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Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] Ok, what about 118th/RSD? Decent area? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 06.08.08, 06:29 PM Flag
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That's much better. Columbia U. area, and lots of professors live over there. Pretty views [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:30 PM Flag
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Yes, that's better. But be aware that there has been a real problem with crime in that area in the last 1/2 year. I go to Columbia and we have received some security posts that have been pretty scary. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:30 PM Flag
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eek, it's a ground floor apt (in doorman bldg). It's only for 2-3 mo, but clearly irrel crime-wise. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:32 PM Flag
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If there's a doorman, it's better than no doorman [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:32 PM Flag
[ - ] Would you choose to live in a nicer home in Edgemont v. not as nice home in Rye? 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:28 PM Flag
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Edgemont [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:29 PM Flag
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Because you like Edgemont or because you like a nicer house? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:29 PM Flag
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A little of both. Edgemont is quite nice. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:30 PM Flag
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Do you live there or near by? We've read about a lot of home burglaries lately and that makes me very nervous. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:32 PM Flag
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I haven't heard about the burglaries. I live in Hastings. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:32 PM Flag
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edgemont. more centralized location, closer to city. if you like being near the water, though, rye. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:32 PM Flag
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But she wouldn't be near the water probably if she's looking at a not so nice home in Rye. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:33 PM Flag
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What about the whole unincorporate part of town of Greenburgh business? Wonder about the implications on taxes, police, etc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:34 PM Flag
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If these are the only two choices, then I would pick Rye. Nicer village. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:32 PM Flag
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Unless you can walk to it, how important is a town's village? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:35 PM Flag
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I live in a village and I would not trade it for the world. Don't need to drive all the time, and actually better sense of community. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:37 PM Flag
[ - ] What's 118th/madison like? looking at a 3 mo sublet up there.... 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 06.08.08, 06:24 PM Flag
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Hmmm. Not great [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:25 PM Flag
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Not so great. I go by there nearly every day. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:28 PM Flag
[ - ] UGH. Why does it take me back to the log in page when I try to reply? 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 06.08.08, 06:24 PM Flag
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I was just having the same problem! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:25 PM Flag
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This only happens to me every few posts, but it's annoying as hxll [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:25 PM Flag
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Yes - only on some as I could just reply to you. It's usually my second reply. For example - if you respond to this I bet I won't be able to respond. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:26 PM Flag
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Let's try [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:27 PM Flag
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Hmmmm... it worked. Of course it didn't work on an "important" post. Not that I don't value you *greatly*. :) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:28 PM Flag
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lol [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:28 PM Flag
[ - ] what did you do? why did it end? we are going to counselling but what else? does it work? i just don't know. and my kids are really young. i wonder if it wouldn't be better to just end it now when they won't even remember what life was like before... 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:24 PM Flag
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This is going to sound odd, but don't think about the kids. Think about yourself and whether you are committed to seeing it out. The kids will follow you no matter what [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:31 PM Flag
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I don't know what I think. I don't even feel anger. I am just so desperately sad. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:33 PM Flag
[ - ] Favorite kind of dog 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:23 PM Flag
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Swiss mountain hound--love them! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:23 PM Flag
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My DDs love all dogs but are particularly entranced by yellow or chocolate labs [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:24 PM Flag
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mutts, the bigger the better. ours thinks she is a 70 lb lapdog. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:28 PM Flag
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Big dogs. I have those little yippy Paris Hilton type dogs. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:31 PM Flag
[ - ] My husband cheated on me. I caught him. Anyone on who got through this and stayed together? I don't see how I can do it. 29 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:20 PM Flag
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Well, to even give it a shot, he would have to agree to stop seeing the other woman and to go into intensive therapy with you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:21 PM Flag
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I gave it a real try. But my marriage ended four years later. Sorry for your pain. I hear you [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:21 PM Flag
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what did you do? why did it eventually end? do you feel it would have been better to call it quits earlier? i am so lost. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:26 PM Flag
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The usual stuff. Sought couples counseling, really tried to work on it, and it ended because he lied about ending things and I found out and felt doubly betrayed. The second time was worse than the first. Like dull knives in the eyes. I hope you don't have to experience that [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:28 PM Flag
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Oh God. I am so sorry. I don't think I could take that. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:30 PM Flag
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give yourself time. don't even worry about down the road right now. figure out what you need now. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:27 PM Flag
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i have no idea what i need now. i need to hide under the covers for about a month. but that's clearly not an option. other than that, i have no clue. i can't stop crying. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:28 PM Flag
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do you need to be alone. do you need to get a room somewhere and cry for a bit. do you need to get out of the house. are you around dh all the time now? It's a long long process. But give yourself some time. How long ago did you find out? At a certain point, you'll decide whether or not you want to continuing trying or not. It'll still hurt, but you'll get to a point where you'll know one way or the other. You'll prob go back and forth a lot too, but then you always hit those decision making times. dh and I are about 1 yr and 3 months out from a similar thing. it is not easy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:32 PM Flag
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I found out last night. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:35 PM Flag
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did he tell you or did you find out? it does take time. and you need to take at least a day, or an evening to help you ground yourself and figure out what you want to do next. perhaps try therapy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:36 PM Flag
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I am replying here because it won't let me reply below. I saw them. He denied it. She confessed it a day later. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:43 PM Flag
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how did you catch him? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:32 PM Flag
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They were in our apt. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:36 PM Flag
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how many kids do you have? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:37 PM Flag
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WTF? Were your kids with you? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:38 PM Flag
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They were here. It was late. It is sick. The kids didn't see anything. He tried to lie about it (weren't doing much but still). She finally told me what happened last night. She was a friend. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:40 PM Flag
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what a situation. i'm sorry. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:41 PM Flag
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there is no going back from that. You will never trust him again [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:43 PM Flag
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ita, and btdt. I posted below. I know I could never trust dh again. plus he's shown no remorse. I am shocked by how little I really knew him, and how much I want him out of my life. But there's dc to take care of, so he'll never be gone totally. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:55 PM Flag
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I just don't want to be anywhere near him. I don't want to talk to him or hear his voice. Trust and love or any sort of relationship just seem like an utter impossibility. And I don't even feel anger now, but I know that will come eventually and when that happens, I just don't think we will make it through. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 07:08 PM Flag
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sorry to post so much later- but I know how you feel. I thought that we would, though, because when it happened I viewed it as a turning point, I really thought he'd snap out of it and realize what a huge mistake he'd made. Turns out, he doesn't see it as a mistake at all. He still wants the family thing but he completely ruined our relationship. I know that it's for the best for the two of us, but it sucks that he destroyed his kids' family for his own needs. I bet he'll turn back at some point but we'll be long gone. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 08:01 PM Flag
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dump him and the friend- IMMEDIATELY! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:42 PM Flag
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OMG, I'm so sorry. I'd throw the bastard out and change the locks. Really, this is such a disrespect to your whole family that he would do it there. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:42 PM Flag
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That's the worst part. What I want to do is pack up and leave my apt. with my kids and never come back. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:45 PM Flag
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Consult with a lawyer. Don't give him an inch, protect yourself. I suspect someone who would do this could do anything. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:46 PM Flag
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DON'T LEAVE. I know exactly how you feel -- getting away from what feels so toxic and destructive. But the smartest thing to do is to fight to keep your focus away from him and on yourself, the rest of your life, your dcs. It will feel impossible, but try to will yourself to keep up your own life, right where you are. Make HIM have to do all of the moving/changing/losing. Fake it til you make it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.09.08, 05:52 AM Flag
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np: mine did this with a friend, but I didn't catch them the way you did. I caught emails. I feel for you, I was you a year ago. It's still hard, but my dh made it easier by being unwilling to try therapy or to stop seeing the woman socially. I have no doubt that I want him out and I'm biding my time. gl to you, if I were a praying woman I'd pray for you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:52 PM Flag
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I can give you the long-term view. My ex cheated on me, we stayed together. It took me ten years to get over the anger and the betrayal, but I really did. I think I did though by caring less about him. We had a lot of good years, a lot of fun with our children, and broke up a few days short of our 26th anniversary. My advice is to not invest the time and sacrifice of youth and idealism that getting over it requires. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.09.08, 07:24 AM Flag
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i think you need to find the reason he cheated. is he a sociopath that has repeatedly cheated. or was this a bad judgment call that is salvageable with therapy and a recommitment to the relationship. don't do anything rash until you understand your husband and his motivations better [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.09.08, 06:34 PM Flag
[ - ] DH went out of the country for almost 4 weeks on business and I stayed home with the 2 yr old. He brought me a book from the popular read section--could have gotten at the airport didn't ask. I am not trying to be greedy, but shouldn't he have brought me something a little better?? 15 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:19 PM Flag
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I wasn't aware that there was a business trip return gift policy in place. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:19 PM Flag
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That's an interesting perspective. I wouldn't expect a gift from dh just because he had to travel for work. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:21 PM Flag
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np: I wouldn't expect it either, but I think I'd be pissed if he thought he needed to get me a gift but then was lazy and picked up a book at the airport store. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:23 PM Flag
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does that make sense? he thought about buying you a gift, but you'd be mad bc although you didn't expect it, it wasn't good enough? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:24 PM Flag
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It makes sense in my head. It's like he bought something begrudgingly. It seems so passive-aggressive. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:26 PM Flag
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Whoa--you've got issues [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:26 PM Flag
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Maybe. But lucky for me, my DH would wouldn't do this. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:27 PM Flag
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ITA. I know from my own work travel experience that buying gifts is often the last thing on my mind. Cut the guy some slack. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:26 PM Flag
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I would have been delighted with a gift, but I wouldn't expect one [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:23 PM Flag
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I agree with you, especially if he was in another country. A little local present would have been more thoughtful. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:27 PM Flag
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Was in similar boat, got no gift (but to be fair, got flowers every week). Take what you can get, woman! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:28 PM Flag
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My husband did a similar thing recently (though he was gone for 1 week--not 4). He did splurge on a unique gift for DS, which I thought was important, but it would have been nice if he'd dedicated even some of the same level of interest to me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:29 PM Flag
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np... i think that's what it is. why think about a gift but not bother putting thought into it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:34 PM Flag
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Yes. My dh usually brings me something small if he travels out of the country, but it's usually speicifc to the country. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:34 PM Flag
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You're an ingrate. You are lucky he thought of you at all. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:50 PM Flag
[ - ] i need a fathers day gift for dh (1st fathers day) 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:18 PM Flag
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sex, lots of it [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:31 PM Flag
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GC for a massage, get a babysitter and have a night out without DC [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:33 PM Flag
[ - ] We purchased our first apt. this year but have nothing left over so can't buy any furniture and need to put things away. I don't regret our purchase but I'm so frustrated that we are still in boxes after a few months here. Since we own now we want to do things the way we really want it and not just a quick fix. Anyone BTDT? How long were you still in boxes? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Toddler 06.08.08, 06:18 PM Flag
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I'd buy some cheap storage furniture from Ikea and target and sell it on CL later. Living in boxes is awful. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:19 PM Flag
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Don't worry, it happens to nearly everyone. You don't want to decorate your apt. in one swoop anyway because that always looks to matchy-matchy. Just put stuff away and find special things one at a time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:19 PM Flag
[ - ] TTC and just got my period. Friggin one day early to boot. FCK. 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:16 PM Flag
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Sorry. How long have you been TTC? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:17 PM Flag
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Well, 3 mos last yr, then took a 4 mos break to move and some other stuff, and then 7 mos this yr. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:18 PM Flag
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Are you getting any help or just trying on your own right now? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:22 PM Flag
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Age is only issue (as if that weren't all..). Got pg last yr, ubt mc. Tried IVF after that per RE suggestion, but it didn't work. RE said I'm in good shape, could get pg on my own if i don't "run out of time" [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:25 PM Flag
[ - ] i am wearing my engagement ring for the 1st time post preg and i absolutely can not get it off my finger--its been 3 days already and my finger is starting to swell. i have tried everything! am i going to have to get it cut off? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:14 PM Flag
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Have you put your hand in ice water? Try that and then slather on some moisturizer or olive oil [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:15 PM Flag
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did you try windex? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:15 PM Flag
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yup--no luck [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:16 PM Flag
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My SIL had to have her rings cut off after getting stung by a bee! Have you tried olive oil? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:21 PM Flag
[ - ] Ok, this baby needs to come out now! 0 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:10 PM Flag
[ - ] Flying from NY to LA alone with 3 yo. Do these times sound good as far as scheduling? Leave NY 11:30am arrive LA 2:25pm. Leave LA 1:45pm arrive NY 10:15pm. 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Toddler 06.08.08, 06:08 PM Flag
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Sure [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:09 PM Flag
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The tricky part with that is that the odds of your kid taking a little nap are just about nil. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:09 PM Flag
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NP: I disagree. The kid will fall asleep by 1 NYC time on the flight west and will probably be up for only part of the east-bound flight [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:12 PM Flag
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I just traveled alone with my 3 yo but didn't go cross country. I found the 7AM was the best and we did a return at 11:30 A which worked fine too. For you the 1:45 maybe the best so you know at least part of the trip they are sleeping. Also earlier are better these days because you have less chance of a delay. GL [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:15 PM Flag
[ - ] Maybe there's a small chance that somebody will know the answer to this. Is there some sort of waiver out there that military people can apply for that keeps them in the states if they have a terminally ill mom/dad? My husband was stationed in Japan and we will be there for 4 years but my mom is terminally ill and I heard there might be something out there that protects us from having to go. 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:08 PM Flag
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It's not his mom/dad, though. Sorry about your mom [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:09 PM Flag
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From what I understand from BIL, has to be an immediate family member and you need to prove hardship. Nearly impossible right now because of the war. I'm so sorry about your mom. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.08.08, 06:12 PM Flag
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