• Filter the conversation
 

Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] do you want to be cremated or buried? 21 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
 ]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:21 AM Flag
»
don't really care that much. Just want to be buried or sprinkled in a particular spot [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:36 AM Flag
»
i don't care either...trying to help a friend decide about her child. i think she thought she would want cremation but now feels like it will traumatize him or something [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:38 AM Flag
»
wait - her child died or she is worried about her own death? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:38 AM Flag
»
her child died [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:40 AM Flag
»
oh god. I'm so sorry. The spot I mentioned was where my son is buried. The advantage of cremation is that she can keep some ashes with her. But sometimes people get obsessive about that. The advantage of having him buried is that she will have a place to visit him. (even though he is not there of course) If I can help in any way - answer anything you can't ask IRL etc - I will be happy to help. :-( [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:42 AM Flag
»
oh, thanks so much. i'm sorry about your son. it must be so difficult. she, of course, never really thought of what she would do in this situation and it was a completely unexpected death. suddenly they have to make all of these decisions and i think she doesn't trust herself. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:45 AM Flag
»
does she have family that can step in and help? My IL's made most of the plans - which funeral home, where to have the service etc. We just picked the details. It is horrific - esp if it's sudden. She will need tons of support for at least the next year. The first year is the hardest but it is still hard and my son would have been 6.5 (died at 3 days old) Send her to Missfoundation.org for some on line support if you think she would be interested. It saved my life. The forums are great. You can go too and get tips about how to help her. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:47 AM Flag
»
i think her bigger problem is that too many people want to step in. i think that once she settles the burial vs. cremation thing it will be easier but, you know, she is talking to me because I'm NOT a family member [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:51 AM Flag
»
is this the mom who was on here yesterday talking about her 4yo DD? She said she ahd a friend coming in to help her. There really is no right or wrong way to do this. She will just have to figure out what makes her most comfortable and honestly, nothing will at this point. What about teh child's father? Is he available to help make decisions? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:53 AM Flag
»
she has a 4 year old daughter but her son died. could be her. the father is very..."whatever you decide, I'll support" and is frustrating her [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:54 AM Flag
»
sounds like the same person. I have been thinking about her ever since I saw her post. Please tell her to come and ask for me here if she wants to talk. I'm here more than I care to admit! She can call me heart defect mom. Or she can go to the missfoundation website and look for me there. My screen name is Layniac. SIgh. I hate to hear about anyone else going through this. It is so very very hard. She has some really tough days ahead of her and will need you a lot. You are a good friend [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:56 AM Flag
»
i will pass on the info, thanks. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 11:09 AM Flag
»
oh, i'm so sorry. god bless you. np here. i get tears in my eyes thinking of you mothers who had to face the most difficult in life and go on god bless you always [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:45 AM Flag
»
thank you. That is very sweet. It is hard but you have to figure out a way to go on. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:48 AM Flag
»
i'd like to be buried. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:41 AM Flag
»
use whatever parts still work. Then put me in the compost heap. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:44 AM Flag
»
Please don't bury me Down in that cold cold ground No, I'd druther have "em" cut me up And pass me all around Throw my brain in a hurricane And the blind can have my eyes And the deaf can take both of my ears If they don't mind the size Give my stomach to Milwaukee If they run out of beer Put my socks in a cedar box Just get "em" out of here Venus de Milo can have my arms Look out! I've got your nose Sell my heart to the junkman And give my love to Rose [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:56 AM Flag
»
M.A.O? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:57 AM Flag
»
john prine [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:58 AM Flag
»
LOL! I know. I just wondered if you were my friend M.A.O. writing those lyrics. We used to sing it in college all the time [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:59 AM Flag
»
nope, just another fan! [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 11:01 AM Flag
[ - ] what is a good train set for my 23 mo ds? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
 ]
Toddler 05.28.08, 10:20 AM Flag
»
ikea has a set that is compatible w/ Thomas. Target also has a train table + tracks that is pretty reasonable. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:31 AM Flag
»
brio or anything like it [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:32 AM Flag
»
thomas is great for that age. the wooden railway-- not the metal stuff. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:37 AM Flag
[ - ] Speaking of real estate market, we are in Manhattan and the studio next door just came onto the market. We could definitely use more space, would you buy today? Also, how low could we offer if ask is 425K? 21 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
 ]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:19 AM Flag
»
Buy it But it Buy it! Also, NY Mag ran an article a week or two ago about adjoining condos you mgith check it out. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:20 AM Flag
»
We literally just did this, and after six months of construction we are just about to move home. Be prepared. It is a bigger undertaking than you think... [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:21 AM Flag
»
ita, erasing a kitchen is a pain in the ass [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:25 AM Flag
»
Is it really? Can you give me a ballpark how much it was? Also, did you live there while it was going on? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:31 AM Flag
»
offer 10 percent less- that is the starting neg point- [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:21 AM Flag
»
I don't know your market but that seems very low to me - that would be an offer of 380. I would say 400 and go to 410. Also, your Broker must do the offer anonymously. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:22 AM Flag
»
We live in Manhattan, and just put an offer in on a condo on the uws that was 777, and we offered 700. They came back at 740. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:24 AM Flag
»
are you going to sell at some point or stay there forever? sometimes it sucks to be the biggest/most expensive unit in the building. other than that, go for it [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:22 AM Flag
»
I assume we will sell at some point (like when we retire and kids go to college) but not anytime soon. We'd definitely be the most expensive apartment in the building, but if we move to get the extra space it will cost us a lot more. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:31 AM Flag
»
you just have to keep that in mind when you go to sell...you'll likely take a little loss...and definitely know what the renovation will cost you. If you can complete as much of that as possible before yuo knock down those connecting walls, you can live there longer during the renovation [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:34 AM Flag
»
Yes we are trying to get an architect to look at the combination options and get some quotes. I am sure it won't be cheap but still think we'd come ahead compared to moving. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:38 AM Flag
»
and you get the place done the way you want it. if you can afford it, go for it [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:40 AM Flag
»
my friends wanted to do this but the added maintenance cost really killed the dream. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:36 AM Flag
»
was it double? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:36 AM Flag
»
there was no break for the two apt synergy. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:39 AM Flag
»
There will be added maintenance but not that much, as it is a small studio. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:39 AM Flag
»
How big is the studio? What neighborhood? What condition is it in? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:36 AM Flag
»
Not very big (maybe 350sft, 400 tops), UWS, estate condition. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:39 AM Flag
»
in that case, I think the studio is overpriced. I would tell them that you are interested, but you think the value is closer to $350k, max. Talk to a realtor about what an estate condition studio is worth per sq. ft. I would really be surprised if it is more than $1000. Once your neighbor's apt. sits on the market for a while, they will realize they way overpriced it. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 11:51 AM Flag
»
We did this and it was great. However, your neighbors know how much this could potentially mean to you so they might hold you hostage for $$$ [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 11:45 AM Flag
»
How long did it take and how much did it cost? I don't think we'd be held hostage, they may think they can get asking price but the place is in a sorry shape so you have to gut it down no matter what, which is not so appealing if the studio is all there is. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 11:51 AM Flag
[ - ] Any idea if Keen shoes/sandals run small? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
 ]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:15 AM Flag
»
Mine fit true to size. I love my Keens. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:18 AM Flag
»
funny but the more I read reviews of them the more it seems like a total love-fest. A Cult of Keen-wearers! [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:19 AM Flag
»
mine are true to size too, have them on right now - so comfy. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:33 AM Flag
[ - ] Ouch! NY Post review of SATC movie...not very flattering of SJP. Calls out her mole as being the size of Mt. Rushmore! Can you believe that? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
 ]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:14 AM Flag
»
Yes, it is huge. My 6.5 yo DD said something about it. SJP tries to make these "statements" when she should just try to look better. The mole isn't cute--it adds to her witchy look. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:19 AM Flag
»
I am amused by the attachment to her mole. She's no natural beauty - boobs, nose, etc. have all gone under the knife. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:21 AM Flag
»
i've honestly never noticed a mole on her. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:28 AM Flag
[ - ] I'm freaking out. 13wks preganant and I have two new stretch marks. I'm JUST beginning to show. #1 trashed me--I'm going to be a freak when this is done. 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
 ]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:14 AM Flag
»
Well you are going to be a mom - I feel sorry that you feel so physically devastated. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:23 AM Flag
[ - ] how do i defrost chicken cutlets fast? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
 ]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:13 AM Flag
»
run under hot running water [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:15 AM Flag
»
not hot! cold water. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:16 AM Flag
»
in a sink full of cold water [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:16 AM Flag
[ - ] Have a playdate today. I have a cold (runny nose, cough) DD does not. Cancel? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
 ]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:12 AM Flag
»
is the playdate for you or her? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:12 AM Flag
»
it's for her, but not sure if the other mom would be happy that I am sick? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:16 AM Flag
»
call and ask [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:17 AM Flag
[ - ] Has anyone started an alternative old-school UB site yet? 20 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
 ]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:11 AM Flag
»
ha [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:12 AM Flag
»
oh what an idea. hmmm what should we call it? mommy's in nyc? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:13 AM Flag
»
how about stupid whiners anonymous? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:15 AM Flag
»
Okay, killjoy. And you love this lame new format? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:17 AM Flag
»
get over it already. It's free. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:19 AM Flag
»
Finally, a good point. - OP [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:23 AM Flag
»
the format is actually better and if you check out the planned fixes, it wil be fine. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:23 AM Flag
»
i so totally agree. i find it funny how "hip" cool moms can't handle change. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:32 AM Flag
»
while everyone here thinks thaey have gifted children, it wi pretty obvious that they dont' have gifted mothers. And the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:36 AM Flag
»
Yes. Youbemom.com. It's great. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:23 AM Flag
»
thank you. hallelujah. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:27 AM Flag
»
np: I checked it out and felt is was insecure. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:28 AM Flag
»
It had a complex? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:39 AM Flag
»
I've tried to join...they say they have me email registered (so I can't re-register) and tehn tell me go through an access provided in an email.....which is never sent. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:29 AM Flag
»
It's a copycat board set up by some mom. I wouldn't go there. Not confidential. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:33 AM Flag
»
It's exactly what UB was like before CNET bought it. Paranoid much? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:38 AM Flag
»
Eh. To be honest I prefer this UB. The snarkiness is gone, as are the nasty comments about my dc's school. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:40 AM Flag
»
That's because it's only May. Once we hit the middle of July and the application season revs up the nastiness about certain schools will be back [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:42 AM Flag
»
great! something to look forward to! [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:44 AM Flag
»
ITA. Really, who cares what I write here? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:43 AM Flag
[ - ] have chicken cutlets in freezer - how do i get them defrosted and ready to fry by 5 pm? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
 ]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:11 AM Flag
»
Soak in a bowl of cold water (in the plastic bag). They'll defrost within 30 - 60 minutes. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:13 AM Flag
[ - ] Is it even slow at lunchtime now? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
 ]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:11 AM Flag
»
seriously. Um, what number am I thinking of? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:11 AM Flag
[ - ] How do you know when marriage is over? (Serious question -- any ideas?) 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
 ]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:11 AM Flag
»
I'd imagine that is different for everybody [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:20 AM Flag
»
When you don't care about your spouse. The opposite of love is not hate, it is indifference. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:20 AM Flag
»
I'm starting to think I've hit this. I feel like such a jerk. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:22 AM Flag
»
I agree- when spending time with them is no longer something you actively look forward to, and the idea of being with them for the long run has stoppped being a good one. I watched my sister and bil ignore these symptoms for years until he finally got caught cheating with someone from work. It has taken a few years, but my sister has finally moved on. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:23 AM Flag
»
OP: I spent the weekend with DH and DB on a short trip and thought I would rather be alone or just with DB, but really just so TIRED of DH. How pathetic... [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:25 AM Flag
»
how old is db? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:25 AM Flag
»
2 [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:27 AM Flag
»
have you talked to him about it? Is he feeling the same? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:28 AM Flag
»
We've been in therapy, but stopped for scheduling reasons for the last month. Today, he asked if I wanted "a break" -- as in he'd move out -- and he's been complaining/threatening for a while. It's mostly coming from ME though, the therapy, the apathy, etc. He's "trying." [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:31 AM Flag
»
what was the therapist saying? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:31 AM Flag
»
That I was angry. That things were getting better, improving, but that we weren't "there yet." I am also in therapy alone, and get a different vibe -- like I should stop apologizing for being unhappy. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:35 AM Flag
[ - ] at work and forgot the stupid shields (cones) for my breast pump. Any other way to pump? 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
 ]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:07 AM Flag
»
Are you near a duane reade or CVS? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:07 AM Flag
»
no [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:08 AM Flag
»
manual expression...you probably won't get as high of a yield but it is better than nothing. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:08 AM Flag
»
hand-express (at least to give you some relief) [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:08 AM Flag
»
there's a guy on Craigslist... [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:09 AM Flag
»
I'd run out and buy an inexpensive manual pump-- Avent Isis is good. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:13 AM Flag
»
Medela Harmony is good too. I often preferred it to the electric one and the parts are interchangeable with the other Medela ones. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:39 AM Flag
[ - ] I'm going to a birthday party for b/g twins who are turning 5. Is it okay to give a single present--a science kit toy they can do together--or do I have to get two presents, one for each? Thanks. 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
 ]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:06 AM Flag
»
I think two presents. Go with smaller less expensive present if you want. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:14 AM Flag
»
I have b/g twins & a dd 1 yr older but around same date so have 1 party. People usually say 3 gifts, but I feel badly. Next time I am going to suggest people give one gift that can be shared. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:20 AM Flag
»
two [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:22 AM Flag
»
I gave books they both coudl enjoy, btu each had packages to open. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:26 AM Flag
[ - ] Feeling very depressed. I have a history of anxiety/depression and had PPD OCD. I am on Zoloft 175mgs. Was feeling better but get my bad days. This last week I feel unusually tired and hopeless. Right now I feel nauseas like I am getting an anxiety attack. I am burned out, so bored at my job, DH stresses me out and I am just plain old tired (NO MOTIVATION to make changes). 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
 ]
Newborn 05.28.08, 10:05 AM Flag
»
are you in cbt? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:08 AM Flag
»
Yes - did that. I like therapy BUT I never get motivated to do what they suggest. I know that is a poor excuse. but the truth [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:13 AM Flag
»
you need to stop looking for your answers in a pill and focus on CBT. Your job is boring? Go to the gym at lunch or take a wlak in th sunshine for 15 minutes. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:20 AM Flag
[ - ] anyone hear of the controversy in australia about the nude photographs of 12 and 13yo kids? 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
 ]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:03 AM Flag
»
nooo... [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:04 AM Flag
»
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/worldnews/article-1022381/Hollywood-star-Cate-Blanchett-defends-exhibition-nude-photos-girls-aged-12-13.html [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:06 AM Flag
»
hmm.. I stand with the prime minister. even if the photos were "tastefully" done, I think a 12/13yo girl can be swayed to posing for nude pics by the allure of it being "glamorous". [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:10 AM Flag
»
op: ita. of all the subjects he could have worked with, nude 12yo girls appealed to him? did you see the second picture in the article? i would be v unconfortable with that [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:16 AM Flag
»
ew whats that about [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:05 AM Flag
»
why would anyone let their children pose nude, art or not? that is prime molesting age too. stupid [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.28.08, 10:11 AM Flag
Refresh » New Post »
Select Category
close [X]

close [X]

Select a Category (only 1)

category
Stages
Regions