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Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] DH here. The wife and kids are away for the week and I'm feeling the need to hook up with someone. I love my wife but we haven't had much of a sex life since the birth of our second child 6 months ago. How do you handle something like that? I'm just looking for sex and not a relationship. Between work, home, and kids I have my hands full already. I just need some relief. Tired of j#$king off after my wife goes to bed early. Thanks for listening. 18 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:37 AM Flag
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L.O.S.E.R. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:38 AM Flag
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fake [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:39 AM Flag
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ITA [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:39 AM Flag
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I'm actually very real. Isn't this a problem that other people have? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:40 AM Flag
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I know it's tempting. But don't do it. It's not worth it. 6 mos post baby is not a lot of time. Focus on getting your sex life back on track when she comes back and in the meantime, jerk off, rent some porn, and go to a strip club if you have to - but don't bother with the hook up. Trust me, it's not worth it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:40 AM Flag
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Thanks for your non judgmental response. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:42 AM Flag
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hang in there. also, my advice: don't go out and drink as a 'single guy' - you'll screw up your better judgement. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:44 AM Flag
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Thanks for your advice. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:49 AM Flag
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go away [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:40 AM Flag
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If this isn't fake, you should really look at what kind of person you are. Your wife, who you claim to love, just had a baby six months ago, and you're crying over not having much sex? This is about character and vows. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:43 AM Flag
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DH???? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:43 AM Flag
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Actually I didn't really want to have a second child. I thought life in NYC was ok with one child. Also, I'm six years older than my wife and in mid 40's. I wasn't really looking for a larger family. My wife said if we didn't get pregnant then she would leave me and have a kid with someone else. She had already left me once before we had our first daughter so I could believe she would do it again. That being said, I love our second daughter and know she is precious. I just want to give you some perspective as to our relationship before our second child is born. Now my wife wants to stay home, but we can't afford it and still live in the city. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:55 AM Flag
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Sounds like you have bigger problems to deal with than a poor sex life. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:57 AM Flag
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I think you're probably correct. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 08:00 AM Flag
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My dh didn't want a second child and we didn't have one. Now I feel like it is too late and I am sorry. SOmetimes I think he is sorry as well. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 08:02 AM Flag
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How you handle it is by growing up and realizing that you can't always have everything you want. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:44 AM Flag
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ndh: I think OP is an ass but to be fair, his issue is not that he doesn't "always have everything he wants." It is that he never has the one thing he wants. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:58 AM Flag
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You need to think about your situation differently. There's nothing you can do now about that second child now that it is here. Baby is here to stay, so think about how you can make DW feel honored to have brought your second into the world. Also, you'll have unfaithful impulses from time to time, enjoy the notion for the moment it comes, but don't give in. You'll regret it for the rest of your life. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 08:15 AM Flag
[ - ] Need some good ideas for lullabies for a baby's album. Any suggestions I should download? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:33 AM Flag
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^^I'm burning a mixed cd of lullabies for a friend if I didn't make that clear. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:34 AM Flag
[ - ] where to find events for 22mo boy on the weekends in Manhattan? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:21 AM Flag
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Gocitykids.com is a good start. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:23 AM Flag
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yup, they send a weekly email letting you know about upcoming events. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:32 AM Flag
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their website has been horrible to try to open (calendar of events page). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:41 AM Flag
[ - ] What type of gift to you give your nanny for her bday? Mine is p/t but has been with us for almost 2yrs. 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:20 AM Flag
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A giftcard to her favorite store? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:22 AM Flag
[ - ] DH's twin brother and his wife, at the age of 26, required several rounds of IUI to conceive due to motility problems. DH's mom and Dad, at 27, apparently conceived DH and his brother with some 70's artificial insemination procedure as well, for the same reason. We're now 33 and TTC#1. Given that family history, how long would you try before seeking help? TIA. 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:14 AM Flag
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i believe that getting dh's sperm checked is the easiest of all the things you can do and since this appears to be the family issue, why not just get it done so you know what you're dealing with in advance. if he's clear, then you try on your own. if he's not, then you can decide whether it's worth trying for a period of time befre seeking active intervention [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:17 AM Flag
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^^Would they check his sperm as part of a normal doctor's appointment or physical? I ask b/c when I first told my internist we were going to try (and I did NOT mention this problem to her) she said, "Well, don't even start to worry or think you have to come in unless you've tried for 8 months or so." So, I'm wondering if they'll even see DH until we've hit the 8 mo. active trying mark. (I've been off BC since 2005, following my cycles for a year with CBEFM, but we've only been trying by having intercourse 10 times a month and timing and so forth for a few months.) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:21 AM Flag
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What I've learned in my fertility experiences is that you can get whatever tests you want whenever you want...you just have to find the right doctors. Docs that tell you they "won't" do this until it's been X number of mos., that's bologne and not a customized approach. I agree with previous poster, just get dh [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:28 AM Flag
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sorry, broken post...I would just get his sperm tested. Try ReproLab if you are in the city. Or have him go to HIS internist and get a rec for a urologist. Checking sperm is definitely not part of a "normal physical". [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:30 AM Flag
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Okay. We share the same internist, in Boston. It's a little weird b/c he is a surgical resident in the same hospital, so we tread lightly about asking for people to do things... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:34 AM Flag
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^^I forgot to say thanks! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:36 AM Flag
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Well then go somewhere else, seriously. Or get a new doctor. These are easy solutions. This is your health you're talking about, it shouldn't be "a little weird" or embarrassing...really. I say this having been in the same position of TTC at early 30s. There's no point in waiting when you think he may have a hereditary issue with sperm. Testing sperm is the easiest, least invasive test you will ever have done if you have to go down the road of working with an RE, trust me! Especially if you've been charting for a year, frankly I am surprised you haven't had him checked already. GL to you!! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:39 AM Flag
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Thanks. I was charting to get an idea of my cycle, but we weren't actively trying. I'm going to talk to him about it. I appreicate your help. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:41 AM Flag
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Good luck, really! And I hope it's not a long road for you... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:44 AM Flag
[ - ] need some "class" ideas. 1yo dc loves little maestros and want to do one more activity. live on the upper east sude. 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Newborn 07.24.08, 07:08 AM Flag
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maybe a gym class? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:12 AM Flag
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Gymboree is good for a 1yo [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:31 AM Flag
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swimming at the Y. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:31 AM Flag
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PITA for a 1yo. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:33 AM Flag
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ita and there's one on 84th and 1st. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 08:07 AM Flag
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I really vote for the one near your house. Maybe one of the nursery-school style simple classes at Rhinelander or the 92nd St Y or something at A-ha (do a trial first). Swimming is a pain at that age (IMO) and hit or miss (sometimes they hate it). I am a fan of Art Farm, but for a little older. Also, at 18 months Tiny Tumblers at the 92nd St Y or another gym. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:42 AM Flag
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was looking into ny kids club. any feedback on that place? i have heard very mixed things. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:54 AM Flag
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If it's close to where you live it is fine. I wouldn't travel to get there for a 1yo class. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 08:00 AM Flag
[ - ] any ideas for a birthday present for a 2yo boy? tia. 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:07 AM Flag
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puzzle or anything with a ball or trucks/motorcycles [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:20 AM Flag
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Shopping cart [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:39 AM Flag
[ - ] Our neighbor is checking on our cats 3x while we're on vacation. What is a good thank you gift to give her? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:03 AM Flag
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a gift certificate to a restaurant. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:09 AM Flag
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Depends on how long you will be gone [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:35 AM Flag
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3x-- Maybe take her to lunch sometime, or bring her some nice flowers. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:36 AM Flag
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Food/booze items from where ever you are going... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:43 AM Flag
[ - ] Does anyone know if Tenafly Pediatrics is open to splitting MMR? tia 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 06:54 AM Flag
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WHY WHY WHY? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:46 AM Flag
[ - ] has anyone gone to the salon to ask for a trim, not bikini wax? 9 mos pg. 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 06:52 AM Flag
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Funny. I'm 9 mos and I'm going for a bikini wax even though a trim would probably be fine. You can ask for whatever you want - you're paying for it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:19 AM Flag
[ - ] tmi 0 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 06:50 AM Flag
[ - ] Going to my 25th high school reunion next month. Trying to figure out what to wear to the main, formal, event. Should I go with a slinky, longish LBD or should I go with a slinky, shortish LBD? I haven't been to any of the past reunions so I'm not sure how "safe" women play it. TIA. 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 06:50 AM Flag
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Short [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 06:52 AM Flag
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OP: thanks, that's what I was thinking. Ok, next question: should I stick with a black dress or go for something with a bit of color? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 06:55 AM Flag
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I think color vs. black is less important than the overall vibe... I always like to look coolly sophisticated and not like I tried too hard (although it took HOURS!!!) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:02 AM Flag
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definitely short. is this formal like men in tuxes or formal as in not casual? my guess would be the latter. i would just wear a fabulous dress that you look awesome in. something you would wear to a cocktail party. it's august too, which IMO makes it less formal than the winter too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 07:10 AM Flag
[ - ] Please recommend a not-too-crowded & clean beach within 45 mins of Manhattan. Plan to go with DH & both kids (2.5 DDs & 2 month DS) for 3-4 hours only (just want DD to experience a beach this summer since she is learning about them in school). 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 06:50 AM Flag
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Long Beach is a great beach and within 45 minutes of NYC, by train. Take the LIR or drive. There's one strip of beach that has a playground on it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 06:56 AM Flag
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^^ LIRR ^^^ [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.24.08, 06:57 AM Flag
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