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Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] Sister needs a break, DH is cheating, dc #2 is having developmental issues and #1 is going through terrible 3s. Need a nice spa that is reasonable 2 hours drive from NYC, anyone have any suggestions? 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 07.06.08, 05:08 PM Flag
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Somehow I don't think a spa is what your sister needs. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:09 PM Flag
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no kidding but can we allow the woman a weekend away please? not like I am handing her a crack pipe [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:11 PM Flag
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I think that it's great that you thought of it. She will at least feel like someone is trying to look out for her. Gestures mean a lot. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:13 PM Flag
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Well, the best thing that could happen is that we go away for the weekend and her dh is hit by a car.... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:15 PM Flag
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^^ but thank you [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:15 PM Flag
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we'll be keeping our fingers crossed about that car thing;) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:16 PM Flag
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:_))))) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:19 PM Flag
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but only if he has really good life insurance and an estate that will go to the sis and kids. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:20 PM Flag
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norwich inn in conn [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:15 PM Flag
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thank you! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 06:03 PM Flag
[ - ] i cheated on my dh and it was with a woman i work with, i'm a wreck over this and i don't know how to tell him 13 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Newborn 07.06.08, 05:03 PM Flag
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there's no good way to tell him. Of course you're a wreck over it, he may leave you because of it. Hopefully, the fact that it was with a woman will be in your favor [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:05 PM Flag
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you don't. how selfish [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:05 PM Flag
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selfish to tell the person you married that you messed up and let them decide what to do? God I hope DH never goes to you for advice. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:07 PM Flag
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back at you [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:08 PM Flag
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you would really rather not know? Wouldn't you be livid if you found out from a third party? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:09 PM Flag
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op - that is exactly my concern, i am so fearful that he will find out [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:10 PM Flag
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If he finds out from someone else, he will feel backed into a corner, and he will also be less likely to believe that you regret it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:11 PM Flag
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but i dont want to lie to him either - i just cant win no matter what i do. i feel that it is selfish to keep something like that from him. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:07 PM Flag
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yes, by all means share. Ruining his life so you can feel better is such a good thing. Let him have to "decide what to do". [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:09 PM Flag
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You ALREADY lied! Now you live with the reprecussions [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:32 PM Flag
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why bother, [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:06 PM Flag
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You'll tell him to relieve yourself. If you love him and don't plan on repeating you'll suffer by yourself. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:07 PM Flag
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1. Are you a lesbian? If not, what the heck were you doing with a woman? If you are, what are you doing with your dh? 2. The ONLY reason to tell your dh is to get the guilt off of your lonely shoulders. It will ruin him forever. He doesn't need to know ANYTHING, unless you decide you're gay and you're opting out of the relationship. You need to sit down and have a little "Come to Jesus" with yourself. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:15 PM Flag
[ - ] Weeks 12-16 of pregnancy are sort of strange: morning sickness is gone, no kicking yet, and no major belly. don't really feel pregnant - just fat. 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Expecting 07.06.08, 05:03 PM Flag
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totally normal [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:07 PM Flag
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13 wks w/ #2 and have the same belly I had at 5 mo w/ #1 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:08 PM Flag
[ - ] Looking at three apartments in Bronxville this week. Pros/cons? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:01 PM Flag
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Hard to live in Bronxville in an apartment. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:05 PM Flag
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Really? Why? We're currently in an apartment in the city and think the extra space would be good. Hard for social reasons? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:06 PM Flag
[ - ] What do you think about the NYT article on the drummers in Harlem and the new condo residents who don't like the noise? Of course, the drummers should have the right to practice, but I think they should stop after 10pm or something. I mean, I don't think anyone likes loud music at midnight (esp'ly if they have db's). 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 07.06.08, 04:58 PM Flag
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They stop at 10. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:59 PM Flag
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So sick of people moving into nabes and then trying to change it. did they not know about the drumming? BS. Just like meatpacking, hells kitchen and flower district. Chinatown will be undone soon and nyc will be one blank slate: no diversity, nothing interesting. Makes me sick. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:08 PM Flag
[ - ] I am totally burnt out with SAH. I've been a full-time mom for 7 years now. The last year or so has been really really a drag. How do you take a sabbatical from this? 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:48 PM Flag
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Get a job! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:49 PM Flag
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not so easy, smart ass. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:50 PM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:52 PM Flag
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honestly it is- it does not have to be in rocket science. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:55 PM Flag
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well, I know that's the answer -- but sorting out the logistics, the childcare, the job hunt, what am I qualified for at this point, etc. is just too much. I can't imagine I could get a job earning what it would cost me to pay someone else to watch my kids. and that depresses me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:57 PM Flag
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yes you can -daycare is great for db's. A basic job will even out, but mentally it is great [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:00 PM Flag
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my kids are past daycare. they're all in preschool or elementary school. I can't see making it work without a nanny. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:01 PM Flag
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After school and summer camp [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:02 PM Flag
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You just need part-time babysitter, or start with part-time job when kids are in school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:04 PM Flag
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I saw a great position- bookkeeping 9-2pm 5 days per week. How could that not be good. Even better if all you need is after-school car. Your attitude is stopping you [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:08 PM Flag
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What did you do before having kids? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:02 PM Flag
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I understand where you're coming from. I've sah for 8 yrs and the idea of figuring out how to get back to working is intimidating. It wouldn't even be hard to find A job - I used to teach. But I know how much work it is during the after school hours and I know how much work my kids are during the afterschool hours. Going back to work would be huge change for everyone. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 06:06 AM Flag
[ - ] wow. i need meds or something, why is it that i am so short-tempered with the kids these days, today, i was downright mean. single parenthood can be hard, but today was the first time i thought, maybe i can't do this. 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:46 PM Flag
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pfft. i'm married sahm and I have days like that too. breathe. look at their baby pictures. everything will be okay. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:46 PM Flag
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op: do yuo ever have days, when your kids fight and you just can't stand it. i actually screamed at them today to get on their beds, i came so close to spanking, and the thing is i know it's just i'm burnedout, not that they are bad kids. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:48 PM Flag
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np- yes. I went back to work part time. 2 adult days per week without them is amazing [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:49 PM Flag
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yes -- there is nothing worse than when they go at it. don't spank -- mostly because it will not help and will make you feel like shit afterwards. how old are your kids? i say, reward chart reward chart reward chart. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:50 PM Flag
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I have days like this and I have one easy dd and am married [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:49 PM Flag
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np: that is so nice of you to post that. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:56 PM Flag
[ - ] trying to decide b/n moving to ft. greene or carroll gardens. we have a 9 mo. sell me! 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:44 PM Flag
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move to queens. what do I care? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:45 PM Flag
[ - ] i feel guilty that i gave up a spot at 166. someone else that ended up at 145, could've gotten 163 or 166 if i hadn't ranked it. i just wish the doe was doing a waitlist so someone who was waiting for a spot could gotten it. instead it'll go to someone who tests over the summer, or they just won't fill the seat. 16 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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NY Schools 07.06.08, 04:33 PM Flag
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Not your fault. Dumb DOE. Why did you give it up? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:35 PM Flag
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msc [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:41 PM Flag
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wrong choice [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 04:15 AM Flag
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OP- i am so happy with my decision. what is your take? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 06:03 AM Flag
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what is msc? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 05:08 AM Flag
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Oh please. DOE overaccepted anticipating this, and the kids that go will be thrilled to have 24 kids in class instead of 28. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:49 PM Flag
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I felt the same way about our spot at NEST for about 5 minutes. Look, one less kid in the class will benefit the 24 or 25 that are there -- don't worry about the 1 kids whose spot you feel you may have taken. It's all a big roulette wheel. Move on. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:52 PM Flag
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Nice. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:46 PM Flag
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If you were trying to the best thing for your kid, then what you did is completely understandable. As someone pointed out, it was all a big crap shoot and someone will get the spot in the end. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 06:09 PM Flag
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I simply do not understand why people would rank a school they would not send their dc to. Why did you do that? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 06:13 PM Flag
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Lots and lots of people apparently did it. I am with you. I just don't get it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 06:16 PM Flag
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didn't know if we'd get a good spot in the D3 lottery. always knew that i would pick a good gen ed over g&t but had no guarantee we would get it. so happy that we got msc. would've gone to 166 if we hadn't. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 06:27 PM Flag
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It is called having options. In the end you don't know for sure what you are going to get for your child, especially if you are zoned for a not so great school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 06:10 AM Flag
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D3 is one of the places where people do have choices to rank. The doe only guaranteed a seat if ALL choices were ranked; I'm confused why this seems unclear. The doe set-up an accomplice structure in the big shutout by the doe [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 06:22 AM Flag
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and in most cases, guilt is a non-productive replacement for responsibility one should have or could have assumed; you could not have. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 06:30 AM Flag
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The DoE is fully aware that D3 parents will largely participate in the desirable lottery system; it was their intent to have seats to fill over the Summer- and NOT by the families who battled all the evils of the first round- any of those SO'd have taken off the gloves; DoE doesn't want repeat complainants. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 06:33 AM Flag
[ - ] Can't. take. whining and crying. any. more. seriously 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:27 PM Flag
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drink.more.wine. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:28 PM Flag
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you. are. me! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:41 PM Flag
[ - ] Nicest area in Roslyn? 0 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:20 PM Flag
[ - ] So bummed about my nuchal results. I know there's nothing to do till my amnio in 3 weeks, but hate that I am now stressed when I wasn't before. 33 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:18 PM Flag
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then why did you agree to the test? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:24 PM Flag
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NP: Um, duh? No one expects a bad result. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:24 PM Flag
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then why bother taking it? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:36 PM Flag
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Because you hope that you'll get peace of mind from a good result. Again, duh. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:37 PM Flag
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op: thanks for backing me up [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:40 PM Flag
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well, duh, it seems smarter to assume nothing is wrong than to take the damn test. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:42 PM Flag
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seems if the test can do nothing but make you stressed, then logically there's no reason to take it, especially if you are an amnio candidate anyway [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:46 PM Flag
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I assumed it would be peace of mind, and based on the results, may not have done amnio. but that's all irrelevant anyway [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:48 PM Flag
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weird you would assume peace of mind when you've already had a false poz in the past. I think all these tests during pregnancy are ridiculous. Just carry baby to term -- forget the amnio, the nuchal, whatever. Just love your baby. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:53 PM Flag
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you're beating me up for assuming the best going in? My nuchal was fine w/ dd, it was a later test, and I would not be a good parent to a ds baby. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:55 PM Flag
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ignore this troll. Everyone gets the nuchal. And your reaction is totally normal. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:56 PM Flag
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Thanks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:01 PM Flag
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if you are assuming one thing or another going into the test then of course you will be disappointed. And I'm sorry you don't think a special needs baby is fashionable enough. Good luck! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:58 PM Flag
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TOTALLY unfashionable. Now if special needs was in, that would be a different story. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:59 PM Flag
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i've heard special needs is coming back in 2010. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:02 PM Flag
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If only I'd waited [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:03 PM Flag
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Are you holier than thou? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 07:30 PM Flag
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will you abort if amnio results aren't what you want? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:24 PM Flag
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yes [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:38 PM Flag
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do you have other children? how far along are you? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:43 PM Flag
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I have a dd (and had a false poz w/ my 16 wk quad screen w/ her), I'm just over 13 wks [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:45 PM Flag
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I'm so sorry. How bad were the results? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:27 PM Flag
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1/89. I know, not horrible, but not what I wanted to hear [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:39 PM Flag
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that sucks, I know it's not horrible, but it's not that low either. I'm sure that your amnio will come back fine, and you'll feel a lot better. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:50 PM Flag
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I did a quad screen when pg even though I was planning the amnio, I did it bc I was over 35 and was invited to participate in a study. I never received the results but mine were very similar to yours. My OB got the results and they were sweating out the amnio result, which was normal. My ds is seven now and totally healthy. Good luck, odds are still very, very much in your favor. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 06:53 PM Flag
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How bad? The ladies on this board have experience with numbers. High for downs or other things? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:34 PM Flag
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Just downs, trisomy 18 came back 1/290 (and am 36, so better than just on age alone) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:42 PM Flag
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that is why I only did amnio. I needed certaincy which nuchal does not provide (numbers mean nothing- had a friend with great nuchal, who had a down's baby) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:51 PM Flag
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in hindsight, I wish this is what I did, but....alas. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:55 PM Flag
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Hiya. My results for Downs were 1/5. My perfectly healthy ds will turn one this week. Hang in there! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:55 PM Flag
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thanks so much for this. That must have been a horrible time for you. Can I ask how old you are? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:56 PM Flag
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I was 36, almost 37, when I had db. I know it's hard, but remember the odds are in your favor. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 04:57 PM Flag
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Yes, thanks [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.06.08, 05:00 PM Flag
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