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Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] Anyone had a childcare arrangement like this? http://newyork.craigslist.org/brk/kid/772011241.html I live in Prospect Heights, so it looks like it could work...Any insights or or thoughts? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 11:56 AM Flag
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Can't hurt to inquire.... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 12:02 PM Flag
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It sounds interesting but will require you to be extremely flexible and probably will not be less expensive than other child care arrangements. What is her back up plan when kid(s) are sick or she is sick? Do you want to have to build a curriculum and put in all the work/research this person expects? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 12:08 PM Flag
[ - ] Quick! need non-dairy dessert for lactose intolerant friend coming for dinner tonight (his family/our family not lactose intolerant -- sep. dessert for him?) 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 11:55 AM Flag
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sorbet and fruit? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 11:59 AM Flag
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fruit salad. You ca do colorful layers: kiwi, mango, raspberries, orange, blueberries and then por some oj (+vodka if yuo would like, or Cointreau liquor) on top [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 01:52 PM Flag
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can he eat eggs? If so, merengue with fruit. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 12:38 PM Flag
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some sorbet;s are dairy though like haagen daaz is kosher dairy (that means there could be some in there). try sharon's sorbet it is kosher parve - so no dairy at all. very yummy. - my daughter eats it who is dairy allergy [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 01:55 PM Flag
[ - ] Who LOVES their job? What do you do? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 11:39 AM Flag
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SAHM! But then again I loved my job as a prosecutor before I stayed at home so maybe I am just easy to please! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 11:44 AM Flag
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me, I do strategy work for a pharma company. Keeps my mind very engaged when I'm at work but its a great company to work for so I can work from home 1-2 days/wk, they have 6month maternity leave policy, etc. The balance is what makes me happy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 12:50 PM Flag
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actor [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 09:58 PM Flag
[ - ] anyone on who've had an affair or fling? your husband? how long were you married? regrets? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 11:29 AM Flag
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Yes; 2 relationships outside the marriage. The first one began 2 yrs into the marriage. The next one was 7 yrs in. He engaged in a weird one at the same time(7 yrs in)w/a nut, whom was obsessed w/me. I regret both, mainly in terms of failing to be honest ALL AROUND. We survived, thrived and won't be that stupid again. If I'm not getting what I need, I know I won't find it in sneaky sex w/someone else; It's way deeper than that. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 12:18 PM Flag
[ - ] what are your favorite boys names? 0 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 11:26 AM Flag
[ - ] I'm not sure how this site survives. Was just over on Yoube and everyone is there now. 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 11:18 AM Flag
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what is address again? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 11:21 AM Flag
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Really? Everyone? I feel like such a fool... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 11:21 AM Flag
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Sure does seem to be moving faster than this site [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 11:26 AM Flag
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I think this is a fictional site. I can't find it. What is the link? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 11:27 AM Flag
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youbemom.com [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 11:30 AM Flag
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I don't understand why you came back. the youbespamming is so done. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 11:59 AM Flag
[ - ] I am 5 weeks pg but no breast tenderness at all. I thought that I read this was a sign of low progesterone and possible m/c. anyone not have sore boobs early on and did okay? 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 11:18 AM Flag
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my boobs were on and off sore but nothing terrible. I was convinced there was a problem. I didn't believe I was pg! I hate my levels tested and all was great. I suggest you do that too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 11:29 AM Flag
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mine weren't tender for either pregnancy. they just became huge. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 12:48 PM Flag
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me too. then i threw up for 24 weeks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 01:05 PM Flag
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when did you start throwing up? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 01:35 PM Flag
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my 1st pg, my boobs were very sore at 5 weeks; 2nd one, on and off. some people never have breast tenderness and have healthy pregnancies. good luck! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 12:56 PM Flag
[ - ] Should I be waking a 5 week old BF baby during the day to eat? If so, how often? We are letting her sleep at night until she wakes up to feed. During the day we have been waking her every three hours. TIA. 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Newborn 07.27.08, 11:07 AM Flag
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I think you should leave her unless it's more than 4 hours. She won't starve herself and she may be sleeping through a growth spurt which they sometimes do. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 12:18 PM Flag
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I would let her sleep, unless she is underweight or hasn't put on weight. But if she's above her birth weight, let her sleep. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 12:39 PM Flag
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disagree with the above responses. After my first child, I learned that until they are sleeping through the night (9:00pm-7am not midnight -5:00am) wake them at least every three hours (from the beginning of one feeding to the beginning of the next feeding) for a feeding. #2 Slept through at 7 weeks, #3 slept through at 8 weeks [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 01:12 PM Flag
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We did the same thing. Baby will never sleep through the night if they don't get enough to eat during the day. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 01:25 PM Flag
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I woke both of my kids at 3.5 hrs or so during the day and let them sleep thru the night, worked well for both of them [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 01:37 PM Flag
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Rule Number One: Never wake a sleeping baby unless she is failing to gain weight according to breastfed baby growth chart. Competitive BS about sleeping through the night at these early ages is just that. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 06:50 PM Flag
[ - ] Anyone have vacation plans for August? If so what are you doing? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:54 AM Flag
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baby and I are headed to our summer home in Sweden for August. DH has to work which sucks but I have a lot of family there that is dying to see him so it will be fun and relaxing. Can't wait! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 11:09 AM Flag
[ - ] Is there any website that has very similar stuff to ABC for home stuff? TIA. 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:49 AM Flag
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lilly vernon? think that's the name google and you'll find it [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:51 AM Flag
[ - ] Who is on here now? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:40 AM Flag
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1 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:40 AM Flag
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2 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:41 AM Flag
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3 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:41 AM Flag
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23 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:42 AM Flag
[ - ] Any chicago moms on? where can I find inexpensive vintage shops in chicago? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:36 AM Flag
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I'm not from Chicago, but Domino Magazine (I'm pretty sure it's the most recent one) has a whole section on shopping in Chicago with some great vintage shops mentioned. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:43 AM Flag
[ - ] I've heard that when ttc, you should have sex every other day around ovulation. Why not every day - is there any reason? 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:30 AM Flag
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my RE said sperm quality [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:42 AM Flag
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meaning, that it decreases if you have sex every day? If so, should you have sex the day before (and day after) ovulation, or day of ovulation? I ask because I heard that the sperm take at least several hours to fully mature inside your body before they are capable of fertilization. Thanks! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:44 AM Flag
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Take a look at the book Taking Charge of Your Fertility (I'm sure I've mis-quoted the title of the book). But, basically it will remind you of how sperm travel and sometimes having sex on the day of your o will help to determine the sex of the db. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:46 AM Flag
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Thanks. I don't think I'll have time for this cycle (probably ovulating tomorrow or Tuesday and no time to buy the book today), but if it doesn't work out this month, I will check it out. So, do you know when it is best to have sex, in terms of ovulation? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:48 AM Flag
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I think we were pretty dedicated to every other day and it worked for us for both dc (I'm almost due with #2 right now). I think we just guesstimated as best we could. Do you know about taking your temperature every morning to determine when you ovulate. Not necessary, but interesting. Most importantly: have fun during the sex or it really can become a chore! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:52 AM Flag
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OR i was told day before and day after, not only to increase odds but also because time in between would improve sperm morphology, volume, etc. The sex of the db was the least of my concerns! GL [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:53 AM Flag
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you only skip days when you have fertility issues. A healthy man can 'emit' every day and you will be fine sperm quality wise. The skipping is thought to increase sperm count so as to up your odds. If there are no issues then you should be aiming for a 5 day window or so of the 3 days prior to ovulation, that day and the day after to be sure. Works for us! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 11:12 AM Flag
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Thanks. We don't have fertility issues. At least I don't think so because I got pregnant last time (at 26 yo) the second cycle. I just want to optimize the timing because we lost a few months when we would have tried because I didn't get my period for several months after I went off the pill this time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 11:21 AM Flag
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ditto - got pg on first try doing it daily [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.28.08, 03:35 PM Flag
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I heard that there are 2 reasons: 1) sperm can survive for 48hr + inside you and 2) if you do it every day, the sperm count goes down [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 02:05 PM Flag
[ - ] Does the private school crowd ever consider Marymount, Loyola or Sacred Heart? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:30 AM Flag
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Why do you care? Just pick the school that is best for your child. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:40 AM Flag
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DH and I are alums and my question is mosrtly out of curiosity. Is that OK? Why the hostility? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:46 AM Flag
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Of course. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:44 AM Flag
[ - ] I hate HATE that my 3.5 yo son is in daycare 8:30-5:30 three days a week. Feel even sorrier for the kids that are there that many hours 5 days a week. It just feels so incredibly wrong. 14 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:28 AM Flag
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I understand completly. I'm a teacher so a least I get the summer. The werid thing for me is that leaving ds as a baby wasn't as painful as leaving him now that he is 3. There is so much that I want to do with him before he is in school full time and busy with sports and other activites I sometimes feel it's all slipping away. heartbreaking sometimes. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:36 AM Flag
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sometimes there is nothing that can be done. Dh and I work fulltime plus (2dc living in Brooklyn) and the kids are at the babysitter 9-5 m-t and 9-1f [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:45 AM Flag
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I think it depends a lot on the kid and the daycare. Ds is 5 days a week, but a short day, and he loves it. It is so stimulating for him, and he has been with the same children for three years, so they are very close. I think it can be a wonderful experience. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:43 AM Flag
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poster above yea my ds's experience so far has sucked. the kids in my class are so happy and close but my little one didn't get that yet keeping fingers crossed for next year. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:45 AM Flag
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OP: ds's daycare (calls itself a preschool) is wonderful. Small, loving, creative, real teachers, etc. Anyone would say he's happy. But I feel sad (heartbroken) that at 3 yo he is happy because he just doesn't know there's an alternative to a 9-hour day. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:51 AM Flag
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He is happy because he is having fun. His ignorance of other situations and ways of being happy doesn't diminish his enjoyment of his current situation. Do you think that he would be more happy with a nanny? I think that some children need more of an individual and comforting approach, and some children need a more social and stimulating approach (assuming that $ or other issues are fine for both). Or are you upset because you feel wrong that he is not with you all day, every day? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 11:00 AM Flag
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I don't think he'd be happier with a nanny--I think the ideal would be if I could pick him up at 3 every day. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 12:25 PM Flag
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Sounds like you're projecting. My 3yo never wanted to leave school at 3pm becauseso manyof her friends were staying for afterschool. It got so bad we switched her to an afternoon program and just let her stay til 5pm. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 01:09 PM Flag
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what's the alternative? a day takes as long as it takes no matter where you are - this makes no sense [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 12:02 PM Flag
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'Just to paint the picture of what the alternative is: My ds is not in daycare - but with a p/t time babysitter about 14-18hrs week so that I can work p/t. But, as a result, dh and I have much less income to secure for dc. However, I do understand how quickly this time goes by. 'Just know you're doing the best you can and no matter how you arrange it, it will all be fine. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:49 AM Flag
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you have to find a balance i like my job and want to continue and for sure make the most of every minute I spend with my dcs. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:51 AM Flag
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true that! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 11:13 AM Flag
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I really like your attitude. Me, I am not a good sahm, and dh and I work each of us at least 45+ hours/week. But we do not rely on anyone ( gov't, family) to help us out, no credit card debt. Plus, ds will soon start playgroup, then next fall preschool, so i feel like every penny helps. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 11:34 AM Flag
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This post makes me sad. I'm a WAHM and am sending my dd to all day playgroup at my neighbor's in the Fall when she's 14 mos. She is way too active and social to stay with a nanny (we've had 2 since she is 3mos). My dh and I both need to work, so I don't see an alternative. And I feel this is the best for her and she'll grow with this program and enter their preschool when age appropriate. Why does the OP make me feel like a bad mother? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.28.08, 06:08 AM Flag
[ - ] 2 year old just bit another child for the first time. I just removed him from situation and put him to bed. Any good advice to make sure this does not happen again? 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:23 AM Flag
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My dd bit me once pretty badly, I bit her back and explained to her this is what it feels like. She never did it again and it has been over a year [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 02:10 PM Flag
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of couse she misses her finger. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 02:13 PM Flag
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LMAO, thanks! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.28.08, 12:19 PM Flag
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wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong. Shocked face, stern voice is sufficient. Biting your child? Are you completely out of your effing mind, lady? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 06:46 PM Flag
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And did you teach her not to hit by hitting her? Idiot. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.28.08, 09:44 AM Flag
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just watch closely at future playdates and intervene before it happens; if it does happen, be consistent and put in time out; remind child to use words. all 3 of my ds were biters at 2 and grew out of it, but while in the phase it was very, very stressful and required a lot of parenting on my part-could never take my eyes off them when playing with other kids [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 06:51 PM Flag
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Very seriously-Immediately pick up your child and strongly vocalize-"No Biting Ever-That is NOT OKAY!" Allow your child to witness your inquiring as to the welfare and condition of the bitten person and see clearly your concern and sympathy. Immediately leave the setting and keep conversation very simple. i.e. "We are leaving now; You may not be with other children until you understand-Biting is not okay; Biting hurts." It's hard, but stick to it. Your child will ask to go to park/playdate, interactions; these are further opportunities to simply converse on the topic. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.28.08, 09:22 PM Flag
[ - ] OR in post below makes a v. good point below about growing up in NYC and private schools. It was not that we thought we or dc were any better than dcs at public schools it is just that we went to private schools, enjoyed our times there, and just want to send our dcs to what we know. 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 07.27.08, 10:23 AM Flag
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see i grew up in NYC and went to very elite private school k-6, and public after and WAY preferred public. if you live in a city filled with all kinds of cultures, why expose your kid to extreme elitism. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:25 AM Flag
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And, as I said, people like what they know [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:45 AM Flag
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That was me! Moved to Westchester and my DC go to public school and are getting a great education. But had we stayed in NYC, there would have been an emotional-side to it for me. DH and I both work in education -- I know that there are great schools and great teachers everywhere (public and private), but it's not that simple to me (but it is for DH -- b/c he went to public school in the suburbs). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:51 AM Flag
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Is it an emotional decision, or an ego - decision? I understand that we all want to give our kids the best we can, but a lot of these school posts are full of sh..t, ego and mental agony. Get a life! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 02:04 PM Flag
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I grew up in Manhattan, went to both private and public (but mostly private), later moved to CA for a few yrs. and went to public, came back to boarding school, then private univ. so I've been all over the map in the schools dept. am bringing up dds in NJ burbs with excellent public schools so that's where they go. Back in the 70's, at least in my parents' circle and in our neighborhood, nearly everyone went to private school. I did not like my P.S. experience (although it was for only a couple of yrs. in elementary school) at all. However, that is me. I would never pass judgement on anyone else and frankly, I am quite relieved that I live where I do now with outstanding schools and no stresses involved with getting in, lotteries, etc. etc. :) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 02:42 PM Flag
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I get it. I went to public here in NYC and had an amazing experience. My dh is pissed that not only won't I consider sending our dc to private school but that I won't even push to get them into any of the elite public programs. They're going to their zoned school which is pretty good and we're going to be involved parents that make it better. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 04:02 PM Flag
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Wow, you rock. Good for you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 04:06 PM Flag
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You were my mom. It worked through 7th grade, when "white flight" set in, then it was horrible and I was totally heartsick at the "realities" of race from which I had been shielded up until then in my one-big-happy-family 30/30/30 w/aa/h elementary. I went on to Stuy where I wasted soooooooooo much time with the lousy teaching (70% lousy) and suffered from the lack of mentorship -- though there were some plusses (eg, it was cool to be a nerd!) -- it could also have been that I wanted to go to Performing Arts (but Mom wanted me to go "academic" even though I had been accepted at PA). I'm now the Mom who doesn't plan to send dd to school at all (I experienced it in general as such a betrayal, wasted promises, a warehouse with outdated and largely irrelevant curriculum, do-what-you're-told because we have the power and you don't really matter, etc.) FWIW! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 06:41 PM Flag
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So you're a SAHM who is going to homeschool? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 07:21 PM Flag
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yeah [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.28.08, 01:43 AM Flag
[ - ] Piggybacking on the moving from NYC post -- where could we move? Husband's family in Bay Area - but too expensive there. Maine? Vermont? They all seem so lily-white... 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:22 AM Flag
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same question here. Like other OP, I am a NYer born and bred and getting really tired of it, will never be more than middle middle class, and outgrowing my apt with two kids. We're thinking of Boulder. Also lily-white, but a LOT of amazing things about Boulder. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:25 AM Flag
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^^oh, also--we are absolutely NOT going to move to another coastal area--as much as there is that is superior about them, coastal areas are gone, baby, gone. Polar and Greenland ice is melting, the sea levels are going to rise and the east coast is not where you want to be. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.27.08, 10:28 AM Flag
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