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Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] Anyone else reading "How to Childproof your Marriage?" I was skeptical but I am finding it useful 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Newborn 06.22.08, 06:02 PM Flag
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how so? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:03 PM Flag
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it is pretty dead on in terms of the struggles that occur when a child enters your house (divison of labor, point system, the way your world gets completely turned upside down) and it offers decent suggestions for improving things [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:04 PM Flag
[ - ] just went in to check on 8 mo - she's sleeping on her tummy (for the first time). is it ok? or do I have to turn her over? tia. 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:01 PM Flag
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fine [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:02 PM Flag
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as long as the crib is free of plushy toys ect.. fine. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:03 PM Flag
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It's fine. Don't worry. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:02 PM Flag
[ - ] I married a Basset Hound, but should have married a Golden Retriever. My dh opeates on such a different energy level than I do. It drives me nuts, because I end up doing almost everything around the house. Anyone else in my shoes????? 20 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:59 PM Flag
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Do you ever read this board? Does ANY DH ever do their share around the house? Ever? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:00 PM Flag
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my dh does it all. i'm a sahm, and still dh does all the cooking, and grocery shopping, bills, and after dinner he either puts dbs to sleep while I clean up or vice versa. i'm pretty lucky. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:06 PM Flag
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how does he have the time to cook? Do you eat at midnight? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:09 PM Flag
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he gets home at 5:45 - and usually dinner's served by 6:30. and good dinners too - fish, chicken, steak, etc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:13 PM Flag
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So I have to ask - he is supporting your family and is able to make enough $$ working 9-5? What does he do? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:14 PM Flag
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hi - i'm back - yes, we're lucky that his hours are so good - he's in-house counsel/biz dev and basically makes his own hours. takes 5 o'clock train, home by 5:40 and onto dinner - and always in such a good mood. I got lucky. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:24 PM Flag
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I can't even imagine. That would be a complete role reversal for me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:17 PM Flag
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you need to train your dh. he's using you [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:00 PM Flag
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I feel like a nag. I totally don't get this. Had a dad who never knew when to sit down, and my dh that is all he does [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:02 PM Flag
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so I recently picked up "Childproofing Your Marriage" at the library. I am half way through and I think it is pretty good. You should check it out. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:01 PM Flag
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any suggestions on this? He is great with pitching in with kids, it's the mundane stuff -- keeping up with the house [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:02 PM Flag
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yes, this book has suggestions...you need to take a look ;-) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:05 PM Flag
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no, i like to think of my relationship in horse terms. he's a stallion and i'm a wild horse. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:02 PM Flag
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you need to talk breeds...quarter horse, thoroughbred, pinto, paint...c'mon [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:03 PM Flag
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op was the one who started it not me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:04 PM Flag
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Hey I was just using an analogy here. Basset Hounds being lazy, Goldens working dogs. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:05 PM Flag
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my dh [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:05 PM Flag
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so how do you deal with it? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:06 PM Flag
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I don't. He does. I hate housework and cooking and am generally kind of lazy. DH is not a really high-energy guy, but he does more than his share in terms of housework. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:18 PM Flag
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I married a dalmation, runs all over like a maniac, super hyper, makes a big mess and breaks a lot of stuff. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:19 PM Flag
[ - ] I've had 2 m/c in = 0 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:53 PM Flag
[ - ] Anyone place parents/ILs in assisted living? ILs are not doing so well, and we need to start thinking about where they'll live if they can't live alone. Right now they winter in fla and spend summer in NJ. We would like them to consider moving to assisted living in nyc because all the family is here and we could see them all the day. Also they would be able to get around by bus when they can no longer drive. Is this a crazy idea? 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:48 PM Flag
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It could very well be crazy if they do not enjoy NYC (like my parents). Also may be very much more expensive. Are thre areny nice AL places near thier NJ residence? Where in NJ? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:02 PM Flag
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if they can afford it, i think its a great idea [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:03 PM Flag
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It isn't crazy, but it may be overly optimistic. I put my grandparents on the wait list for several assisted living facilities in Manhattan. This was 2.5 years ago. In the meanwhile, they are living in assisted living in Nassau County. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:04 PM Flag
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They may prefer to be in a warmer climate in the winter. We moved my grandparents to assisted living further north, and they complained constantly about the cold weather. They have since moved back to Florida (year round) and are much happier. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:29 PM Flag
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That's what we worry about, but it will be very hard to see them if they're down in fla year round. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:42 PM Flag
[ - ] My just turned 3-yr old dd has overnight become a different kid. Temper tantrums, no no no, extreme rudeness, aggressive behavior, peeing in her pants again (she's been potty trained for over a year) and fights me on every single routine we had finally established. Is this the terrible 3's I've heard about? I don't know if I can take a year of this. Please give me hope. 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Toddler 06.22.08, 05:47 PM Flag
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probably just a phase [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:47 PM Flag
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any sibs? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:48 PM Flag
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yes, one younger. 8 months old. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:48 PM Flag
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that is why. you have to pay more attention to the older one. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:49 PM Flag
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all of the sudden? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:50 PM Flag
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yes it can happen when they get older and start to realize they are not the center of your world. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:51 PM Flag
[ - ] Seems dead. How many of us are on? 13 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:46 PM Flag
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me (OP) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:47 PM Flag
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me #1 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:47 PM Flag
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me, if you're bored answer my house Q! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:48 PM Flag
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here [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:49 PM Flag
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what was it? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:49 PM Flag
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Just sold our house and need to make a decision on which to buy- 1) brand new home on main road, byt 2 acres and set back in great town, 2) brand new home in ok neighborhood, but definitely best house on the block (others are smaller/older) in great town or 3) amazing home in great neighborhood in ok town. All towns within 10 miles of the other and when I say ok town as opposed to great town, the school testing is not as high. WDYT? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:51 PM Flag
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i would opt for the one with the most free delivery sushi places. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:54 PM Flag
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blech, no such thing as good sushi delivered unless maybe you live right across the street and order in japanese. raw fish doesn't travel well, that's one of the main reasons to live in the city! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:58 PM Flag
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np: no such thing as good sushi! hate the stuff! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:06 PM Flag
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hard to say, but probably the first one [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:55 PM Flag
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np: I agree. number one seems to be the best. I am not a fan of best house on the block (will not sell well later), and an OK town would not do. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:06 PM Flag
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need more info. How are the school districts? How big are houses? What type of heating? Garages? etc., and near by culture... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:17 PM Flag
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hey [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:07 PM Flag
[ - ] If you lived in a good school district would you opt out on all the G&T madness? 25 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:46 PM Flag
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we do, and we didn't. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:46 PM Flag
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we do and we are sending dc to citywide - a lot of it has to do with middle school and over-crowding of our zoned school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 07:37 AM Flag
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Same here. We are zoned for 3 and went with 11. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 01:20 PM Flag
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Yes. I am zoned for an excellent elementary school across the street. I saw no need to test for programs that would require running dc all over Manhattan. And they are thriving in their environment. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:47 PM Flag
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dare I ask where? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:52 PM Flag
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PS 183 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:54 PM Flag
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then you are good for a few years- enjoy [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:57 PM Flag
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I am. And then we will reevaluate our position. Maybe we will do the testing thing, maybe we will move to the suburbs, maybe we will do the expat thing again. For now, dc are doing very well. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:59 PM Flag
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Another happy 183 parent here, but DC is in younger grade. Might look into private/moving around 4th grade more to avoid high stakes testing than anything else. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 01:15 PM Flag
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depends on your kid and how well dc tests. what PS? if 41 I would definitely opt out as 41 treats each child as "gifted" [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:47 PM Flag
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I'm not even in the game this year, but isn't treating every child as 'gifted' a *good [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:56 PM Flag
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^^ a *good thing [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:59 PM Flag
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Its not. When you treat unequal people equally its never a good thing. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:18 PM Flag
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Yes. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:00 PM Flag
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we do, we did. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:17 PM Flag
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We moved to a good district after the g&t testing but before k placement. Registered at zoned before bothering with results. We will not participate in the 1st grade madness. Happy to stay where we are now! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 05:49 AM Flag
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We found out the hard way through dc#1 that a "good" school really isn't always a "good" school. Totally depends on the teacher. Our high-scoring, reasonably gifted kid has suffered in general ed in one of the top schools in the city. We did not make the same mistake with dc#2. Thankfully. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 06:06 AM Flag
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This is what I suspect of our local zoned "good" school. I have toured it several times, and it just leaves me unimpressed, yet everyone in the neighborhood raves about it. Luckily we did the G&T process this year and ended up with a placement we're very happy with. But it's hard to really pierce behind the reputations/word of mouth of some of these zoned schools, and figure out for yourself whether it's a school you want your child at. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 06:16 AM Flag
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Same thing can happen in a "good" g&t or "good" private, though. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 07:24 AM Flag
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true. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 07:26 AM Flag
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Having been through botg good G&T and good gen ed programs, I still find it's a bit of a crapshoot. Much more dependent on having good teachers, as opposed to any supposedly great program. No guarantees in NYC publics. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 09:34 AM Flag
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we do and did [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 07:29 AM Flag
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No. Dh and I went through all of the ELA and Math scores for the top gen eds in Manhattan, Long Island and the stand alone G&Ts. The stand alone G&Ts (Anderson, LL) had the best scores by far, with top LI schools next, and the top Manhattan schools were lowest (comparable basically to the mediocre Long Island schools). Based on this, we decided it would be a G&T program or a top suburban school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 09:36 AM Flag
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Did you end up at a G&T or did you move to the burbs? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 09:40 AM Flag
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Ended up with G&T placement [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 09:40 AM Flag
[ - ] Anybody who's db was late at feeding himself and eating bik kid food? I'm trying to be patient but sometimes i feel like giving up, db is almost 14mo and still eats mostly puree chews and spits most of what i offer ect 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Toddler 06.22.08, 05:45 PM Flag
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how many teeth? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:46 PM Flag
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3 on the bottom and 5 on top [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:46 PM Flag
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sounds like regression. i would talk to your ped. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:50 PM Flag
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she said he is about 6 months behind and to keep encouraging but its going soo slow, i feel like pulling my hair out some meal times, he eats the same thing over and over, i offer new things and textures daily [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:52 PM Flag
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I've got a 17mo that's the same. Has just started feeding himself cheerios in the last month. Still spits out anything that isn't pureed, and doesn't like new things much. My dd was the same way, so I am not worried, just tired of it. Lots of yogurt, purees, etc. Your dc will be fine, just hang in there. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:53 PM Flag
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thanks, he puts cheerios and puffs in his mouth but its pureed chix with carrots mixed with db cereal at meal times, no avocado or pasta or beans, tofu ect, he is not behind at other things btw, what about your dc? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:55 PM Flag
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same... and my dd was the same. I was worried with her since she was my first. now I am just trying to figure out if it's my kids or my parenting style that's causing this. dd, now 4, eats fine (still picky, but can eat). don't worry too much about it. just keep offering and don't get too frusterated. this too shall pass. gl. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:57 PM Flag
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have you tried giving him really soft foods that he likes? bananas, fruit, cheese? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:54 PM Flag
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have you tried cottage cheese with pureed fruit? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:57 PM Flag
[ - ] What does LL stand for? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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NY Schools 06.22.08, 05:45 PM Flag
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An elementary school in D2. It is K-5 and has two classes of test into (gifted) children and a self contained special needs class. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:19 PM Flag
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Lower Lab [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:20 PM Flag
[ - ] I'm new to NYC: District G&T are not considered as prestigious as Citywide G&T schools? 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:45 PM Flag
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rotfl! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:53 PM Flag
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honestly, get a book and read what is best for your db [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:54 PM Flag
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It's less a prestige issue than a curriculum one. Citywide g&ts have accelerated curriculums, while District programs are essentially the same curriculum as general education classrooms with ' some enrichment'. Prestige doesn't really apply to elementary public education, outside of the caught up dispositions of some parents. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:55 PM Flag
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The US Naval Academy is prestigious. Programs for children are not prestigious. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:56 PM Flag
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lol [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:20 PM Flag
[ - ] What does LL stand for? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:44 PM Flag
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lower laboratory [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:45 PM Flag
[ - ] My sexual drive has significantly slowed down after my mother died about 2 years ago. We still have sex but I used to be the initiator and now I do participate, but it feels more obligatory. I hate feeling like this. DH has said nothing. Perhaps he hasn't noticed but has anyone else gone through this after a parent dies? 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:42 PM Flag
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low grade depression [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:44 PM Flag
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i think you may be right. maybe I should go back to therapy [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:47 PM Flag
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well, how old are you? Why do you assume that is the reason. Libido changes with age, unfortunately. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:45 PM Flag
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OP: only 35. really? I thought I was in my "sexual prime" whatever that is??? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:47 PM Flag
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well, you're young so my observation does not apply to you. Maybe you're a little depressed. My mom died 7 years ago and I cried about her today. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:49 PM Flag
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thanks. i think i may have some unresolved issues with my mom on top of losing her so maybe I should go see someone. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:51 PM Flag
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Sounds like you are depressed. This dh went into a deep tailspin after losing my step-father five years ago. I dove right into therapy like a drowning man grabbing onto a log. Therapy was long and often painful, but it did wonders for me. Just be prepared that you might come out as a different version of yourself. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 09:57 PM Flag
[ - ] What does LL stand for? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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NY Schools 06.22.08, 05:41 PM Flag
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lower lab school [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:42 PM Flag
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and what is that? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:49 PM Flag
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a school [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:51 PM Flag
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It's generally considered the most coveted public school after Hunter and Anderson (and sometimes Nest), located at 96 and 3rd, only kids who reside in District 2 are eligible. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:02 PM Flag
[ - ] I have a medical condition that makes me nauseated. I threw up at work on Friday, and KNOW the rumor around the office is that I am pg. How do I address? Ignore? 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:38 PM Flag
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i would ignore or say you had some bad shrimp [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:40 PM Flag
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ignore. when you don't gain weight, they will know. but they may think you are bulemic! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:40 PM Flag
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Let it go and move on. Addressing it calls attention to it which fuels the rumor mill. Another diversion is bound to present itself and people will forget about what happened to you. Sorry that happened, it must have been embarrassing for you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:40 PM Flag
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go out for drinks with coworkers. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:35 PM Flag
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If only I could! I don't drink, so that would just make things worse. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:36 PM Flag
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I bet they think you are bulimic [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:37 PM Flag
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just tell them you have meniere's syndrome and to google it [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:51 PM Flag
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