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Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] I went off the pill last month, but I'm not really "trying" yet. So why am I still disappointed that I got my period? 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:09 PM Flag
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having unprotected sex is trying. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:10 PM Flag
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But it's not trying in the sense that I'm not like, "Oh, I'm ovulating! Let's get it on!" [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:10 PM Flag
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right, but you're hoping, aren't you? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:17 PM Flag
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I guess so. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:18 PM Flag
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it sounds to me like you're really hoping it will just happen naturally without having to go through the ttc stuff--i was the same so i hope it works out for you! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:19 PM Flag
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Probably! Thanks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:22 PM Flag
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IMO you are either actively preventing or you want to be pregnant [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:55 PM Flag
[ - ] Boring! 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:07 PM Flag
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i'm better than you [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:08 PM Flag
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so say something interesting [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:08 PM Flag
[ - ] I'd like to take 5 yo and 3 yo for a nature walk over the weekend, weather permitting. any day trips from manhattan to recommend where we don't need a car? I'm thinking a state park or similar near a RR stain? bus station? TIA 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 05.22.08, 05:07 PM Flag
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don't laugh -- but check out Staten Island's Green Belt... You can take the ferry and then the bus.... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:08 PM Flag
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do you know what bus? my kids would love, love the ferry [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:10 PM Flag
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we're going to do the ferry this weekend. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:11 PM Flag
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not sure -- i haven't lived there in 27 yrs... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:11 PM Flag
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ny botanical garden is great. right off metro north, 20 min from gct. they have lots of paths near the bronx river, plus they have restaurant, bathroom, kids' stuff, etc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:08 PM Flag
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thanks, I'll check it out. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:10 PM Flag
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we ended up joining-we go a lot. rose garden in summer is beautiful. plus there is some sculpture thing opening this weekend. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:12 PM Flag
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beautiful setup. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:11 PM Flag
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can also go to brooklyn botanical garden [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:15 PM Flag
[ - ] Dh will say things in passing like "sure, you sketchy whore" or "alright, slut" and he acts like he is joking... but it is very upsetting. I explained to him that it would be like me saying "okay, fat, loser..." or something of the like, but he still says it. It hurts my feelings. 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:06 PM Flag
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there is truth in every joke [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:06 PM Flag
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op: well then its really hurtful [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:07 PM Flag
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Not funny. Plus he shouldn't do it in front of the dcs. I would prefer sure, dear. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:08 PM Flag
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Eh, I call DH a pussy all the time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:06 PM Flag
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Tell him you don't like it, and you don't want your kids to hear it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:07 PM Flag
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i wouldn't stand for it and let him know. no way to talk to the woman he loves or the mother of his children. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:08 PM Flag
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Passive aggressive A-hole!! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:09 PM Flag
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That's not really passive. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:10 PM Flag
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OP: I agree and am pissed.. if you have something to say to me- then just say it. And if it is that you think I am a whore- then you are wrong and shouldn't have married me!! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:10 PM Flag
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don't give him that power over you. tell him to stop, end of story. if he said it again, i'd tell him to stop and then walk away from the situation. don't even feed into his crap. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:17 PM Flag
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did this just start or did he always do it? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:17 PM Flag
[ - ] 20 yo dd wants a summer job working with children (nanny, babysitter, etc). Mendham, Tewksbury, Far Hills parts of NJ - - any ideas on where to advertise? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:05 PM Flag
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Craig's List. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:06 PM Flag
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is there a Y or the preschools bulletin board? COffee shops, ped offices, the library [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:07 PM Flag
[ - ] has the text gotten smaller? 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:05 PM Flag
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No, they changed it back to VERDANA! (It was briefly Helvetica) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:08 PM Flag
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a font expert -- i like you! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:09 PM Flag
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i think so -- i liked the bigger font... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:08 PM Flag
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It wasn't so much size as style. This is back to the font we used to have on this site. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:10 PM Flag
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this is good because you can get a ton more on the page [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:18 PM Flag
[ - ] music question: dc love Father Goose ... any recs for other kids reggae music they might enjoy? ages 3 and 5 ... TIA 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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Toddler 05.22.08, 05:04 PM Flag
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what, you don't think bob marley is appropriate for preschoolers? ;) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:20 PM Flag
[ - ] repost from earlier: is it ok to continue w/acupuncture throughout my first trimester? just found out i'm pg. OB says ok but want some corroboration...Did your OB say it was ok too? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:03 PM Flag
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my OB said acupuncture is fine but don't take any herbs [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:04 PM Flag
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OB was fine with acupuncture, not fine with herbs/tinctures. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:04 PM Flag
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that's what my dr said... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:09 PM Flag
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as long as your acupuncturist knows you're pg [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:05 PM Flag
[ - ] I hate my work! 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:03 PM Flag
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why? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:04 PM Flag
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I'm tired of making decisions all day. I want something to go right. I hate the stress, the being tired, the feeling like I am the most incapable in the room, I hate leaving DD 4 days a week... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:07 PM Flag
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i wish i had a job! i know it's hard to leave dd but honestly working is like a vacation compared to sah! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:31 PM Flag
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sometimes, sometimes not [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:44 PM Flag
[ - ] ewwww kris kardashian started dating her 30 yr old dh when she was 18??? 34 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:03 PM Flag
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bruce jenner? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:04 PM Flag
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no, robert [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:04 PM Flag
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You mean Robert K? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:05 PM Flag
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yeah, that would be her dh at that young an age. but he was 30. kinda eww.. major eww [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:05 PM Flag
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Well, that would explain why Kim got married at 19. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:07 PM Flag
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kourtney strangely enough has never been married, at 28 (that we know of) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:08 PM Flag
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She has that loser, white trash boyfriend though. LOVE his gold chain. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:09 PM Flag
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he is SOOOO LAMMME. and like 6 yrs younger than her! lammme [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:10 PM Flag
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That's how she's raising her daughters as well [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:05 PM Flag
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lol [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:06 PM Flag
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and do they just live at home for the show or do they actually live at home? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:06 PM Flag
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Only the twins live there. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:07 PM Flag
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the baby girls aren't twins [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:08 PM Flag
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Um, yes they are.... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:09 PM Flag
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i remember distinctly an episode that ended with a tape of one of the girl's birth.. and she wasn't a twin [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:11 PM Flag
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You are wrong. Go to wikipedia if you don't believe me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:11 PM Flag
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wiki confirms, born 1997 and 1995... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:13 PM Flag
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np: HA! take that [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:16 PM Flag
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then why is one older than they other? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:11 PM Flag
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no, they aren't [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:18 PM Flag
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Sadly, I watched the E! True Hollywood Story and can confirm that they are. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:10 PM Flag
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but i saw the birthing tape of one.. and she was born alone.... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:10 PM Flag
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No, they were both born in that tape, idiot. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:11 PM Flag
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first of all, watch how you talk to me. secondly, there was one db on that tape that i saw [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:12 PM Flag
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one was born in 1997, the other in 1995. YOU ARE WRONG [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:13 PM Flag
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ok.. idiot.. but they are not twins. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Keeping_Up_With_The_Kardashians [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:14 PM Flag
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don't you feel stupid. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:15 PM Flag
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How did you see the birthing tape (ewwwww) of one of the Jenner girls? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:15 PM Flag
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they showed it on the show, and she is older than her sister-- a sister who is NOT her twin [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:15 PM Flag
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everyoen but rob has a bedroom in the house, though [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:08 PM Flag
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Is that a good thing? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:10 PM Flag
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no, it's a weird thing [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:11 PM Flag
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The youngest girls are NOT twins. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:14 PM Flag
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THANK YOU. and i just got called an idiot for saying this. good god i hate UB. they were born separately two years apart, how this makes them TWINS is biologically impossible [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:15 PM Flag
[ - ] Has anyone heard of Dr Iris Vardy for orthodontia? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:01 PM Flag
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I went to high school with her. I would send my kids to her should they ever need braces. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:10 PM Flag
[ - ] when can you do a pg test with accurate results? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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TTC 05.22.08, 05:00 PM Flag
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When you miss your period. Although I got a positive 3 days before. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:02 PM Flag
[ - ] what are some areas in nj that are good family-friendly. good schools and diverse community. commutable to the city. i know - lots of requirements. 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 05.22.08, 05:00 PM Flag
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ridgewood isn't that diverse, but it's all of those other things. river edge is nice and not too $$$. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:01 PM Flag
[ - ] my neighbor is quasi sancti about organic eating, etc, but then all she feeds ds are like chikasauruses and all this processed "natural" food (oxymoron?). i'm like.. why can't you feed him something not from a box? 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:00 PM Flag
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time [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:01 PM Flag
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yeah, but then how is she psuedo sancti about natural food? clearly other chicken fingers moms are in time crunches, too [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:02 PM Flag
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ha! My sister is like that (although she is not sancti) but she feeds the kids mostly vegetarian stuff and grillers by the truck load. Funny [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:05 PM Flag
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mmm grillers. i love grillers. BUT i will say i'm not going to think grillers and chix are a substitute for good old fashioned fresh food [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:07 PM Flag
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exactly! They are fine once in awhile but I swear her kids live on them! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:08 PM Flag
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i honestly think people get tricked into the packaging. the wholistic colors made them feel good-- it's still a processed packaged food. sure it's not meat, but cookies aren't meat either [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:09 PM Flag
[ - ] My nanny decided to drop a bomb on me tonight: apparently, the $18/hour I pay her for 2 kids (though I'm home 50% of the time and my older dc is at school or in various after school activities almost every minute my nanny is here) is not enough $$$ for her and that she knows of people hiring "on 95th and Park" and "85th and Columbus" $750/week on the books for 45 hours. (Mind you, that's barely more than we're paying her.) I feel held up by her, and betrayed. So we got in a huge fight and I told her that if she leaves us -- and my special needs child -- for $.70/hour or thereabouts, without even giving us a chance to match it, then I will be forced to withhold a good recommendation; I'll have to tell the new person that she's a good nanny but will likely leave you for the person in the park who offers her $.50 /more. Am I wrong here? 21 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Toddler 05.22.08, 04:58 PM Flag
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screw her. tell her to go to 95th and park -- she might just be bluffing... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:00 PM Flag
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ITA. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:00 PM Flag
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Find someone else. Do NOT let your nanny extort money from you. I'm really sorry. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:00 PM Flag
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not wrong at all. she's awful. i'd fire her if she doesn't leave [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:01 PM Flag
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you said the right thing, though my heart strings were tugged by the SN child. before then i was indifferent [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:01 PM Flag
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np: I was merely annoyed at the nanny until that. Now it really seems like extortion, just awful - I might have fired her right there. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:02 PM Flag
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OP: Thanks. She is a great nanny, and came recommended by my son's OT because of her work for 6 years with a SN child. She knows we need her and we feel we pay her fairly, and yet I feel like she just wants an "easier" job even if it doesn't pay much more. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:13 PM Flag
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$18/hr for 45 hours is $810, you are apying her better than those offers so I'm confused about the nanny's math skills. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:13 PM Flag
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op: Nanny said she knows of a job (hasn't interviewed for it; her friend told her about it) that pays $750/week NET for 45 hours. That comes out to $16.62/hour net and more than $18/hour gross. We pay her what amounts to less than that, but it costs us nearly $19/hour to have her on the books. Complicated. But her net is less for us in part b/c she's only 35 hours/week. If we found a way to pay her for 45/week the hourly difference would be negligible. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:15 PM Flag
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i'm not sure what to think. first of all, i think $18/hour for two dcs is really high. unless your special needs child is really special needs and requires more work or special experience. Secondly, it was very unprofessional of her to broach the subject this way. You shouldn't ask for a raise b/c you heard someoen else is getting that much. You should be able to say "i deserve a raise because of x and y, and i know that this is a reasonable amount to ask for b/c i know of people getting hired at that rate". But i don't always expect nannies to be very professional in how they ask for raises. many of them are not professionals. (same as many people hiring nannies aren't really experienced at hiring or managing). Bottom line, i think you are taking this personally and it is really just business. If you think her demands are fair or warranted, see if you can meet them. If not, then just tell her you aren't going to. She knows herself that if she leaves you high and dry she's not going to get a good reference. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:14 PM Flag
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18 an hour is not that high, i started my nanny at that for two kids (3y and 6mo) but we are in burbs and she drives [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:28 PM Flag
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She would be so finished with me after that. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:15 PM Flag
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I'm on 94 and Park and I'm NOT hiring!! I'll be a UB vigilante and scout the 'hood and tell everyone not to hire her!! (On a more serious note, who knows what she is thinking?! The question is: do you want to match? Will you be able to get past this? Maybe it's time to cut your ties with her.) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:15 PM Flag
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:) That's the thing. She's amazing with my kids and I trust her completely, but this really has me thinking that maybe we need to part ways b/c of the tension now. I was in tears when she left. My youngest son (just turned 2) was then crying her name out b/c he knew she and I were upset. To the poster above, my son has special needs, but he's actually easier at 4 than my NT 2-year-old is. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:17 PM Flag
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np: Ditto about my SN child being easier than my hell-raising toddler. Came as such a shock - right? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:19 PM Flag
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Vigilante poster from above: sounds like a very tough situation and I don't have much advice. I'd probably have a hard time getting past this (which is why I asked) -- but I also realize that it's hard to find an amazing nanny. How did you leave things? What do you want to happen? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:22 PM Flag
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Vigilante poster again: She may want an "easier" job...but she may also find that another family is a lot harder (frankly, you sound nice and level-headed and realistic)! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:33 PM Flag
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I totally understand your situation. I would not want to offer it to her because of how badly and meanly she handled the situation. It's kind of hard to forget something like that (unless she comes back and apologizes and explains that she came at it the wrong way and just approached it more professionally.) to me, this situation tells you a lot about her (and also sounds like she is quietly resentful -- I was a PA and was very quietly resentful -- so maybe it's time to let go.) She may be great with the kids, but it is still a job to her. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:29 PM Flag
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i'm the poster above. i really think you should not take this personally. She asked for a raise, which she is entitled to do. You can decide whether or not to give it. I also suspect she doesn't have another job lined up. I think it just hammered home the idea that she can leave at any time. But you'll manage. You'll be fine. And if you are paying $18/hour, you'll easily be able to find someone to replace her. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:33 PM Flag
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I pay $15/hr for one child and she does zero housework. So I guess from this post my nanny is well paid??? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:24 PM Flag
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uh, no. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:29 PM Flag
[ - ] Curious to hear how other moms would handle this ... there is a boy in my 5 yo ds' class who is not very nice to ds. He has gotten in trouble for biting ds once and today was pushing ds on the playground. I also know this boy has gotten into trouble at school for hitting and biting other children. I have told my ds if this boy bothers him, he should tell him to stop -- and if that doesn't work, to tell the teacher. Ds has not really complained about this boy, but the boy is sort of a ringleader in the class and has a lot of friends. I am curious if I should be doing more ... FWIW, the mom of the boy apologized profusely to me for the biting (though then she tried to tell me it was somehow my son's fault) and told she me grounded him for a week by banning video games and Power Ranger TV. When I asked the teacher about the other boy she said she was watching out for my son, that he was fine and that the other boy was working on improving his behavior. 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 05.22.08, 04:58 PM Flag
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I would talk to teachers and work out something [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:00 PM Flag
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i can understand a toddler biting, but a 5yo? something's off with that. what did hte teacher say? have you spoken to him or her? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:01 PM Flag
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The teacher said that she was watching out for my son, that he was not being bullied and that the other boy is working on improving his behavior. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:01 PM Flag
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sounds like the teacher is just covering her ass. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:11 PM Flag
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so do you think I should follow it up with the mom? the teacher? wait until ds tells me there's a problem? my mom always tells this story about how this boy bullied her when she was about 6 and her mother walked up to the little boy and said "I'm Jane's mother. I'm a mean mother. And you'd better stop pushing Jane or you will have to deal with me." Bullying stopped immediately. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:15 PM Flag
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^^I just don't want to be too laid back about it. There's got to be a happy medium somewhere between these approaches. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:16 PM Flag
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things have changed a lot since your mom was a kid [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:16 PM Flag
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no kidding! that's what I told my mom! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:17 PM Flag
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i think you've done what you can. just try to keep an eye on it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:14 PM Flag
[ - ] Help, filling out w-4 for pt job, have a dh who works ft and one child. what total number of allowances should i claim? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 04:57 PM Flag
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irs.gov has a calculator for this [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 04:59 PM Flag
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thanks [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.22.08, 05:02 PM Flag
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