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Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] i hate my life and the way i deal with everyday stresses. i am always angry and then feel guilty about it. i am constantly stressing about everyday issues and dont seem to be able to figure out solutions. i am always very tired too. need to figure things out. how? where should i start? 13 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:41 PM Flag
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I have been there and am there frequently. I know it is my mother in me and it drives me nuts.... On the other hand I do things that try and relax me, or I read my journal from when I was single and hated my boring life. I know it sounds lame but it works. I have everything i wanted and I still get annoyed and depressed. I know this probably doesn't help, but I just thought you should know you are not alone. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 01:08 PM Flag
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thx - it actually does help, b/c it validates what i am feeling. i noticed the only time, i feel refreshed if i go out of our tiny apartment, but i cannot be out of there all the time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 01:22 PM Flag
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I know you have probably heard this a million times, but I can not stress how important exercise is for dealing with stress and depression. You need to find an exercise you can do regularly and you need to make it a priority. Your body will fix your head if you give it lots of Oxygen and endorphins. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 01:24 PM Flag
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yes - you are right - i need to figure out and find the time to take care of myself - i wish i was more organized [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 01:29 PM Flag
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How old are your kid(s)? Do you think you could get into yoga? My friend started a yoga class out of her house and hired a babysitter to watch all the kids. It turned out to be the most wonderful thing that ever happened to my life, really. We have all become amazingly close and I now feel like I have a strong community (in a big city) of people I can trust my DD to, and my DD has made her best friends with this group. See if you can find 2 or 3 moms who need exercise, and make everyone commit to 3 or 4 days financially so you don't end up paying the babysitter bill yourself. GL! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 01:35 PM Flag
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3 and almost 5. i woh f/t and dont have the luxury of time. my dh is almost never home after work and i am handling kids/cooking/cleaning up alone. very very difficult financial situation also. i am just going through a really rough time. my family is no real help and dh's family lives far away. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 01:39 PM Flag
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For now, why don't you see if you can get a cheap double jogging stroller on craigslist and take long walks with the kids when you get home from work? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 01:47 PM Flag
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you are right - its summer - i should just go out for a walk with them every eve [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 01:52 PM Flag
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Make it a number one priority. Nothing should be more important...because it's the key to your health and happiness and therefore to your kids. GL sweetie!! There's a happy mommy in there, I promise! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 01:55 PM Flag
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you are great - thx for inspiring me :) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 01:56 PM Flag
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You know I defintely agree with you. I am the above poster not OP but I agree that excercise def helps me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 01:29 PM Flag
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MEDS NOW!!!!! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 01:41 PM Flag
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No way. Meds are not always the answer. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 01:44 PM Flag
[ - ] I have a decision to terminate an early pregnancy surgically (require that I tell my mother and have her come from far away to take me back and forth b/c my husband is away and I don't want to wait for him to return in a week and a half-- he knows and is supportive and in agreement) OR terminate with ru 486 which scares me because of the after effects, but I can do it without telling anyone. Does anyone have a comment on either choice? 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:37 PM Flag
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OP: by the way, thank you to all of those who supported me regardless of your opinion [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:38 PM Flag
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you cant take a taxi or get a friend to help? I can tell yuo just dotn really want to tell your mom, and Ive bdtd. sorry for you. sounds rough [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:39 PM Flag
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how much do you want to keep it from your mom? i'd be fine with telling mine, but i know that isnt' true for many people. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:39 PM Flag
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If you're not comfortable talking to your mother about it, does she need to know that it is a termination rather than a d&c? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:39 PM Flag
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OP: I would hate for her to think of losing a grandchild. I feel awful knowing I have to burden her even though I know she would be supportive... could I tell her that something was wrong and had to be terminated? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:42 PM Flag
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IMO you can tell her whatever you want. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:43 PM Flag
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np: great idea to tell your mom it's a miscarriage. same procedure - need the same amt of help- but no judgement. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:44 PM Flag
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I agree- thank you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:45 PM Flag
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would your mom be supportive? is there anyone that you are sure would be supportive that you could ask instead? i don't know anything about ru 486 but if it's fairly new i don't think i'd risk it - you have two other kids to care for right? would you be too sick to care for them? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:39 PM Flag
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can you talk to your dr about the companion requirement (should just be to check you out though, right?) Maybe if you wait longer they can let you out on your own and take a taxi, if that is possible. Or just tell your mom it's a d&c for some other reason. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:42 PM Flag
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OP: I appreciate that option- I did not think of that. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:44 PM Flag
[ - ] Anyone on with girls aged 8 or older? My 8 y.o. dd has just entered a really entitled, spoiled phase. I don't really think she's changed, I just think she's testing me. Basically, she's comparing all the material items her friends get and demanding them from us. I've tried talking to her but I don't seem to be getting through to her. Yesterday I told her if she complained about one more thing, I was going to remove everything from her room that was NOT a necessity - leaving her with a bed, pillow, blanket and clothes. But I don't want to be so punitive or threatening. I want her to be appreciative b/c her life is great. Am I living in la la land? 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:36 PM Flag
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i think wanting her to be appreciative is maybe asking too much at this age. but its completely reasonable to expect her to stop whining and accept your family's policies about buying stuff. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:45 PM Flag
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Sounds like she is pushing your buttons, and getting attention that way. Have you tried just ignoring the behavior? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:47 PM Flag
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I would definitely take it away. She is 8 and will not respond well to adult like tactics. show her that you are the boss and that she needs to be respectful and appreciative of what she does have. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 01:03 PM Flag
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I say the same thing with my 8 yo ds. I just want him to grateful, and frankly, I don't think it's asking too much. Just curious if your dd is in private school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 01:06 PM Flag
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no - we're in public but in a very affluent suburb (not nyc.) we truly are less wealthy than most of her friends and simply choose to spend less than the others. we moved here for the schools (4 kids and private tuition would kill us) but so much comes with the good schools that i hadn't prepared myself for. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 01:21 PM Flag
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take one thing away every time she complains. or find a way to show her how much less other people have. my parents always made sure that I played with kids with more and with less so that I didn't get that "but everyone else has" attitude. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 01:10 PM Flag
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op: i'm not sure that losing one thing at a time would be very effective. if i'm going that route, i think i'm more likely to take everything away for the dramatic effect and then allow her to earn stuff back. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 01:28 PM Flag
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i don't mean one little thing at a time, i meant one significant thing at a time. i think the dramatic a punishment for an 8yo is a bit much. of course, if you take away her 10 favorite items and it has 0 impact on her complaining, then maybe you DO have to go that route. I just find that big threats tend to be empty bc you don't really want to carry them out and small threats are easier to execute. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 01:35 PM Flag
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good point. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 01:36 PM Flag
[ - ] Thinking of doing a beach house rental instead of our usual nice beach hotel vacation with our 3 yo. DH and I enjoy cooking, but we are still hesitant about going to some random house for a week, this would be the first time we do this. Is it better than hotel? 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:36 PM Flag
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I like it better than a hotel, but I live in a very small apt so having the space is a big plus. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:39 PM Flag
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yes waaaay better than a hotel. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:41 PM Flag
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I find a house much better than a hotel with 2.5 yo. Gives dh and I the opporutnity to still function in the evenings and get her to bed on time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:42 PM Flag
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We think so! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:42 PM Flag
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Yes, and no. Love the space, being able to bbq and letting dc go in and out without me having to go along. But, it doesn't always feel like a vacation. You still need to prepare meals, clean up after everyone, etc. I try to combine some hotel and some house time during a vacation, to get teh best of both worlds. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:47 PM Flag
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I've got 3 available Summer weeks near beach. http://www.simonecolina.com/quad/ [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 01:20 PM Flag
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I prefer having a house BUT I also make sure we go out for meals. The times we've rented a house and eaten all our meals in, I've felt like I had no vacation whatsoever. Last summer we ate breakfast and lunch in the house (or by the pool) and ate almost every dinner out. Some nights we made the kid's favs for dinner and DH and I got carry out from nice restaurants and ate after the kids went to bed. It was actually very romantic. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 01:24 PM Flag
[ - ] yummmmy pinkberry 0 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 07.15.08, 12:33 PM Flag
[ - ] When do I give the list of schools to the ERB office? Do I do it now or after I hand in my application? DD took them in the Spring. Thanks. 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Preschool/Kids 07.15.08, 12:33 PM Flag
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I gave ERB the list when I signed dd up for the test. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:53 PM Flag
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Thanks but I did not know at that time what schools we would be applying for and now I do. Anyone? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 01:41 PM Flag
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OR Contact the ERB and advise them of your list now--one less thing to do in the fall. The schools download the score and report after they receive application. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 03:20 PM Flag
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Thank you! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 04:37 PM Flag
[ - ] Need nanny advice - I recently reduced my nanny's hrs from FT to PT b/c dc is in school more now. My nanny is open about needing FT work and is looking for a FT position. I have asked her to try to give me 2 wks notice if she finds a new position, but she can't guarantee this. Should I just find someone to be our permanent PT sitter? I would feel bad for my nanny if I let her go before she finds something else, but then I don't want to have to scramble to find someone new when she gets a new job. She told me it took her 7 months to find a new job the last time this happened (she only searches thru her network of nanny friends). WWYD? 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:21 PM Flag
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Can you help her find a position? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:23 PM Flag
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Yes, I suppose I could place an ad for her on Craig's List or something. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:26 PM Flag
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also ask around. someone you know might need someone [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:26 PM Flag
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thing is that my nanny is ok, but I would have a hard time raving about her. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:27 PM Flag
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because? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:38 PM Flag
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she's generally responsible and cares about my dc, but she's not wonderful with the interaction/stimulation part. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:46 PM Flag
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gotcha. for a lot of people responsible is the most important thing. so aomeone that has a new baby might consider her a good choice. anyway, i'd ask around. its nice for her and lets you know when she's leaving. and possbily control it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:47 PM Flag
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ok, thanks [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 01:06 PM Flag
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why don't you post at your dc's school and e-mail your friends. you might make someone else very happy! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:28 PM Flag
[ - ] So my 14 lb 6 mo sleeps through the night when he is swaddled, but is getting too big for the velcroed swaddle sack. Any thoughts on other swaddling alternatives because he wakes himself if he is left unwrapped. Thanks! 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:15 PM Flag
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maybe it's time for him to learn how to sleep without being swaddled [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:15 PM Flag
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He's a triplet and the above post applies to 2 of the 3. Cut us some slack until they at least all make it through the night. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:17 PM Flag
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Im sorry to say this because I know its not what you want to hear - but thats too big to be swaddled [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:16 PM Flag
[ - ] Anyone been to the Statue of Liberty lately? Ds has asked to go there. We've lived in NYC for years, but have never been. Any tips for when to go? How to get there? 20 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 07.15.08, 12:13 PM Flag
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there are boats from the Battery but i'd think this one through. you cannot go up in the statue, basically its a visit to the island, adn the security to get onthe boats is murder. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:17 PM Flag
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You really don't know how to get to the SoL and you've lived here for years? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:19 PM Flag
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I have a vague idea that there's a ferry you catch at South Ferry. Why is this such a strange notion for you? I've never been there. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:22 PM Flag
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you've never had out of town visitors who wanted to go there? tourists who stopped you on the street, etc? I've lived here for years as well and never been, but I do know how to go. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:23 PM Flag
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nope and nope. My out of town visitors (mostly relatives) don't do touristy stuff. If anyone stopped me on the street, I would tell them I don't know. I'm not exactly going to go research how to get there in the unlikely event I'm stopped on the street. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:24 PM Flag
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ok. it just seemed very strange to me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:26 PM Flag
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np: Native NYer. Never been. No idea how to get there. Also never been to Ellis Island. (I'm hoping to chaperon a field trip in the next year or two.) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:38 PM Flag
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OP: Thank you! I know I'm not the only NYer, native or otherwise, who hasn't been there and doesn't know how to get there. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:47 PM Flag
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Take the Staten Is Ferry - it goes right by it, is free, and you don't have to deal with the tourists and major security on the Statue/Ellis Is ferry [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:20 PM Flag
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ITA, or do the one-hour version of the Circle Line. We did this last summer. We booked tickets online, picked them up at the Battery, no lines, and had a lovely cruise around lower Manhattan. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:26 PM Flag
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maybe we'll do this. Then we will be able to see the waterfalls too. Do you remember how much the tickets were? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:26 PM Flag
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not too much from what I recall--maybe 15 for us and 8ish for dc? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:27 PM Flag
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ok, sounds like a plan. Thanks! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:28 PM Flag
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have fun! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:32 PM Flag
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it is a nightmare....long lines to get tix, long lines to get on the boat, long lines to reboard when it's time to leave the island...take the staten island ferry round trip...or ride The Beast or something more 'organized'......unless your dc really wants to get on the island right up close .......I wouldn't do it (but I'm an admitted party pooper) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:20 PM Flag
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^oh yeah and the security lines..... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:21 PM Flag
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thanks, this is very helpful info. I'd heard something about long lines. Do you know if there are long lines early in the morning? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:23 PM Flag
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I think so...if you have two adults, one can get in ticket line while other holds place in boat line..if I had to do it, I'd use this strategy and then aim to get in line to return very quickly. I've heard nightmare stories about class trips where they all had to have bags scanned....it's ridiculous now, and sad at the same time [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:31 PM Flag
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ok, thanks. It would be more fun to actually stand next to the SOL, but not sure if it's worth the hassle. Might just do the circle line or SI Ferry. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:45 PM Flag
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PSA: since 9/11 you have not been allowed to go any higher than the pedestal. US Parks Dept has said they are looking for security consultant/company to hire who would help them open up to crown again. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:41 PM Flag
[ - ] what are good city or government jobs? 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 11:58 AM Flag
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White or blue collar? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:00 PM Flag
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white collar [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:08 PM Flag
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Manhattan DA's office is well-respected, though you make a lot less than you would in private practice [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:00 PM Flag
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but then you could go back into private practice and make a bundle of money [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:06 PM Flag
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what do you want to do? There is a lot of variety. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:20 PM Flag
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well im an admin asst. now , but im looking for better benefits and better pay, am at 36k now. i dont mind working up , even postal jobs i was thinking..? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:24 PM Flag
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haven't you heard of the phrase "going postal"? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:28 PM Flag
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op: lmao, i think ive done that too many times. except the shooting part [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:41 PM Flag
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School secretary makes almost $50K with all NYC benefits including pension. They're pedagogical jobs so under UFT contract. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.16.08, 01:01 AM Flag
[ - ] Anyone with 5 dcs in NYC? Seriously .... 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 07.15.08, 11:54 AM Flag
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I know one woman with 3 boys, twin girls and is pregnant with #6. I don't know how she does it. I don't think she has help either, but maybe has family around [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:22 PM Flag
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god bless her...we can barely manage one (and she's an easy kid). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:27 PM Flag
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she usually dresses the boys all in the same outfits....and the girls alike too. I think it saves her sanity! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:32 PM Flag
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jewish? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:34 PM Flag
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nope, but you are right, the orthodox women do it all the time [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 01:33 PM Flag
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I know 2 families - one had twins as #s 4 & 5 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:31 PM Flag
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many many hassidic families. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.15.08, 12:36 PM Flag
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