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Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

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Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] NYC - UES - where can I get 50+ kosher cupcakes for cmap b-day party. Everyone does Dunkin Donuts, but I'm not a big donut fan. I don't really want to spend a fortune either. Thanks. 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 07.10.08, 06:51 AM Flag
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Bruce's on 57th + 1st or Crumbs on 78th +3ed [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:57 AM Flag
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Crumbs is way too $$$ [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:59 AM Flag
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for that number, why not just find a kosher cake? might be cheaper [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:05 AM Flag
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Not on UES but the Buttercup Bake shop is kosher and they say they deliver. They are located on 72nd Between Col and Ams. 212-787-3800 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:41 AM Flag
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np But it will be a fortune [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:47 AM Flag
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there is one on 52nd and 2nd too, but they aren't cheap... $1.75/cupcake I think [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 08:50 AM Flag
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NP. Are these kosher? They are amazing! I think probably worth a splurge if your crowd is used to Dunkin Donuts at every party. THey deliver. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 10:21 AM Flag
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Try Supersol on Amsterdam bet. 92nd and 93rd. They get deliveries from suburban kosher bakeries (Zomicks in Long Island; Butterflake in Teaneck; Zaide's in Fair Lawn), and you may be able to put in a special order for cupcakes through Supersol. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 08:47 AM Flag
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^Also, there's a bakery on Grand Street in the Lower East Side (I think it's called Moshe's). You can order a Gertel's cake through that place, so I'd assume you could order cupcakes too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 08:50 AM Flag
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Greenbergs on madison [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 09:24 AM Flag
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$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 09:25 AM Flag
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my most favorite dessert? I think it is called - kosher parve place. Also there is Buttercup Bake Shop on like 51st and 2nd - check the website [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 10:10 AM Flag
[ - ] Flying for the first time with 10-wk old ds. Any tips and/or advice? Little nervous. 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:50 AM Flag
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it's actually not a bad age to travel with. nurse, nurse, nurse - especially during take-off and descent (the sucking helps with the discomfort from air pressure changes). also, we found it helpful to give a dose of infant mylicon drops (anti-gas) before take off and descent as well (gas sometimes results from pressure changes). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:55 AM Flag
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great advice. thank you! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:14 AM Flag
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yw - it will be fine. people are really a little in awe (frightened?) of the wee ones so tend to be more tolerant than when db gets older... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:25 AM Flag
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You'll be okay! They're very portable at this age. Try to minimize the stuff you take on board: maybe just baby in a carrier (Bjorn or sling) and a diaper bag/backpack with diaper supplies, snacks for you, change of clothes, wallet. And nurse often--it's soothing for baby and helps with pressure. Don't bother bringing a book for yourself, unless it's a long flight and dh is there to hold baby. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:21 AM Flag
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thank you. dh is with me which is great [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:26 AM Flag
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I was so freaked out about traveling when we first did it and it was all for nothing--he slept almost the whole way. I agree with the poster who said nurse as much as possible. I was amazed by how friendly fellow passengers and the flight crew were--most have been there already and sympathize! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 10:03 AM Flag
[ - ] I'm flying with 10 wk ds for first time tomorrow. Should I bring ebm on plane in the storage bags or bottles? Just wondering about pressure situation. Also, if in small cooler can I include a freezer pack? 15 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:50 AM Flag
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you can't just nurse him? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:51 AM Flag
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yes, but want some ebm for later in the day once we reach destination as i probably won't be able to pump right away. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:51 AM Flag
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i don't understand why you're pumping if you're with him. why can't you just nurse him when you get to your destination? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:54 AM Flag
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everyone is different. leave her alone. some people enjoy the freedom that pumping gives them [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:01 AM Flag
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I'm not picking on her. I just have never heard of someone pumping to feed the baby when they can nurse and have the baby with them. It seems like so much extra hassle. I don't get the upside? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:11 AM Flag
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i liked pumping since I could have some freedom and didn't need to be there to feed the db all the time. it also meant I could sleep at night and have dh do feeding. how is this a hassle to have time to oneself? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:44 AM Flag
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ITA. One of the joys of traveling when they are this young is you don't have to take all of that paraphenalia - no snacks since all you need is boobs, no crib since they sleep w/you, no toys since they don't play w/anythg except maybe dangly keys. But this sounds like a first timer & they always travel w/enough stuff to fill a 3 bedroom house. Never mind, once she has done a few trips with a toddler she will look back & sigh that she even asked this question. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:45 AM Flag
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I would just do in bottle-I took freezer packs but this was before all this security. tsa website may have the info on whether you can take this with you. you could also freeze milk now and take frozen stuff that will thaw for when you get there since you have 24 hrs to use it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:02 AM Flag
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Pack enough of what you need for a 24 hour period. That includes clothing, diapers, food, etc. Also pack additional clothing for you in case he spits up/throws up on you. You also don't know if your flight will be delayed/sit on the runway/canceled etc. so you MUST plan ahead. The airlines are generally a little less stringent on security for women with babies when it comes to the liquid rules. If you are traveling with someone, have him/her get on the plane when they allow people w/children on and get situated, but DO NOT get on the plane until the very last minute. If your child is cranky/screaming/uncomfortable NO ONE wants to hear him cry longer than necessary. And why do you want to be cooped up with a child on a plane longer than necessary? Make sure you notify the airline that you are traveling with an infant. If there is room on the plane they may let you bring the car seat on and have a seat for him provided you haven't bought him a ticket. Since he is 10 weeks and hasn't had shots, please be careful that he isn't around someone who is sick! Good luck!!! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:05 AM Flag
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this is great advice. also, the good thing about traveling at this age is that you don't need to take entertainment stuff along the way you do with older kids. enjoy it [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:07 AM Flag
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thanks. good advice. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:14 AM Flag
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This is good advice although I think the shots comment is a little overboard. Don't worry - it will be a lot easier than you think. Just be prepared for the worst and you'll be fine. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:16 AM Flag
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I took some spare ebm in bottles with a freezer pack and had no trouble last fall. Just let them know what it is when you go through security. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:13 AM Flag
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I would do bottles because you don't want to have the hassle of transferring the milk into the bottle on the plane. Also agree with poster above even if you are traveling alone...be the last one on the plane. My kids are 1, 5 and 7 and I always wait til the final boarding call to board. If dh is with us sometimes he gets on ahead to secure some overhead space...but even if I am alone with all 3, I am always the last on the plane. I wait until the aisle is completely clear walk to my seat and sit. Nevertheless there is usually some idiot who decides to get up and rearrange their crap in the overhead for 10 minutes while I stand there waiting to get by with my kids [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:17 AM Flag
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I took ebm in bottles with a freezer pack last fall and had no trouble. Keep it with you and just let them know what it is when you go through security. I chose bottles because I wanted to have them for refilling later in the trip and I wanted to carry fresh milk since it lasts longer thawed than frozen milk. Have a great trip - I found it to be easier than I thought it would be with my 9 week old (slept the whole time). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:19 AM Flag
[ - ] My son is 2yrs and 8months. He can count, but cannot recognize his numbers - if i show him the number 5 he does not know that it's five. He just guesses as to which # it is. Should he know them by now??? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:48 AM Flag
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why should he know them by now? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:51 AM Flag
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Why not? he should be able to see the #1 and know that it is that number. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 08:03 AM Flag
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not at that age, it is perfectly developmentally appropriate to recognize numbers (i.e. now they are not letters) but not to differentiate between them [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 08:07 AM Flag
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no worries [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:37 AM Flag
[ - ] Would anyone know the website for the NYU child evaluation program? I can't find it. My friend recommended that I contact them with my ds. We think he might be on the asperger spectrum. Also, would anyone know how expensive they are? Thanks! 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Toddler 07.10.08, 06:42 AM Flag
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It's aboutourkids.org. However I don't necessarily recommend them, though they have a good rep; there are developmental peds in NYC (Marilyn Agin, Maurine Packard, Ceci McCarton, Jennifer Cross) whom many of the SN moms take their kids to and we are very happy with them. P.S. The SN community in general has gone to you know where and you will get better responses there. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:23 AM Flag
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I would recommend them. There are many dev peds in NYC but they are not experts in Aspergers and that is what you'll get at NYU. My ds has AS and was dx'd at a very young age. Many Dev Peds will not dx AS at young ages but experts in AS will. Not that the above mentioned are not good but if you can go to a specialist in your dc's dx why not? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 03:23 PM Flag
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I agree but if OP's child is not AS (and it may be hard to tell as a parent or layperson just entering the SN world), then I wouldn't think of them as my first choice. However, if the AS suggestion is coming from someone knowledgeable, that's very different. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 05:21 PM Flag
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can you share the SN site everyone has gone to? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 02.16.09, 10:50 AM Flag
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you be mom dot com, select Special Needs board. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 02.16.09, 06:15 PM Flag
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I'm new to this site but not to PDD (pervasive developmental disorder). My son (who is now 17) was diagnosed with PDD at 18mts in NYC by Dr. David Kaufman (pneurologist). Ceci McCarton was still at Einstein but we stayed with her...tested w/ her and continued with her at her institute until we left manhattan in 2000. I attribute much of my son's growth to her care and suggestions. We were also involved with the 92nd st Y and their marvelous program for children with special needs. my son has been mainstreamed (with services) since we moved to CT...he was in third grade. He attended "Gillinberger" on Park and "AMAC" on 18th st. We had OT, BMod (at it's birth), speech and language....all under CC's guidence. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 02.20.09, 12:47 PM Flag
[ - ] Where is Tina Fey sending that little cutie pie, Alice? 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Preschool/Kids 07.10.08, 06:31 AM Flag
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is Alice actually cute? Her parents are well put together but not particularly attractive. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:32 AM Flag
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I know a few men who find Tina Fey hot. It may be her intelligence, you probably can't relate. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:48 AM Flag
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o.k. Tina [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:53 AM Flag
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I met Alice at the playground. She's very sweet. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:38 AM Flag
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meaning she's ugly. that's okay. maybe she'll be a swan. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:54 AM Flag
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Tina Fey is tremendously attractive, in and out and her husband and daughter are adorable looking. Come on... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:45 AM Flag
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So where's she going to school? Given the utter lack of cool, artsy parents at my pre-school, I'm guessing not mine! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:49 AM Flag
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Who is Tina Fey? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:01 AM Flag
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stalker [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:02 AM Flag
[ - ] Has anyone delayed cutting the cord after birth, even by a few minutes? Going to approach this topic at a prenatal today and just wondering what the reaction will be and how usual it is. 37 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:31 AM Flag
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why would you do this? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:35 AM Flag
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lots of studies indicating that the transfusion of cord blood the baby gets in the minutes after birth, through the umbilical cord, are highly beneficial to the baby. (Higher hematocrit levels, less anemia even months later, etc.) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:36 AM Flag
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I never heard of this but it sounds like a no-brainer, what Dr. wouldn't want this? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:40 AM Flag
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np- doctors are very resistant to it. I can't figure out why either, except for being in a hurry. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:41 AM Flag
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bingo, but that is terrible if true [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:41 AM Flag
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What studies? I have not heard of this. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:38 AM Flag
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so google it. The studies are very easily findable. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 08:10 AM Flag
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I left the cord for more than 20 minutes, but it was a homebirth, and one of the reasons I planned a homebirth. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:38 AM Flag
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OP, it's true that there are studies, so my recc is to print some of them out and bring them with you to have this conversation. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:46 AM Flag
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I don't think waiting really matters...honestly I'm sure the birth experience is shocking enough for the kid that he isn't going to notice that extra few minutes attached or not attached to the cord. That said I remember pondering these types of things when I was having my first and wish I had channeled my energy in more productive directions [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:22 AM Flag
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that is the most absurd thing I've ever heard. YOu hardly need to waste a lot of energy to make small, positive, beneficial birth choices like a 2-3 minute delay in cord cutting. What you mean is, it's easier to follow your dr like a sheep rather than advocate for any of your own positions. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:36 AM Flag
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ITTA. it's not a huge decision that will eat up precious time to ...do what? OP, I think it's totally fine. My OB waited a few moments, we didn't discuss, but he would have been OK with it I think. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 10:11 AM Flag
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Yes, until the cord stopped visibly pulsing. Our midwife was very sensitive to this, as that was our wish and the cord had been wrapped around the baby's neck during labor. Allowing the umbilical flow to resume and stabilize was beneficial, as the baby pinked up after the cord was straightened out; she was suctioned while still attached. A friend had intended to delay cutting as well, yet the cord in their case was truly compromising the baby's immediate health. For all the similarity, every birth is so individual. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:40 AM Flag
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that is great. midwives rock. Where did you give birth? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:46 AM Flag
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this is fascinating--can you post a link to some of the studies you read on this? I am definitely going to look into it for my second dc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 08:12 AM Flag
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http://pediatrics.aappublications.org/cgi/content/abstract/117/4/e779 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 08:13 AM Flag
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http://www.thelancet.com/journals/lancet/article/PIIS0140673606688582/abstract [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 08:14 AM Flag
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thanks! This is what this board should be, an exchange of real, helpful information. My OB never mentioned this with my first dc and I am grateful to you for bringing it to my attention. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 09:50 AM Flag
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you're so welcome, and I hope your OB is receptive to the idea, too! (I figure, Pediatrics and The Lancet are highly respected, peer-reviewed journals--they can't give me TOO much of an argument about this!) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 10:52 AM Flag
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I just printed out the article to show him...in fact now that I am hearing it is so common it is making my question how good/up to date my OB is. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 10:56 AM Flag
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I'm afraid it's par for the course for OBs to argue with this--push it as much as you feel comfortable. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:04 AM Flag
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np: Even my middling OB did this - baby was suctioned then placed on my chest with the cord still attached and pulsing. This was for my first child, vaginal birth. I had an emergency section for second baby, and he was a preemie in distress, so no time to wait! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 09:54 AM Flag
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I had delayed cord cutting w/ 2nd birth in birthing center. My midwife does this as standard practice. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 08:45 AM Flag
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it was assumed to be the usual procedure at my 2d birth (SLR). i think we didn't actually do it b/c of issues with my baby, but nobody thought it was weird. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 10:05 AM Flag
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Our Dr. did this no problem. She had to hang on to the baby for an extra couple of minutes, but she was happy to do it. Ask your Dr. before you assume he or she will put up a fight. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:01 AM Flag
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I am more confused and upset by the fact that we would have to ASK for this. Should our OB's be up to date and informing us of any new research? Why did I have to learn about this on a message board? I have always been the type to trust a doctor's authority without question, but now I am thinking, we should be demanding more! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:23 AM Flag
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np: That's true that you would hope your OB would be up on the best practices for your baby. But since I haven't seen the studies, I tend to wonder whether the groups were adjusted to take into account that babies who are cut off right away will include all those babies with problems at birth (I posted above that my c-section baby couldn't wait with his cord - he was preemie and not breathing!). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:27 AM Flag
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np: why wouldnt it? scientist aren't idiots, they control for taht stuff when they can. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:29 AM Flag
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Lately I have been reading about all sorts of bad control groups for studies. I don't think they are idiots, I just think they are no more infallible than our OBs. Of course, since there is no downside in doing it, I am glad my OB did it and think OP should ask her too as well. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:32 AM Flag
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even still, I have a friend who is a cellular biologist and you would be amazed at how many "scientific" findings are presented in the media with no scientific trials attached. or the methodology is faulty. Often it is hard to do research of this kind on babies too because it is hard to have a control group. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:32 AM Flag
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in the media, sure. but there's a link up there to the lancet. they're not publishing your study unless you controlled it well. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:35 AM Flag
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that is certainly a good point. And clearly, keeping the cord on is not "necessary" in any way to have a healthy, wonderful child (just look at all of us, right? And I wasn't even breast-fed:) Still, it would be nice to have new research presented with pros and cons for consideration. Hope all is well with your baby by the way! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:30 AM Flag
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Thanks, he's great now. I have to say, my experience with #1 was much more lovely (not to mention less terrifying) - he was put all slimy on my chest with his cord still attached until it stopped pulsing and we just looked at each other. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:34 AM Flag
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np- that is much more lovely, all right :-) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:44 AM Flag
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there is actually a study done SPECIFICALLY on delayed cord clamping and preemies--the delay benefits them most of all. The immediate cord clamping that's done with a c/s is for the benefit of mom, not baby. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:44 AM Flag
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you should never trust your doctor, or any professional, without question. your doc may have a good reason for not doing this, and if so nothing wrong wuith you accpetig it. but you shoudl feel free to ask anything. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:28 AM Flag
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I mean this so completely seriously: this is why you choose a midwife. OBs do not, as a rule, practice evidence-based medicine. They practice ligigation-based, and scheduling-based, medicine, by and large. And I totally share your sense of frustration about this and many other obstetrical issues. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:43 AM Flag
[ - ] I am 7 months post partum and have been having normal periods for months now. Yesterday, I started bleeding but I have already had my period this months..a few weeks ago. Im about 99 percent positive that this is not miscarriage bleeding. Has anyone ever had 2 periods in one month?TIA 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:30 AM Flag
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Your cycles could be pretty irregular for a while. I had several very short cycles and now they are slowly lengthening a bit. They've been 23-27 days long, so yes, I have two a month. It sucks!!! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:46 AM Flag
[ - ] anybody use castor oil to get labor started? did it work? did you feel awful? 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:22 AM Flag
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OB gave my castor oil when my 1st dc was three weeks late. She was due on Christmas Day and we tried it in mid Jan. Nothing happenned but misery for me. We finally induced. This was years ago - they would never let you go that long now. gl! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:31 AM Flag
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doula here--have had lots of clients use castor oil to induce labor. How far along are you? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:33 AM Flag
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i'm three days late, ob wants to induce if i go a week over. she stripped my membranes yesterday and suggested i take castor oil, but i'm not thrilled about vomiting and diarrhea (as i've read in a couple of the books i have). wondering if i'm scaring myself over nothing or if i should just wait a few more days. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:34 AM Flag
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You should absolutely take a few more days. The important thing to know first of all is that inducing one week after due date with no medical indication is unnecessary, a bad idea, and increases your chances of c/s threefold. There is NO reason to be in such a hurry here. You are only 3 days over. Do you know if you are effaced/dilated at all? If your cervix is not very very ripe, I wouldn't even consider taking castor oil. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:36 AM Flag
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she said 1 cm dilated, 60% effaced, so definitely things are happening. she checked amniotic fluid yesterday and said it all looks good. i feel fine! my instinct is to wait it out a few more days, but i want to avoid a big wallop of pitocin next week. i think i'll just go for a nice long walk... :) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:37 AM Flag
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I would give this more time without worrying about it too much. I'd also recommend taking an evening primrose oil supplement immediately. 500 mg in the morning orally, and insert another pill vaginally at night. Think about acupuncture, as well. Avoid induction. Seriously. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:39 AM Flag
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i haven't heard about evening primrose oil before, but i'll check it out. thank you so much for your advice! i think i'm suffering some unnecessary anxiety because of the "rush." [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:41 AM Flag
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I know how you feel, and it's so aggravating because feeling pressured and rushed is SO counterproductive when it comes to labor! :-) Just know that your baby will come when s/he is ready, and all will be well. Oh, maybe consider acupuncture as well. GL!! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:44 AM Flag
[ - ] my dh lost his job, and i need to figure out what to do about my dc's schools. one of my dc's has been going to a private school for gifted kids for the last 2 yrs and my preschooler is in montessori. i will get some bogus retail job to pay for their school...but do you think its worth me working an extra 3 hrs a day (almost FT) to pay for the gifted school if i can send gifted dc to the montesesori school the younger dc goes to for half the price? 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:22 AM Flag
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why isnt DH getting a retail job? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:24 AM Flag
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op-b/c he needs to get a real job to cover all the other bills...more likely he will get one as i have been out of market for several years. i am also looking for a "real job" but have immediate financial pressure re: their school [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:33 AM Flag
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then pay for the gifted school as DH will soon have a job and you will be glad of the continuity. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:35 AM Flag
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Is there no decent public school where you live, maybe with gifted program? That's the way I would go. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:48 AM Flag
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can you ask the private school for some aid or temporary relief because of the job situation. If your dc is doing well at the school, I would try to keep him there. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:04 AM Flag
[ - ] My sis lives 3 states away, and for the past 3 years has sent her dd up to stay with us for a few weeks over the summer, my dd is a few years younger and adores her cousin completely, and they get along really well. My brother & his wife live near us, and yesterday my sil invited my niece to go to an amusement park and told her that my dd couldn't go because she didn't have enough room. She does, by the way, have plenty of room, it's only her and her db and my niece. So my dd is now crying because her Aunt doesn't want her, and hoping she'll call back and change her mind. What the f*k is wrong with my sil??? 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:14 AM Flag
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No, what is wrong with your brother? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:15 AM Flag
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Yeah, I wondered that too. I don't want to talk to him right now bc I'm really angry, trying to calm down first. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:16 AM Flag
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I understand. But in the end, he should have stopped his wife from being such an idiot about this. My mother loves to blame my SIL for all sorts of crap, I have to repeatedly point out that her son (my brother) lets it all happen, in fact it could be all his idea for all we know. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:17 AM Flag
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My dad was at sil's house when she did this, my brother wasn't home, so I'm trying to give him the benefit of the doubt and maybe he told her what an idiot she was last night. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:20 AM Flag
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Be direct - ask her what the deal is, as you take her kid all the time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:17 AM Flag
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No, this is my sil, not my sister. My sister would never do this. But I have had sil's engagement party, rehearsal dinner and baby shower at my house. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:18 AM Flag
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I think you SIL felt that it was enough to handle her db and one older child - that your daughter was too much for one person to handle. Not very considerate but not a capitol offense either imo. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:26 AM Flag
[ - ] Is it totally stupid to get a real estate license in this market? Been out of job market for a while..trying to find quick practical source of income. 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:14 AM Flag
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lol, real estate has never been a quick source of income. It takes 5+ years to start making consistent money. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:26 AM Flag
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Marry a super of a big building. That has been the ticket for our resident realtor, she makes tons of money and is rather incompetent. But she gets all the listings regardless. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:52 AM Flag
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where do you live? How much are you looking to make? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 09:48 AM Flag
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i think phone sex chicks make some nice $$$ [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 10:02 AM Flag
[ - ] MY sil has one kid, and he is the worst behaved dc i have ever seen (he is 5) I am PG with #4, she is ALWAYS dumping this kid on me (she is a divorced wild child) My dh, who doesn't really like his sister, tells me that this is my fault and I need to tell her myself that I don't wish to watch her dc, but she asks SO much, how can I stop this (BTW, i am surew you can tell I am the type of person who has a hard time saying no to people) 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:11 AM Flag
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Your DH should man-up and help you out on this. It's his sister. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:13 AM Flag
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ita [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:44 AM Flag
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I agree with your DH. You need to put a stop to it. "Actually, SIL, I'm not feeling up to it. This pregnancy is really wearing me out and I have my hands full with my own kids right now. I really can't handle the energy of a 5 yo boy. Good luck!" [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:58 AM Flag
[ - ] I am considering leaving my dh. He says he is madly in love with me, but my life with him in our 9 years of marriage has been totally undependable. From various breaches of intimacy to the last three summers in a row with job upheaval. Again, this summer he is out of work - another consulting/job gig comes to a halt and he had nothing else set up..even though he knew for months it was unstable. We have enough $$ to pay for living expenses for 3 mths and then need to borrow form his family...at which we will have to sell our house, and move overseas to live with his family. Kids uprooted, me losing my home etc - its the last straw. I'm almost 40...and feel like everything with him is unreliable. Question is..do I try to make plans toward a life without him now - or wait for him to get a job and then start planning? When do I tell him that its over? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:10 AM Flag
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I think only you know when you are DONE. But I think it's a good idea to have a stable plan for you and your kids before you leave. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:12 AM Flag
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What is a "breach of intimacy"? btw I'm sorry. We've had some job upheaval too but it seems to be a way of life for many many people these days. gl [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:15 AM Flag
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op-many years ago, right after we married he flat out cheated - not sex, but some chick gave him oral sex..3 weeks after we returned from honeymoon. Horrid huh? I found out years later..but several times thereafter there was secret long distance inappropriate calls and emails with various women he knew. Nothing has happened in several years and he is mr super devoted. He had very serious issues that we went to therapy for, but all that history, added to all this new instability over last few years is just too much. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:19 AM Flag
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I can understand that. Wow. I wonder if he'd like to do it all over knowing that the damage he did is irreperable.. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:29 AM Flag
[ - ] HI, I am a SAHM, i was just offered a baby sitting job, 2 little girls would come to my house at 7 am, i would feed them and take them to school at 9 am, pick them up from school at 3pm (I would be driving and using my gas)They would stay at my house until between 5 and 6 every night, I would help them with their homework and feed them dinner. The mother wants me to come up with some sort of salary, what should I ask for a week? 29 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 05:52 AM Flag
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I think I saw your post yesterday (unless the Mom was posting). I would pay $15-$20 per hour for someone to do that for my 2 dcs. Maybe with gas costs on top if they will be high. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 05:56 AM Flag
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I saw that post yesterday too. Is it possible the mom who needs babysitting was the poster? Everyone went beserk on the rates she was looking to pay. I think the consensus is that that amount of money is ridiculous. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:43 AM Flag
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depends on how affluent a community you are living in. I's 20-30 hours/week plus gas and breakfast and dinner. $400/week? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:08 AM Flag
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she doesn't want to pay that much, she suggested $150 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:13 AM Flag
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np: How much is the hourly sitting rate in your area? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:13 AM Flag
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Th HS kid next door gets $10 for one kid.... I live in a nice part of Nassau County LI [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:17 AM Flag
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So then this woman is trying to rip you off. The discrepancy between her offer and the going rate is so large, don't even think of taking this job. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:18 AM Flag
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she kept saying, "the girls are older (7 and 9) and its barley a job as they are pretty self sufficent, and for a large part of the day they will not be with me and she is a single mom, bla bla bla" [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:20 AM Flag
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Just say "No, thanks." Anyone who talks like this is going to be a nightmare to deal with. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:21 AM Flag
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THX [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:23 AM Flag
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I agree. If she doesn't value you now, it is just going to get worse. Her situation should have nothing to do with you, it is a business arrangement not a personal one. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 09:38 AM Flag
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my friend lives in Alberston, has the same scenario, kids are 8yrs old, and pays $15 an hour, in her own home, so she supllies the food, and the babysitter doesnt drive them anywhere, walks them to the busstop. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 09:33 AM Flag
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or: i figured as much - she can probably get after school care somewhere for about that much, but she needs to understand that individual care is more expensive. if she provides gas and food, then it's up to you to decide what your time is worth. if you are comfortable doing it for less - say you want/need a little extra money and you're home anyway - then i'd say at least $200-$250 (w her paying gas/food) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:22 AM Flag
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that's about $5/hour. no way. as much as your don't realize it, you will be inconvenienced by this. Not to mention the cost of gas, food for snacks, etc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:26 AM Flag
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$150??? That is INSANELY unfair. If you're charging $15 an hour, x 4 hrs a day that's $60 a day--right there that's 300 a week, not to mention what you're going to spend on food feeding them two meals a day. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:38 AM Flag
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^^and gas. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:40 AM Flag
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are your dc going to school at the same time/place? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:23 AM Flag
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no, but a very near by school [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:23 AM Flag
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same time? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:26 AM Flag
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no her school starts and ends 15 min earlier and is about 10 min away from my dc school [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:27 AM Flag
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i would say 250-300 minimum. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:30 AM Flag
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I would NOT do this if I were you oP [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 09:34 AM Flag
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How many kids do you have and how will you transport everyone? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:33 AM Flag
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i have 3, and a mini van that woill hold andother 2 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:35 AM Flag
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$650 a week [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:34 AM Flag
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My friend lives in Albertson and pays her babysitter who does this exact thing $15 an hour, the kids are 8 yrs old, and she says he is lucky to get away with that little. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 09:32 AM Flag
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just a thought: maybe check into how much she'd be paying for aftercare at a school that provides it. we're not in nyc but the ymca provides aftercare at many schools onsite. the kids would def. be better off in someone [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 09:45 AM Flag
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^home than in a school cafeteria for those hours so you should get paid at least what she'd pay aftercare for two kids. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 09:45 AM Flag
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One thing to add to the hopper is if you committ to this you have to take her kids to/from school when yours are home sick. That sucks! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 09:52 AM Flag
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