getting back to it! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 11:48 AM Flag
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