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Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] Anybody say that Kennedy's brain tumor had anything to do with alcohol consumption? 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:14 PM Flag
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anyone who says that knows nothing about brain tumors. Brain tumors have nothing to do with alcohol consumption. That's ridiculous. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:16 PM Flag
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Oh, god. Idiot alert. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:16 PM Flag
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MD mom here. No association whatsoever. Lovely thought though. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:16 PM Flag
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np: And such an awful slippery slope. Let's blame women for breast cancer and children for leukemia! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:17 PM Flag
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OR: Disgusting. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:18 PM Flag
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You know, a lot of holistic types do this too. My poor friend went to one who basically told her her "negative thoughts and stress" caused her cancer. Ugh. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:20 PM Flag
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Sheesh, like getting cancer doesn't suck enough w/o someone trying to make you feel like you deserve it. I tell my lung cancer patients they don't deserve it even when they chose to smoke. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:21 PM Flag
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ITA. So demoralizing for people to basically be told if they just had a "positive attitude" then they would be OK (not to mention that well designed studies have shown this is not the case" [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:22 PM Flag
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I wanted to slap that smug idiot. I'm all in believing positive energy can help you, but I don't believe negative energy can hurt you in such a way. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:27 PM Flag
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nobody with the slightest amount of knowledge or sense would say that. absolutely no association. signed, neurologist mom. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:18 PM Flag
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absolutely not. my dad had exactly the same type of brain tumor. i feel very sorry for him and his family. they are in for a rough couple of years. very soon he won't be able to speak properly and will have trouble controlling his bowels. really horrid stuff. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:43 PM Flag
[ - ] Bo Diddley died. That makes me sad. 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:12 PM Flag
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yes..it happens in 3's. Harvey Coremen, YSL and now Bo [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:17 PM Flag
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OK, OP, quick: name 3 of his songs.....you can't. Gimme a break, poser. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:18 PM Flag
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you serious? "Who Do You Love," that "papa's going to buy you a diamond ring" song, "i'm a man," and....and...well, that's three. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:34 PM Flag
[ - ] Mortgage/Real Estate Moms- Putting 40% down, but still need a 600K mortgage. Damn Jumbo Loan rates right now. Any suggestions? 417K conforming loan and maybe a piggy backing HELOC better than a 600K jumbo loan that is 1.2% higher than conforming loan rates? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Toddler 06.02.08, 05:10 PM Flag
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We did the first option. The payments were about the same right now, but we are working to pay off the HELOC more quickly, leaving us with lower payments in the future. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:12 PM Flag
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smart. 1.2% makes a HUGE difference over the lifetime of a mortgage. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:12 PM Flag
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Yes. Glad our mortgage broker showed us the calculations. DH is a writer, he gets paid in chunks, so this made great sense for us. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:16 PM Flag
[ - ] ds was going to bed so sweetly for months and now at 20mo all of the sudden screams (only for a few mins) at bedtime (8pm) and wants "more songs" and to sleep in "bed" (not crib). also waking abt an hour earlier (at 6 not 7). does he need an earlier bedtime or less sleep as he gets older? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Toddler 06.02.08, 05:08 PM Flag
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This sounds familiar (I have a 2.5yo). The extra story requests etc are just trying you out don't give in or there will be more and more demands. The early waking is normal too, either leave dc to resettle or play until normal getting up time or go in and settle but don't get them up early. It does settle eventually. GL [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:16 PM Flag
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I think you should try puttin ghim down earlier. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:16 PM Flag
[ - ] Mortgage/Real Estate Moms- Putting 40% down, but still need a 600K mortgage. Damn Jumbo Loan rates right now. Any suggestions? 417K conforming loan and maybe a piggy backing HELOC better than a 600K jumbo loan that is 1.2% higher than conforming loan rates? 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:08 PM Flag
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Yeah, esp if there's no penalty on prepaying the HELOC. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:11 PM Flag
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What are the rates these days anyway? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:11 PM Flag
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prime [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:34 PM Flag
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just bought a house and that's exactly what we did - conforming loan plus home equity loan. 1st mortgage is fixed; home equity is adjustable, but by paying a little more each month we can actually pay it down -- hopefully before the rates go up. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:11 PM Flag
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Thanks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:13 PM Flag
[ - ] Is it always true that if you resign from a job you can't collect unemployment? What if you resign so you are not terminated, and if your employer made that clear in writing and said he'd not block unemployment for you? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Toddler 06.02.08, 05:06 PM Flag
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You are voluntarily giving up income, hence no unemployment [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:21 PM Flag
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Not always true I collected unemployment when I left a job to relocate with my dh [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:51 PM Flag
[ - ] Any gift ideas for 5 yr old ds for his preschool graduation? A keepsake type of thing>..... 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:05 PM Flag
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Hardback copy of Where The Sidewalk Ends with a nice inscription [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:08 PM Flag
[ - ] So, if a co-worker says to me in an e-mail this evening that I was "a sight for sore eyes today" and that I looked "great", he's flirting, right? 26 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:05 PM Flag
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Yes, but it sounds like the harmless variety (i.e. not particularly sexual). I have a male coworker who I'm close with and he compliments my outfits, I say "thanks, honey" when he does me a favor, etc. but it's a purely brotherly/friendly kind of relationshjip. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:07 PM Flag
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op: Thanks. He asked whether I had a restful weekend or whether it is "just good genes." He's pretty flirty with me usually, but this seemed a step up, so I had to ask. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:08 PM Flag
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not necessarily. he is an older gentleman...he could just be being kind. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:07 PM Flag
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He's 28. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:09 PM Flag
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oh, yes, he is flirting. in a cheesy way [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:09 PM Flag
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op: Definitely a bit cheesy, but he's kind of dorky in a lot of ways. Hot, but dorky. I don't know that he knows how to flirt. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:11 PM Flag
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do you want him to be flirting with you? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:15 PM Flag
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op: Yes. I am so attracted to him, though I know I shouldn't be. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:15 PM Flag
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shouldn't be b/c you are married? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:18 PM Flag
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op: Yes. And happily married (except for the no sex part). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:19 PM Flag
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no sex? thats too bad. we go through periods where we rarely have sex just because we sort of forget to (sounds crazy i know). i try to make a point of being more physical and it is so helpful. would you ever cheat on him? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:21 PM Flag
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op: It doesn't sound crazy, actually. We forget all the time, as we're so exhausted and have no free time that isn't kid-related. I have no sex drive, though, and have always thought of dh as the love of my life, but not sexually. As for whether I'd cheat, I don't think so. But I'm crazy hot for this guy at work. He has a girlfriend, though, so I'm assuming he's not planning on taking this flirtation anywhere. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:23 PM Flag
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a dh, here. imo, he would DEFINITELY take his flirtation somewhere if you give him the most remote indication it would be reciprocated. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:25 PM Flag
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np: DW here and ITA. Why WOULDN'T he? As a single man, a married woman would be perfect - no commitment, can't spend too much time with you, and wants tons of sex. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:26 PM Flag
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op: Really? I have no idea what guys are thinking. He has never mentioned his girlfriend to me, and I haven't ever mentioned my dh (though the ring makes it obvious), but I know he has a girlfriend. Why do you think he would take it further? Don't men just flirt for flirting's sake? Also, what would qualify as a "remote indication" that it would be reciprocated? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:27 PM Flag
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the dh, here, again. imo, generally, men don't flirt just for flirting's sake. as previous poster noted, he likes your situation and sees how the constraints of your situation (you being colleagues and you being married) means the relationship would be totally sexual and would end with no muss and no fuss. he's in it for the sex and danger. i assume you kind of might be, too, no......? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:30 PM Flag
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well the fuss comes with the fact that it is cheating which then is followed by guilt. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:36 PM Flag
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is that OP or a judgmental comment from the peanut gallery? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:37 PM Flag
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op: someone else posted the point about the guilt, not me. But she's right, b/c I'm a guilty person by nature. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:38 PM Flag
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whats judgemental? is would be cheating (fact) which is followed by a guilty feeling (i assume to be factual in most cases) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:40 PM Flag
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op: You are right about that. Sigh. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:37 PM Flag
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op: Hmmm. I hadn't thought of it that way, but you might be right. No commitment. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:36 PM Flag
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if that is the way you see it- i am glad you are not my dh. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:41 PM Flag
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op: I'm still waiting for the dh's view about what would be even a "remote indication" that the flirting on my part would be taken to another level. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:55 PM Flag
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op: Oops. I replied to the dh below, but it didn't come out in the correct place. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:30 PM Flag
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we are the same way and i an og with our first! we just both work a ton and we are both so active we just forget to be intimate. i am sure it will be much worse when we have db. i masterbate a lot- which is silly when he is right here, but it is just quicker and easier. god...i sound so lazy! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:26 PM Flag
[ - ] Anyone remember who was reading "The Secret" in "Sex and the City"? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 06.02.08, 05:03 PM Flag
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Samantha [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:03 PM Flag
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Just before the shower scene with Dante? That scene was hot. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:04 PM Flag
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lol, the dumbest one? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:06 PM Flag
[ - ] 2yo has a raised white spot surrounded by redness on his arm, I'm concerned it might be lyme disease, does this seem likely or could it be something else? thanks 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:00 PM Flag
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Could definitely be something else, but get it checked by a doctor to be sure. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:01 PM Flag
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see a doc, but try checking google images to see pix of lyme rash. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:02 PM Flag
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thanks i did and it looks a lot like some of the pics. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:03 PM Flag
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call your doc asap, in that case. my impression on lyme treatment is that the timing of treatment is very important. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:04 PM Flag
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OK, thanks [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:05 PM Flag
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call a doc - no sense in self diagnosing this one. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:05 PM Flag
[ - ] anyone use flat rate movers? would you recommend them? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 06.02.08, 04:56 PM Flag
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We did a couple of years ago to move uptown. I don't really remember any issues so they must have done a decent job. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:02 PM Flag
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used them - they were cheap & good [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:06 PM Flag
[ - ] wwyd- dh and I have been having trouble lately. We had a long talk about it, he told me he isn't satisfied and wonders constantly what he is missing, he's not sure what he wants right now. Is this even remotely close to "normal" dh behavior? I was under the impression that, once you're married, you've decided what you want. He is also not trying anything to reconnect with me, avoids being alone with me, etc. 25 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Toddler 06.02.08, 04:49 PM Flag
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Not normal. he's going through a crisis and he's being very honest, which is unusual. Couples therapy would help [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 04:50 PM Flag
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I'm sorry, that must be so hard to watch him pull away. I don't think it's normal, but I doubt it's uncommon either. Can you suggest he start therapy? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 04:50 PM Flag
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op: I've tried, I've begged in fact- he went himself for a few months but claimed nothing helped. I'm really at a loss in this- torn between being furious and frustrated. Not good. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 04:51 PM Flag
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I'd go to therapy myself to figure out what YOU want. Because when someone acts like your DH is, everything in life becomes trying to please him. You'll forget whether it's worth it anymore. Best of luck, hope he snaps out of it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 04:53 PM Flag
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op: he did this early in our relationship, broke up because he wasn't sure what he wanted, etc. I thought it was just a phase (we were early 20's). Now, dc and house later, he seems to be doing it again. I don't think I can go through that again with him, but I feel like I owe it to dc to try. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 04:56 PM Flag
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The friendship with the other woman is troubling. I think emotional affairs can be even more damaging than a fling. Really, see a therapist and discuss what your options are and what your boundaries for his behavior will be. He will otherwise erode all your expectations and goals, and you deserve better. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 04:59 PM Flag
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find a great counselor to facilitate conversation... dh and i went through a rough patch and did this weekly for about a month and we totally got back on track... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 04:52 PM Flag
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i'm sorry to bring this up, but do you think he's interested in someone else? it's strange that he isn't even trying. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 04:53 PM Flag
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op: I didn't want to bring it in to my post because everyone jumps on the affair thing, but he has become really close with a woman who has gone through some rough stuff in the last few years. I've been uncomfortable with the relationship because it seemed that becoming friends with her started this whole mess. I can believe it's not an affair, but I think it's something. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 04:55 PM Flag
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trust your instincts. try to get him to go to counseling with you. chances are it will not get better if you don't act [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 04:57 PM Flag
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i agree. you have to get him back into the marriage. make it a big issue that you want to go to counseling. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:01 PM Flag
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op: sigh, been there. He really just won't go. Maybe I'm just deluding myself, maybe this is all his way of getting me to call it quits so he doesn't have to. He swears he doesn't want to divorce. I wish I'd never taken him back years ago. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:02 PM Flag
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what does he say when you bring up the relationship? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:09 PM Flag
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np: yep, he's putting it on you, making you do his dirty work [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:11 PM Flag
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Thats so hard. My dh has a very close female friend- and they are just friends- have been since they were in high school- but the relationship still sometimes gets on my nerves. i think you need to address it with him. you two are a team. he needs to be in this as much as you are and willing to work on it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:06 PM Flag
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how long have you been married? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:11 PM Flag
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how did he meet this woman? is she a mutual friend of exclusively his friend? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:14 PM Flag
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I thought he was cheating before I read this part (see my response below). Now I'm sure of it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:10 PM Flag
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sometimes when i pull away from my dh, it's because he's been really busy and i feel hurt. also, i tend to catch myself wanting him to initiate the reconnection process during those times. could that at all be what your dh is doing? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 04:56 PM Flag
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op: I've tried everything to reconnect, but he rejects it and I get hurt. Even going to a movie, he won't do it. It's so hurtful, I tell him this and I still get nowhere. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 04:58 PM Flag
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that sounds different than what i do. i'm really sorry that he's doing that. in your shoes, i would find a good therapist so that i'd have a regular outlet to talk about how i was feeling, etc. a was in therapy a few years ago and it was great. if you can afford it, go twice a week at the beginning to jump start things. good luck. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:01 PM Flag
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He's cheating. Big time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:07 PM Flag
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not necessarily. but i agree he is probably THINKING about cheating which in my book is just as bad as the actual deed. OP- would you leave him if he were cheating? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:09 PM Flag
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op: at this point, it would be a relief to find that out and be able to end it for that reason. So yes, I would. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:23 PM Flag
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is she a mutual friend? do you know her? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:26 PM Flag
[ - ] this is why i love nyc/people from nyc. on vacation we were telling someone how great the qual of life is in baltimore. we have a big house, really inexpensive, good schools. she said turkey's really cheap too (the country turkey). i thought it was so quick witted and true. 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 04:48 PM Flag
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I don't get it [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 04:48 PM Flag
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like she equates baltimore to turkey. yes, the housing is cheaper, but no inkling of a desire to ever live there. outside of ny there si nothing else [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 04:55 PM Flag
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Funny. But also like a lot of shit we say in NYC, not exactly true! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 04:51 PM Flag
[ - ] How meaningful a predictor are those height/weight percentiles anyway? Should we waste any time interpreting them beyond - 'baby is growing appropriately.' 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 04:47 PM Flag
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i don't know, but i always leave feeling like ds is too small... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 04:54 PM Flag
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breastfed? The charts are based on formula, so bf are often lighter. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 04:56 PM Flag
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not anymore & he's still small. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 04:58 PM Flag
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np: Ditto. He's on the low end of the curve and that damn chart quantifies it in an awful way. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 04:56 PM Flag
[ - ] downtown manhattan want fun place for dinner, maybe something outside, where should I go 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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New York City 06.02.08, 04:46 PM Flag
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how far downtown? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 04:47 PM Flag
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Garden at Ono, Gansevoort Hotel [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 04:48 PM Flag
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nolita, good people watching. south st seaport-yummy italian at arqua [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 05:01 PM Flag
[ - ] 21 mo has screamed for almost an hour at bedtime nightly for the last 6 weeks. But he's gone done w/o a peep the last 3 nights. Can I pop champagne yet?? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 04:44 PM Flag
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noooooooooooooo [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 04:45 PM Flag
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it is absolutely a reassuring sign of progress [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 04:45 PM Flag
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Can I put it in the fridge? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.02.08, 04:47 PM Flag
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