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Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] name poll - paloma or delilah? need an "m" middle name too, please 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:13 AM Flag
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Paloma Monique [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:16 AM Flag
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HOOKER! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:20 AM Flag
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margaret, melanie, miriam (i like delilah miriam - both biblical), michelle, meital (hebrew, pronounced may-TAL) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:30 AM Flag
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prefer paloma. melissa, marissa, melanie, melody, maribel, marisol, marie, marian, mariel [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:38 AM Flag
[ - ] If you were not going to be commuting to NYC, would you rather live in Princeton or Rumson, NJ (these are your only options) and why?? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:13 AM Flag
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rumson. i live 15 from rumson, dh commutes everyday [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:14 AM Flag
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rumson is sooo beautiful by the way [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:18 AM Flag
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but do you have an opinion on princeton? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:17 AM Flag
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im very central costal jersey. princeton is very west, pretty but its not rumson. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:19 AM Flag
[ - ] Our relatively new sitter was supposed to babysit Saturday night. She never showed or called. Sunday morning, she tells me her son had a terrible ear infection and she took him to the ER Saturday at 1pm. We were expecting her at 6pm. I believe her, but what doesn't sit right with me is that she never called. I would never forget to call an employer under those circumstances. Are my standards too high? or is it a little fishy that she didn't call until the next day? 16 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Toddler 07.21.08, 10:09 AM Flag
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Very fishy! Find a new sitter! I could ALMOST see her excuse if her child was having emergency surgery or something worse, but he had an ear infection - non life threatening! Don't call her anymore! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:11 AM Flag
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it's a little fishy. She could have called before she left, while she sat around waiting, etc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:11 AM Flag
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She should have called--very flakey [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:11 AM Flag
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I would be really skeptical of her. First, she might be lying about her son. Second, even if she's not lying, she should have called. Really irresponsible. I would find someone new ASAP. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:13 AM Flag
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^^^ oh, and third, if she has a young son, chances are these emergencies will pop up from time to time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:14 AM Flag
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and as a mom, I can handle that, but what I can't handle is the not calling. She is my fulltime sitter! She's been here a mont and my kids really like her. I would like to give her another chance...but maybe I need to cut my losses. PS--My mom told me "you'll never have a sitter last because you just ask too much!" thanks for the support, mom! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:16 AM Flag
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is this her first offense? Is she wonderful otherwise? I might give her another chance then. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:30 AM Flag
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It is a little fishy, but as someone who also spent the weekend in the ER I know that place is a time suck, and she was probably very scared about her child and just forgot to call. She may not have had your # or any other of a number of reasons. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:16 AM Flag
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the thing is, when she's here, she is glued to her cell phone. and thats why I don't believe she couldn't call (or have her dh call, or one of her older kids, etc.) I told her that if she didn't want to sit or couldn't sit, I totally understood and that she should just let me know. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:18 AM Flag
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if she is glued to her cell phone (btw, you're not allowed to use those things in the ER) why is she your babysitter? I wouldn't hire someone who was always on the phone [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:18 AM Flag
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she's not always on it, but she has it on her A LOT. her kids call and I understand, and I don't think it gets in the way of her taking care of my kids. I know you can't use your phone in the ER, but you can go outside for a minute to call or you can look up a number and use the payphone to call. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:21 AM Flag
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Yes, you can, but if she was the only one with her son she might not have wanted to leave him alone in the ER. I'm not trying to defend her, but I just spent the weekend in the ER and I know what an unfriendly place it is [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:22 AM Flag
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I've been there too, but I'm sure she spoke to some member of her family that day and she could have asked one of them to call me. I have met her sister (who nannies for a family I know) and she has teen age kids as well. Any of them could have called me just to say she wouldn't be coming. 10 seconds. I wouldn't have questioned it. But it would have been nice not to rush home from the pool and try and get the kids ready for her, etc. Just wanted some more opinions. What if it had been a word day? I would've been really screwed. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:24 AM Flag
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I totally understand, but do also remember that spending hours in the ER can make you forget things. I had to go there last Friday at 10am, the minute I got into work, and was there until 4am on Sat morning - and during that time I completely forgot that I was supposed to meet a colleague for lunch and that I had a presentation that afternoon. It happens. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:26 AM Flag
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this does not prevent one from calling although it might have caused her to forget that she had a job that night and she may not have wanted to say that. it's not totally responsible, but otoh, I could relate. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:39 AM Flag
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find a new sitter. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:44 AM Flag
[ - ] anyone have a dc that is better behaved at home than at school. seems werid. 14 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:00 AM Flag
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what happens at home when he misbehaves? what is he doing at school that's different? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:02 AM Flag
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OP- a home I put either take toys away or put him in his room. ususally threats work and he listens- only really have problems when he is over tired. at school he doesn't listen to the teacher at all and is starting to have socail problems to (he is 2.8) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:04 AM Flag
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perhaps he's too young for preschool. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:07 AM Flag
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I thought of that. I'm going to try it again with a different teacher see if maybe that was the problem. If he struggels I'll keep him home till he is 4 and hope he matures [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:09 AM Flag
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Non-expert advice from my mom, who raised 5 kids -- in general, if kids are good away but not at home it's okay, if they are good at home and behave badly elsewhere, it's something you need to address. In your case, might just be a too young dc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:13 AM Flag
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what could cause him to behave badly elsewhere. he took an artclass for 2 hrs without me and did fine. he likes to be with me most. i wish i could understand him [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:22 AM Flag
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hmmm [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:35 AM Flag
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address how? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:39 AM Flag
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that is something dd's K teacher told me. He was describing what a well-behaved kid she was, and I was like "are we talking about the same kid?" [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:56 AM Flag
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the public angel private devil? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:58 AM Flag
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pretty much [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 11:03 AM Flag
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sounds like too young, may be missing mommy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:39 AM Flag
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I was planning to go back to work part-time in Sept. I also what him to socialize hope this new teacher will be able to reach him. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:42 AM Flag
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keep finger crossed [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:53 AM Flag
[ - ] I'm looking to move out to CT somewhere between Stamford and Norwalk on the New Haven line. In doing our budgeting need to account for Childcare for a soon to be born infant. What are we looking at for spending at a day care center vs. a nanny out in that region. Any help would be great, just looking for ball park numbers. 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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Expecting 07.21.08, 10:00 AM Flag
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I would phone a couple of Bright Horizons and ask them what their prices are AND maybe get on the lists in a couple of towns. I also noticed a Y with a daycare in Westport. There could definitely be cheaper options though, but I live in the city. Even less familiar with the nanny situation there, sorry! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 11:28 AM Flag
[ - ] DH booked luxury vacation, we never had a honeymoon, for right after db is born. We were able to postone until three months after db is born but can we even bring db? Anyone done this? TIA 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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TTC 07.21.08, 10:00 AM Flag
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need more info. where, for example [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:01 AM Flag
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Europe, two weeks. Wine tours, upscale hotels etc. I checked and all the place have babysitting services etc. but it that dangerous? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:02 AM Flag
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depends on what kind of newborn db is. we brought our little one everwhere with us but you're going to be very tired. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:06 AM Flag
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where in Europe? I would be a little hesitant putting a newborn into a hotel babysitting service. Just bring the baby along. They are so easy at that age. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:34 AM Flag
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it will be fine, we traveled all over Europe with our kids even at 6 wks. They will either sleep with you, or if you have a good hotel you can leave them with the babysitters for a few hours [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:35 AM Flag
[ - ] my 5mo DD is asleep in her crib on her belly... Is that bad? She's not going to die or anything, right? I put her in there for a few minutes while I went to answer the door (she's pre-crawling, so she likes being up on her elbows a lot) and when I came back, she had fallen asleep. How long is SIDS a risk? I don't want to wake her up and make a big production of flipping her over, cause she'll never stay unless she's swaddled, and I want her to nap... This is fine, right? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:54 AM Flag
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i put my ds on belly from 3 months on he is 2.5 now he lived [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:56 AM Flag
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we started tummy sleeping our ds at 4 mo, for naps and at night. he slept so much better and seemed calmer all around. we all survived sleeping the same way. make sure it's a hard surface, no blankets, etc, she'll be fine [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:58 AM Flag
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she'll be fine [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:15 AM Flag
[ - ] How many people get books from the library for their kids? 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:48 AM Flag
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me [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:49 AM Flag
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me, books, movies and also attend programs at library [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:52 AM Flag
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Ditto. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:53 AM Flag
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tritto [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:54 AM Flag
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here, too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:56 AM Flag
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me, get about 15 every 3 weeks [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:03 AM Flag
[ - ] Ds went to dr's today and he has hand mouth and foot disease. Dr said to keep him away from other children until fever is gone. Anyone have this? How long did you keep away from children? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:47 AM Flag
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dds and i all had it. fever (very high) only lasted about 36 hours in all of us but other symptoms (painful sore throat, etc.) lingered. apparently the whole thing can last 7-10 days. if doc said its ok once the fever is gone, i'd just do that. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:57 AM Flag
[ - ] What can I do for the appearance of crepey skin? Anything? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:46 AM Flag
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What does this mean? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:46 AM Flag
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longer sleeves. sorry, thats what i'm doing [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:55 AM Flag
[ - ] What do you think of really wealthy people registering for their weddings? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:43 AM Flag
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cheesy! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:45 AM Flag
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i don't [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:46 AM Flag
[ - ] I am amazed that parents out there with kids who did well on the OLSAT/BRS actually beleiev their child is "gifted." 40 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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NY Schools 07.21.08, 09:41 AM Flag
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My dc did well on the OLSAT as well as the SB and ERB. I know he is gifted. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:47 AM Flag
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because of how they scored? lady, you need to invest time in another aspect of your ego, leave your dc alone [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:56 AM Flag
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HAHHHAHAHAHAHA [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:57 AM Flag
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np: So are you saying a kid who scored 99x3 on ERB, and 99 on SB and OLSAT is just average? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:09 AM Flag
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I think there is a level or two between 'average' and 'gifted'. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:19 AM Flag
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Poster from below, we all scored 99x3 once upon a time ago. There are many more intelligent, naturally more intelligent people than myself out there. I think it means we are very smart, but not gifted [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:38 AM Flag
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It is the third week in July. You need to find a new hobby. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:48 AM Flag
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don't we all. -np [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:51 AM Flag
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I know. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:58 AM Flag
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Most of us who let their kids take the OLSAT also had the kids tested on the SB and/or ERB. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:11 AM Flag
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And? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:12 AM Flag
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Just in case OP is trying to point out that the OLSAT cannot identify gifted children. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:13 AM Flag
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The only thing that can identify truly gifted children is an IQ test administered in a psych office on a scale up to 180 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:17 AM Flag
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the SB is one of those tests [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:19 AM Flag
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No, it is not. Plenty of 99s on SB are just smart not gifted [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:25 AM Flag
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Of course they're gifted. Gifted is a defined term for a child with an IQ above 130. That's what gifted means. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:27 AM Flag
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God, then my entire family is gifted, my parents, sister etc. Please. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:34 AM Flag
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The SB is quite reliable and a child scoring a 99+ on there is indeed gifted. By definition. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:31 AM Flag
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Do you really think your dc is gifted because they scored 99x3 or 99 on the SB? All my siblings, my dh, myself, and our dcs scores 99x3. Do I think they are smart, sure, are we gifted? I wouldn't say so, no. It used to be that gifted was above 145 what changed? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:37 AM Flag
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No, it has always been 130 for moderately gifted. PG is over 145 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:39 AM Flag
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No pg is over 175. I have a PG dc. Highly gifted is over 145, up to 145 is moderately gifted. Sorry. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:40 AM Flag
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175 in which IQ test may I ask? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 01:21 PM Flag
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what IQ range is the 99th percentile on the SB equivalent to? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:40 AM Flag
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not 145 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:40 AM Flag
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well, 145 is somewhere in the range also. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:42 AM Flag
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somewhere in what range? of your 99 score? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:50 AM Flag
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a 99 percentile embraces 99.0-99.999999 (whatever the highest percentile is). And of course that includes the 145+ IQ range. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 11:16 AM Flag
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but your dcs 99 and your friends dcs 99 score could mean one is a smart dc and the other is a genius they are not both gifted [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 11:23 AM Flag
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Gifted STARTS at 95. 99 is most assuredly gifted. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 12:52 PM Flag
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absurdly gifted? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 12:59 PM Flag
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First of all, the scoring has changed since we were young - higher scores from the past are now equivalent to lower scores today. Second, you seem to be missing the point that "gifted" is a defined term for people who score at a certain level on IQ tests. It's a defined term, period. It doesn't mean genius. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:40 AM Flag
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Oh the scoring has changed. Well we also know our IQ as the schools openly tested them. the 99s mean there is potential that the dc is gifted it is called going off the charts you would need to administered a scaled IQ test up to 180 in order to find out if your dc is actually gifted or just bright with that 99. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:42 AM Flag
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With the Stanford Binet, "gifted" starts with a score of 96. Again, it's a defined term. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:44 AM Flag
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and that 96 translates into what IQ [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:49 AM Flag
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I'm amazed that you care about what other people think about their own DCs. It is frankly none of your business (even if they are wrong). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 11:38 AM Flag
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Awww. So sensitive [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 11:58 AM Flag
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If they are given the opportunity not to vegetate in gen ed then by scoring well on the olsat/brs they are gifted. Not everyone has TT priv school option. The gift is that they supposedly won't be ignored by teachers who are just trying to get kids through the "See John Run" Book [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 08:50 PM Flag
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My dc took the OLSAT, got 99 and got first choice school. Whether she is gifted or not is not something I think about. All I wanted from this process was a great school, we were lucky enough to get that. I never thought about the OLSAT as anything more than a hoop to jump through to try for a great school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.22.08, 03:38 AM Flag
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FYI, I'm a psychologist in training and the SB is outdated and generally not credible. Woodcock Johnson and WAIS are more commonly used now. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.22.08, 04:39 AM Flag
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My child tested as gifted in a special ed evaluation and as average in the school administered gifted test, because that day she was cranky, sleepy, had never been to that school before, was only 5 years old, and didn't want to be separated from me. I consider these tests rather unfair, to say the least. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.22.08, 08:31 AM Flag
[ - ] what's the usual rate for a regular pt babysitter for 1 one year old in ny? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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Toddler 07.21.08, 09:40 AM Flag
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I would say $15/hour. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:23 AM Flag
[ - ] Remind me to never nag dh again.Or at least lay off of him for a couple of months. We spent the weekend w/ 2 other couples at their beach house. Neither of my friend's dhs did jack sh*t with the kids the whole time. I mean they played w/ them, but no diapers, no feeding, no calming of tantrums, no putting to bed. Nothing. My dh has his flaws for sure, but he is 2000% involved with parenting, and does his share and more. I am shocked at how little these guys did, and how my friends think it's normal! 18 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Expecting 07.21.08, 09:40 AM Flag
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my dh is the same. we both lucked out, TRUST ME [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:40 AM Flag
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ditto here. But he is still lacking in other department, though. It's hard not to nag him. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:04 AM Flag
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I feel so fortunate. My dh is a totally involved dad--everything from diapers, to making dinners and playing with kids. I don't think I could tolerate anything less. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:42 AM Flag
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that's what astounded me, my girlfriends did nothing and said nothing. my friend's dh handed her the baby and said, "uh oh, he's got a poop!" grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:51 AM Flag
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I would kill him. I think it's all about expectations. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:52 AM Flag
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ITA - My mother is shocked at my dh b/c she is used to my sister's dh. Sister's dh wasn't involved in the baby stages of his kids AT ALL and didn't seem to care. My mom couldn't believe I didn't want to register for things like strollers, car seats etc. w/o dh b/c he has opinions on them. I'm SO thankful my dh feeds that baby, changes diapers etc. My sister's dh didn't get involved at all until his kids were toddlers and even now the "gross" stuff (sickness, accidents, dr. appts) are solely my sister's duties. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:44 AM Flag
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My BIL is the same way. He is so committed to his career I wonder if he knows he has a wife and dc's at home. My dh is an amazing dad and I swear my dd loves her dad more then me. :( oh well. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:49 AM Flag
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my mil always says " I don't know how you get him to change diapers!" um, I don't "get" him to, he just does. We both work 50+ hours a week, lady--- it's called co-parenting! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:52 AM Flag
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Exactly. I don't have to nag my dh to take care of the kids. He just sees it as his responsibility, just like helping with dishes, folding laundry, etc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:54 AM Flag
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me, too. thank goodness. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:59 AM Flag
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eh, my dh is a total lout when it comes to housework, but he does change tons of diapers and takes db on a long early am walk on the weekends so I can sleep in. It evens out in the end! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:01 AM Flag
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my dh is good with the dcs but can't handle changing bms he gags like nothing else. I do it because it's annoying to watch. my sons prefer me to do everything but tolerate daddy it sometimes hurts dh's feelings when they say no I want mommy [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:58 AM Flag
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Sadly, my dh is like your friend's dh. it's a battle... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:58 AM Flag
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how old are dbs? why won't he step up to the plate/ [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:01 AM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:05 AM Flag
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ita. you need a momcation. one night in a hotel. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:08 AM Flag
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let him prepare the bottles, too! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:23 AM Flag
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my dh is the same... he's very involved, which is great for me, him and the kids. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.22.08, 07:05 AM Flag
[ - ] anyone told the sex of their baby before the 20 week sono around 12-15 weeks. was it right? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:37 AM Flag
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We found out earlier because of the amnio. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 09:39 AM Flag
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Are you the poster that got 95% boy? There are always stories of people who were told the wrong gender early, but I think it is 95% likely you are having a boy. Also, I think it's more likely for gender to be wrong when told it's a girl because penis isn't evident, but does it really matter to you? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:00 AM Flag
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I did CVS at 11 weeks, find out then [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.21.08, 10:00 AM Flag
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