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Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] There is a huge difference between giftedness and high achievers. Many of the high scoring kids are probably high achievers rather than truly gifted. Of course, only time will tell. 23 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Preschool/Kids 07.06.08, 08:37 AM Flag
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And you felt the need to post this why? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:43 AM Flag
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In the end - there is little difference [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:45 AM Flag
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ita. it's what you do with what you have. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:58 AM Flag
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Time may never tell and the high achievers may do much better than those you are deeming as "truly gifted." [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:48 AM Flag
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np: Exactly. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:56 AM Flag
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I agree, high achievers are more focused and work harder. Gifted kids sometimes just coast on their natural abilities, which doesn't always serve them well when they get into the big bad world. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:58 AM Flag
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np: well also, sometimes things are easy for them when they are younger and then when the material gets harder they haven't been used to the need to try and work so they get frustrated and can run the risk of giving up. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 09:00 AM Flag
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np; this is the reason why the gifted community advocates for schools for the gifted, so that they are properly challenged and not take things to come easy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 09:01 AM Flag
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I don't know about that. 2 yo's who read the New York Times may be high achievers but they are certainly gifted. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:59 AM Flag
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there are two yo's that can read the times? are the comprehending what they are reading? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 09:00 AM Flag
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Not sure. I read about it, but even if they don't comprehend, I think it's remarkable that they can even decode all those words, don't you? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 09:05 AM Flag
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np: It's pointless to read material you can't understand, serves no purpose really. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 09:21 AM Flag
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Well, but at 2yo, it does indicate intellectual ability. That kid will be able to comprehend far more than other kids when he does comprehend. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 09:29 AM Flag
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OP: I'm not talking about any child in particular. Just the process in general. I think there is so much prepping and enrichment that the high scores reflect both giftdeness and high achievers. That's all. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 09:19 AM Flag
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I think what they are looking for are kids with academic ability, high achievers are far easier to teach than gifted kids. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 09:22 AM Flag
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High achiever is what you want, no? Those are the kids that will go places. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 09:20 AM Flag
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If you are gifted and a high achiever, you will really go places. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 09:30 AM Flag
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I have a dd going into 5th grade and she's tested as pretty darn "gifted" but she is about the furthest thing from a high achiever there is. i'm learning to readjust expectations because i don't think she's ever going to be very academically motivated. she's too into her own things. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 09:29 AM Flag
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This is a common issue for gifted dc's. I think you should find a school that is better for your dd. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 09:31 AM Flag
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HIgh achievers are likely to do well anywhere they are placed. And they will do well in later life, usually. Gifted children are at greater risk, unless they are also high achievers. Gifted children are often self-directed to the point where they dont' care about pleasing teachers. Gifted children want to study teh things that interest them, not the things they are given to study. Gifted children are used to things coming easily and resist challenges. Gifted children will coast and then suffer self esteem issues when they can't push themselves to compete or overcome difficulties. Gifted children are often precociously "moral" thinkers, and will not take the injustices in a classroom in stride. Gifted children - I have one - are a PITA. But that's why their parents and the gifted ed community thinks they need to be put together and taught in specialized ways. Because they are not shoo-ins for academic success despite their intelligence. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 12:39 PM Flag
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Mine is only in 2nd grade but I think we're going to have to make the same readjustment of our expectations. It's frustrating. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 02:16 PM Flag
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Both need an accelerated curriculum or they are underserved. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 03:30 PM Flag
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High achiever sounds good enough for me! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:30 PM Flag
[ - ] How much do you spend a week on groceries? How many in your household? TIA 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:17 AM Flag
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easily $200 and 4 of us. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:26 AM Flag
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probably about 100-125 for 3 of us (not inc. diapers, formula) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:31 AM Flag
[ - ] Just ordered $400 worth of Matouk towels from some store in Illinois (to avoid tax!). Hope it's worth it! :) 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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Toddler 07.06.08, 08:10 AM Flag
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FYI: I think you have to pay tax if you live in a state with sales tax. Enjoy the towels. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 09:18 AM Flag
[ - ] SAHM with four kids and feel like I have nothing to talk about with adults other than kids. Help. 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:08 AM Flag
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I felt that same way as SAHM to 2 DCs. Recently I started working part-time (for money but also to rejoin the adult world), and I still feel like my world is pretty kid-centric. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:18 AM Flag
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I know what you mean but there is always reading. And the internet makes you much less isolated information wise. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:27 AM Flag
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are you saying that the only thing WOHMs have to talk about is work? that sounds amazingly boring. Let's see, it a year with the most exciting presidential election of our generation. Perez can fill you in daily on hollywood gossip. you can read the NYTimes every day and listen to NPR. There. heaps of things to talk about. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 09:41 AM Flag
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I hear you. It's sometimes hard for me to turn off the "all kids all the time" channel in my head and remember the rest of the world. When I need to chat about something else, i rack my brain for what I read in the NYTimes or heard on the radio (I have npr in the background constantly--my main connection to the outside. I'm a sahm.). Sometimes it's just the slimmest thread, like "I saw a headline that named the 11 healthiest foods. Did you see that?" But often that's enough to get me in another direction. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 10:15 AM Flag
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I'm a SAHM with 3 kids and I love it when I am in a situation where I"m not talking about them. I wish there were more conversationalists on the playground, frankly. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 10:17 AM Flag
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even though you're busy, your obvious interest in your children should lead you to care about issues that will impact them: education, global warming, etc. read a bit on line about these things and then not only will you be able to talk, you'll want to talk. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 10:32 AM Flag
[ - ] ds will be a year on the 19th. he is just 20 lbs - can i turn his seat forward facing or should i wait out the 2 weeks? 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:02 AM Flag
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Eh...I'm paranoid so I'd leave it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:04 AM Flag
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do you know why it has to be a year? i understand the weight but not the age? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:09 AM Flag
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np: muscle control (neck and torso) and height. just wait. better to be safe than sorry. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:16 AM Flag
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I don't know why....I know that rear facing is always safest--maybe at around a year kids start getting too big to sit comfortably in that position? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:17 AM Flag
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DD was about the same at her 1 year bday. We kept her rear facing for another couple of weeks, but then she started getting v. carsick, so that's when we turned her. Would've gone longer rear facing (a few more weeks or months) for extra safety, but she decided for us. . . [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 10:13 AM Flag
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Rear facing is safest. If it doesn't bother DB, leave him rear-facing. Once he starts to complain about the view, then turn him around. It's about the neck in a front or side-impact crash. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 10:21 AM Flag
[ - ] armonk, bedford, pleasantville, chappaqua - any info you can give me? DS has an IEP for ST and OT - he's apraxic. heard good things about these villages + schools. tia 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Toddler 07.06.08, 07:54 AM Flag
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of those, chappaqua has the "best" all-around reputation accrd. to all the nat'l rankings. byram hills (armonk) also rates high. don't know how they do with kids with IEPs. p'ville has good rep for kids with IEPs, plus it's a more down-to-earth district so ds might not feel completely ostracized b/c he's not a super-achiever, kwim? bedford central depends on which elementary since a couple have high hispanic populations so all spec. ed. focus is on ELL, not traditional IEP. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:16 AM Flag
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thank you so much. you seem so knowledgeable! any idea how scarsdale does with kids with an IEP? DS has a very high IQ, just the expressive part of speech is a problem, he needs understanding teachers who would get him involved - he's also very shy. tia! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 09:49 AM Flag
[ - ] Both my husband and I had no music education and the entire extended family is tone deaf. My ds who is 5 yo knows how to carry a tune and we would like to sign him up for music classes. What would you suggest? Is he too young? What is a good instrument for a boy? TIA! 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 07:47 AM Flag
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instruments don't have gender! Does his school have a choir? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 07:50 AM Flag
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He will start K this September, but I don't think it has a choir. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 07:56 AM Flag
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np: choir does not normally start until higher grades anyway. Does dc have interest in any instrument? It will go over best if he actually wants to play. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:03 AM Flag
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I don't think he even knows that many intstruments.... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:14 AM Flag
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our son is in the church choir. Is that a possibility? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:03 AM Flag
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no. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:12 AM Flag
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My son's K (public) had music "special" every week, plus school chorus for those who wanted to join. Maybe wait and see what's offered. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:08 AM Flag
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try the suzuki violin method - great for young kids and for ear training [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 07:53 AM Flag
[ - ] 9 week old dd went 4.5-5 hours between feedings past couple of nights, which we thought was great, given the 3 hour schedule she has been on since she was born. Then she went a full 8 hours last night! should I be doing a happy dance or be concerned? 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Newborn 07.06.08, 07:38 AM Flag
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Do a happy dance while you can....it probably won't last. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 07:40 AM Flag
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ditto. enjoy it and expect it to change. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:01 AM Flag
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HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY DANCE!!! DS is a year and still wakes at 5 every morning for a bottle [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:10 AM Flag
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I have a 9 week old too and she did the 8 hour then all of a sudden back to 4-5 hours. Don't know what happened. It switched as soon as she got her shots. Hoping it will go back to 8 hours again. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:11 AM Flag
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intersting, we are going for her shots this Friday. Wonder if we'll have the same experience? good luck getting your dd back to 8 hrs. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:36 AM Flag
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My 8 week old was giving me at least 1 4 hr stretch at night, and now he is up every 4 hours for a feeding, I am dreaming about a longer stretch, so your post gives me hope [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:39 AM Flag
[ - ] anyone else still waiting for their stimulus check? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 07:30 AM Flag
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not expecting one. would have been nice, though. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 07:32 AM Flag
[ - ] Best place in NYC to get a backpack for a 3 yo? Want to get one for DS for a trip (need it by Tues so online not an option). TIA. 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 07.06.08, 07:27 AM Flag
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No one? I'd love to pick one up today. Had no luck at Target. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 07:44 AM Flag
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no luck at target??? hmmm, try toys r us or a neighborhood discount store. try target again as i saw they were putting out back to school supplies. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:43 AM Flag
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Is there an REI in NYC? They had a nice one for tots that I got for my niece this christmas. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 10:08 AM Flag
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models [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 10:47 AM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 10:51 AM Flag
[ - ] Pls share quit smoking advice or any words of wisdom on the subject. Thanks! 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 07:17 AM Flag
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Meds: Zyban and/or patches [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 07:19 AM Flag
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Thanks! I did not know you can do a patch and zyban at the same time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 07:23 AM Flag
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I think you can, but I may be wrong....I think that's what my friend did when he quit. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 07:25 AM Flag
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Make it the first priority in your life for one to three months (if there is something you feel you can't do without smoking, then don't do it). Use the patch for the same period, stepping down to lower doses each month. I also liked doing a smoking cessation class at the same time just to be able to obsess about it with others. Give friends and co-workers a heads-up and ask for their support. GL - it is possible! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:03 AM Flag
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What support group did you take? Thanks! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:09 AM Flag
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I don't remember - this was in Baltimore years ago, but it might have been put on by the American Lung Association or something. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:12 AM Flag
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I quit cold turkey (2 1/2 packs a day!) with help of twice-weekly accupuncture and reading books on quitting smoking. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:04 AM Flag
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Can you tell me the name of the accupuncture place and the titles of the books? Thanks! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:11 AM Flag
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One book was called Quit For Life. This was 9 years ago, so I don't remember the titles, but just do a search on Smoking Cessation on Amazon, and a ton will come up. I found reading books such a help. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:21 AM Flag
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read Alan Carr's The Easy Way [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 08:10 AM Flag
[ - ] hen you get japanese hair straightening, can you not wash your hair for a couple of days? in that time does it smell like chemicals? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 07.06.08, 07:07 AM Flag
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You need to wait at least 48 hours (I try to wait even longer -- I swear that it helps!). I've never noticed a chemical smell, but my hair is greasy and dirty by the end of the wait -- and it's a pain b/c you can't pull it back then. (I've had it done many times.) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 07:11 AM Flag
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it doesn't really smell. you can lightly spritz your hair, say in the front, to style it and make it look a little less dirty. I don't mind the not washing it but you can't pull it back either, so you can't get away with a ponytail. that part bothers me after the 2nd day because it's flat and you just want to get in there and wash it. it's a great process though - where are you having it done? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 07:23 AM Flag
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np - i'm actually getting it done next friday. i don't know how i'm going to be able to deal with not pulling it back [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 11:43 AM Flag
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you'll be fine. at least you have the weekend and don't have to go to work with flat hair! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 02:56 PM Flag
[ - ] How much do you pay your nanny? for how many hours? overtime? days off? TIA. I have no idea. 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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Newborn 07.06.08, 06:56 AM Flag
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I pay $17/hr for 2 kids. About 20 hours a week. She gets paid for vacation days that fall on her regular work days as well as for days we're on vacation. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 07:13 AM Flag
[ - ] I recently lost 30lbs watching what I eat and exercising 4 -5 x's weekly. A woman I work with said 'you are not fat, you are tall'. How would you take that comment? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 06:46 AM Flag
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That you may weigh "alot" but the weight is proportionate to your height. You look good, essentially. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 06:50 AM Flag
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exactly that..that you aren't fat..and that she may think you are going according to numbers..but many ppl who are tall and weigh (for example) 170 lbs aren't fat..they are tall [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 06:52 AM Flag
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Did she say that before or after you lost the weight? If after, and if she knew your new #, I take it as the other posters. That you are a good weight for your height. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 10:18 AM Flag
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