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Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] what kinds of things do therapists do when a kid needs OT? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Toddler 06.22.08, 06:44 PM Flag
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depends what's wrong with the kid. that's like asking what does a doctor check for when you go to them because you're sick. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:45 PM Flag
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Der. You're right. Truncal hypotonia. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:49 PM Flag
[ - ] do you visit youbemom.com too? 17 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:42 PM Flag
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doesn't everyone [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:43 PM Flag
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i just went for first time, feeling eh about it, too [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:50 PM Flag
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not really. Weird vibe to me. Every once in awhile I go over there but I always come back [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:44 PM Flag
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rarely [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:44 PM Flag
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I'm mostly there. I just stopped by here for variety, and I've got to say, I'd like to be loyal to UB, but YB is way better, just as an interface. It's better than the original UB too because it has more functions. Are the two communities different to people? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:47 PM Flag
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they seem different to me [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:49 PM Flag
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How so? I haven't been here much lately, so I haven't seen the split. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:50 PM Flag
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I havent' been over there lately but they seem really self congratulatory about having put one over on UB. Maybe that has toned down by now but it was really annoying. That and the whole "the goddess loves us" thing creeped me out. For all anyone knows, the "goddess" is some 50 yo white guy living in his mother's basement getting his jollies listening to them. Just weird to me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:52 PM Flag
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Oh, I totally agree about the initial smugness. I was resistant to it at first, but that seems to have worn off, and whoever ol' purple-print is, s/he's doing a kickass job with the coding. I can't imagine that it's some perv -- it's totally believable to me that it's a woman with a coder dh, which is I think what she said initially. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:55 PM Flag
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it's believeable, but so is the 50yo in the basement. Just a little odd. For some reason, I find myself strangely loyal to UB though. ;-) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:57 PM Flag
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I guess I'm just torn. I want to be loyal, but I find this interface so clunky, it's hard! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:58 PM Flag
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really? I have no prob with the format. I just am angry that everyone left. Maybe that's why I don't want to switch. It's like changing your religion because your church built a new sanctuary with the bathrooms in the hallway instead of the basement. It's just the look - not the content [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:00 PM Flag
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i don't trust it [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:51 PM Flag
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What does that even mean? What's not to trust? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:51 PM Flag
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np I feel the same way. Who knows who is really running it? At least UB is run by a big company with rules and protocal etc [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:53 PM Flag
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this is what i mean. i don't want some random UBer having access to my IP address, kwim? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:16 PM Flag
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same here [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:27 PM Flag
[ - ] FSBO mom from last night...had open house today and lots of brokers stopped by. Many said they would market it to their clients provided we paid 3% to them as a buyers broker. Now I'm just wondering if they are lying to me since the broker on last night said RE brokers would have nothing to do with FSBOs - on the other hand, why would so many of them waste their time to stop by? 80 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 06.22.08, 06:41 PM Flag
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The broker from last night had no experience in the NYC market. She worked in CT/MA and was clueless about the process in NYC. The real question is, are you comfortable paying the 3%? If you can reach enough potential buyers, you could be fine with just your and the buyers attorney's working on the deal. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:43 PM Flag
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oh, is that where she worked? I missed that part which I guess was pretty important. We are fine paying 3% so I guess we'll just wait and see what happens. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:48 PM Flag
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Yes. She had never heard of buyers or sellers hiring their own attorneys (standard in NYC). She thought buyers would sign exclusive agreements with buyers brokers (which doesn't happen in NYC). And she primarily sold very inexpensive homes. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:50 PM Flag
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but of course, she is an re agent who knows it all [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:51 PM Flag
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Well, she couldn't seem to understand that a RE attorney would know the market as well as a broker. She assumed a lawyer would use zillow for market information. But when every closing is attended by a buyers lawyer and a sellers lawyer, the lawyers end up knowing MORE about the market than the brokers. Not less. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:53 PM Flag
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Brokers don't have an income when people figure out how to buy and sell without their participation. Of course they are intimidated by FSBO and attorney negotiated transactions. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:54 PM Flag
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yes, but if you have no clue how it works in nyc, don't answer. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:57 PM Flag
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lol, yeah, she said the lawyers were going to be done away with in Real Estate, when in fact, with the internet, it will likely be the brokers. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:00 PM Flag
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You absolutely need a lawyer in order to buy or sell a home. I'm not sure why you need a broker. Brokers are like stylists. Nice to have, and they can make your life easier. But you don't need them. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:01 PM Flag
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itttttta [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:02 PM Flag
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yeah, I remember the lawyer banter starting but didn't follow it all the way through. We will certainly have a lawyer representing us! I'm sure people do sign exclusive agreements with buyer's brokers, but probably because they don't know any better! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:58 PM Flag
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Hi, I am the realtor from last night. I am ignoring the self-serving attorney above but I curious about Brokers checking out your FSBO. Did the Brokers come with clients? Where are you located? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:05 PM Flag
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at least you get chutzpah points for showing your face again, clueless broker [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:06 PM Flag
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right, not sure why you are wasting your time with me - go away [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:07 PM Flag
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true, you don't have a clue and you give advice re markets you know nothing about. you need a scarlet letter [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:10 PM Flag
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we are in manhattan in a pretty desirable neighborhood. None came with clients today but several wanted to 'advertise' it, take their own pics. I basically said they can do whatever they wanted to get a client to call them 1st (vs me) and I'd pay them 3% if their client bought our apartment. They seemed fine with it...it's just one more place they have on their list of places to show. I guess I'm just curious why you wouldn't do the same (show a FSBO to a client of yours, provided you'd still make your 3%??) It's money right? Who cares if the listing broker isn't an agent? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:17 PM Flag
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not a broker - they will show it, and honestly, it's cool that they want to advertise it. The only way it's going to hurt you is there is a perception that FSBO is more work, so anyone showing it isn't going to push it as hard. But honestly, have you ever had an agent talk you into buying a house? You either like it or you don't. I'm assuming that it is in the mls so that anyone using an agent will see it if it meets their parameters (if it's not then you do have problems). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:22 PM Flag
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There is no mls for NYC [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:24 PM Flag
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nothing computerized? How do brokers know what's on the market? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:27 PM Flag
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the New York Times Real Estate Web site is the closest thing to an MLS in NYC [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:28 PM Flag
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So a broker gets paid 3% for reading through a public list of apartments for sale and driving their clients from open house to open house? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:32 PM Flag
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No. Your broker doesn't even drive you to open houses. Sometimes you meet them their for appointments, sometimes you go alone and mention your broker on the sign in sheet, and sometimes they go to open houses with you. But you are on your own for transportation. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:35 PM Flag
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the NYT site doesn't just list open houses. It lists apartments for sale via private showings. Most of the ads for apts are placed by listing brokers so a buyer can just call the listing broker directly if they want to. In manhattan it seems pretty easy to go without either a seller's broker (if you have the time to show your place yourself) or a buyer's broker (if you can surf the NYT site a couple times a week) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:38 PM Flag
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no, you have to take the subway yourself. No broker is going to drive you around manhattan! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:46 PM Flag
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So what does the buyers broker do for you? And why should someone make a commitment to one? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:50 PM Flag
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they arrange for you to see the apartment. I've never heard of someone making a commitment to one in NYC. You walk into Corcoran's office, tell them you want a 2 bdrm, they show you some of the listings they have. If they are really working for you they may call their friend at halstead and show you one of their listings but then you could go to the prudential web site and see a place you like that the corcoran person didn't/wouldn't tell you about....bizarre. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:55 PM Flag
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Why can't you call the listing broker yourself to see the apartment? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:56 PM Flag
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you can do that...that is what we did (we didn't have a broker as a buyer) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:03 PM Flag
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Brokers tend to focus on the properties that their firms are selling first (highest revenue for their firm). Then they look at competing firms listings. But there is no MLS like you see elsewhere. Brokers don't have access to "better" information about availability than anyone else. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:30 PM Flag
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OP: exactly, it's the lack of an MLS in NYC that drove me to FSBO it in the 1st place. Although I noticed in this sundays NYT their was an article about FSBOs and it mentioned a web site to advertise FSBOs where you could pay extra to have your property added to your local MLS....but that doesn't apply to NYC [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:27 PM Flag
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huh, I had no idea that there was any place that didn't have it. Honestly, that makes me think that FSBO might be real tough. The people that showed up to your open house were most likely trying to get you as a client, I doubt that they were really interested in marketing to others, they were just hoping to make a good impression on you. It doesn't matter whether it is fair or not, agents have no incentive to do anything that seems like it may be more work, they are a fairly lazy bunch. Where there is mls, the agents don't have any control over what the client sees, so the client picks out the houses they are interested in, not the agents. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:35 PM Flag
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Same thing in NYC. Only instead of going to one site, apartment hunters look in the NYT and on the sites of the various brokerages. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:37 PM Flag
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then wouldn't it be easier to discriminate against FSBO than in other areas? Agents are really opposed to them, so can't they just ignore you? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:40 PM Flag
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Of course they can. But the market is pretty efficient and buyers find the FSBO's because they tend to be a bit cheaper (offset by lower fees). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:44 PM Flag
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OP: Of course they can ignore me...but my original question though is why would they? Just based on principle alone? If I work for X my client likes an apt listed by firm Y and buys it, I'm getting 3%. If firm Y is instead a FSBO and I still get 3% why would I pass that up? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:49 PM Flag
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are there a lot of buyers out there that are going it without an agent? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:36 PM Flag
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Most buyers don't have an agent. Either the buyer is unrepresented and the seller's broker keeps 6%, or the buyer's lawyer acts as the broker (if so licensed, and most are). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:39 PM Flag
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so if a buyer goes to a broker sponsered open house that he saw in the Times and doesn't have a broker, his lawyer, if a licensed RE broker can lay claim to a share of the selling brokers commission?? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:45 PM Flag
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Only if the seller's broker agrees to it. Which they generally do. In NYC, lawyers do most of the work for a transaction. Contracts, reviewing the buildings financials, the board packages, the share agreements, the subrogation agreements, etc. Brokers know that hostility with the lawyers isn't helpful. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:49 PM Flag
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I have to laugh at board packet...that is the biggest PITA for the buyer more than anyone, having to gather up all that financial info...then the broker puts it in a binder and takes credit for 'assembling' the board packet [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:52 PM Flag
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That is laughable. When I asked my broker about her document retention/security procedures, she looked at me like a deer in the headlights. So I had my attorney handle it AND collect the packages from the board when the process was over. Last thing I needed was someone tossing their package in the trash. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:55 PM Flag
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that was really smart of you. I had board packets in my apt from other sales that I didn't know what to do with but knew better to throw them in the trash. I finally called the person it belonged to and gave it back to them (because my shredder only shreds 1 page at a time) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:58 PM Flag
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Can you imagine what would happen in my social security number, bank statements, brokerage statements, loan statements, pay stubs, etc were all lost TOGETHER? Identity thief's dream. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:00 PM Flag
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OK, right now I'm picturing the homeless person on our block who wears a winter coat and ski pants under black garbage bags tied with twine talking in your voice in one of those identity theft commercials [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:06 PM Flag
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I don't know...we didn't use one when we bought our place. We just spent any weekend we had free for the better part of 2 years going to open houses from the Times. Granted we weren't in a hurry....and when we went to brokers way back then and said we wanted a 3 bdrm for under $750K they all said it was impossible and wouldn't work with us (yet that is what we bought - and for a lot less) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:42 PM Flag
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Why would anyone use a broker in such a system? It doesn't sound like they do anything really and in NYC you are talking huge commissions... I now know way more than I probably needed about the system, I really hope dh never seriously gets it into his head to move back;) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:45 PM Flag
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As above, the lawyers are essential. The brokers can be helpful, but aren't required. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:51 PM Flag
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honestly, at 3-6% of sale of the apt., that's just insane. I have no idea how much op is selling for, but assuming low end (b/c I hate math) house goes for 1 million, she pays $30,000, for what? I think that I need to move to NYC and become a broker... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:56 PM Flag
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OP: well, if you want to, I'll offer you the same 3% if you find my buyer - that's about 45K in your pocket ;) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:02 PM Flag
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hahaha, my sister is thinking about buying next year, maybe I should convince her to do it this year instead;) Good luck to you! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:04 PM Flag
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Yes. They dragged their clients from Connecticut to see her apartment in NYC. Stick to the markets you know. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:18 PM Flag
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Why are you so worried? It sounds like you have a plan why are you asking again? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:06 PM Flag
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My suggestion is to set a deadline for yourself. If you haven't gotten any offer in 3 or 6 months (depending on what the market is like in your neighborhood), then you will think about getting an agent. Many agents will be nice to you, hoping if they seem helpful and friendly, they will get the listing if you decide that FSBO isn't working for you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:08 PM Flag
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Nothing like a house with 130 days on market to really get the interest flowing. That is the death knell in our town. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:10 PM Flag
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I know a bunch of people that wait too long. Make sure you are priced right, it is harder to get up to date comps without an agent, but I gather NYC real estate market isn't falling like most of the country, so this isn't as big of a deal. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:16 PM Flag
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What is your town? In NYC, that's nothing. You can't close until the co-op board approves (easily a 90+ day process, longer in the summer) and it is not at all uncommon for one or more buyers to be rejected. In fact, the more desirable the building, the more likely the apartment will sit on the market. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:20 PM Flag
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Things in the DC 'burbs are starting to tank. My friend bought last may and has lost 25% of the value of her house. I said if she didn't get any offers within a certain period of time to think about getting an agent, that time frame is area specific, but even if it takes a long time to close, she would still know if she was getting real interest as a FSBO. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:26 PM Flag
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But OP is in NYC. You can't compare across markets. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:33 PM Flag
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I know I can't, but certain things are just common sense, i.e. if you don't get an offer in 9 months, you have a problem. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:37 PM Flag
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Are we talking offer or are we talking time on the market? It it is time on the market, NY has totally different standards than the rest of the country. You can't have a coop on the market for 30 days. It just isn't possible to get a contract signed, a package together, and board approval that fast. And boards don't approve every applicant. So long time on market metrics don't say much about the marketing strategy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:41 PM Flag
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so do most people get an offer within 30 days? Why can't you have it on for longer? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:48 PM Flag
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I meant you can't have a co-op on the market for only 30 days. A fast transaction will take at least 90 days. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:53 PM Flag
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oh, I was starting to get extremely confused as to how they even knew, etc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:59 PM Flag
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Pretty easy to back out how long an apartment has been on the market. Harder to determine how many times it has been in contract. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:02 PM Flag
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As I said multiple times, offer, not the process of going through closing... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:50 PM Flag
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No one will ever know when you got an offer. All they will know is the total time on the market. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:52 PM Flag
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How was the turn out of Buyers? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:11 PM Flag
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I think we had about 5 buyers and 8 brokers show up. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:18 PM Flag
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5 buyers on a beautiful beach day is a good turnout. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:21 PM Flag
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didn't the forecast call for t-storms? Anyway, I don't think any of them were interested, which is why I think we need a broker to bring us a buyer...the broker can sort of 'pre-screen' people to make sure they are 'right' for the apartment. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:25 PM Flag
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T-storms for the late afternoon. No one was rushing home today because of the weather. You can hire a broker if you want to. But don't expect much pre-screening. A broker will help potential buyers understand the apartment and the building. But they don't do much to control who shows up for an open house or an appointment. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:28 PM Flag
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I feel like I've just watched a soap opera. This has to be the most twisted way to sell anything that I've ever seen. It almost sounds like buying a house in a third world country. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:01 PM Flag
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Did anyone explain subrogation to you yet? That's where it gets REALLY crazy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:03 PM Flag
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oh please do... I am enjoying my laugh so much.... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:05 PM Flag
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At least now I understand why you all ripped that agent from last night a new one... I thought that you were being mean, but I doubt she knew any of this stuff. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:07 PM Flag
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She was trying apply her knowledge of very specific, local real estate market to NYC. And she looked foolish. We weren't being mean. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:10 PM Flag
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^^^ But you can't download these agreements from "realestatecontracts.com" and expect your broker to fill them out for you! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:14 PM Flag
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Hey! We made it to the top of the 'most popular topics list'...which means...I've been on waaaay too long! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:14 PM Flag
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OK. When you buy in a co-op, you don't buy the apartment. You buy shares in the corporation that owns the building. If you need a mortgage, the loan is for the shares, not the actual apartment. Follow? OK. Now the co-op maintains the first right to the shares in case you default on your common charges. But no one will write you a mortgage unless they have collateral. So you need the coop board and the mortgage company to enter into a subrogation agreement that maintains the coops rights and gives the mortgage company some rights as well. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:08 PM Flag
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I'm listening too! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:08 PM Flag
[ - ] I can't figure out how to search the nyc school site-- only reason i used to log on-- doesn anyone know how to do it? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:39 PM Flag
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I don't think you can search just one forum. Just have to put in your search term and hit go.... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:42 PM Flag
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yup. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:44 PM Flag
[ - ] want to move out of the city want a cool town, 40 minutes or less from NYC, good schools, we aren't rich. any recs? thinking of westchester county but someone said the people there are annoying...Long island? we are in the UWS now. 85 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Toddler 06.22.08, 06:37 PM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:38 PM Flag
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i don't know a good feel to it? laid back, fun stuff happening, pretty/..and I am way to UNHIP for williamsburg. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:39 PM Flag
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Try Great Neck. Amazing park system and an easy commute to NYC. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:41 PM Flag
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Great Neck is not for the income level she is alluding to,it is also not known as a very friendly place. it is has mostly Iranian Jews so if she is not one of them she may feel excluded. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 05:46 AM Flag
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port washington [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 05:33 AM Flag
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I second that! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 08:03 AM Flag
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LOL. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 06:40 PM Flag
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Lol. Westchester is a pretty big place. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:40 PM Flag
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i know that's why I wanted a rec! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:43 PM Flag
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I was reacting to "people are annoying" post. My sis likes Pleasantville, but I can't say it's cool. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:46 PM Flag
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oh..she didn't elaborate, I was hoping someone else could. I think she was meaning pretentious [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:00 PM Flag
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I live in Mt. Kisco, and I really like it - moved from UWS 6 years ago. 50 minutes to midtown. Lots of shopping, sidewalks (!!), really down to earth people (lots of UWS transplants). We're zoned for the Bedford schools which are great. My DS has really thrived in his school. It's true that some people in Westchester are annoying, but you need to find "your people". Don't chase the top school, or the best commute, or the cheapest taxes, because ultimately, these things will not make you happy if you sacrifice your quality of life. Find what works for you. Spend a day in Kisco, or any other town you're thinking about and see if you like it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.29.08, 03:13 PM Flag
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larchmont [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:41 PM Flag
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You will get a wider price range of homes in Mamaroneck and may also have a better sense of belonging if you KWIM depending on your HHI. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 05:45 AM Flag
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What is KWIM? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 09:54 AM Flag
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np: know what i mean [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 04:28 PM Flag
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Ardsley is nice -- good schools, nice people there. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:45 PM Flag
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Red Bank, NJ? A little farther than 40mins though I think [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:49 PM Flag
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Bad schools and long commute. But a cutish town. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 07:48 AM Flag
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search crunchy, i asked similar a while ago and got a bunch of good answers [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:18 PM Flag
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Mamaroneck, I can't believe how great it is here. People are very nice, it has a beautiful waterfront park and great neighborhoods in different price ranges, drive around the diif neighborhoods south of the railway tracks and the waterfront communities to appreciate the variety of homes for diff income levels available. There are two school districts Mamaroneck and Rye Neck. Mamaroneck is for a part of Mamaroneck and all Larchmont residents and Rye Neck is for a part of Mamaroneck and a part of Rye residents. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 05:44 AM Flag
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^^^Mamaroneck school district has one of the best performing arts programs in the country. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 06:10 AM Flag
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Hastings [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 07:02 AM Flag
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More like 50 minutes, but you could try Old Greenwich. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 07:07 AM Flag
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They say they are not rich and you all are suggesting Larchmont, Mamaroneck and OLD GREENWICH! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 07:09 AM Flag
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Old Greenwich is great, great water town, great feel, good schools, but you also need a budget of 2.5m plus [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 06:06 AM Flag
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What you want does not exist. You can get two of your three easily. All three is impossible. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 07:21 AM Flag
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Most of these posters are not being very helpful. Mamaroneck could be an option def, also people like Ardsely, Irvington. in NJ (which I'm more familiar with) try maplewood, montclair, westfield. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 08:08 AM Flag
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in case you're still watching...i grew up in westfield & did not like it there (left wing jewish family). would not call it cool, and would definitely not call it crunchy [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 06:02 PM Flag
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Rockland? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 06:05 PM Flag
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I live in Long Island, wont say what town, its too wonderful and I dont want lots of ppl moving here. Its perfect the way it is. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 06:31 PM Flag
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Thanks for sharing. But you should know from reading on these boards that Long Island sucks hugely. Enjoy your little vacuum-sealed world. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 07:16 AM Flag
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And Long Island is notorious for not only the most obnoxious vocal accents, but breast cancer clusters!!! What fun. Oh my gawd! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.25.08, 03:50 AM Flag
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Karma [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.25.08, 06:01 PM Flag
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yeah, what is up with those accents?!? Even in upscale places like Garden City, people sound like they're from Bwooklyn, ya know? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.29.08, 06:41 PM Flag
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Glad you think that way, please stay away. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.27.08, 12:51 PM Flag
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What town? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 01:32 PM Flag
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suffolk county - eastern long island - best kept secret [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.27.08, 12:54 PM Flag
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are you italian or irish? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 06:40 PM Flag
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ITTTA. Me too [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.29.08, 12:48 PM Flag
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things are getting more affordable in Nyack and Piermont; Parts of Mt.Vernon are feeling good lately, too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 11:17 PM Flag
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I'd stay away from Mt. Vernon is Westchester, but I second Pleasantville. What are you looking to spend? You never know what people mean by not rich on this board. I consider not rich spending under 700K on a house, whereas some people think it's a million. If you're in 700K land, then Pleasantville or Mt. Pleasant are your best bets, and the beauty of Westchester is that all of the towns are very close to each other, so you can live in Pleasantville and hang in Chappaqua or White Plains or wherever. Also, if you don't have to be close to the City, Mt. Kisco is awesome. It has your chain shopping, but also has town charm. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 03:39 AM Flag
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another vote for pleasantville. just moved here and love it! friendly, laid back and very pretty. Not really "crunchy" though. Good schools too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 06:06 AM Flag
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Agree with Mt. Kisco. Really nice town, great places to hang out. It was rated best family town in Westchester last year. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.29.08, 06:36 PM Flag
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Hastings on Hudson or Dobbs Ferry [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 05:06 AM Flag
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We aren't rich and we live in Maplewood, which is definitely a cool town. People here have their heads screwed on right, too, and there is a nice sense of community. Plus terrific arts. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 05:27 AM Flag
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Not cool [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.27.08, 12:03 PM Flag
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Maplewood is NOT COOL. i grew up there. also, it's arbitrary to say that people have their head screwed on right. itda. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 06:29 AM Flag
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Maplewood sucks ass!!! I live there too and hate it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 04:33 PM Flag
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pelham. you can get a decent house for $800k, taxes are high, but community is nice, schools are good and it is very close to the city. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 05:53 AM Flag
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in nj summit, short hills, ridgewood. in westchester tarrytown, katonah (1 hr from city), mt kisco, larchmont, pleasantville, sleepy hollow, nyack. in ct norwalk [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 06:10 AM Flag
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short hills, cool? no way. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:46 PM Flag
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agree. lol. short hill is like the antithesis of cool. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 04:35 PM Flag
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nyack is the only town people have mentioned that is at all "cool". South Nyack is totally affordable. Very laid back, lots of arts, cools little stores, and definately pretty. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 06:48 AM Flag
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I like Nyack, but it's farther than 40 minutes from Manhattan, and the Tappan Zee bridge will have to undergo MAJOR construction for many years. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 07:15 AM Flag
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disagree. Nyack is still pretty funky. I'd give it a couple more years. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.29.08, 03:16 PM Flag
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Is NJ out of the question?! Morristown, Summit and Westfield are my top picks. All have trains to Manhattan. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 06:56 AM Flag
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np: millburn too [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 07:08 AM Flag
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I aesthetically like all of those towns and agree they are so nice, plus Ridgewood, and would think of them myself ($800K budget giver or take) but they are not really solving the issue of getting away from snobby people. Millburn has a "poor" section with houses around $700, a 35 minute rush-hour commute, a town pool, and a little town. South Orange next door is more crunchy/artsy with a different vibe, worse taxes but cheaper houses for the same money, a different school situation that you might like more or less than the Millburn one. I think you'd have to go and look around. These suggestions seem like good ones for NJ, and the Westchester ones do too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 07:48 AM Flag
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You should look at Maplewood and Montclair in NJ.They both have large creative communities. The schools are good in Maplewood and Montclair. The nicest people I know have moved to Westfield. I think Summit is snobby. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 03:47 PM Flag
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Maplewood/South Orange share a school district. South Orange has the more expensive sections. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.27.08, 01:17 PM Flag
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They are't "cool" and "hip". [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.27.08, 12:04 PM Flag
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agree! they are more like "loathsome!" [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 04:36 PM Flag
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What is it with you guys? What did we do to you? (I live in Maplewood and like it here.) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 07:29 PM Flag
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Just moved from NYC to Garth Road in Eastchester (Scarsdale PO). 1400 sq ft coop for under 350K. Eastchester schools are highly ranked, door to door school bus servie. 27 min express train to NYC - 10 min walk to train. Playground across the street. Lots to do in village. I'm soo happy there [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 08:43 AM Flag
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i have a friend who lives there and she raves about the schools and life style [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 08:47 AM Flag
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We're in Eastchester, too, and really like it (technically in the village of Tuckahoe). Good schools, easy commute (six minute walk to train), shops and restaurants, short hike to White Plains or Yonkers for stores like Target. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 03:25 PM Flag
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Are you still on? I am moving to Garth in about a week and I am totally freaking out about it. I am a real city girl, but you are like the 5th person I have heard who lives there and loves it, so I am hopeful. Although I think we may have overpaid a little. We 1300 sq ft and paid 395k, but it is really beautiful shape and has huge closets, new appliances, etc. But we acutally had our offer accepted in December right before really starting dropping. We just haven't actually moved yet. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 09:07 PM Flag
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I'm pretty sure she said she IS NOT RICH. How could she possibly afford places like Larchmont/Mamoroneck? I think if you're looking for not rich, good schools, relatively close to NYC, you definitely should lean towards Long Island than Westchester. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 09:53 AM Flag
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ON LI, there is Sea Cliff which isvery artsy, also Port Washington has a huge range of housing. Huntington and Northport are slighly further, but you could get what you are looking for. In Westchester Hastingson the Hudson and Irvington. I am not as familiar with NJ, but Montclair [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 12:22 PM Flag
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I grew up in Port Washington. It's a great town - I still go back frequently (live in NYC) b/c my folks are there. It has a lot of wonderful things going for it, but I definitely wouldn't say it's hip or cool. More down-to-earth than neighboring LI towns (though getting a little more chi-chi these days as RE has skyrocketed in the area). I'm struggling myself w/whether to move there since it kind of offers everything, except the hipness thing which I'm still working through in my quest for a suburb I can see myself in. Sea Cliff seems more our speed, but it's teeny tiny, houses are also teeny tiny and expensive, and the commute is sucky. sigh. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.29.08, 07:39 PM Flag
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Sands Point in LI is lovely. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 01:32 PM Flag
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LOL. and you are lucky, you can get a house for under 3 million. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 02:38 PM Flag
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bay ridge [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 02:39 PM Flag
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^^fwiw, we were about to leave bay ridge for jersey, but we just found a new construction condo for $499k. 2bed/2bath in a great location. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 02:41 PM Flag
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We're moving from Brooklyn to queens. so far the people I've met are pretty down to earth. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 04:50 PM Flag
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Glen Ridge in NJ has excellent schools, proximity to "cool" towns like Montclair & Bloomfield; direct train line to NYC [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 07:46 PM Flag
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We moved there on the suggestion of my Aunt (a school superintendent in NJ) that the schools were tops. My kids ended up being 2 years behind their friends in NYC. Good is relative. NJ public schools love to talk about how great they are. Ugh. Lot of facilities; but no content. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.25.08, 03:52 AM Flag
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I recommend Princeton, NJ. I have been living here for 2 years and just love it... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.24.08, 07:51 PM Flag
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Yes, but not within 40 minutes of NY [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.27.08, 12:05 PM Flag
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Hastings on Hudson, Dobbs Ferry, Irvington, Ardsley - all on the Hudson in Westchester County. Good to very good schools, decent housing prices but taxes can be on the higher side. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.26.08, 06:09 AM Flag
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Since you mention the Hudson towns - why not Croton a little farther up, so much more affordable than southern Westchester, but still with express trains (I think 45 minutes)? Don't know how 'hip' it is though...? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.29.08, 11:09 AM Flag
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40 minutes from NYC? You realize that you're choosing between Clifton NJ and Yonkers [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:50 PM Flag
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Eastchester. Tuckahoe. Rye with Mamaroneck schools to save money and taxes. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 12:54 PM Flag
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How about Riverdale? Schools good through elementary. Incredibly diverse, 20 minutes to midtown, totally laid back. I wouldn't say it's a "cool" town but there is so much near here: botanical gardens, wave hill, arthur avenue, etc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.01.08, 05:45 PM Flag
[ - ] Did anyone do an early pregnancy test (ie: 2 days before period), get a negative result, and then ultimately test positive after missed period? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Toddler 06.22.08, 06:37 PM Flag
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YES!!! You really do need to wait until you are due to have your pd. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:38 PM Flag
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If you read the box it says that it is only a certain percent accurate before your pd is due. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:39 PM Flag
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ok [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:40 PM Flag
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Did it 2days after missed pd and it was negative, 5days post period finally came back positive. If you're convinced you might be pgs, keep checking! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:50 PM Flag
[ - ] Going back to work FT tomorrow, have babysitter at house for 2 yo DS. What instructions am I forgetting to leave her?? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:35 PM Flag
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Name and number of pediatrician, dentist, closest (desirable) hospital, someone besides you to reach in an emergency if they can't reach you, ambulance service, obviously your numbers etc, poison control number. Note any allergies, how and when you want ds to eat, sleep etc. Note if TV is ok, and if so what and how much. Where local parks are. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:47 PM Flag
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Who might stop by or pop in (neighbors,family) Answering the door, not answeringthe door [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.16.08, 05:30 PM Flag
[ - ] hey, what do you ladies know about overeaters anonymous? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:34 PM Flag
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Just like AA. You have to believe in a higher power and that you are powerless over your overeating. Personally, I believe that the emphasis on being powerless is counterproductive. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:35 PM Flag
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a friend of mine called me recently, told me she joined oa, and that she was apologizing for wronging me 12 years ago. it was odd. we haven't spoken since that time, but not for any specific reason, or cuz i felt "wronged" [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:44 PM Flag
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True. You have to apologize to everyone you have wronged (unless confronting them will cause them more pain). It is a social cure for a medical/psychological condition. If you had anorexia, would you seek treatment by apologizing to the girl you teased in summer camp? Of course not. But AA/NA/OA/etc work differently. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:46 PM Flag
[ - ] DS played with a friend over the weekend who had another friend over. That friend was very aggressive and now my kids are literally covered in bruises. Ds said the friend of the friend just didn't know when to stop. 16 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:30 PM Flag
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no big deal. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:31 PM Flag
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covered with bruises? I think it's a big deal, and I have a very rough and tumble 5yo ds. (np) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:34 PM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:36 PM Flag
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OP: I didn't make the previous response. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:37 PM Flag
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Did you notice the "np"? I think if a child is playing that rough, someone should talk to him, that's all. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:38 PM Flag
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op: the hosting parent did speak with him once we realized what was going on, and then we left. Just a different level of aggression. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:39 PM Flag
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sounds about right then [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:41 PM Flag
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Where were the adults?? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:31 PM Flag
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We were in another room (the kids are 11 years old, so we don't usually need to watch them very closely). Things just got out of hand, very fast. Then we left. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:36 PM Flag
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Oooo, 11 yo. I didn't see that NP above. How upsetting. Make sure to give that other kid wide berth. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:39 PM Flag
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I would be upset & call hosting parent [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:36 PM Flag
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Your 11 year old should be taught how to get himself out of a difficult situation such as this. Come up with different ways he could have "escaped" and saved face. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:42 PM Flag
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what should he have done? (not be sarcastic - looking for some good language to use with him) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:46 PM Flag
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This is at home later when you noticed the bruises. YOu have dh say, what the heck happened. child says, that kid was rough and just didn't know when to stop. Dh says, oh, yea I remember a kid like that in my xx class. Its hard, you are scared but don't want to show it and you have to really think on your feet to get out of there without everyone making fun of you. Could you have just said you wanted a drink or something and come thru the living room? Then maybe involve yourself in our conversation for a while, or say something to your friend about this dude not being cool and see if your friend is as uncomfortable as you are? There is safety in numbers you know... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:51 PM Flag
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Thanks - smart advice. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:54 PM Flag
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and see if dc has any ideas and tell him, he did ok. He's not hurt, its good practice and to just be aware of how to get out of a bad situation if he needs to [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:56 PM Flag
[ - ] Due with db #2 in another month. No maternity leave income so my lack of income is frightening to me! Any suggestions? Sell stocks? 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:30 PM Flag
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i think there's a website where you can find jobs for stay at home moms- try hiremymom.com [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:31 PM Flag
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Thanks. That's a start. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:37 PM Flag
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is it scary because it's different or will you really have trouble paying the rent? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:36 PM Flag
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Both. But, but our expenses have increased with dc #1 starting school in the fall. I had an income while on maternity leave with #1 but I ended up cutting way back on work in the past 2 years and now I'm in this predicament. Dh really doesn't earn enough to be the sole provider. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:41 PM Flag
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so I'm assuming ythis will be short term? Don't worry about it. This is why God invented credit cards. I am not advocating going hugely into debt but a few weeks and charging some extra stuff that won't get paid off for a few months is no big deal. Just enjoy that baby [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:43 PM Flag
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You can collect disability from the state for 6 weeks for a normal delivery and 8 weeks for a c-section. It's not a lot of money, but it is better than nothing. And now is a good time to sell stocks. Capital Gains tax rates are probably going up in the near future. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:40 PM Flag
[ - ] I miss NYC 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:29 PM Flag
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If this is my friend Julie in LA, then move back already!! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:32 PM Flag
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OP LOL! Actually I never lived there. DH and I just visited last week and had such a good time. I'm home and everything seems really slow and boring. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:34 PM Flag
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ny gets old fast [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:35 PM Flag
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so does everywhere in one way or another. NYC is just so different from Atlanta. Don't get me wrong - I love Atlanta but NYC is so much more and so amazing. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:37 PM Flag
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It's easy to miss a vacation spot if you've had a great time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:00 PM Flag
[ - ] myc moms... if you decided to move to the suburbs and it could be anywhere in the country, where would you choose for good schools, good proximity to a city, and interesting work? 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Toddler 06.22.08, 06:29 PM Flag
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northern va [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:29 PM Flag
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ugh. commutes from hell. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:30 PM Flag
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depends on where you work and where you live [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:32 PM Flag
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Grew up there, and for the most part, blech... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:47 PM Flag
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Austin, Texas. Great for high-tech. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:33 PM Flag
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Cary, NC or Madison, WI [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:34 PM Flag
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santa barbara, ca though just as exp (real estate wise anyways) as nyc [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:47 PM Flag
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Mill Valley, Sonoma, Marin [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 09:14 PM Flag
[ - ] feelings towards the name TEAGUE? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Expecting 06.22.08, 06:28 PM Flag
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Don't get it [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:30 PM Flag
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i think it is a great name, especially if you are irish [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:32 PM Flag
[ - ] Do you feel bad if your child doesn't get invited to a birthday party? 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:28 PM Flag
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sure, it's rejection, however petty it is. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:28 PM Flag
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yup [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:29 PM Flag
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No. I was talking to some other parents about that. Mostly the ones who feel bad are projecting how they felt when they were kids. For some reason this was never an issue for me as a kid, so if my ds isn't invited to a party, I assume that they just couldn't invite everyone, which is usually the case. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:32 PM Flag
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Nope one less gift to buy. I just don't tell my child. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:33 PM Flag
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No. Not every family can have every single kid for a birthday party. Someone had to get cut, and this time it was you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:34 PM Flag
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yes, although I know he's not close to every kid it still bugs me a little. OTOH, when he had his party, we only invited his best pals, so I'm a hypocrite. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:35 PM Flag
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Only if my child feels bad. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:52 PM Flag
[ - ] dh isn't the kind of person who is happy just because the sky is blue and it's sunday, he says this is not a trait of people who are ambitious. i disagree. 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:27 PM Flag
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My DH is neither ambitious nor optimistic [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:29 PM Flag
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I see his point. If a sunny day makes you happy, you don't need to seek satisfaction or self-esteem in your work. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:35 PM Flag
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I agree with you. My dh is certainly ambitious, but he is generally a "glass is half full" kind of guy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:36 PM Flag
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I also disagree. But it is true that people who are bipolar or suffer from depression tend to be ambitious risk takers who can achieve some very ambitious goals. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:37 PM Flag
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I think you can see the beauty of the moment and still be ambitious, but I would agree that people who are more "Zen" tend to be less ambitious. Ambitious people tend to be A-personality types who always want more and better. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:38 PM Flag
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totally disagree. i'm ambitious, competitive and somewhat successful. but i also know that a beautiful day, or a nice meal with my family can be satisfying. stuff of life. gotta keep it in perspective. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:40 PM Flag
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it jad nothing to do with ambition, imo [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:44 PM Flag
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I love optimists, could not imagine being married to someone who wasn't [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:52 PM Flag
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