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Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] How does the bus service work? Our dc is going to a private sn school in the fall, starting summer camp for a few weeks. We don't have our CSE finished since they are recommending a different placement. Are there private companies we can call? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Special Needs 06.22.08, 06:46 AM Flag
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Does your school have a contact person on the staff who is in charge of busing? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:52 AM Flag
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is it a funded school? Once everything is signed off on the OPT (office of pupil transportation) will contact you. Usually it's pretty close to when school begins--sometime in august. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:10 PM Flag
[ - ] Hunter w/l mom here: I just emailed them to check on the status of the w/l. I have a dd on the list. They will tell me her status, but probably not the boys. I will report back when I hear. I know there have been a lot of threads about the w/l lately. 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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NY Schools 06.22.08, 06:46 AM Flag
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Best of luck to you! I really hope your dd get in. If she doesn't though, what's your plan? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:49 AM Flag
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op: Thank you! DD is going to a very good G&T that we are very lucky and happy about. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:43 AM Flag
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Is it Anderson? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:47 AM Flag
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op: I will say it is Anderson, NEST+m or PS 9 G&T. I really think it wold "out me" if I told which one. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:08 AM Flag
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Not trying to out you, but I understand. We're going to A and very excited. I hope you get the outcome you want, and if you don't, your dc will get a great education at any of those you listed. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:16 AM Flag
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op: Thank you. Congrats on Anderson and best of luck! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:09 PM Flag
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you really sound so desperate. calm down. it will all be OK. you need to let go, and see if it works out in the future. meanwhile, embrace the spot you have. if you would out yourself by saying where you are going, my guess is that you are talking way too much with the people you know about this (or those you will know at the school where you are headed). Please keep your desperation to yourself, or you will be seen as a freak, and rightfully so. we all have disappointments and desires for our dcs. you may vent them here. but beware. acting this way IRL is very problematic. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 09:05 AM Flag
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Not OP, but I think you're really reading too much into her post! You're the one who sounds like a drama queen. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 09:33 AM Flag
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nope, there is clear desperation in these posts asking about the hunter w/ls...especially moms of dds. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 09:47 AM Flag
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op: Thank you. I am not desperaste, I am VERY happy with dd's spot for next year. But of course i would LOVE for hunter to happen, who wouldn't? And as for outing myself, there are only 12 girls on w/l (3 or 4 of whom have been called), that leaves a very small pool of w/l'ers left, it would be easy for someone to recognize me IRL. And no, only a handful of people know she is on w/l and those are people who asked me, I NEVER offer this info IRL. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 10:59 AM Flag
[ - ] Need b-day gift ideas for my 5 yo DD that are not all toys. Any favorites that you received? 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:43 AM Flag
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how about a bike? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:51 AM Flag
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she got one for christmas. maybe a bell for her bike. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:16 AM Flag
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np: also, basket, helmet, etc. scooter, if she doesn't have one, is also good. books are always great! stuff for her room. jewelry (play or real, depending on her..and you!) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 10:58 AM Flag
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my dd recieved some craft kits she loved, and a tiered nightie she can twirl in [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:15 AM Flag
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do you mean other things to play with or do you mean something completely different? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:18 AM Flag
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are you on a budget? sometimes clothing is nice... a new bathing suit or pool shoes. hair accessories. dd once got bangle bracelets that she *loved*. More expensive can be a museum membership or even a one time pass. Books, a magazine subscription. Music lessons or audio cds. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:24 AM Flag
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beach towels with her name on it, fancy pjs/nightgowns, necklace with a heart charm, birthstone earrings [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:35 AM Flag
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you want to know MY favorites or my DD's favorites? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:54 AM Flag
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books, movies, jewelry [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 10:49 AM Flag
[ - ] Westchester moms: Which Trader Joe's is better, the one on Central Ave (Hartsdale) or the on one Rt 22 in Eastchester??? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:33 AM Flag
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I find them to be the same [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 07:03 AM Flag
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the only thing I could say about them is that the one on Central Ave is newer. hate driving on central ave tho. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 07:04 AM Flag
[ - ] my 13 mo ds does not say 'mama'. he says 'this', 'car', 'dada'. this is making me crazy. i am starting to get worried. help 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Toddler 06.22.08, 06:15 AM Flag
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maybe he's just not that into you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:23 AM Flag
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that's mean. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:34 AM Flag
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lol. my dcs never said mommy until they had many other words. i kept telling myself it was b/c i was so fundamental to their world that i didn't need a name. ha ha. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:37 AM Flag
[ - ] congested newborn ... what else works besides saline drops? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Newborn 06.22.08, 06:14 AM Flag
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breastmilk. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:15 AM Flag
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our baby nurse did the craziest thing, but it totally worked. she put her mouth on the baby's nose and sucked it all out. amazing! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:15 AM Flag
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no way? really? how freaking disgusting [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:22 AM Flag
[ - ] cana 3.5 y.o. "do" a Nintendo DS? 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:13 AM Flag
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why on earth would you want to find out? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:14 AM Flag
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Sigh. DH sort of promised one to 6.5 y.o. and can't really give her one without getting something comparable for her sister. Taking an 8 hour flight this summer and having that kind of distraction for them wouldn't be bad... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:16 AM Flag
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Sigh. Get sister a leapster. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:23 AM Flag
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Actually looked at that quickly yesterday -- thanks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:26 AM Flag
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We have an L-Max which will hook up to the TV and takes all of the Leapster games plus the L-Max games, but we have only hooked it to the TV a few times and it looks like crap. Go with the regular Leapster and the the Get Puzzled game is one of dds favorite along with Backyardigan. It also comes with a built in drawing game that she loves. GL! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:35 AM Flag
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Thanks -- another Q: do they make noise? Volume control or headsets?? Don't want to take on the plane and make everyone hate us if it is noisy! TIA! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:36 AM Flag
[ - ] Where should we live? We need a town/burb with a train line to NYC (up to 1.5 hours). Must be artsy/bookish, large stock of pre-war homes, and ideally have some jews, say up to 25% of the population. TIA. 14 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:12 AM Flag
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oh, wow. I had a great suggestion, but I think it's more like 28% Jews. Sorry. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:16 AM Flag
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LOL! You I like! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:19 AM Flag
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Why so snarky? Obviously that's not what I meant. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:25 AM Flag
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Huntington, LI [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:22 AM Flag
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maplewood/south orange, nj [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:27 AM Flag
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Larchmont, ny [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:25 PM Flag
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Not artsy at all. Big banker/professional community. Lots of Jews tho. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 05:24 PM Flag
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does that frighten you ? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 06:30 PM Flag
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OR: not frightening per se, I am a Jew, grew up in 'burbs, hated the competative spirit then and I'm not fond of it now.. somehow I associate that with striving Jews, but I admit to the possiblity of wrongness. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.25.08, 06:28 PM Flag
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Mamaroneck - they have the Emelin Theatre for adults and children, a great library. Not sure of the exact % of jews, but I know the number is significant most likely 25%. Westchester Hebrew High School and the Westchester Jewish Center which has a nursery school are there. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 05:55 AM Flag
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Maplewood or South Orange. Very,very artsy (HS just won a Grammy for its music dept.!)lots of writers, book clubs,etc. My daughter went to something like 15 bar/bat mitzvahs last year. And the commute is much faster: most rush hour trains are 35 minutes to Penn Station. (Tho' there is one each morning that is 29 minutes.) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 06:48 AM Flag
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I live in NYC, but I would definitely look there. I am a fan of old houses, and there are a lot in South Orange. I also like Katonah and Westport. They are different from one another, but fit many of your requirements. I love Princeton and there are older homes in Princeton, but it's pretty conservative there (there's a museum, but it's not really artsy). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 06:55 AM Flag
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Princeton, not artsy, but very bookish.... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 05:51 PM Flag
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Rhinebeck, Millbrook, Fishkill, Beacon...but don't know the percentage of Jews there, just the distance, hope this helps. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 06:24 PM Flag
[ - ] Anyone familiar with Nintendo DS? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:00 AM Flag
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my dd has one. She's 8yr old and we got her the educational games. I play them too [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:58 AM Flag
[ - ] NYC moms: anyone been to or had a bday party at the Mc Burney Y? Seems like a reasonable price. Tx 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:51 AM Flag
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Fun party for swimmers - kids swam then had cake in a big room. There were no other activities, though [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:42 AM Flag
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tx [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:54 AM Flag
[ - ] want to go to a new playground this morning w 5 yo ds. live on uws, but will go anywhere in manhattan. want good water stuff, also needs to be good for 15 month old. any suggestions? we need a change of pace. 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 06.22.08, 05:50 AM Flag
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The playground near Battery Park City -- Roosevelt Playground? -- is a good choice. Hard to get to, but water play and lots of good playground eqipment. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:54 AM Flag
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np: this is a good one. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:54 AM Flag
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where is it? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:59 AM Flag
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I looked it up: Rockefeller Playground. Here's some pix: http://www.johanssondesign.com/new_page_2.htm. Map of area: http://www.bpcparks.org/bpcp/map/map.php [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:57 AM Flag
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thanks! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:59 AM Flag
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how about the water park on Jane St [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:55 AM Flag
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where? jane and the river? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:00 AM Flag
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jane st. and westside hwy has a nice water park, not a lot of shade tho. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:53 AM Flag
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ita, with all of this [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:54 AM Flag
[ - ] Any religious Jewish moms on? I am looking for a male counterpart to the name Eliana. I know Eliana for a girl means G-d has answered and I would love a boy name with the same or similar meaning? Can't use Emanuel. Thanks!! 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:45 AM Flag
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Eli [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:50 AM Flag
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That means ascend [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:52 AM Flag
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no, it means "my Gd" [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:21 AM Flag
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Samuel is what people usually use for that (infertility?) You could also do eliezer (Gd helps). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:20 AM Flag
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i was going to suggest samuel. it means God heard (or maybe God listened? not really sure). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:25 AM Flag
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^^^and if you are still reading this, i'll add that there's a biblical source for this. hannah, wife of eli, was barren for many years and when she finally had a child she named it samuel b/c God heard her cries. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:39 AM Flag
[ - ] Any drs on? If a two month old db has low neutrophils, would you recommend delaying vaccinations? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:44 AM Flag
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not a doctor but i would ask ped. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:45 AM Flag
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Obviously, but it's Sunday, so I thought I'd poll you all. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:46 AM Flag
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i would probably stagger them meaning one shot at a time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:49 AM Flag
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how do you know this? what is the cause of the low numbers? I would delay. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:31 AM Flag
[ - ] very nice Hunter mom who told me there was a school psych - could you give me the name and phone number please? Thanks! 14 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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NY Schools 06.22.08, 05:40 AM Flag
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does psych have to be for hunter? i know a great one downtown very will respected in the psych community. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:46 AM Flag
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np: name, please? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:11 AM Flag
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Hi, thank you - I am the OP and the reason I keyed on to Hunter psych is because this person will obviously be trained and have experience in problems related to "gifted" children. I know its hard to beieve, but there was a study done and guess who ended up being the most negative towards gifted children in the school support community? School psychologists. Weird huh? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 09:03 AM Flag
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my guess is that they were negative about all the freakish parents breaking down their doors to discuss their brilliant dcs. sounds like you are about to do that with a psych at a school where you don't even have a dc. hope she figures out a way to get rid of you gently. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 09:11 AM Flag
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Its the Marland Report if you want to see if you guess is correct. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 09:26 AM Flag
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NP: Wow, dh and have found that it on our private school and thought it was just us! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 09:36 AM Flag
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Her name is Barbara Ghnassi. If you call the main Hunter number (on the elementary school web page) they will connect you to her. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:52 AM Flag
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Wow - she is still there? She was there when I went to Hunter. She's great. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:25 AM Flag
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THANK YOU. THANK YOU. THANK YOU. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 09:04 AM Flag
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another desperate hunter w/l reject. now doing homeschooling because she cannot believe her dc might benefit form spending time with other kids during the day. it is a very sad type of desperation. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 09:06 AM Flag
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I'm not sure your post should be dignified with a response, but here goes. My child did not apply to Hunter. My dc will not apply to Hunter. I am a mom whose dc is struggling and I am looking for help. I'm also a really nice person in real life and a Christian - but if I weren't - I'd tell you what I thought of you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 09:13 AM Flag
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why bother the hunter psych? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 09:22 AM Flag
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Do you have any references you can give me? I'm looking for pshyc that have experience working with gifted children who are struggling. I'll take the names from any source. Hunter is the gold standard in gifted ed and I thought this person would be able to give me recs. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 09:24 AM Flag
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OK. GL, then. Sorry to upest you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 09:31 AM Flag
[ - ] Does anyone have the little trinket or tooth ferry box made by enchantmints? DD likes them - just curious, as I know they are pretty small. 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:26 AM Flag
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I don't have that but have the music box by the same company. I didn't know they had a tooth ferry box [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:53 AM Flag
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they are cute... see link http://www.chocolatecakeclub.com/hytofaboxbye.html [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:02 AM Flag
[ - ] Best party favor ever that your DD received? Need some ideas that are not too expensive. 49 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:22 AM Flag
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all party favors suck. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:24 AM Flag
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ok, you seem a little too bitter... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 10:13 AM Flag
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a goldfish in a little bowl. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:25 AM Flag
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that is gross [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:27 AM Flag
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ugh those die so soon [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:48 AM Flag
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cash [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:25 AM Flag
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1 lb of Godiva chocolate -- love that the birthday mom didn't even try to please the kids. just the other moms! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:26 AM Flag
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obnoxious [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:28 AM Flag
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Mean. If it was in addition to little toys for the kids, fine, but otherwise really unkind. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:58 AM Flag
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a swiss army knife [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:26 AM Flag
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a set of 20 different colors of fingernail polish [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:26 AM Flag
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how old was your DD when she got this? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:27 AM Flag
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oh my 4 yr old would love this [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:52 AM Flag
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A Junie B Jones book [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:27 AM Flag
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Dan Zanes CD [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:27 AM Flag
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OP here -- I should have mentioned for 5 and some 4 yo girls [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:28 AM Flag
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RAW STEAK [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:28 AM Flag
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hula hoop, beach bucket set [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:28 AM Flag
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oooohhhh - DD came home once with an underwater digital camera. I found out later that the nanny didn't notice she'd swiped a gift. we never told.... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:29 AM Flag
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snake eggs, we still play with them a year later. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:47 AM Flag
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the snakes? what kind? that seems dangerous. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:09 AM Flag
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their magnets you throw them up and the rattle. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:54 AM Flag
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you really thought that was a favor? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:58 AM Flag
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caracture of herself. The party had a artist there and the drawing was the favor. LOVED IT [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:47 AM Flag
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^^caracature (sp?) sorry but you know what I mean [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:48 AM Flag
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Hi, I LOVE this idea. do you have the name of the artist? I live on Long Island and would love to do this for my daughter's birthday party. Thanks, Andrea [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:12 AM Flag
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no I don't but if you google NYC caricature artist, you will get a bunch of names. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:52 AM Flag
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GCs to Baskin Robbins [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:49 AM Flag
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np; this is good esp. for summer and spring bdays [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:50 AM Flag
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cheap and the kids love it this yr..KID ROBOT in soho has these donut keychains that all the kids love getting. Each one is different and a character. They are like $3 each [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:50 AM Flag
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my dd loved the press on (adhesive) earrings that they sell for like $2-$3 for a large pack [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:52 AM Flag
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Quality over quantity: rather than a bag o' crap and candy, one small gift: a small book, new crayons/coloring book, hair clips, one Polly Pocket... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:58 AM Flag
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that's how i feel. i found these cute purses (felt with flowers) or was thinking about a cute headband from gymboree or something [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:00 AM Flag
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actually I found these cute pencil cases but they are $8 which seems a little much [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:01 AM Flag
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OR -- yeah. I feel like whatever it is, it is forgetten in like 5 minutes. To the kids, it is more about being handed something on the way out than what it actually is. My DD's have gotten all sorts of stuff from awesome to lame, and they've never judged the goody bag. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:02 AM Flag
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one girl gave out letters explaining they'd donated all their party bag money to charity. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:13 AM Flag
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We've been to parties where the parents say no gifts, but bring X to donate to charity. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:14 AM Flag
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I'm not sure I'd like that--what i i don't approve of the charity [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:18 AM Flag
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I doubt they're donating to nmbla or anything... i think that this is a great idea! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:42 AM Flag
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i think it's quite possibly the worst party favor ever -- but i disagree with your reasoning. you might not agree with the "war toy" plastic soldier and parachute, or with the tootsie rolls and lollipops, but a favor is just a toy or snack, not to be "agreed with" by the recipient's mother. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 09:02 AM Flag
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^^sorry, "approved of" [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 09:02 AM Flag
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ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:37 AM Flag
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yuck -- i'm sure the kids were thrilled [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:59 AM Flag
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A recent favorite was a pair of hello kitty sunglasses--all the girls loved them, and wore them on the way out [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:17 AM Flag
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my dcs favorites were a box of chalk and (believe it or not) play money. they had a blast with the money. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:34 AM Flag
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i've given out play money. you can get a whole tray of it (all paper denominations and coins in a little cash-register-like tray) at amazing savings for $1.99 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 09:05 AM Flag
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Paperback first reader books. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 10:08 AM Flag
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the best we got was a large, bouncy ball, with a happy face on it, wrapped in celophane. it was for a gym party. another great favor was a mellisa and doug puzzle (but a bit much, IMO.) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 10:14 AM Flag
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hats are really fun, also, what about t-shirts with the kids ages on them? You can make these really easily... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 10:20 AM Flag
[ - ] working moms with nannies, how do you work out wages and hours of your nanny? i just had baby #2 and am considering switching from daycare to nanny - my day begins 7-7:30 and i return at 6:00-6:30, what kind of wage is reasonable? (1st kid will stay in preschool most of day). 32 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 03:51 AM Flag
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where do you live? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:30 AM Flag
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$600 to $700 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:52 AM Flag
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so you will need a nanny from 6:30 am to 6:30 pm? 5 days a week? you should hire a nanny that looks just like you so your baby doesn't forget who the hell you are. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:28 AM Flag
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np: You're a horrible person and I hope you get what's coming to you saying something like that to someone. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:27 AM Flag
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She is a horrible person for saying that so nastily, but I've done a ton of babysitting, and it's the truth. It always amazes me that parents think that they can leave their kids with someone else for most of their waking hours, and not form more of an attachment to the care provider, especially true in a nanny situation as opposed to day care. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:41 AM Flag
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You want your child to form an attachment to the care provider, that's the point of a nanny, but you're delusional if you think they form more of an attachment to you than the parents. My son spends more time with me than the babysitter, but much less time with my husband than the sitter. He's still far more attached to my husband. Don't fear-monger. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:45 AM Flag
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how can that be? if the child sees more of someone else, how could htey possibly form an attachment? are they forming an attachment to pictures? to stories? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:46 AM Flag
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I'm guessing you're not a parent yourself. It's really not just about the hours you spend with a child. And I didn't say my son never sees dh. He spends all weekend with him, he sees him in the morning and often at night. He knows DH is his Dada and probably that DH loves him in a way the sitter doesn't. I don't know. He's his father and it's different than a sitter. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:50 AM Flag
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actually i am a working parent and i worry about the fact that my son spends a lot of time out of our hands. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:51 AM Flag
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Well of course you worry about the time your child isn't with you. You're the parent. On the other hand, doubt your sitter spends her idle moments worrying about your kid when she's not with him. That's one of the differences in the relationship and I think kids are pretty savvy and know who really loves them. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:53 AM Flag
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I think that really depends on the sitter and how caring she is. Obviously, if it is obvious to the kid that she really doesn't care, than they are not going to for as strong of an attachment. Hence I don't think that this is nearly the same problem if you send dc to daycare. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:56 AM Flag
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with #1 i WOH, and now with #2 i SAH. sorry to say, it's totally different. i fell terrible for cheating #1 the way i did. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:00 AM Flag
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actually, attachment is really just about the hours you spend with a child. do you know anything about attachment theory? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:11 AM Flag
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studies show that it's quality of time together, not sheer quantity, that is the key. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 02:12 PM Flag
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So one hour a day of REALLY quality time is better than 12 hours of just "regular" time? that's a load. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 02:22 PM Flag
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ita, you're talking about the op being away for almost all baby's waking hours a day, 5 days a week... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 02:31 PM Flag
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i guess everyone needs something to talk about w/their therapist later in life. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:49 AM Flag
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I'm not a babysitter any more, and was never a nanny... This was before I had dc. I saw most kids being very attached to nanny, not as much with parents. I got to see both when the others weren't around. Just my experience. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:49 AM Flag
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^^^ so no, the kids were never more attached to me than either parents or nanny... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:51 AM Flag
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i agree. well said. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:51 AM Flag
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you know, the post is a bit cavalier w/out a twinge of - HOLY SHIT, i won't see my kids at all.......... just very factual. somewhat disturbing. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:45 AM Flag
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Some people don't feel the need to inject guilt into every conversation. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:51 AM Flag
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i wish i were you! seriously. guilt colors a lot of things for me. perhaps that means i'm not making the right choices!! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:53 AM Flag
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seriously, when does OP plan to see her children? this is one of the saddest, most pathetic posts I've seen on UB and that says a lot. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:12 AM Flag
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I bet all of the wohm's here are in pretty much the same boat. When you factor in commuting times and lunch, people are out of the house far more than 8 hours. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:26 AM Flag
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depends on where you live. i'd ask other moms if htey know what the range is for your neighborhood. (don't ask nannies and don't ask people what they are paying...just ask if they know the range). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:33 AM Flag
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going rate is about $14/hr. I pay a fixed rate each week. She goes home early often or has days off when I'm home, but also works later some nights. It just seems easier to pay a flat rate than track hours. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 02:00 PM Flag
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if you don't pay overtime which is THE LAW you could be in trouble. it may be easier now but if she wanted to, she could go to the department of labor. you probably aren't paying her on the books either, I assume? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 02:02 PM Flag
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I do pay on the books. We pay her social security. It's like she's on salary I guess. She definitely gets paid for more hours than she works. Is this really illegal? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 02:05 PM Flag
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she is not a class of employee that can be paid a salary. she needs to get overtime. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 02:07 PM Flag
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It will end up being less money for her if we track the hours. She's not gonna like it, but I'll consult my accountant. thanks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 02:08 PM Flag
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ignore the ppl saying that you're not parenting your kid etc. i'm a wohm and dh is a wohd, and our nanny works 50 hrs/week. that's pretty standard among ppl we know. we pay $550/wk, in brooklyn, about to raise to 600. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 02:11 PM Flag
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