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Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] Please help me decide on a highchair: should I register for a stokke or the svan? I'd like one I can use from the start of solid foods and beyond. Most importance is ease of cleaning--I don't want one of the plastic chairs that foods cake into. Thanks. 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:05 AM Flag
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we have a peg perego (sp) that's leather and looks good but they all get food caked in them. its not about the food, its about the kid that's learning to eat. you'll get used to some measure of mess.. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:19 AM Flag
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Love the svan. looks great, easy to clean [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:30 AM Flag
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ditto - we have the svan also. absolutely great looking and solid construction. easy to clean the seat (throw it in the wash) and the plastic tray cover [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 05:05 PM Flag
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ikea [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:32 AM Flag
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The Phil and Ted's MeToo Chair is more practical than a high chair. It's fifty bucks, you can bring it anywhere, and it hooks on to any table. Plus it's tiny and looks good. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 05:03 PM Flag
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stokke. svan is hard to clean. stokke, there's nothing to clean but the table in front of the baby. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 05:06 PM Flag
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stokke. adn you can use it as your kids desk chair down the road. we just got another one for #2. don;t waste money on the seat pad or the plastic contraption that you put in front of the chair. It has a 5 point harness so kid won;t flop forward. it is the best, kid learns to eat at the table, feet stay flat which helps them focus, it is easy to clean and it is not hideous looking. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 05:19 PM Flag
[ - ] Have a new teak table, how do you clean it from regular spills, etc? 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:04 AM Flag
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poor gibbons [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:05 AM Flag
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what's that? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:06 AM Flag
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when you buy teak, you destroy the gibbons forest. poor gibbons [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:07 AM Flag
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oh lord. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:18 AM Flag
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i use household cleaner on mine but it was meant to look aged so I don't worry about how it really looks [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:05 AM Flag
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you can use this oil (it's look like a yellow, jellyish thing in a clear bottle) that keeps it from getting water rings. i have an antique table that has held up well. it dried out a lot so we put this oil on it once a month. it makes a big difference. i think the bottle has a horse on it. i bought at grocery store. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:24 AM Flag
[ - ] did you dye your hair while ttc? 0 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:04 AM Flag
[ - ] define Uber-rich by NYC standards. 16 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:01 AM Flag
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Four times as wealthy as the person speaking. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:02 AM Flag
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making several million a year? multimillion trust fund? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:02 AM Flag
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1 million+ [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:03 AM Flag
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Uber rich in NYC? No way. A million is just 'rich' [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:05 AM Flag
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a Million a year is not rich in NYC [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:06 AM Flag
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If you have your own plane or helicopter to fly to the hamptons or Martha's vineyards [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:07 AM Flag
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people with a million dollars don't have these things. People with a million doallers are worried about their mortgage and they car payment. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:10 AM Flag
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What is it? Upper middle class? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:07 AM Flag
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yep. Lots of people have that, especially if you consider equity in the apartment. Does not mean much in NYC. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:09 AM Flag
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An annual household income of $200,000 puts you in the top 5% for NYC. I'm comfortable saying that $1 million a year is more than UMC. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:13 AM Flag
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We make that, and have no private plane, one 10 year old car and rent a summer place for one month. We save nice amount but definitely far from uber rich. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:15 AM Flag
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I didn't say $1 million was uber-rich. I said it wasn't merely upper middle class. Your family is in the top one percent of incomes in one of the richest cities in the world. You're not middle class, upper or otherwise. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:16 AM Flag
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One million a year is not uber-rich, we make that and are comfortable but not rich [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:17 AM Flag
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Well I was being generous;) You are probably right. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:08 AM Flag
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no way. we make that, and while we are comfortable, we are far from rich. dcs are in public schools (in 'burbs), we have one car, we are not going away for vacation this summer b/c we just aren't comfortable spending the money on that given everything else we are paying for (insurance, saving for college, fixing up house, orthodonture for oldest etc) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:29 AM Flag
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michael bloomberg [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:03 AM Flag
[ - ] If you breastfed and your dh worked and you didn't, how much childcare did your dh do when db was a newborn? 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:55 AM Flag
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I was a SAHD, and I did very little childcare during DW's maternity leave with #1. It took me a while to get used to the kid, and to figure out how to soothe her without the boob. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:57 AM Flag
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When DH got home from work, he'd take DB for a few hours while I napped, showered, whatever. After we introduced bottles of breast milk (at about 3 weeks), he'd done the first nightfeeding (around 11-12) too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:58 AM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:58 AM Flag
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When he was home, we shared childcare 50/50. On the weekends, I would wake up to nurse, and then go back to sleep while DH and ds had some alone time. I rarely pumped, so we were together a lot, but DH did/does bathtime, playtime, meals [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:59 AM Flag
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very little. although he did a good amount of household stuff. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:01 AM Flag
[ - ] i'm embarrassed to ask but here goes. i just watched cutting edge 3 and jackie dorsey said something about "when my marriage broke up due to injuries". what does that mean? did i watch an edited version and this was explained in the full length movie? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:55 AM Flag
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No-- it was just an off-hand remark. I don't know why they did that. Why couldn't they have us believe they were still together? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:02 AM Flag
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i'm guessing they did it to explain the lack of his presence in the movie. but yeah, why make a cheezy happily-ever-after movie and then say they weren't happy ever after? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:04 AM Flag
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She was in the movie a very short time. Can't they just say he was away for some reason? It was a total downer. LOL [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:04 AM Flag
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ita. i feel so stupid for giving it even a second's thought. but come on. what were they thinking! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:09 AM Flag
[ - ] Any really great gift suggestions for DD's first birthday? She's #2 so almost everything she has is a hand-me-down from her brother. Would like to get her something new and special (though not particularly expensive). TIA 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:55 AM Flag
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at that age don't bother [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:03 AM Flag
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I don't think it's unreasonable to buy the girl a birthday present. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:05 AM Flag
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my point is that it won't be memorable nor will it register with the kid so the parent should do what she wants. at that age you really can't give a toy they can play with that is also an heirloom quality special thing. they like anything at that age [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:07 AM Flag
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I'm not after something heirloom quality. I want a toy that a 1 yo girl would enjoy--since most of what she has has are cast offs from her 4 yo brother. If there's some craptastic $12 doll that 1 yos seem to love, that's what I'm after. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:10 AM Flag
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Oh how about some plastic letter shapes? my dd got those when she was 1 and she knew her letters by 2yo (she loved to play with them, I didn't really push it but they are a great learning tool if she is so inclined) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:17 AM Flag
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We have them from DS...not a whole alphabet of course [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:18 AM Flag
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For DD's 1st i bought her a foam chair from pbk. She loved it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:06 AM Flag
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Thanks--good idea [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:07 AM Flag
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And have it personalized. A doll, a ride on toy, baby stroller are also good ideas. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:18 AM Flag
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doll stroller? or toy kitchen -- you can either get the little ones geared to young young kids, or the regular ones geared to toddlers (my 13 mo loved our toddler kitchen immediately). or Radio Flyer scooter for little ones -- she loved that too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:19 AM Flag
[ - ] feel bad for yelling at 4 yr old this morning for jumping in a puddle - she was wearing rain boots but jeans werent tucked in and got ALL wet on the wzy to school - i wish i could take back my reaction - HELP ME GET OVER THIS PLEASE i feel really shitty 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:51 AM Flag
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She's over it already so you should be too. (I did the same thing with my DS this morning, BTW.) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:52 AM Flag
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ita. i also find it helpful to create rules in my own head. before we leave i'll decide whether or not i'm going to allow it and i'll prepare a response. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:58 AM Flag
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it's ok, she's forgotten all about it [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:52 AM Flag
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get over yourself. you sound self indulgent [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:53 AM Flag
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im not at all i just really feel bad, very [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:55 AM Flag
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Screwing up is part of parenting. You screw up, you learn from it, you move on. (Blogging about it is optional.) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:56 AM Flag
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or: ita. apologize to her but dont dwell on it. you'll just feel worse. you yelled this morning, so what? if you said you yelled every morning then you have a problem [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:58 AM Flag
[ - ] What does a positive opk tell you about when ovul. is going to occur? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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TTC 05.27.08, 06:50 AM Flag
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that you will o in the next 24 hrs' [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:51 AM Flag
[ - ] this board is dead - no replies to any posts 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:49 AM Flag
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i know, i just checked in nd now i am back on the other site b/c it's faster than this. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:50 AM Flag
[ - ] Got a positive OPK this morning. WHen should I start having sex to ttc a boy? Also, what does a positive OPK suggest about when ovulation will occur? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:47 AM Flag
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I have 3 ds and had sex the day /night of pos OPK with all 3 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:53 AM Flag
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i think it means should ovulate within 36 hours. i would have sex tonight and tomorrow [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:57 AM Flag
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I'd do it tomorrow and the day after [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:59 AM Flag
[ - ] Why doesn't my DD want to learn how to ride a bike without training wheels? She is 6 1/2. I mean neither DH and I ride bikes as a habit/hobby, but we can do it. Shouldn't all kids learn to ride? 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:41 AM Flag
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my kids don't ride, either. if they're not interested, i don't push it [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:42 AM Flag
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OP. What about roller skating or roller blading? This isn't something I do, but I'm willing to learn I guess. I think she would like it if she learned how to roller blade. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:45 AM Flag
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take her to an idoor rink - fun way to learn and you don't have to buy the skates [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:54 AM Flag
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Chelsea Piers? I don't know of anyplace else. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:59 AM Flag
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sorry, I'm in chicago [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:04 AM Flag
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Yes and she will. I didn't learn properly until I was almost 8 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:00 AM Flag
[ - ] What can I make for dinner tonight - something easy...please please please :) 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:41 AM Flag
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baked ziti. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:56 AM Flag
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baked talapia- Milk, mustard. pat of butter, bread crumbs bake and enjoy! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:57 AM Flag
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dry mustard? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:00 AM Flag
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No spread mustard (I like goldens) in a thin layer across the top [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:05 AM Flag
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so dip in milk or bake in a puddle of milk? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:12 AM Flag
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I pour a little milk over the top maybe 5 tbs so it is just covered in milk [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:15 AM Flag
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ok. so you spread a thin layer of mustard, put a pat of butter on it and then coat with bread crumbs and splash on some milk. bake at 350 for about 15 minutes? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:17 AM Flag
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Omelets + salad + crusty bread [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:01 AM Flag
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shrimp sauteed in butter and garlic. 3 minutes prep and 4 minutes cooking time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:06 AM Flag
[ - ] How much movement did you feel at 23 weeks? Still only feeling it now and again and wondering if this is normal or I should call ob... 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:41 AM Flag
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that sounds about right to me. it was awhile before I started feeling it reliably (28 weeks maybe)? dd was never a big kicker. i felt the most movement from 34 weeks on because she was too big to hide anymore. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:52 AM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:53 AM Flag
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ITA. Call if you're concerned, but this sounds pretty normal [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:54 AM Flag
[ - ] I went to a very exclusive private school on scholarship. No one "knew", but I also didn't get a fancy car for 16th brithday or go to Europe every summer or even have a live in housekeeper. Don't get me wrong, I got a fabulous education which has served me well in life, but if you think just becuase you can get your kids into a fancy school and figure out a way to pay for it that they will be happy there you are wrong. I was reminded everyday that I didn't have money and it sucked. 45 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:40 AM Flag
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do you have money now? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:41 AM Flag
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not like those kids I went to school with. I am a professional and DH is a professional, we have a HHI of about 275k, which I think is comfortable, for where we live now. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:43 AM Flag
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You also need to realize that not everyone feels that way and with the price of tuition there are plenty of people who earn in the 300K range who pay for private, but for whom it is a stretch and they do not go to Europe every summer or have live-in help. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:44 AM Flag
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"you" may not, but I am not talking about how you or I would feel as parents I am talking about how my child wold feel as a 15 yo girl who sees her friends getting everything they want and she can't or worse, being consdiered the FA kid, becuase she doesn't have what they have. You are looking at it from the mind of a rationale adult, not a teenager. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:47 AM Flag
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Again, not all teenagers get everything they want either because tuition is a stretch (as it is for many many people), or because of values. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:50 AM Flag
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and...you comment doesn't address the issue. Just becuase there will be a group of poor FA kids for the rich kids to pick on doesn't make it any better. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:54 AM Flag
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Are you not reading the comment. Not all the kids who don't go to Europe every summer are on FA. There is a wide range of people who send dc to private and many are not uber rich. Of course many are, but there are a large percentage who are not. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:57 AM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:44 AM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:47 AM Flag
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If it doesn't work for you, that's fine, but for some kids who may or may not be have nots in public school anyway, this is a great opportunity for them to succeed. It can present them with opportunities (or attention) they may not have had in another setting. (Honestly, I think middle school and high schooolers can be cruel anywhere whether wealthy or poor, and as a high achieving black student it was better for me to be among wealthy kids than poor black kids who would have taunted me for "acting white" for trying to do well in school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:50 AM Flag
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I thought unless you can fill there multi racial quota - you will not get accepted being white when there are so many white/caucasions with mney and good score so there's no need to accept a white family needing financial aid. If I'm not right then tell me which school, a dd or ds, how much financial aid, what were the test scores? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:49 AM Flag
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Of course it is harder to get FA when you are white, but not impossible. We got FA and were told that, yes, diversity helped us. That said I know several white families who get aid. Look at CGPS b/c they give a lot of aid 40%. Also, MCS is on a sliding scale. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:51 AM Flag
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what does CGPS stand for and MCS? which schools are these?' [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:54 AM Flag
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Columbia Grammar and Prep School and Manhattan Country School. Rather different schools and you may not like both, but it is worth checking it out. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:56 AM Flag
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thanks appreciate- your ideas. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:59 AM Flag
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Your welcome. Also, Cathedral School gives about 33% of their students aid. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:03 AM Flag
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^^^ you're [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:04 AM Flag
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^^^ also, no school want all the FA kids to be children of color, so some white kids do get aid at all privates. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:55 AM Flag
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OP: I am talking about my experience, as a student, which was about 20 year ago. I have no idea what the quotas and stats were then, nor do I know what they are now, since I have no intention of sending my kids to private school.. But you sound a little defensive no? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:53 AM Flag
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^^^their [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:53 AM Flag
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This was my experience as well. I HATED high school because the social stuff was hard since I was in such a different place financially. In hind sight, though, I'm glad I had such an amazing academic experience. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:51 AM Flag
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ditto. as my mom said, it was "character building." lol. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:53 AM Flag
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op: I agree, it was character building, but it was High School not the Marines. I would liked just to fit in a little better. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:56 AM Flag
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I hear what you're saying, but I don't know if that's really possible in high school. There are always the cliques and the Queen Bees, regardless of whether it's a wealthy private or a huge public. I guess at least at a big public you have the chance of getting lost though. If you talk to a lot of people, they hated high school -- and they didn't go to an exclusive private. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:01 AM Flag
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Exactly and there was class warfare at my public just as intense, if not more so, than what OP describes. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:02 AM Flag
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NP: Maybe, but in some of these private schools, the "upper class" is so much higher than you can even contemplate it if you're not a part of it. The people I went to school with (not in NYC) had private planes, boats, etc. It was a different world. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:04 AM Flag
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I agree. But for me, in my school, there was a definate line between the rich kids and the FA kids (the only kids that weren't "rich"). I guess, if you went to a public school where everyone was of generally teh same soci-economic background there would be other reasons for kids to single each other out. But for me, I would want to make it easier for my child, not intentionally give her more obstacles. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:04 AM Flag
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Having been solidly middle class at a private school with the town royalty, and therefore one of the "poor" ones though I was not on FA, I hated high school and middle school but still think the education was worth it. I am sure I would have hated them regardless which was my original point. I think a lot also has to do with the kids's personalities. I would have been a geek anywhere, and I was taunted at private, but probably would've gotten my ass kicked at public! lol. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:09 AM Flag
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^^^kid's, not kids's -- so much for private school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:10 AM Flag
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Heh--my parents really didn't get that money was such an issue among students. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 06:57 AM Flag
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op: this was the point I was trying to get across. as a parent you don't neccessarily get the class "warfare" that goes on, as a former kid who lived it, I wouldn't want to do that to my kid. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:00 AM Flag
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Gotcha. Exactly. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:02 AM Flag
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But you will not avoid that by going public either. Most publics in good areas also have very wealthy families and kids competing for stuff. Fancy vacations, cars etc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:05 AM Flag
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yes, there are definately people of different incomes there, but in a public school that draws from the community, eveyrone there is a little more euqal just by virtue of living in the same community. You don't have kids with private jets and kids who need to take the bus. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:09 AM Flag
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Exactly. One of my high school classmates had her own private island in the Bahamas (or her family did). For real. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:12 AM Flag
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Are you serious? Come out to Westchester. DH and I were house shopping the other day in Chappaqua. THere are gorgeous estates as well as townhouses. The townhouses go for 669K (not cheap, imo) but they are not very nice. We thought about how hard that would be on a kid to go to school with the children of celebrities (lots live in Chappaqua) and be living in the townhouses. Believe me, the disparity exists outside of private schools. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:16 AM Flag
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I try to impress upon my DD that there will always be someone that has more than you and always someone that has less than you, and that it is really pointless to think about what you "don't have" and appreciate what you do have. It's a hard lesson to learn, esp. in the NYC metro area, but it's really necessary. There is too much focus and high value placed on materialism, especially in NYC/NJ/CT area and not enough emphasis on character and morality building IMO. At the end of the day it is all "stuff" and what's really important is personal character, integrity, family and relationships. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:18 AM Flag
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and then they all held hands and skipped down the yellow brick road! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:25 AM Flag
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np: She is right. We live in Manhattan, and there are plenty of people that have a lot more, and plenty who have a lot less. It's a lesson kids have to learn sooner or later. Sooner is prefered to me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:28 AM Flag
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np: i have a sibling in HS in the burbs and believe HS anywhere is character buildings. teens are brutal! I remember thinking it was hell ( and i was popular kid) went to small suburb school which was considered great. HS sucks! But i hope dd gets a great education no matter where she ends up [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:03 AM Flag
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Exactly! I think everyone wants the best for their kids. We all have diff't ideas of how to get that though. Good luck to everyone. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:18 AM Flag
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i hear what you are saying. but i don't know how much it applies today. for a couple of reasons. i work in a school where a good number of the kids are really wealthy. but even the unwealthy kids now can do a lot of stuff the wealthy kids are doing. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:06 AM Flag
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but this is true at public school too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 07:30 AM Flag
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I went to a TT girls' school here in NYC about 15 years ago. In my class of about 40 girls there were amazingly wealthy families, many affluent families, many on FA, and a ton in between (including many not on FA who were really struggling). My family made too much to receive FA, but not enough that tuition for 2 girls was not really, really hard. Money was an issue in our family, but was never one at school. Some of the most popular girls were on FA or struggling--and several of the girls were had the most difficult time socially were extraordinarily wealthy. Money was not a factor in popularity or how one was treated. Did I have classmates who took stupendous vacations and have several vacation homes? Sure. Did I have classmates who lived in sprawling, beautifully appointed apartments while I lived in a shoe-box? You bet. I babysat for ALL my spending money (including clothes) while one or two others used their mother's charge cards. I was still popular, made good grades, and was included in everything. When the subscription charity balls rolled around, we borrowed dresses from each other and pooled our resources to buy tickets for a friend who really couldn't afford it. Frankly, I remember one really good friend of mine who got to do everything for free (whereas I had to sometimes sit things out) b/c other people's families would pay her way. By middle school, her mom just assumed that an invite to do something meant that her expenses would be covered (special clothing included). My family was too proud--so I would turn something down if we could not afford it. That was our choice--and that is life. My parents felt and cared about the income disparity FAR more than I did. No one ever teased or made me feel less than because of it. My friends were still my friends. I have spoken with my former classmates about these issues recently, and they all felt the same way. This does not mean that everyone has fond memories of school--some people felt the cliques were terrible, but admit that money did not play a role in this equation. I had many friends in the suburbs who were far more materialistic than we were in the city, so I don't buy this whole thread. Does it happen in NYC? I'm sure it does--and I do think that this day and age is more materialistic than when I was in school. I do not think that the issue is as simple as public vs. private, though (in a good, thoughtful private school that is well run). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 01:41 PM Flag
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Money matters just as much, if not more, in a suburban school. Just ask a kid (or his mother) in the tiny house on the "wrong" side of town. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.27.08, 01:43 PM Flag
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