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Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] This is just my experience but in my elem school, the kids who were in the top of the class/grade were kids whose sahm's worked with them all the time. But in MS, these kids fell to the middle of the pack and the ones who became top of the class weren't kids (except one or two) who were the best students in Elem school. I wonder if this will be true nowadays and in NY... 41 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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NY Schools 07.27.08, 04:55 AM Flag
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of course its true. Except for the children who have "tutors" writing their papers and parents doing the projects. If the teachers are too clueless to realize... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 04:57 AM Flag
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But even if their homework gets better grades, if they do poorly on tests, it will be telling, no? Can tutors turn slow kids into smart kids? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 05:09 AM Flag
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Trust me--teachers always know when the parents are doing the work. Personally, I have switched to giving a lot of in-class essays instead of take-home b/c of these "helicopter" parents. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 08:07 AM Flag
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I think the best term is hot house parents. Those parents who manipulate the environment to ensure the fastest yield. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 11:15 AM Flag
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I'm glad you realize what's going on, there are a number of teachers who do not. I think its easy to fall into the trap of having it LOOK like you are an excellent teacher because your students are doing such advanced work - when you really know the truth but do nothing about it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 11:51 AM Flag
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Why would it be any different depending on geographic location? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 05:17 AM Flag
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What is the point of this post.. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 05:18 AM Flag
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What is the post of any other UB post? This is where we think out aloud and just see what others think. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 05:21 AM Flag
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Ok then what is your line of thinking here. Not flaming trying to figure out what this means or what difference it makes who ends up where and why [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 05:27 AM Flag
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Wondering how meaningful is the early childhood enrichment and parental intervention in the early years (not the general kind but the helicopter-mom'ish involvement).. I have not enrolled dc in various classes, haven't done any flashcard/workbooks, etc. Because I thought it won't make a difference. Just had dc play whatever she likes. Figured smart and motivated kids will rise eventually on their own w/ or w/o helicopter moms... but then, maybe I'm naive and my experience is not relevant in hypercompetitive NYC...? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 05:39 AM Flag
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>below poster who works with her 4yo with math workbooks (even if dd likes them, sounded weird to me.. to do workbooks at 4yo). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 05:41 AM Flag
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np: that's my philosophy too (and not in NYC, but we do have some of those pressures where we are). Almost all the kids in DS's class have SAHMs--and what I noticed is that the ones already reading and excelling were mostly the older girls. I don't think you can make them read or do academics sooner than they're ready too. I would do workbooks or that sort of thing if my kid wanted to--but mostly I read a lot of books to him (DD too, but she's 2.5) and then give him opportunities to learn about the things that interest him. We'll see how it plays out. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 06:18 AM Flag
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I heard some people enroll their kids in a math class for their 2yo's. I thought that was crazy but then, maybe in NYC, that's what people do... I think I'm definitely in the minority here bec I don't want dc to grow up too fast. Dc will have to study so hard in HS or college (or in MS, yikes) - I want dc to play in LS and under... but I don't know... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 06:26 AM Flag
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nnp - I have NEVER heard of math classes for 2 year olds. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 06:39 AM Flag
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^^^In NYC, that is. I can't speak for other places. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 06:40 AM Flag
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Sadly, I have. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 06:41 AM Flag
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Where are the classes? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 06:43 AM Flag
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Don't know but friend told me some people organized a class. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 06:47 AM Flag
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What area of town? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 06:48 AM Flag
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Manhattan. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 06:49 AM Flag
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>I think UWS. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 06:49 AM Flag
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Can you ask your friend about it? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 06:51 AM Flag
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About what? Or are you interested in enrolling your 2yo? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 06:54 AM Flag
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No, my kids are older already. I'm curious about it - what they would do with 2 yr olds, etc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 06:56 AM Flag
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Oh, right. I will ask but what can they do except count to 10 and try to ask if they have one or two apples in their hands? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 06:59 AM Flag
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ITA. This is such a dumb post. I know many children - my family included who did not have any help etc. but are very bright and excelled all the way. Sounds like someone is feeling guilty about being a working my here. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 08:10 AM Flag
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That was not my experience here [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 05:21 AM Flag
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On 5th grade parent visiting day at my dc's school, the math teacher gave the kids and their parents a tough brain teaser problem, with the answer due the next day. I wondered at the time if it was a way for him to find out which parents could help their kids and which could not. By 5th grade, my observation is that some parents (especially moms) can no longer help with math and science homework. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 06:20 AM Flag
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You mean, parents can't do 5th grade math? Can't believe that is true. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 06:23 AM Flag
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What I see is that dads are more likely to help with math --topics include area of trapezoids and polygons, order of operations, graphing in the coordinate plane (this last one was 6th grade). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 06:31 AM Flag
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I took engineering math in college (calculus in HS). I figured I should be able to help all the way through 12th grade. But I did forget everthing. Maybe I couldn't help dc, either... This is very sad. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 06:34 AM Flag
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Luckily my child has good textbooks (Prentice Hall). I just read the chapter first. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 07:54 AM Flag
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No, I have never noticed that in NYC, at least among kids in the G&T system. The kids in the older elementary grades who were the top students did not necessarily have SAHMs. And generally, they're the ones who went to the selective MS and then to selective HSs. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 06:43 AM Flag
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Well, where I grew up, we didn't have G&T program. Just very good gen eds. So everyone got the same education but maybe that's why. Or maybe bec MS got very science and math heavy. Kids who got tutored by mom in LS in reading or history couldn't do higher level math, physics in MS. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 06:46 AM Flag
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But of course, there are also excellent students in English and social studies and art and music - I don't consider top students just the ones who do well in calc and physics. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 06:50 AM Flag
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Grades got weighted more by math and science. As it turned out in my school anyway, those who were good in math and science were also good in other subjects but those who were good in social science/language weren't necessarily good in math and science. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 06:56 AM Flag
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I did really well in elementary school, but my SAHM was hanging out and dancing around to her Neil Diamond records all day, rather than "working with me". She was happy, I was happy, did well in school, no helicoptering . . . .it worked. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 07:57 AM Flag
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Oh my God, that's my mom. She's a Big Neil freak. She was doing that or watching Jack Lalane and exercising along. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 08:43 AM Flag
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I should have added that - the whole Jane Fonda program, with the leg warmers too (that came a little later i suppose). She was very busy with that while I was toiling on my homework . . . . [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 08:53 AM Flag
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You're bringing back some memories here for me too. It's making me think about how much my parents did or didn't do with me. A lot of times, there would be an activity I was interested in doing and they didn't just jump to it to make it easy for me. I'd have to work out carpool on my own. Or earn the money to enter my pet in a contest, or buy a costume for whatever thing. Something to think about for sure. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 08:58 AM Flag
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I'm not in NYC but I do see that some kids fall back. The same is true in sports. Not all kids do though. It just depends on the natural talent and level of interest of the kid. Lots of kids slip in middle school because of adolescent insanity as well. It would be interesting to track them into high school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 11:20 AM Flag
[ - ] anyone on? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 01:57 AM Flag
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Me -- woke up super early (probably b/c I slept all day yesterday!) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 03:08 AM Flag
[ - ] anyone have endometriosis surgery as part of ttc? scheduled for it, and a little nervous - I know it's no big deal, but would love to hear from someone who has btdt. tia! 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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TTC 07.26.08, 10:33 PM Flag
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I was just diagnosed today and they won't take me in for a consulation appointment until end of september which i believe is crazy. Don't know if I should try to find another Dr or just wait. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.29.08, 02:35 PM Flag
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yes, just had it. its okay. you get anesthesia and will be a little sore for a week afterwards. dont worry! good luck to you [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.28.10, 05:36 PM Flag
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Yes, had it a 1 1/2 years ago and still not pregnant. The endo turned out to be the least of my problems. The surgery itself is a breeze. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.28.10, 06:31 PM Flag
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^^and I've done research since then, and it turns out that removing the endo from the ovaries can be counterproductive--it can remove ovarian tissue and make ovarian reserve issues worse. I have terrible ovarian reserve, will be using donor eggs at age 35 in fact, and can't help but wonder if the fact that my first RE removed endometriomas from both ovaries contributed to my diminished reserve. Just something to keep in mind. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.28.10, 06:34 PM Flag
[ - ] HELP! I don't know what happened but one of my nipples has a small gouge in it. I noticed it when I tried to nurse my almost 7mo daughter. IT HURT. Now what? I don't want my milk to dry up, but nursing or pumping on that side is too painful. For tonight, I hand expressed (less pulling, pulling, pulling on the sore spot) and then bandaged the gouge with a little neosporin. Anyone BTDT? Or have any suggestions? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 09:56 PM Flag
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Get some Lansinoh, it will make it feel better and you can still nurse as it is safe for baby [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 11:35 PM Flag
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Call a lactation consultant or read Kathleen Huggin's excellent book "nursing mothers' companion". Do you have a la leche group nearby? Getting advice from anonymous message boards is not ideal. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 09:13 AM Flag
[ - ] Anyone live on LI? What are good children's boutiques? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 09:52 PM Flag
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yup, denny's, lester's [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 01:58 AM Flag
[ - ] Does anyone know chinese? what does this symbol mean? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 09:48 PM Flag
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http://lemontshirts.com/Lemon%20F08a/china.gif [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 09:48 PM Flag
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That is one ugly tee shirt [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 07:21 AM Flag
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i think its nice [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 07:32 AM Flag
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the symbol means peace. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 05:45 PM Flag
[ - ] phoebe or zoe for dd? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 09:27 PM Flag
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I know sisters named Phoebe and Zoe. Both are cute names IMO. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 03:08 AM Flag
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Both awfully common in NYC but fine. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 09:11 AM Flag
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prefer phoebe [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 09:18 AM Flag
[ - ] 3mo used to poop 2-3 times a day (yellow poop) then this week he has only pooped once. (And it was green and slimy). Until Monday he was EBF, except for 1 bottle of Alimentum at night. End of last week, I upped that to twice a day, is it the Alimentum? SHould I be worried? Shouldn 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 09:05 PM Flag
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op: shouldn't he poop more frequently? also, this past week, his gas is super smelly. so strange [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 09:06 PM Flag
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Why are you using Alimentum? Is he allergic to dairy? If so and you're still BF, are you avoiding dairy too? My dd started with green slimy poops around then and it turned out to be because of her dairy allergy. Also apparently too much foremilk/not enough hindmilk makes for green slimy poops. Also, formula is indeed more constipating than breast milk. And finally, maybe he has a stomach bug? Probably it's nothing and will pass. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 06:19 AM Flag
[ - ] I loved George Carlin. 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:46 PM Flag
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me too [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 09:06 PM Flag
[ - ] need to sell bugaboo as we just found out we're having another dc. since classifieds are gone on here, craigslist it? never had much success with that... 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Newborn 07.26.08, 08:37 PM Flag
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Yes. Craigslist is great for strollers. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 03:51 AM Flag
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why did they take away the classifieds? So crazy! Craigslist is not directed right at moms [ Reply | More
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General Topics 12.07.08, 10:53 AM Flag
[ - ] Anyone make less than 200k a year? 20 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:32 PM Flag
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yeah. sahm makes $0. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:33 PM Flag
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combined [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:33 PM Flag
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yup. i make $0 and my dh makes a huge 55K (resident salary). gotta love it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:34 PM Flag
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How many dcs? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:34 PM Flag
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1 dd and one on the way in 2 weeks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:35 PM Flag
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ny area? If so, how do you do it? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:36 PM Flag
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nyc. prior to having kids, banked as much as possible. we don't eat out, cut coupons, second hand everything for kids. probably two more years of living like this until fellowship is done. then we get to pay down $250K in student loans for DH. this is why you should never marry a doctor! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:40 PM Flag
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yeah, but think of 5 years, 10 years from now. What kind of doctor. We did nyc in mid 90s with tow kids on 35k a year (500 sq ft. apartment). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:43 PM Flag
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Sorry my violins are not playing for you. Thee is plenty of money at the end of your rainbow - Drs. do just fine [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 07:11 AM Flag
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I'm married to one too, and they don't do as well as people think. I mean, it's fine in the end, but it's not a way to make money [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 04:11 PM Flag
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not these days. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.28.08, 07:33 PM Flag
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111K a year. maybe not on UB, but in NYC there are tons of people who make less than 200K. It's not the same as in other parts of the country, but anything over 100K is not exactly broke. Maybe not living the high life, but you're not starving. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 07:26 AM Flag
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Yup -- we're both teachers. HHI is $160-ish (COUNTING our coaching and tutoring and summer camp $!). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 03:11 AM Flag
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yes, about 50k [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 04:50 AM Flag
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yup. about $130 combined [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 07:00 AM Flag
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unfortunately, yes. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 07:33 AM Flag
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yes. well under 100, combined. live in nyc outer borough. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 04:49 PM Flag
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Way less. Aprox $87k on 2 incomes and we live pretty well. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 05:24 PM Flag
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way less. approx. $75k, live in Manhattan, bought apt. ages ago, so only paying maintenance. That makes the difference! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.28.08, 04:11 PM Flag
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This is a strange thread. So many times on ub, posters have claimed discussing hhi and money is tacky and inappropriate. So, This really isn't related to anybody's real life... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.28.08, 07:19 PM Flag
[ - ] dh's friend caught on ashley madison website. what is that? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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Toddler 07.26.08, 08:31 PM Flag
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website for married men looking for girlfriends [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 04:13 AM Flag
[ - ] Ridgewood or Wyckoff? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:30 PM Flag
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Rigid wood and Wack off, think again [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 04:20 AM Flag
[ - ] I am more handy around the house than dh, and I find it so pathetic. 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:22 PM Flag
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Why do you think that is pathetic? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:23 PM Flag
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I don't know how to do much, and I can't believe he is more useless than me in this area. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:24 PM Flag
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Got it. I thought maybe it was some gender stereotype thing :) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:26 PM Flag
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I wish I could do so much more. I hate paying for stuff that I think we should be able to fix. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:26 PM Flag
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Me too - but I find it annoying now. Now I can't get him to do ANYTHING around the house. Just had a big fight about this last night. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 03:52 AM Flag
[ - ] West Side Kids. 0 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:20 PM Flag
[ - ] How long did it take you to lose your baby weight? I am bf now (4 months pp)and I feel huge still.. 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:17 PM Flag
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it took awhile. i started noticing a real difference around 6 months, but i still had a way to go. i had just been doing walks in the park and bf at that point, at 8 months i was 10 pounds away from prepregnancy weight. i started walking more, trying to take a class (CORE class or spinning) and eating a little less and by a year since her birth i was at my prepregnancy weight. now an other year later i am now five pounds below that. it takes awhile - but it will happen. get spanx, especially their miracle pants - i can't tell you how many times i wore those while i was losing weight - they really made me feel a lot better. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 09:04 PM Flag
[ - ] How old were you when you had first dc? 19 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:11 PM Flag
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Had one & only at 30 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:20 PM Flag
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Are you sure you will not have more? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:20 PM Flag
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I am 35 now, we have thought about it. Next summer when I am 36 we will decide for sure, but I really can't see things changing in a year, though you never know. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:22 PM Flag
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When you feel that clock ticking down, you might feel different- when maybe becomes now or never [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:24 PM Flag
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It is possible, but we are very happy with the one we have now & will not have two unless our marriage can survive financially & emotionally. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:25 PM Flag
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You won't know this until you have another. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:26 PM Flag
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Well, I do know our bank account & I know how well we both handle stress. As I said, we will see where we are next summer and make a decision. We will try then, or stay with one. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:27 PM Flag
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ok, good luck on both the marital and financial stuff! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:29 PM Flag
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Thanks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:30 PM Flag
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34 when we adopted #1, 37 when we adopted #2. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:43 PM Flag
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international? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:44 PM Flag
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Nope, domestic. Oldest was born in our state, second out of state. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:45 PM Flag
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29. #2 at 31. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 03:40 AM Flag
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28 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 03:41 AM Flag
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32 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 05:13 AM Flag
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38 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 04:26 PM Flag
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26. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 04:45 PM Flag
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was 33 with number 1, 35 with number 2. 37 now ans trying for number 3 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 04:51 PM Flag
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21. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 06:37 PM Flag
[ - ] Where can I buy Mad Libs books? Would B&N have them? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:09 PM Flag
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internet [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:13 PM Flag
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If you are in NYC, I am pretty sure that I have seen them at Bankstreet Bookstore. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:19 PM Flag
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West Side Kids. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:21 PM Flag
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