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Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] where are you nanny mom? i am curious how things went with your dc and how you are doing. you're in my thoughts! 13 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Newborn 07.01.08, 04:31 PM Flag
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who? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:35 PM Flag
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Which mom are you referring to? The tylenol one? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:36 PM Flag
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no the one getting the divorce [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:47 PM Flag
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The one who was thinking of suing the nanny? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:07 PM Flag
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she wasnt thinking of suing the nanny - others were suggesting it [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:08 PM Flag
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The wife should be prepared...if she sues the nanny the nanny could easily counter sue, and for much more specefic damages, like sexual harassment or even bring a rape charge...she'll be owning the very house the husband screwed her in. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:30 PM Flag
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She's thinking of suing the 20 year old girl? OMG, this is the husband's fault not some immature woman who's employer came on to her. I know the wife is upset and hurt and betrayed, but suing the girl is really a bad idea. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:27 PM Flag
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the wife wasnt thinking of it, someone else suggested it - it was an entirely different post not related to op [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:40 PM Flag
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oh, ok, I saw that one where the nanny was sleeping with the husband and thought that was it, thanks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:43 PM Flag
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nope the woman that posted about the suing was someone else suggesting that that woman sue [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 06:01 PM Flag
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i've been wondering too, it has been a few days [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:51 PM Flag
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she's off spinning more tall tales [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:58 PM Flag
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arent you the compassionate one [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:58 PM Flag
[ - ] G*d D*mn It UB, please let my collapsed posts stay collapsed! I don't want to see them, which is why I collapsed them. Thank you. 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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Site Feedback 07.01.08, 04:27 PM Flag
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ITTTA - I also tried to post to their "feedback site" and was unable to. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 08:00 AM Flag
[ - ] 10wks pg and Db is due in mid May. Friend told me we can forget about private school, can anyone elaborate a to why? TIA 14 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Preschool/Kids 07.01.08, 04:25 PM Flag
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What private schools do have in Omaha? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:27 PM Flag
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that's silly, a May child will be on the younger side of the class, but won't be the youngest by any means, and there are so many things that go into the mix you shouldn't worry about it at all -- and certainly don't worry about it now! good luck with the new baby! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:28 PM Flag
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Thank you feel much better [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:12 PM Flag
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how can you be 10 wks pg on July 1 and not due until mid-May? Are you gestating an elephant? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:39 PM Flag
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np: lol I was thinking the same thing..I guess she's due mid March [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:43 PM Flag
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She's trying to stress you out needlessly. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:40 PM Flag
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Your friend has been hitting the crack pipe again. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:43 PM Flag
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Well, you are not 10 wks pregnant if you are due mid-May - in fact, you may not even be pregnant yet. I had a May baby and got knocked up near the end of August. That said, my dc got into private school with a May birthday. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:44 PM Flag
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Congrats on your pregnancy. Your chances at getting into a private school should be the last thing on your mind right now. Besides, I wouldn't worry about a May birthday. Signed, mom of two August DDs. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:03 PM Flag
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Sorry to hijak, but how did your DDs fare in the application process? If they've been through it I mean. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:12 PM Flag
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DD #1 got into a couple schools but also got some "too young" feedback (in particular from one TT where we had a connection). But we are happy with where she is going. DD #2 is just entering preschool. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 06:04 PM Flag
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Thank you for answering. Does that mean DD #1 is at an ongoing now as a young summer bday? Would you mind saying how it's been for her so far? We're contemplating this for our August bday DD and feeling conflicted [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 07:43 PM Flag
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DD #1 is starting in the fall. Honestly, we are a little nervous about how she'll adapt. Compared to other 4-5 year olds, DD seems somewhat emotionally immature (which the ongoings that gave too young feedback must have picked up on). But our preschool thought DD would be ready for kindergarten and supported our decision to apply to K this past year, so we went with that. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:55 AM Flag
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your math is fuzzy [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:56 AM Flag
[ - ] Is it possible to feel quickening at 12 weeks? It doesn't feel like gas, it feels like a fast pulsing feeling. 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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Expecting 07.01.08, 04:23 PM Flag
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sure. I felt #2 at 12 wks. I felt #3 at 10 wks (the flutters) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:35 PM Flag
[ - ] I'm really sad. DS got a very mixed result on ERBs, 99 on verbal, but totally bombed performance. I understand that the result reflects some fine motor skills delays and his reluctance to do things unless he can do them perfectly, and we are working on these issues with him. But I really think the result was not representative of his ability. The preschool headmaster was encouraging, but realistically it will probably mean that we are shut out of private schools. The public school will be fine, but it just makes me so sad and angry that this stupid test, which I just think is not that accurate in his situation, will keep him out of programs that he would thrive in. I keep telling myself that this is not a fair system, and there are lots of kids out there with far worse options than my ds has -- including all of the kids whose parents are too poor to consider private school and are stuck with really terrible publics, as opposed to my decent one -- but despite all that I just can't seem to get over my anger and sadness on this issue. It just sucks and it makes me cry. 30 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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NY Schools 07.01.08, 04:13 PM Flag
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You never know. You should still try and have dc take SB, which is often sent if there is a difference. I know that these tests really suck. GL. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:15 PM Flag
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thanks, ds did take SB and did quite well on that, so maybe they will consider it [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:19 PM Flag
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Yes, many schools will. Especially if the SB reflects the school report more than the ERB and you child has a good school visit. Just remember to apply broadly. GL. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:20 PM Flag
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Of course now you feel it is unfair but if ds scored 99x3 you would singing the praises of the tests accuracy [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:17 PM Flag
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np. Most people I know had dc who scored high, and I don't know anyone who deludes themselves about what the scores mean. We all know dc could just as easily had an off day and bombed. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:40 PM Flag
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You mean you know people who SAY dc scored high - realize people lie [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:05 PM Flag
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No one I'm talking about has lied; we've never even had conversations about our dc's specific scores. But given where the dc go to school it's obvious they scored well. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:10 PM Flag
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oh so naive [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:12 PM Flag
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I'm not. But keep telling yourself that if you need to. My original point was simply that everyone I know whose dc took the ERB, SB or OLSAT was stressed because they ALL realized it would take nothing more than an off day for dc to tank the test, no matter how bright the kid might be. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:17 PM Flag
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Actually the scores are about 1/4 of the process, so anyone who stresses the score does not understand how the process works [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:20 PM Flag
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Whatever. You're oddly determined to be in the right about a group of people you don't even know, so go ahead and think whatever you want. But I know perfectly well these dc didn't get into multiple TT schools, Hunter and citywide G&Ts without high scores. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:29 PM Flag
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That's crazy talk from psd. There are schools that don't require ERB, so you can apply there. BTW, what did dc get on performance and what's the total score?? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:27 PM Flag
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37, 85, and what schools don't consider ERBs? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:29 PM Flag
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37 on performance? There's clearly something off that happened. I mean, that should be obvious to all the schools something happened... Anyway, Bankstreet doesn't and other schools uptown and downtown who don't ask for ERB. You can always transfer into MS later. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:33 PM Flag
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np: First of all you might still be in the running at some schools with an 85, especially if SB in in the mid-90s, PSD will go to bat for you and everything else looks good. Schools that I know of that don't ask for ERBs are MCS, Bank Street, Steiner. I am sure that there are more, but these were the first to come to mind. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:33 PM Flag
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Yes, submit SB score. PSD and you need to patch up 37 - did dc have an ear infection that day or was sick? Medication dc took in the morning wore off? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:38 PM Flag
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nothing like that, but has been dealing with some tough things at home (dh moved out a few mos ago, I thought he was ok but I think he's still having a hard time), PSD said she thought she could talk to the schools about this [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:40 PM Flag
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thanks, I appreciate the suggestions & encouragement [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:39 PM Flag
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Downtown, Village Community School doesn't require the ERB. Not sure about Little Red (it didn't require the ERB before, but may now). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:33 PM Flag
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VCS does require ERBs as of this past year (new admissions director, I believe). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 04:07 AM Flag
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BIS does not require ERBs either. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.08, 10:42 AM Flag
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City & Country doesn't [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:34 PM Flag
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Sadly, friend's DC had 50 point gap with 81 overall and was not admitted to any school which required ERBs. She had not taken the SB though as ERB scores came in too late and she was not looking at Hunter. Not to be Debbie Downer, but you should be realistic in expectations. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.08, 10:44 AM Flag
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this happened to my dc and the school suggested she take it again b/they felt she had an off day. Went from 20+ point gap to absolutely no gap and scored mid-90s overall. Sadly, I believe if she had gotten this score at the get go, she would have had more options. Most schools would not look at her w/first score (second score came in literally a week or two before letters were mailed). She got into a good school, but not one of our top 3. Understand how you feel-totally sucks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:27 PM Flag
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But if your dc took erb before, how can he take it again so soon? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:31 PM Flag
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if your psd goes to bat for you, you can get a retake. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:56 PM Flag
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Downtown schools that don't require ERBs include Little Red, City and Country and Corlears. That's a terrific verbal score, by the way. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:27 PM Flag
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thank you, it's so odd that there was more than a 60 point gap, I know schools see that as a big red flag [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:43 PM Flag
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Is your child younger? I think younger boys may often have a spread. You might even look at boys schools for this reason. I know families very happy with Browning. Good luck. I hope it works out for your child. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 06:11 PM Flag
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What skills does the "performance" section of the ERB measure? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.08, 10:51 AM Flag
[ - ] waht punishments/consequences do you use for a 3.5 y.o.? aside from time out. 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:05 PM Flag
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Loss of favorite toys for a bit, or loss of his 1-hour of TV a day. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:07 PM Flag
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she doesnt watch tv, and has a zillion toy. its really difficult. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:10 PM Flag
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np: Put some of the toys away. Loss of a toy is huge for my dd. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:49 PM Flag
[ - ] help me be a better neighbor because i am ready to go nuts on the new people who moved in next door. they don't have kids, put in a pool, is filled half way, they went out of town while it is being done. stopped by today and told me the town has not given permit for fence yet, so it will be like this for another 2 weeks 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:02 PM Flag
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that's fcked up. tell them to drain and cover it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:03 PM Flag
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there is a plastic mesh thing wrapped around poles, but kids could easily slip under, especially because in places there are ditches where the gasline is being dug [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:05 PM Flag
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call the town - we put in a pool and in no way is that allowed. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:28 PM Flag
[ - ] anyone on that has read Eat Pray Love? Started it, but cannot get into it and find it vaguely irritating. Will it get better or should I give it up? 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:02 PM Flag
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I enjoyed it start to finish. Probably if you're annoyed now, you will be throughout. Different strokes and all that. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:05 PM Flag
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I was annoyed with her smart alecky style at first, but ended up liking it. Don't give up yet [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:20 PM Flag
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i couldn't put it down from the beginning... but apparently a lot of people find her irritating. So maybe you won't get into it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 06:41 PM Flag
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everyone in my bookclub liked two of the three sections, but not the same ones. I would stick it out because I loved Italy and India (didn't care for the Love part so much) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 06:44 PM Flag
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Couldn't get passed Italy. Just didn't do it for me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 06:59 PM Flag
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trust your instincts. it blows. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 07:01 PM Flag
[ - ] Am disgusted with Friends Seminary. What has happened ti it? It used to be such a low key, crunchy school back when I was young. It seems to have morphed into an UES school with a downtowner address. Guess we can cross it off our list of school to apply to. 18 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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NY Schools 07.01.08, 03:58 PM Flag
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but they've got the NAKED BROTHERS BAND! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:00 PM Flag
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Gag. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:52 PM Flag
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^ Not gagging at the boys, who are probably nice kids. But I'm not a fan of the show. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:53 PM Flag
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they seem like typical spoiled private school nyc kids. the longish hair do and all. blech! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:34 PM Flag
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You're judging them by their HAIR? Good grief. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:35 PM Flag
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no, their attitude. but the hair is de rigeur! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:38 PM Flag
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What's with their attitude? Are they little creeps? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 06:49 PM Flag
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^ OK, I posted that and instantly felt guilty for trying to talk trash about some kids. Ignore me! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 06:50 PM Flag
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most downtown schools have changed, represening the changing demographics of Manhattan. but btdt, it isn't as bad as you say...sounds like someone has either sour grapes or is discouraging other applicants [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:06 PM Flag
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We're a little surprised too, although shouldn't be . . . . bottom line is that a school almost by definition cant be laid-back if its $30k/year. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:12 PM Flag
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^^starting there in the fall, but already realizing its more showy than what we thought we signed up for. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:14 PM Flag
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Why are you disgusted? Have you actually gone to check it out? Also, many of those UES schools are low-key - you shouldn't go by stereotypes and what you read on UB. Good luck with the process. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:13 PM Flag
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Wow why am I insane? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:19 PM Flag
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yes, I heard their idea of financial aid is loans that you have to pay back?? I was shocked when I heard this. Wasn't true when I was young and had friends at Friends. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:36 PM Flag
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Not true. They give tuition grants just like other schools. Their endowment isn't as huge as what you'll find at "tt" schools, but they do give real FA. And ALL schools, even the "tt" schools, offer families loans if they still need help after FA or don'tt qualify for any aid. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 06:54 PM Flag
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np--I've never heard of loans at my dc's school (and we receive aid). Friends tuition doesn't include lunch. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 04:12 AM Flag
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What school? Maybe you should ask about it. If the school is one that offers families a monthly payment plan through KeyBank or another agency, the loans are usually offered through that bank. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:29 AM Flag
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ITA. I was turned off by the whole process last year. Just seemed like they didn't handle things well (especially the whole "meaningful waitlist" thing). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:41 PM Flag
[ - ] Pet peeve: I am a spiritual person but I hate it when people say they are praying for something that is not going to be influenced by prayer. I was recently told that a woman prayed that my next child will be a boy. Her prayers have no influence on the sex of my child. That was determined at conception. (plus - I don't even want a boy necessarily.) 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 03:38 PM Flag
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I think it's a nice gesture when ppl say they will keep you in your prayers. I find it ungrateful that something like that would bother you. It's harmless and meant well. I don't have an issue with it. Many times all ppl can do to help is say a prayer [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 03:40 PM Flag
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OP: I think it's presumptious to think she knows what is best. If she'd said she was praying for a happy and healthy pregnancy I'd be ok with it. I actually took a class taught by a priest who said that it's nice to ASK if you can pray for someone but arrogant to assume they want or need your prayers. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 03:42 PM Flag
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or: yes I agree that when it's specified she's praying for a specific gender when you are ttc. I think that's wacky. I just think the statements that ppl make about keeping you in their prayers are nice [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 03:48 PM Flag
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^^btw I grew up catholic in catholic schools and I would feel weird asking someone "can I pray for you?" lol..I only tell ppl about saying a prayer for them if I know them..not total strangers [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 03:49 PM Flag
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my mother prays to win the lottery instead of franticly saving during the final years before retirement, uggg [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 03:41 PM Flag
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op: lol - i wish to win the lottery all the time. i don't actually play it, though so it's a futile dream. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 03:42 PM Flag
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she plays it, fortunately just one number every week, so she's not spending too much on it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 03:45 PM Flag
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yuck, who would tell someone that they are praying you have a boy? are we in the 18th century? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 03:42 PM Flag
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A relative said the same thing to me when I was pregnant with my second. I was like, "Why are we praying for a boy, exactly?" It felt very ew. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 03:57 PM Flag
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I was honored when people told me that they would pray for me to have a baby. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 03:59 PM Flag
[ - ] Need to buy clothes for my newborn - what do I need? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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Expecting 07.01.08, 03:35 PM Flag
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kimono tshirts, onsies, pj's (gown), sweater for fall [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 03:41 PM Flag
[ - ] Seeing the other post I just have to ask, WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE, paying their nannies $25-$33/hr and telling everyone else that they are taking advantage of their nannies at $15/hour. Hello, but educated professional in this city are making less than that on an hourly basis! 55 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 03:30 PM Flag
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those are prob nannies writing those posts/replies. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 03:30 PM Flag
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My nanny IS an educated professional. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 03:32 PM Flag
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i live in greenwich, ct. and fwiw, we pay $20-25/hr for nannies who cook, clean, iron, do errands, shuttle the kids around, babysit, everything. i don't know anyone who pays more than $25/hr, although I do know families who have their household help on a formal payroll. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 03:33 PM Flag
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but that is CT [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:13 PM Flag
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well you don't have a nanny, you have a housekeeper. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:30 PM Flag
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I certainly hope their help is on "formal payroll" As opposed to off the books? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:31 PM Flag
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they are liars = trying to make other people feel bad - just like the HHI posts - half of them or more are lies [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 03:34 PM Flag
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ITA [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:37 PM Flag
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me too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 08.24.08, 04:24 PM Flag
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Based on her gross pay (including taxes), we pay $25 per hour, but our nanny nets closer to $18 per hour. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 03:35 PM Flag
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i think it is crazy, my dh is a IT analyist and works harder than any nanny and he makes $25 an hour, granted he is just starting out but come on people, they are glorified babysitter. Additionally, just because you pay them more doesn't make up for the fact that you are not there for your child. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 03:42 PM Flag
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Why do you think your DH works harder than a nanny? I am a CFO. And I think I have a much easier job than a nanny. I would gouge my own eyes out to avoid reading Green Eggs and Ham one more time if I were a nanny. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:43 PM Flag
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NP: Just because you'd rather do your job than do childcare, does not make your job easier per se - just better suited for you. DH (not in IT) works 60+ hours/week, under stressful conditions, needs to check in on weekends, is responsible for a bottom line, has to deal with office politics, doesn't have time for lunch etc. It's definitely NOT easier than childcare. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:46 PM Flag
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Your DH's job doesn't sound any different than mine. And it is MUCH easier than running playgroups or entertaining cranky toddlers all day. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:57 PM Flag
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Again, while YOU may find it easier, I don't think that makes it a universal truth. DH would quit his job and stay home in a heartbeat. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:53 PM Flag
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what a bs. you just dont want to spend time with your dc, it's different. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.14.08, 05:12 PM Flag
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yeah, it does actually sound A LOT harder that a nanny's job. especially if the nanny is taking care of one kid. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.14.08, 05:14 PM Flag
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I pay $14 an hour, on the books. When you factor in everything the legalities add, it appears that I am paying way over market. But I'm really not. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:11 PM Flag
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Our babysitter (nee: nanny) has been with us for 12 years. We now pay her almost $45 an hour but she has 3 dcs and does light cleaning. She also has health insurance with my Dhs company. It all depends on what you have to spend and what you are willing to spend. IMO though, so many people in NYC insist on having help and discuss that they can afford help but treat them poorly considering they are caring for our most important asset [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:16 PM Flag
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omg you are insane [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:18 PM Flag
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really why [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:22 PM Flag
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Liar [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:07 PM Flag
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she is a liar for calling her insane...this just gets better and better [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:09 PM Flag
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haha. wow, you're nuts. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.14.08, 05:15 PM Flag
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ita - i pay $35 an hour plus two yearly bonuses - she helps care for my four children, does cleaning, sometimes does cooking and grocery shopping, she is a second mother in my house [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:30 PM Flag
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OP: that's fine - after 12 years, you are paying for a unique and special relationship. but honestly, that is NOT the norm, or average, or typcial or even a situation that most people find themselves in. It's great that this works for your family, but it's probably not going to work for very many families. It's simply NOT the going rate for household help. Salaries are what the market can bear. If all household help demanded $25+/hour, then far fewer people would be able to hire help, more people would be out of work and they would accept a lower wage. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:36 PM Flag
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But we are not talking about household help we are talking about someone who raises your dcs [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:04 PM Flag
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I raise my own dc thank you very much. His nanny's responsibility is picking him up from school, taking him on playdates/to the park/etc., preparing his meals and bathing him. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:55 PM Flag
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not just that, who has an extra 75k or 100k to pay a nanny, regardless of how special the situation is. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 08.24.08, 04:08 PM Flag
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Thank you, yes. These women b$tch because they have to pay someone to care for their dcs. Some of them, not myself, SAH and yet they curse how lacking nannies are and then complain that they are not worth more than minimum wage horrible! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:07 PM Flag
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that is crazy. nobody with 4 kids and means to pay that much would keep just one nanny at 35/hr instead of several at 10/hr. that is a lie. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.14.08, 05:10 PM Flag
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"nee:nanny" lol She was born "Nanny"? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:33 PM Flag
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How did you get her covered through DH's company? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:41 PM Flag
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they probably put nanny of their payroll as an employee - after it's their company [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:56 PM Flag
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Yes, but the risk pooling for group plans doesn't allow you to just add anyone without them having bona fide employment with the company sponsoring the group. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:58 PM Flag
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Dh owns the company [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:05 PM Flag
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That doesn't answer my question. Does he have two groups? One for his company's employees and one for his domestic employees? Or is he claiming that she works for the company? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:06 PM Flag
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Claims she works for the company, she is not a write off but she is covered by health insurance as a personal assistant which she is [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:08 PM Flag
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But if the health insurance provider gets hip to the scheme, everyone in the group could lose their coverage retroactively for the benefit year. That is a HUGE risk to take. And DH could end up personally liable for all of his employees medical bills for the entire year. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:55 PM Flag
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That's crazy. Almost $100K a year? Some doctors don't make that. Or lawyers. Professors don't make that. Writers rarely make that. Social workers never make that. Teachers--with Masters--make that after about 20 years on the job. Nurses don't usually make that. The list goes on. People like you make it impossible for the rest of us to actually survive. You're like the people who totally overbid for a home--just because you want it and your so flush. Next thing you know, the rest of us are paying 80% of their take home just to live in a shack. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 12:16 AM Flag
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That's 90K per year. I don't find that anyone I've met when interviewing sitters is even close to worth that. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 08.31.08, 10:36 AM Flag
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I pay $17/hr for 2 kids--no cooking or cleaning. Seems okay to me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 04:19 PM Flag
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me too, plus health insurance and month's bonus at end of the year. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 08.31.08, 10:48 AM Flag
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I should really move to NYC and become a babysit. My last job only paid $23/hr and didn't involve snacking on pudding pops and reading books all day. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 10:33 PM Flag
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I really can't believe how much judgement and hostility there is on this board directed towards both parents and babysitters. We all make our own choices. Just because one person pays a sitter $25/hr does not mean that you have to. There are sitters that can/will work for less and there are those that will only work for more. Parents find babysitters that match their needs and vice-versa. I am a babysitter and work very hard. I am an artist who supports herself as a babysitter. I have a degree from a top college, am in my late twenties, have worked in corporate jobs and could be a lawyer or doctor if I wanted to. To paint all babysitters as lazy is totally inappropriate and offensive. Good babysitters work very very hard and are deserving of solid compensation. They are also deserving of breaks. Yes, I have babysat for sleeping children and have passed the time reading a book. I have also had children wake up in a nightmare or with a terribly painful ear infection or frightened in a thunderstorm and I have been there. I have had children ask me questions about miscarriages, death, marriage etc and have had to navigate answering those questions in ways that I felt their parents would appreciate. Babysitting is not just about making sure that your child doesn't die. It is much more complicated and is a job with HUGE responsibility. I am so grateful to have never had to deal with the attitude I am discovering today. I know some of the comments have been casual and have been said in jest but I feel like they are totally disrespectful nonetheless. Why is it SO shocking that a babysitting can make a living? a good living even? I had no idea that this was such a hot button topic. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 08.24.08, 03:43 PM Flag
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The problem is for those of us who have to work and cannot afford those rate. I've been shocked by high school students expecting 15 an hour to sit on a sofa while my child sleeps. Hard part about living in the city is that there are so many who are so wealthy that price is no object for them. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 08.24.08, 04:04 PM Flag
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^^^ I also don't recommend my sitters to my wealthier friends because I'll lose them. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 08.24.08, 04:10 PM Flag
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that's not quite true. every time someone pays their nanny $17/hour or $25/hour, it raises the bar for the rest of us. so yes, when someone does it it does sometimes mean we have to too. it's like the poster above said about housing prices...the people who can overpay and do so raise prices for the rest of us. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 08.24.08, 04:15 PM Flag
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This is the babysitter again. I know that paying $25/hr can raise the bar for everyone else however I maintain that you can still find qualified, loving babysitters for an amount that you can afford because there are many many babysitters out there in ny. I for one am constantly taking pay cuts in order not to price out families that are struggling financially. I can only afford to do that because I am able to offset the loss by working for families that pay me more. I'm not trying to oversimplify the difficulty of finding an affordable babysitter. As an artist I often wonder how I would be able to afford a babysitter like myself in the future. I am just saying that 1. I would appreciate not having babysitting looked at as such a simple, nothing job (ie. not SUCH a contrast from "educated professional" and "lawyer", or "teacher" etc...)and 2. that parents realize that there are actually also positive things for everyone about families paying higher babysitting rates when they are able. It is not such a black and white issue. I wouldn't be able to afford to be a babysitter at a regular rate of $15. I'd have to stop alltogether. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 08.31.08, 08:25 AM Flag
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Maybe the people who "overpay" their nannies feel the nanny DESERVES it and really wants to keep their nanny happy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.01.08, 11:17 PM Flag
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What about you and your degree makes you worth 50K per year as a sitter? Not flaming, but truly curious to know what you bring to the job that distinguishes you from sitters making $15 an hour. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 08.31.08, 10:45 AM Flag
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I'm not sure how to respond to this because I never said I deserved to be payed more than other babysitters. I was only commenting on my experience as someone whose normal rate is higher than $15/hr. I also never said I made 50k. I only mentioned my degree because I feel like it is inaccurate (and disrespectful) to paint babysitters as less than "educated professionals." I don't really know how exactly to explain what makes me deserving of my rate. It is not such a science. As a babysitter I'm trustworthy, creative, silly, kind, non-judgemental, patient, honest, smart, super responsible.... I guess these are qualities that appeal to the families I work for. I feel totally comfortable as a babysitter and parents feel like they can relax when I'm with their children because they know that I will handle anything that comes up in a manner that they themselves would support. I've had a couple of mothers tell me how thankful they were to have found me because they had never previously been able to truly relax and enjoy themselves when their kids were being watched by previous sitters. With me they didn't feel they had reason to worry because they knew that their kids were being well cared for. Again, I am not saying that these are skills that I possess exclusively. This is just the only way I know how to respond to your question. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.01.08, 10:46 PM Flag
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don't forget watching TV while the kids nap. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.14.08, 05:17 PM Flag
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i've been flamed here for paying low nanny salary (don't ask) and i think there are posters here who just really don't understand finances of middle and low income families. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 08.24.08, 04:04 PM Flag
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Can anyone recommend a great housekeeper in Greenwich, CT? She needs to live-in, drive, swim, and do a small amount of childcare. She must have excellent long-term references and an old fashioned work ethic. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.14.08, 05:04 PM Flag
[ - ] My 2.5yo still gets diaper rashes. Is that normal? For some reason they get worse in a pullup vs. a diaper. 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 03:25 PM Flag
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must have sensitive skin, pull ups absorb less water, so that is probably what is causing it [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 03:48 PM Flag
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One of my dds was like that. I simply made it a habit to rub a mix of lotrimin, neosporin and desitin on her all the time. Even when PTing. It's easier to prevent them than to get rid of them if you end up with a really bad one. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 03:50 PM Flag
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