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Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] I can use flour to thicken something if I don't have cornstarch, can't I? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:40 PM Flag
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yeah but cook it in butter first. (If the thing you are adding to is not hot enough to cook the flour.) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:41 PM Flag
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So add it when it is hot? Thanks [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:44 PM Flag
[ - ] Bitch post: What annoys you? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 06.16.08, 01:40 PM Flag
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bitchy nasty judgemental ppl annoy me [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:41 PM Flag
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Ok, I will start. I love DH but he is spoiled and expects me or his parents to pick up the tab for everything. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:42 PM Flag
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snobs annoy me [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:45 PM Flag
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Just about everything [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:46 PM Flag
[ - ] Same sex twins, one got in to the TAG program for K, the other, by a few points, did not. What to do? Send them to a school w/o a TAG program? Send them to local school with TAG and let one by labeled as the "smart" one? Don't want one to miss out, but don't want the other to be labeled and feel like crap. They are competitive as it is. 20 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:40 PM Flag
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ouch that's hard. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:42 PM Flag
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Can you see a difference bt the two? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:43 PM Flag
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Send one to tag and test the other one for first grade. If child doesn't get in, then decide. Tell this this year that you want to try letting them have their own schools and own friends. If you decide to change it next year, you just say, I wanted you both to be in the same school. They are too young to know "smart" for K. but you will have to deal by first. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:45 PM Flag
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good answer ! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 02:26 PM Flag
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That's my issue: I'd go nuts having to bring them to separate schools (I work outside the home) now. I'm worried that there won't be spots in 1st grade at our school of choice that's not TAG...i.e., it's oversubscribed and much easier to get in now than in 1st grade. In fact, they're in now--I'm just having second thoughts about *not* sending the "gifted" one to the TAG program. And yes, I see differences, but not in terms of how intelligent they each are. They are just different kinds of learners. Both are perfectly bright. I put "gifted" in quotes because I think of gifted as a kid who plays the violin or reads while still in diapers. Mine are smart kids, but not gifted like that. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 02:13 PM Flag
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Is there a sibling policy for twins? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 02:21 PM Flag
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Yes, for the school but not for TAG. I.e., lower scorer is guaranteed a spot at the same school as higher scorer, but not in the same class. Everyone over grade 1 knows which class is which. And I thought waiting for replies was the hard part. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 02:23 PM Flag
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I see what you mean. That is tough. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 02:24 PM Flag
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Thanks for listening, anyway, and for your thoughtful reply. Will probably send them to the non-TAG school and retest next year and see how we feel about it all then. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 02:31 PM Flag
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I have twins, and would not send one to G&T and the other to gen ed. feel it would be negative FOR ME psychologically. later for them as well. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 03:07 PM Flag
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I think you're right...that's what I'm leaning toward, sending them both to a gen ed school, which people seem to like. It's hard because you can't tell them wholesale that the test means "nothing" because that's not entirely true and I don't want to belittle one's achievement. It just doesn't mean everything. They were 4 when they took it! But I don't think they'll get that now. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 04:36 PM Flag
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I think I would send them both to gen ed. When it really comes down to it, I have a hard time believing that the G&T programs (especially the district ones, which are only enriched) are that much better or stronger. Why draw a distinction between the two now? I'm all for parenting each child differently when the need arises, but there doesn't seem to be such a compelling need in this case (perhaps if there was a huge score gap between the two). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 02:28 PM Flag
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Thanks. You know, there's so much frenzy about who got the 99 and the 97 that it's hard not to get caught up in it. I swore I wouldn't but I also swore I wouldn't feel bad about not being able to nurse both of them exclusively, and of course I did. Clearly this is my issue... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 02:35 PM Flag
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Which schools? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 02:53 PM Flag
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I'd rather not say. It's a district G&T program and a progressive school. The scores for the schools are pretty much the same and they were rated the same in that survey last year. They both have outside partnerships. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 04:38 PM Flag
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I would send the one to G&T, with the hopes of the other testing in the following year (or even if not). I would explain to them that they are both smart, but one had a better testing day than the other, or that the test measure only a narrow band of intelligence. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 02:54 PM Flag
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and maybe the dumber one will be dumb enough to believe it! Please, don't delude yourself! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 03:08 PM Flag
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I appreciate that explanation but I fear my 5-year-olds will not. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 04:33 PM Flag
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what's best for the kids? you're saying that they are different, you will be regretting later not putting the smart kid into gifted program. plus again you have an option to retest again next year [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 03:17 PM Flag
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Honestly, I think they'd both do well in whichever school I send them to for next year. I guess we can reevaluate then. I just hate all this. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 04:41 PM Flag
[ - ] Any PS9 or 199 parents of older kids on? Have you heard anything about how the kids did in MS admissions this year? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:39 PM Flag
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Friend's DS is going to Delta from PS9, along with a bunch of his friends, no other details beyond that. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:58 PM Flag
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Stilling trying to make a choice? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.17.08, 08:27 AM Flag
[ - ] Any moms of 1st graders out there? Are yours still getting homework? Only one more full day of school left tomorrow, and my son came home with 3 worksheets today?! 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:38 PM Flag
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nope, no more homework thankfully [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:43 PM Flag
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I am not thrilled with this new school. Everything they do is torn out of a workbook. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:50 PM Flag
[ - ] What kind of math do they teach at PS 116 - Terc or Chicago? 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 06.16.08, 01:38 PM Flag
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ALl D2 is Terc [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:39 PM Flag
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It's a D2 school. That means TERC (most likely supplemented, though) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:40 PM Flag
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really? i heard somebody who is at ps 41 was saying that 41 is better than 116 because 41 uses terc, and 116 - chicago. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:42 PM Flag
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D2 means TERC. How much the schools supplement with other approaches is a different story. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:45 PM Flag
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nope, all d2 use Terc, but last year they changed and also suppliment now (some did before that) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:46 PM Flag
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Is Chicago Math "Everyday Mathematics"? If that's the case both schools are bad. Maybe TERC is a little better but not much. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:46 PM Flag
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41 moms are a trip [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:46 PM Flag
[ - ] PS 11 - Do they have piano classes at K? Also, what are the highlights of their G&T program? thanks 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 06.16.08, 01:37 PM Flag
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Try speaking with the parent coordinator, Stephen McGill. smcgill3@schools.nyc.gov. When we were looking at PS11, we found him really helpful. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:43 PM Flag
[ - ] ARGHHH!!! Tiger won.... 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:32 PM Flag
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little blond made a smart move hooking him [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:42 PM Flag
[ - ] Is OSEPO taking the day off today? I haven't been able to get a soul on the phone all day. 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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NY Schools 06.16.08, 01:29 PM Flag
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Call G&T dept instead - more responsive [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:35 PM Flag
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Thx, but not a G & T question. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 02:17 PM Flag
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OSEPO is busy fielding calls re: G&T Kindergarten [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 02:19 PM Flag
[ - ] i have a new pet peeve. when you see someone and they lost a lot of weight and you compliment them and they say something like "oh, i just started being very careful about portion sizes" and then you find out six weeks later that she actually had her stomach stapled. 17 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:28 PM Flag
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Why do people lie about this? What does it matter HOW they lose the weight? God damn them, the lost it!!! Lucky sods. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:29 PM Flag
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But that's what having your stomach stapled does..forces you to be careful about portion sizes. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:30 PM Flag
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yes, and as i typed it i realized that it was technically true. but come on. (i also realize that she's under no obligation to share her medical history with me. but again: come on.) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:33 PM Flag
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np: ITTA...yes they have to eat smaller portions BUT they are losing the weight fast because of surgery not because of portion control. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:43 PM Flag
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exactly. it's not a question of control and the "portion size" comment implies that it is self control. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:46 PM Flag
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self control comes AFTER [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:48 PM Flag
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^^^the surgery. Sure they needed help to start but they shouldn't be embarrassed of that [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:48 PM Flag
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And you want them to admit they have none. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:51 PM Flag
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c'mon... that is a lie as bad as any other. "I just started being careful about..." is not the same as, "they cut me open and sewed/stapled/banded my stomach so I couldn't eat too much." [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:35 PM Flag
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STAR JONES Syndrome [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:43 PM Flag
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what are they supposed to say? "I had absolutely no will power or control and would stuff my face, so they shrank my stomach for me"? - You want penance from them even in casual conversation? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:44 PM Flag
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np: no they should say THANK YOU and that's it. They don't have to lie about it [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:45 PM Flag
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I think there must be some defensiveness. Come on, people, give them a break. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:46 PM Flag
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np: I'm a big woman and if I would ever have my stomach stapled..I wouldn't hide it. Why be defensive? You had help getting the weightloss started and that's ok. You still need to practice portion control to keep it off [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:47 PM Flag
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And that's what they said. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:49 PM Flag
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the fact that you care is weird. get a life. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:49 PM Flag
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does this come up often in your social circle? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:51 PM Flag
[ - ] Anyone still not know where their K dc is going next Fall? 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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NY Schools 06.16.08, 01:26 PM Flag
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families with 5 year olds in the PS 151 zone who are not doing private or G&T. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:46 PM Flag
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Why too many kids for the school? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 02:17 PM Flag
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school closed down years ago. Families must apply for extra spaces in four nearby publics. "Extra" is tricky word though as all 4 options are operating at more than 100% capacity. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 07:04 PM Flag
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yup. waiting for both the results of the 41/3 lottery and our g&t placement letter. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 02:32 PM Flag
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we don't know. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 07:07 PM Flag
[ - ] I had a m/c on Friday and I just can't focus on work today. The tears heve stopped, but I'm so down. How long will this last? 15 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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TTC 06.16.08, 01:26 PM Flag
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Three or four weeks. It gets easier then, and hopefully you will be pregnant again soon. Sorry for your loss. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:28 PM Flag
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I am so sorry for your loss. Give yourself some time to grieve. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:28 PM Flag
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i cried on and off for about three weeks. i still can't talk about it and am having an emotionally difficult time but at least i don't think about it nonstop anymore. (it's been about six weeks for me). Best of luck. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:30 PM Flag
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thanks [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:41 PM Flag
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How far along were you? Do you have any dc's? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:35 PM Flag
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7 weeks, I have a 4.5 year old. Not my first m/c, but it took a long time to get preg this time and I feel like I'm getting older and the age gap keeps growing. Too scared to keep trying and feel this down again. It seems unfair to the wonderful ds that I'm blessed to have to have a sad mommy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:40 PM Flag
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give yourself some time before you make any decisions. I felt this way as well but then a year later (with a 5 yr gap) decided to give it one last try--so glad I did. You have one dc so your odds are much better. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:46 PM Flag
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same just happened to me a few weeks ago. honestly the first few days were the worst and then i felt better. sorry this happened. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:37 PM Flag
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anyway you could take the day off tomorrow? could you and your other child just go to the zoo or something? i think a day off of work is totally warranted in this case. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:45 PM Flag
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Great idea. But I'm waiting for it to pass naturally and it hasn't yet. If not, I'll need to take a day for the d&c. Maybe I'll just take 2 days. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:52 PM Flag
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you have my support (and prob the support of every woman in the world who has been pregnant) on taking two days. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:54 PM Flag
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poor thing! if at all possible, take the time off. I had to work through mine and it was really awful. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 03:34 PM Flag
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I'm so sorry for your loss. You are forever changed, but time will help stop the tears. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:47 PM Flag
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i'm so sorry for your loss. it took me a while to get back to "normal." just remember that you experienced a loss and you're allowed to grieve. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 03:26 PM Flag
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so sorry. go ahead and be down about it. also helps to talk about it w/someone who's been through it. it's really hard and all the sympathy in the world is not the same as talking it out w/someone who's btdt. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 03:29 PM Flag
[ - ] Thoughts on Neighborhood School? 0 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Preschool/Kids 06.16.08, 01:20 PM Flag
[ - ] Any current LL parent on? Is it true that the fundraising there is aggressive? Insideschools reports that you are more or less required to donate $900 per child per year. 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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NY Schools 06.16.08, 01:18 PM Flag
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that's what we were told on our tour last year. ps116 wasn't any different. that's how the good schools fund the assistant teachers. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:27 PM Flag
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I went to 116 K orientation last week and we were asked by the PTA (in a flyer) to donate $700 per child. They know not every family can contribute that, but some can contribute more. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:42 PM Flag
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you're not required to do anything. It's a public school! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:51 PM Flag
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of course. but the PTA can still be very aggressive and be on your heels to get as much money as possible out of you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:54 PM Flag
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ah, I haven't encountered any PTA yet. But I'd be happy to donate as much as I can and think that everybody who can should. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:56 PM Flag
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In fairness, don't make those PTA folks out to be assholes here. They are working really hard to raise the tide for everyone's kids. (Not an LL or PTA person by the way.) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 01:58 PM Flag
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i think pta is the most thankless job. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 02:00 PM Flag
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I work with professional fundraisers. Everyone thinks spending the money is noble but raising it is crass. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 02:02 PM Flag
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We are not rich but can afford the $900 so will donate if asked. I would hope that those who are not as fortunate will not be pressured. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 02:04 PM Flag
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Years ago the word was that the suggested donation at 199 was $2000 per child. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 02:09 PM Flag
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It's true and then there is fundraising all throughout the year. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 02:15 PM Flag
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Yes, that's what they ask for once a year, but there's also the auction, gift wrap etc. Some people don't give at all, others give a ton. We give what we can (not anywhere near $900). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 02:28 PM Flag
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