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Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] My friend who is single is flying in with her new boyfriend for the weekend to nyc and wants a recommendation of a fun, hip drinks place not too expensive with a 30 something crowd, not 20 something crowd. chic but won't cost $20 a drink. suggestions? like to send them to a cool place but I'm not cool! 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:58 AM Flag
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Lots of options in the Meatpacking District. Also, the Boathouse in Central Park would be fun and a great view. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:02 AM Flag
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boathouse is not cool [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:48 AM Flag
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the stanton social in the lower east side. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:02 AM Flag
[ - ] Can anyone confirm if the g&t placement letters have been mailed? The talk seems to be about when we should get them, eliding the crucial question of whether they have been sent YET. I find the idea that the DOE is busy making personal calls rather worrisome. 29 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 06.10.08, 10:55 AM Flag
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Someone on Inside Schools recently posted that they got an email saying they won't be mailed for 7-10 days. Otherwise, DOE site still says we'll get them this week [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:56 AM Flag
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Yes, I've read that too, but why do they tell us when we'll get them rather than when they sent them? Isn't the real question when it went in the mail? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:05 AM Flag
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oh, who cares? In the end you will get a letter. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:00 AM Flag
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I do! Kids need time to transition, as do parents. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:03 AM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:04 AM Flag
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They may not know, but you can bet that with all these end-of-year celebrations, with countless parents and kids asking dd where she's going to k and talking about where they're going, my dd is anxious about all this. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:06 AM Flag
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my dc is anxious but so are his parents! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:08 AM Flag
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nnp: My dd is actually quite anxious about the whole thing. Some of her classmates are going to private and, so, have known where they will be in K for months. They talk about it. DD feels left out, anxious, but is very hesitant to bring it up. Don't assume your child is clueless just b/c they don't say anything to you directly. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:20 AM Flag
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ridiculous [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:28 AM Flag
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I admire your calm. I guess I should cut back on the coffee b/c I'm jumping out of my skin at this stage. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:06 AM Flag
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I'm calm now, but I'm sure I'll be running home when we learn that people are starting to receive their letters. I did that when we learned the scores were out. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:11 AM Flag
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HA! Hope you have a good pair of sneakers! I also worry about the next stage -- not just transitioning, but whether there will be waitlists and so forth. We've been given so little information and it seems that the DOE makes it up as it goes and we know how well that was for the preK and middle school placements. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:13 AM Flag
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NP: I can't reply to poster above, but there will be no waitlists. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:25 AM Flag
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That's what they say, but there is clearly going to be another round. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:29 AM Flag
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What other round? Why do you think that? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:31 AM Flag
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of course, but that is not a waiting list [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:33 AM Flag
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fair enough, but doesn't it amount to the same thing -- that is, we don't know the rules or how to proceed? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:36 AM Flag
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Pssst. Can you guys please explain what you are talking about? Certain schools informally maintaining WL? Making calls? What are you guys talking about? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:40 AM Flag
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Some G&T testers did not apply for placement and the DOE has been phoning them at home, or so that has been reported here on UB. Others have assumed that this is because there will be another round of placements. It is also the case that some will only take A but also listed NEST and will not accept a place at NEST if offered. So, the question is how and when the sorting will end. The assumption is that there will be another round. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:53 AM Flag
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That's your assumption. I don't buy it. This will not be a problem for the citywides. It might be a problem for not well regarded district programs. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:56 AM Flag
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Lots of folks will decline a spot at NEST because reality hit them and they just can't do the commute. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:58 AM Flag
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Or because it's just not a good school [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:27 PM Flag
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what rules? if you ranked the schools and the DOE got your selections and placed your DC you are done. Accept the spot or leave it. Folks that moved to NYC over the spring and summer, kids that had to retake the test due to technical errors with the test, and other kids that slipped through the cracks because of errors the DOE made will be placed using the seats that were left vacant after the original placements and acceptances were made. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:57 AM Flag
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Maybe one of us knows someone at a G&T admin school office and can tell us if the schools have the lists yet? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:01 AM Flag
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Even if the schools have the lists, they won't leak the information if it is meant to come from the DOE. But perhaps it is worth asking. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:04 AM Flag
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I posted on the Insideschools thread, asking Helen to check in with her OSEPO contacts to try and verify the rumor that letters won't go out for 7-10 days from now. They have not even posted my comment yet... maybe they're working on it? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:24 AM Flag
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THANKS! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:28 AM Flag
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We rejected NEST weeks ago - going to a better D2 School [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:28 PM Flag
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You must mean for middle school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 02:01 PM Flag
[ - ] What's the lowest offer within reason I can make on a $650k house? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:54 AM Flag
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imo depending on where you live and how long its been on the market i would say 10%, so 600k [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:55 AM Flag
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thanks. it's new to market and overpriced compared to comps, but it's fsbo so they probably don't know better [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:57 AM Flag
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Good question. I guess it depends on where the place is and what the current market is like. I would say at 50-100,000 less. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:56 AM Flag
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whoa, i like this answer! lol [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:58 AM Flag
[ - ] 13 weeks PG with number 2 and suddenly, bizarrely terrified of labor. I had a smooth but painful time with number 1 - wanted an epidural but never got one (all the anesthetists were busy with other patients). I'm so happy to be pregnant but just so afraid of the end of the process! Anyone feel/felt the same way? 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Newborn 06.10.08, 10:53 AM Flag
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Which hospital? That sounds horrible! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:54 AM Flag
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NYU. It was horrible - but didn't last all that long (maybe 4 hours) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:56 AM Flag
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get to the hospital sooner and request asap. don't wait till there's so much pain. my anesthesiologist took a long time too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:58 AM Flag
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You are me. I chose to go unmedicated last time and hated it. Now I'm worried that it will go so fast with #2 that I won't have time for an epidural. I'm in denial. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:58 AM Flag
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Right - although part of me says, I managed it last time, and there are risks that come with epidurals. Maybe I should try going without again. And then I remember the pain... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:01 AM Flag
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Try not to worry too much just ask for your epidural very early next time. I had mine before I felt any pain at all with #2 and everything was fine. GL [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:01 AM Flag
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^at nyu too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:01 AM Flag
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Just try to remember that it is very painful, but there is an end in sight - and once it is all done you will have a beautiful baby. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:03 AM Flag
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that is unacceptable in a NYC hospital. At Cornell there is virtually now wait time. Honestly, I would talk to your doctor now abot why that happened and waht can be done. He or she needs to knwo it was unnacceptable. Frankly, so does the hospital. They allhave patient advocates who deal with this. It may be catharic for you to have a mission. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:04 AM Flag
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If your first labor was 4 hrs then the second will be a breeze! I delivered no. 2 at NYU and the nurses all told me to wait before getting epi. They were right. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:44 AM Flag
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NYU is not a great place for a non-medicated birth. I delivered my first there (non-medicated). Second birth was at SLR, and they were much more supportive of non-medicated birth. That said, if I had to do it a 3rd time, I would ask for the epidural! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:46 AM Flag
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I gave birth to number 2 at Cornell. I told them as soon as I was admitted and in triage that I wanted an epidural. The attending anesthesiologist, Dr. Jill Fong, was no where to be found. She didn't answer any of her pages. After 2 hrs, I delivered sans drugs and I was so disturbed. A patient should get pain alleviation from a hospital after 2 hrs. Patient services at Cornell protected their own after I complained. I had my first child at NYU Hospital. When I requested an epidural, they came almost immediately. Cornell lacks inter-communication and the staff lacks accountability. Cornell was voted the best place to give birth in NYC by New York Magazine 2006. But, I think that rating should fall since I've recently met a lot of women who have had poor experiences there. If you are giving birth at Cornell, make sure you have an advocate with you because no one at Cornell will take ownership of your issues. Ask your advocate to follow up with all your requests, and take down everyone's names. Go to the hospital sooner rather than later with your second pregnancy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 08.01.08, 12:39 PM Flag
[ - ] i spent a weekend at a friend's summer house - they paid for all food, drinks, etc., and i'd like to send a little something more than a thank you note. suggestions under $50? TIA 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:53 AM Flag
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um - i think i would go a bit higher if they paid for all - how about a case of wine? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:03 AM Flag
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flowers? grilling stuff? gc to local restaurant (would spend $100 for that). personalized summer house sign from ll bean. any of the monogrammed summer stuff from ll bean. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:04 AM Flag
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does their summer home have a name? You could do a couple of LLBean boat totes with the name of the house on it, or send daffodil bulbs from White Flower Farm (order on line), or get lucite barware (good around swimming pools) that is monogrammed or etched with name of house or something? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:16 AM Flag
[ - ] I ovulated on May 31st, can I take an early detection preg. test or is it too soon? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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TTC 06.10.08, 10:48 AM Flag
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you can take one, but the longer you hold out, the better. wait 3 more days. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:59 AM Flag
[ - ] I ovulated on May 31st, can I take an early detection preg. test or is it too soon? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:46 AM Flag
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take it! might not be postive b/c too early, but why not [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:48 AM Flag
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ita - can always retest in a few days if it's neg. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:48 AM Flag
[ - ] WWYD? 2.4yo dd talks about pee/poop all the time, really wants to wear underpants, etc. Yesterday she refused to either wear a diaper or sit on the potty. She peed a bit on the floor, we ran to the potty, she peed a bit more in the potty, got an M&M and LOTS of praise, and she put on some underpants. One hour later she peed a TON on the floor and willingly put on a diaper. WWYD? Schedule a weekend of potty-training? Hold off a couple of months? (I'm pg, so we'll have a new baby in the house as of August.) 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:44 AM Flag
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Mine was doing that a few months back. Not ready. Either hold off or just have her pee in potty first thing in morning and after meals and nap time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:47 AM Flag
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I would keep going with it, but follow her lead. Sounds like she wants to learn. My dd trained at that age. We had a false start where we tried underwear but she got scared off and went back to diapers for a couple weeks. There were lots of accidents the first couple of days but after that she started getting it and the accidents were minimal. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:55 AM Flag
[ - ] can someone brief me on "dont let the pidgeon drive the bus"? what is it about? would my almost 5yo appreciate it? what about a 3 yo? 13 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:43 AM Flag
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omg. lol. it's about a pigeon who wants to drive a bus. i can't believe your 5yo doesn't have it memorized by now [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:43 AM Flag
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i do not have that book - but i have others by same author - do you have all of the books that i have? is this one some standard requirement? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:49 AM Flag
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what? if you have the other pigeon books, you know what to expect [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:50 AM Flag
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he has other books--np [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:56 AM Flag
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i dont have pidgeon books - i have knuffle bunny [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:56 AM Flag
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psst. it's pigeon, no d! :) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:59 AM Flag
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np: snotty poster. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:53 AM Flag
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It's popular with the 2-3yos I know. Big pictures not many words. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:48 AM Flag
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My 3 yo has no interest. My 6yo has loved it since he was 5, still does. Enjoy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:53 AM Flag
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Good for a 2-3yo. It's a fun book for grown-ups to read out loud. Love anything by Mo Willems - they're all great books! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:53 AM Flag
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the pigeon books are great. esp like Don't Let the Pigeon Stay up Late. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:12 AM Flag
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81. But my dc will kick the living shit out of your dcs on the playgrounds. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:15 AM Flag
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my 5 yo loves all the pigeon books [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:16 AM Flag
[ - ] mac/word users...I have an extra blank page at the end of my document. How do I get rid of it??? 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 06.10.08, 10:42 AM Flag
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ball up, throw in garbage can [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:45 AM Flag
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usually I would but I need to save it to a cd and take it to a printers to make double sided copies on thinker/glossy paper and I don't want to pay for 50 extra pages [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:48 AM Flag
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DELETE YOU FUCKKEN RETARD! YOU ARE THE FUCK DUMBEST BITCH [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:45 AM Flag
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gee, thanks...uh I already tried that [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:47 AM Flag
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NP. Wow that was a helpful response!!! I don't know but I think there is something you can do with moving the page brakes. GL [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:55 AM Flag
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thank you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:59 AM Flag
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does changing the margins help? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:18 AM Flag
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Highlight the blank page and delete. If not start at bottom of page and hit backspace until page is gone. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:24 AM Flag
[ - ] when introducing db to food like peas, corn assuming you made your own food did you just cook and puree? what about fruits like plums? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 06.10.08, 10:41 AM Flag
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corn is not good to introduce eaerly -- allergenic. peas, i cooked andpureed and at first i had to strain them. plums i jstu mashed up ripe ones, sometimes with some water. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:46 AM Flag
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op - corn is a stage 2 food in the jarred stuff - but if I have done sweet potatoes, carrots, bananas, apples, pears and am doing peas - can I then do corn [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:58 AM Flag
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most docs say wait on corn to one year, or close to it. how old is baby? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:03 AM Flag
[ - ] Good gift for new baby sister to give big sister at the hospital? TIA. 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:37 AM Flag
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I wouldn't do a gift. I would have big sister come to me first, spend time with her and then go get baby in nursery together. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:02 AM Flag
[ - ] do any of you buy diapers on line and have them shipped? What is the cheapest online website for this 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:29 AM Flag
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i used diapers.com (FKA 800diapers.com) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:40 AM Flag
[ - ] WWYD??? DS is a freshman..and has failed a class..he goes to a catholic school..money is tight. DH wants to pull him out and send him to a public school. DS knew the consequences..good idea?? or will he go downhill?? 55 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:29 AM Flag
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don't understand. you're making him go public because he failed a class or because money is tight? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:38 AM Flag
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what class did he fail? how were his other grades? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:38 AM Flag
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where do you live? what are your public school options? past time for standard application process, so placement might be a problem [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:40 AM Flag
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we were in this exact situation last year. my son is now a soph and is doing so much better at his catholic hs. tuition is a real financial burden for us too, but we explained to him that we think it's worth it for him to remain there and if he thinks likewise, he should work harder b/c he can get Ds and Fs for free in public school. it took a lot of work on his part, but he has turned it around. i urge you to do what you can to keep your son in his present school if he likes it. the key for us was that my son wanted to stay in his school and we told him what he had to do to make this happen. good luck [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:47 AM Flag
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a lot of Catholic schools are worse than public, so you might be doing your ds a favor [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:52 AM Flag
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and a lot of public school are worse than prison, you bigot. i'm sure she did her research before she put the child in the school. you wouldn't have said that if she had said "yeshiva," get over yourself. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:56 AM Flag
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omigod. project much? np btw [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:58 AM Flag
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no, i am not projecting. my son goes to an excellent east coast catholic hs. the catholic bashing that goes on, particularly among wealthy nyers, is sickening and ignorant; worst of all, it's cloaked in pc faux intellegent double speak. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:01 AM Flag
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I think you have a chip on your shoulder. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:02 AM Flag
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am i annoyed about people assuming that all catholics accept inferior educations for their children in order to be "jesus freaks" when that is not the case, yes. i still say that if she had mentioned any other school with a religious affiliation, that comment would not have been made. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:08 AM Flag
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I don't see where you get that in her post. obviously you've been on the receiving end of this attitude, but I still think you're overreacting in this case [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:13 AM Flag
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or: Stop assigning intent to what I said. I didn't say anything about jesus freaks or catholics accepting inferior schools. Did you read my other responses? When test scores are compared, parochial schools often do worse than publics. I'm only talking about parochial schools b/c that's what OP is talking about, not yeshivas or madrassas or anything else. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:14 AM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:04 AM Flag
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don't you mean "intelligent"? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:10 AM Flag
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sorry for the typo - typing quickly and in anger. not a stupid "catholic" mistake [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:13 AM Flag
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^^^honey, you have issues. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:14 AM Flag
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speak for yourself [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:17 AM Flag
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I'm just reading the post. not OR [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:20 AM Flag
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she's just stating a fact, Miss Knee Jerk. and speaking of bigots, why would you assume she was Jewish? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:00 AM Flag
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or here: I'm not Jewish. I'm basing my opinion on studies that have been published comparing test results from parochial vs. public. What's with the name calling? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:02 AM Flag
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i did not assume anyone was jewish. i just wished to point out that catholics are fair game in a way that no other religion would be. btw, name calling cheapens what might have otherwise been a valid point. also saying "some catholic schools are worse than public school" may be a fact, but she meant it more as a bait. furthermore, some public schools ARE worse than prisons. also a fact. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:04 AM Flag
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or: I did not mean it as a bait. What would make you say that? I was stating a fact. My brother went to a crappy parochial school. Our mom pulled him out and sent him to public which was a lot better. There are a lot of mediocre parochial schools out there. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:06 AM Flag
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I'd like to see a link on your public school/prison "fact." and catholics being targets is a bit much IMO. I do think you're a little touchy on this. Knee jerk as in knee-jerk reaction. not really name calling [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:08 AM Flag
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have you ever seen flushing high? freaking prison [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:07 PM Flag
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nope [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:09 PM Flag
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yes, name calling cheapens your point, and you started it with calling OR a bigot. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:18 AM Flag
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exactly! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:20 AM Flag
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you need serious help [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:08 AM Flag
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I'm sure this is true, but if money is tight, why would they keep in the school if it was good. OP seems to be MIA [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:59 AM Flag
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he failed ONE class and you are acting like this? Are you sure this is going to help him? In the end this is about him, right? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:58 AM Flag
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I was a fuck up as a kid. I would have been well served by a harsh dose of consequences like that. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:01 AM Flag
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but it's not going to help the kid to put him in another school just because. there are other consequences that can be doled out. if he's struggling academically, they could get a tutor. if it's a social issue, moving him could be the best thing or the worst thing. but I don't know why I'm bothering with these suppositions since we don't know the details anyway! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:04 AM Flag
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you would have been served well to be put in a worse school bc you failed one class? maybe you could be helped by parents, a tutor, or after school homework program instead?? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:21 AM Flag
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You were a fuck up because you failed *one* class? There is more to it in your case, no? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:31 AM Flag
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I know, is it about the money or punishing ds? I guess we'll never know because OP is gone! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:01 AM Flag
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OP here..sorry..once I posted..the board was having problems..and I could not log on. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:47 AM Flag
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well, this post was lost to crazy catholic school lady, so you should probably cut and paste a new one... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:48 AM Flag
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lol [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:49 AM Flag
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^^we will not pay the tuition for D's and F's..it's a struggle..but we are willing to pay..we just want EFFORT..he was doing great the first half of school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:49 AM Flag
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I think you need to try to pinpoint the cause of the change. kids don't just fall off like that for no reason. does he like the school? what course did he fail? could it be that it's just difficult for him? I made good grades but could not pass geometry without a tutor. just couldn't get my brain around it for some reason [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:52 AM Flag
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eng, math,theology, soc st..he was getting B's very close to A's...now..mostly D's and failed theology. a lot of missing h.w. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:54 AM Flag
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any idea why? what do his teachers say? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:56 AM Flag
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personally, I think that if he failed a class, then it is the parents that are to blame at this age. You think it would be helpful to punish your child for something that he hasn't accomplished because his parents are not willing enough to spend the time to help him instead of punishing him.... and seeing that he needs their help instead of inappropiate discipline. No child ever wants to fail... nor does a child ever want to disappoint their parents. get your principles right. and may be you won't be posting this. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:55 AM Flag
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op here..i agree.. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:57 AM Flag
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^^^and you base this on what? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:59 AM Flag
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I don't think I've really been involved. We ask all the time about hw and how school is..etc..but when I saw his grades dropping ..I just [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:03 PM Flag
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^^"tell" him he has to bring them up. But..part of me says he is old enough..he knows better..he knows what has to be done. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:04 PM Flag
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but do you have any clue what is behind the drop in grades? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:09 PM Flag
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actually, he porbably doesn't. First and foremost: GET THE COMPUTER OUT OF HIS ROOM. it si only for homework , not socializing until his grades come up....you need a plan with his teachers to know ahead of tiem that homework is nor being sent in. Second, he is probably not good at organizing himself. Buy and read and implement "The Organized Child." Third, you need to give him a reason to succeed. Community college is not a reason to succeed. It sounds like your dd is not doing so well there either. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:21 PM Flag
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I think it depends on the kid. I'm involved with dd's school in that I go to parent/teacher meetings and other school events, but I don't check up on her because she handles her schoolwork responsibly and is an honor student. I think, like OP, I would get more involved if/when her grades started falling. But I don't she has anything to gain by my being involved now. She knows I'm very proud of how well she does in school, and she's entirely self-motivated [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:08 PM Flag
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OP, we tried to chat withyou yesterday...give advice, ask questions, etc about his roganization and study habits, btu you never responded. Perhaps there are "follow-through" issues in your family. Any way...jsut wondering what is going. It sounds like your dh is not into education as a priority for $. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:18 PM Flag
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You need to tellus more about the tow school options. Are you in NYC, the burbs, Chicago, etc. Is the public school very large, well reagarded and do kids go to college form there (and do you care if ds goes to college at all). Does ds play sports? Which school has better sports for him. Don't tell me about tight money...my parents lived on a shoe string for our parochial and private educations...best thing they ever did for us and them. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:27 PM Flag
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I would get my child a tutor quickly and set some boundaries, such as 7-9 is all quiet, sit down and study no matter what. Yes, I know he probably has more homework than 2 hrs, but it's a routine. Study should be in a place with no distractions...if his room is distracting, do it at the dining table or something. You need to "teach" him how to improve the situation for himself. He may not know how to "improve his grades" per se...there may be a problem. BTW, it will look better for college if he "fixes" his problem and improves...if he changes schools, it will look like he got booted out after freshman year. Big difference, imho. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:54 PM Flag
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the op has anolder child part-time in CCollege who is not doing so well. College may not be a priority in this family. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:24 PM Flag
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Yes ..it is a priority..that's why we stress doing well..so he will get into the college of his choice. We wanted dd to go away to college and play ball..she didn't want to go away..we didn't push it..We always said if she didn't like it she could come back home..at least give it a try..I don't know..do you force a kid to go away??? I've heard both sides of the story...college is important to us. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 03:19 PM Flag
[ - ] has anyone stayed at Grand Hotel or La Mer Inn in Cape May NJ? feedback or rec. please? thank you! 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:26 AM Flag
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La Mer is across the street from the beach; I have a rental available a few blocks offshore. La Mer is pretty standard, seems to attract a very french canadian clientele in general. It seems rather expensive for the least characteristic Cape May accomodation but looks clean. Check my link and give a call. http://www.simonecolina.com/quad/ [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.11.08, 08:02 PM Flag
[ - ] Dh and I can not agree on who to leave our kids to in our will. He wants his family and I want mine. This has turned into a very, very heated debate at times and even involves some criticisms of our families and mudslining. I hate it! We can't have the state take our kids until something is decided in court. I don't know what to do to resolve this. 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:25 AM Flag
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How about friends? You know the saying, you can't pick your family, but you can pick your friends. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:26 AM Flag
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OP: I suggested that but he said all of our friends are flaky [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:27 AM Flag
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Here are some things to consider: age of parents, marital status of sibs, "family values [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:28 AM Flag
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^^^whoops - family values of people raising child. Age of sibs kids - maybe close to college and don't want to raise young kids anymore. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:29 AM Flag
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it may be worth some very targetted counseling on this one issue. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:26 AM Flag
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HA! Texans don't counsel. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:27 AM Flag
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do you have a pastor? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:39 AM Flag
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three things to bear in mind: 1. Is so extremely unlikely that you two will die simultaneously, that the whole issue is like thinking seriously about a lotto ticket. 2. The will is not binding on your families anyway. What happens with the kids will be a big discussion they will all have to work out. Knowing your wishes, of course, will be helpful, but not a guarantee of what happens. 3. Your family is a bunch of psychos, so the kids probably should go with DH's clan. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:41 AM Flag
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i'm curious. why do you think OP's appointment of a guardian would not be given effect? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 10:45 AM Flag
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I have to be honest, I don't think that this should cause "heated debates" unless there are real issues - do any of the options do drugs? Alcoholic? Abusive? If not, then I say put the names in a hat and pick. Are there any real reasons why you want your family or why he wants his? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:11 AM Flag
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np: if you have disagreements about family, this issue brings them into teh open. i can't stand my zBIL and i'm an only so we can't compormise [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 11:17 AM Flag
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