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Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] When do babies roll over? My 4 m/o can roll onto his side when he's on his back, but no more than that. 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:53 AM Flag
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when dc figures out how to move his arm out of the way, he'll flip all the way over. Should be soon - show him/her [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:58 AM Flag
[ - ] What are the earliest signs of autism? Or the reverse -- what milestones can I look for in a young baby? I'm so nervous about this second child. I guess I feel like #1 turns out ok, and I'm very eager to know that #2 is ok, too. Thanks. 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:53 AM Flag
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www.firstsigns.org [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:57 AM Flag
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^^^Any particular reason you are concerned? Signed mom with child dx autistic at 2, now at 6 MUCH better with lots of therapy (but not quite typical), no longer dx autisitc, still has some delays [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:58 AM Flag
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I'm so glad to hear your dc is doing better. No real reason here - just that I went through the fears with dc #1 (who had some possible "signs" but no dx), so I guess I'm just eager to know there are no issues with dc #2. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:03 AM Flag
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how old is #2? who told you #1 had signs of autism? how old is #1? FWIW, my first real sign was loss of babbling skills at 9mos, personality change between 9-12 mos become unresponsive to name, never played peekaboo, never immitated funny faces, no stranger anxiety, staring spells, no appropriate play with toys, no interest in other kids. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:12 AM Flag
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#2 is very young - 5 months. Older dc didn't have the hard signs (like no social interaction), but did have things like bad eye contact, toe walking, etc. Thanks for sharing your experience. Is stranger anxiety a developmental milestone that generally points to no autism? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:14 AM Flag
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Kind of the opposite, my child never distinguished between strangers and family, would walk away with anyone. Sign that child is not properly related. That was a very scary period, esp since speech was VERY delayed. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:19 AM Flag
[ - ] 8 mo ds doesnt wave, point, or clap. Should I be worried? he does this one thing where he puts his hands together and pumps them up and down - is that his version of clapping? Should I worry? 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:48 AM Flag
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mine didn't do those things at 8 months either. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:52 AM Flag
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My 6 mo doesn't dance, sing, or speak French. Should I be worried? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:52 AM Flag
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ok, no need for that. 1st time mom here and the other babies in his little music class can do this stuff, so I'm just wondering/ sheesh [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:56 AM Flag
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That's so stupid. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:58 AM Flag
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No. They don't come at once. Pointing can happen at 13 months. I can't remember the milestones, but not to worry. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:53 AM Flag
[ - ] A friend of mine's son (8 month sold) died a few months ago. It was a horrible, tragic thing that happened. I was in touch with her after it happened. I do not live in the same city as her. (I used to.) She is a private person, and we were never very close (i.e., we never really talked about problems, etc...we usually saw each other socially with our husbands). I want to get back in touch with her and feel bad that I haven't for the last few months. I don't know what to say. I don't want to bring up her son's death whenever I contact her (I don't think she would want this) but I don't want to pretend like all is ok either. I know through other friends that she is still (obvioulsy) having a terrible time. Can anyone give me some advice on what to say to her? This is the first time I've ever dealth with this situation and I just cry when I think about what she is going through. I am pretty emotional in general and I don't want to show her that all the time because I think it would be so unhelpful for her. 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:39 AM Flag
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Can you just call her and leave her a message saying you've been thinking about her and want to reach out? This way, if she doesnt feel like talking, she doesnt really have to, but she knows youre open to her [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:42 AM Flag
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Yes, that is what I was thinking of doing...but what if she answers or when she calls me back, how do I bring this all up? Should I jsut be honest and say that I think about her all the time but don't know what to say? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:43 AM Flag
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I think thats ok. IF you do speak to her youwill obviously ask her how she's been and just go from there. Every day you wait makes it harder and more awkward. Im sure she would appreciate it if you got in touch with her. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:49 AM Flag
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ok, thanks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:50 AM Flag
[ - ] Excellent Nanny Available - Lisa has worked with my daughter since she was 3 months old. We are moving out of the city and Lisa will therefore be available immediately. She is dependable, energetic (my daughter has a better social calendar than I do) and so caring of our daughter - We are devastated to have to lose her. Lisa has 12+ years of experience with ages from newborn and up and has taken care of 1-3 children at a time, including twins. She has worked in both Brooklyn and the UWS Manhattan and knows -both areas extremely well. Please contact me (646-872-9576) or Lisa (917) 941-8980 directly for details & references. 23 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Newborn 07.08.08, 06:30 AM Flag
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how much an hour? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:43 AM Flag
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$24/hour for the first 8 hours, time and a half for each additional hour. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:48 AM Flag
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omg does she do your accounting too? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:54 AM Flag
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that was my reaction, too, although in a post below, people are paying 20 year olds $20 an hour to watch their kids. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:56 AM Flag
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That's the going rate here in NYC. Maybe it's less in flyover country. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:57 AM Flag
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no it is not [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:57 AM Flag
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oh please no one pays $24 and hour [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:00 AM Flag
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uh, not in "flyover" country here--on UES, and going rate is $12- $14 for college kids. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:00 AM Flag
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then you are a suuuuuucker [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:01 AM Flag
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"flyover country?" are you kidding? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:03 AM Flag
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I'm not! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:57 AM Flag
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^^^and I'm in NYC. We pay college-age sitters $12-14/hour [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:58 AM Flag
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but that's for babysitting - not a full time nanny. Plus most people don't pay $20 for babysitters [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:03 AM Flag
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do you really want to get into a conversation abut the diference between a babysitter and a nanny? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:05 AM Flag
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IMHO, babysitter is someone who watches dc's occasionally (evenings out, for example), and nanny is a full-time caregiver. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:08 AM Flag
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OMG - so not the going rate in NYC - that's $1320 for a 50 week! We pay almost 1/2 that for a great nanny [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:01 AM Flag
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She can't be that "great" if she's willing to settle for minimum wage. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:04 AM Flag
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wow, when did $12 become minimum wage [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:06 AM Flag
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np. Maybe not minimum, but definitely MINIMAL wage. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:08 AM Flag
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C'mon there is simply no way to justify $24/hr. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:10 AM Flag
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Um ... she's caring for your CHILDREN? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:11 AM Flag
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yup - you're still a sucker [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:14 AM Flag
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Do the math sweetie - Over $35K/year is hardly minimum wage. My point is that paying a nanny $70k/year is NOT the going rate in NYC. While some do pay that, it is definitely not the norm. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:07 AM Flag
[ - ] when to take db to dentist for first time? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:27 AM Flag
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2 yrs [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:51 AM Flag
[ - ] At what age did you stop feeding baby cereal to DB? Do they need the iron fortification until a certain age? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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Newborn 07.08.08, 06:26 AM Flag
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Stopped at 1 year w/ DS. DD never ate it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:28 AM Flag
[ - ] just found out that we are getting audited by the IRS. Anyone btdt? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:18 AM Flag
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no, but any idea why you? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:00 AM Flag
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yes, twice. YOu will survive. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 10:37 AM Flag
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Do you have anything to worry about? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 10:40 AM Flag
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yes. nothing to worry about, just hope you saved your receipts. any red flags to worry about? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 10:42 AM Flag
[ - ] my dh's ex-girlfriend/friend has always bothered me (when we first found out we were pregnant she was really sweet to me and then pitched a fit to him saying she wished she was the one who was pregnant with his baby). recently, i saw that she had called his cell phone and i listened to the message and she was giving him a whining guilt trip for not calling her often enough. i really want to tell him to stop talking to her all together because she is a fake *((**. He did call her a few days later to console her i am sure. the situation makes me crazy jealous. 27 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 05:42 AM Flag
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wow. inappropriate of her to say she wished she was pregnant, and inappropriate of you to snoop on his cell messages. have you told him how much it bothers you that they're still in touch? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 05:54 AM Flag
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np: Yeah, the fact that OP had to snoop is not a great sign, though. Her DH is hiding his relationship with this other woman to a large extent - it's bad news. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:26 AM Flag
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where do you get that? There is nothing in the post to suggest that. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:00 AM Flag
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I agree, how else would she have known what the "friend" said, if the dh hadn't told her [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:08 AM Flag
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yuk! who needs shit like that? sounds like your dh has "issues" with her. I would steer clear of it and stop obsessing over her concentrate on you and your relationship w/dh. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 05:55 AM Flag
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Come on now; Enlightened is not akin to tolerating active, emotional ties between your partner and their ex. True, it's absurd to be checking his voicemail BUT more absurd for him to maintain ANY communication w/her, when it was zero hour for severing all ties. It's better to have it all out in the open; admit that you violated his personal space.You're having a child together; right? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:45 AM Flag
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Ita. My dh has friends that are past girlfriends, but there is no way I would allow him to stay friends with someone who said that it should have been her baby. She is not his friend, she is waiting for you to break up (which, since you're married is both desperate and delusional). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:57 AM Flag
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He's still sleeping with her. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:54 AM Flag
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ITA [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:29 AM Flag
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you got it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:30 AM Flag
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You can't possibly know that. C [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 09:16 AM Flag
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Outside of business colleagues, why would ANY woman have your DH's cell phone number? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:55 AM Flag
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a dh here: there are several dozen women who are not my wife and who I don't work with who have my cell phone number. I'm not sleeping with any of them. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:01 AM Flag
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Closet gay? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:03 AM Flag
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Because I UB or because there are women who have my cell phone number who I am not sleeping with? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:05 AM Flag
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Because of the latter. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:09 AM Flag
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Really? Funny. Usually on UB it is the former. I have about a dozen that are friends we babyswap with alone. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:26 AM Flag
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you're crazy. My husband who is definitely not gay has a number of female friends who have his cell phone number. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 09:00 AM Flag
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guess you never heard of "forsake" all others - guess you just enjoy the adoration [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 08:59 AM Flag
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you're insane! Your dh isnt allowed to have any friends? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 09:00 AM Flag
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dh again: that is not what "forsake" there means. I love and honor my wife in just about everything I do. (Obey I am a little weak on...) But I never even considered that my vows meant I was not allowed to have female friends. Just as I don't expect the same (male friends) from her. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 09:25 AM Flag
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your DH is playing you and it's completely inappropriate for him to have any kind of continuing relationship with her. Why would he tell you about the conversation with her saying she wished she was pregnant (I assume she didn't say that in front of you). He is trying to make you jealous and/or still sleeping with his ex. I don't generally believe in ultimatums but this requires one: stop all contact with her or the marriage is over -- because if he doesn't, the marriage is over anyway. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:31 AM Flag
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He is sleeping with her [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:52 AM Flag
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Only a woman sleeping with a man would feel close enough to say they wished it was their baby. he is screwing her. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:52 AM Flag
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I hadn't thought about it like that, but I bet you're right... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 07:59 AM Flag
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Your DH is a very insenstive jerk - I know this because my DH is one also - these men thrive on the attention and adoration - they love the ego boost they get from these women and the thrill it brings to have these women adoring him - some say its wrong for you to check his e-mail and his cell - guess what he opened that door for you to be insecure now - tell the ex off - tell her to get her own life and own man and stay away and out of your lives!!!! He obviously doesn't have what it takes to toss her aside!!! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 08:57 AM Flag
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Its very rare that I post here anymore, but I had to log in just to tell you this. I went through the exact same thing with my dh. He had an ex who he told me all the time was 'crazy'. All the same things, voicemailsa, texts, visits in the night. He got a restraining order against her, made out like she was a crazy ex. He was sleeping with her the whole time. I hate to tell you this, but your dh cannot be friends with someone who is in love with him. She will always be able to get to him, and he will sleep with her. He needs to stop contact now, 100%, give you access to his phone, email etc and be 100% with you. He is trying ot have both of you, and Ive learned the hard way that the devoted wife sitting home with the responsibilites cannot outwin the free, single woman who knows his past, and is determined to break you up. If he is not 100% committed to cutting her out of his life, you need to leave now. It still hurts even now how stupid I was. Out of interest, did he leave her for you? Mine did, and thats another reason she has made it her lifes goal to destroy our marriage. Good Luck, but dont let this continue. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 09:16 AM Flag
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