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[ - ] DD has short hair and a lot of people think she is a boy. She is v athletic and wears boyish clothes. She is afraid to go into the girls bathroom because she says people stare at her and wonder why a boy is in the bathroom. There are no gender-neutral bathrooms in the school. She currently holds it all day, esp because she is in a new school. I said she should put a giant hair clip in her hair and go in. Or a hairband. How do you think she should solve this problem? 46 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:38 AM Flag
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How old is she? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:39 AM Flag
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11. Just started 6th grade and is afraid of the older kids in middle school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:40 AM Flag
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Is it that she feels in danger from the other kids? Sometimes there is a bizarre spike in rigidly enforced gender norms from other kids that can get really aggressive. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 03:16 AM Flag
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Oh this is interesting. That they need control at this difficult and awkward time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.11.19, 02:46 AM Flag
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Tell her to own it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:40 AM Flag
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I do tell her that and she owns it in the sense that she will not change - no earrings, no girly clothes. But she is still afraid and hates being stared at, so she doesn't go (well, hasn't on day 1 and doesn't plan on it tomorrow or ever at this point) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:42 AM Flag
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Yeah, but don’t tell her to put a bow in her hair because you’re just basically saying that you have to fake it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:44 AM Flag
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That's true... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:45 AM Flag
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NP she can always go to the office and go to the bathroom there in the nurse's office. I would tell her that if she really needs to go, she should go to the office and say she feels really sick and wants to use that bathroom. This kind of thing happens a lot (wanting to use the private bathroom). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:45 AM Flag
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GREAT idea. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:47 AM Flag
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So she shouldn’t fake it by putting on a hair clip, but it’s ok to pretend to be sick to cope? That’s not a good path to head down. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:30 PM Flag
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You must be really proud of her. It takes a strong backbone to march to your own drummer in middle school. Love her! S [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:49 AM Flag
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(oops don't know where the S came from) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:50 AM Flag
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I am SO proud of her and all grown-ups love her for who she is. It is just that she has to go through all of this to get to the other side. And she actually knows that she is awesome and unique but, still, other kids aren't there yet. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:52 AM Flag
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How old is she? does she identify as a girl? DO you have any reason to think she might not? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:40 AM Flag
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She identifies as a girl. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:42 AM Flag
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We have discussed and are open to any way she identifies, and she has said she identifies as a girl. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:43 AM Flag
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I think you are probably only getting part of the story here, but she may not be comfortable telling you more. I would not push her for more but I think you should probably get someone for her to talk to. Does your school have a GLBT+friends type of club? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:44 AM Flag
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Yes, they do. She thinks she is currently the only kid in the entire school like her. I will steer her towards that group. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:45 AM Flag
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My ds found that group to be very welcoming, with a great faculty sponsor, and he is not gay. She needs to find friends. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:46 AM Flag
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Thank you, I will look into it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:48 AM Flag
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my dd was not girly at all in 6th grade - this is really typical in fact. she did join her middle school LGBTQ group and liked it. now, cut to high school and oh boy, different story - completely different story. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.07.19, 01:03 AM Flag
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continued -all very girly clothes and lots of selfies! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.07.19, 01:04 AM Flag
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WOW. Ok, let's see what happens. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.11.19, 02:37 AM Flag
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so I would just stress to her that she should continue to use the girls room - (1) as time passes, more people at the new school will know she is a girl who identifies as a girl -- e.g., lean into the awkward - it gets less awkward as time goes on, (2) gender neutral bathrooms are a relatively new thing, but girls who dress in more boyish clothes actually isn't a new thing and have been using the girls room for years, and (3) holding it all day could be very unhealthy. good luck to her. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:49 AM Flag
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Thank you so much. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:50 AM Flag
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Agree with this. As she makes friends she can ask another girl to go with her to the bathroom. She can also ask a teacher during class when it is unlikely other kids will be in the bathroom. The teachers KNOW that the passing periods are ridiculously short. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:51 AM Flag
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Really nice advice. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:54 AM Flag
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What state/city are you in? My DD’s middle school is extremely supportive of all identities. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:26 AM Flag
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Bk, NYC. I think the school is VERY supportive, just need to find the right people. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:28 AM Flag
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She needs to just go to the bathroom. People know her name and know her gender. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:49 AM Flag
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My 10 year old is exactly the same. Completely identifies as a girl, but has short hair, wears blue and never wears jewelry. She gets mistaken for a boy all the time and even has people tell her that she's in the wrong bathroom. The difference is that she just doesn't give a crap. She actually gets a kick out of correcting people who confront her. Tell your daughter to be proud of herself for marching to the beat of her own drum and that it's other people who are idiots and not her. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 03:00 AM Flag
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Good for her, but seriously: after a few days of school, how can anybody not know that "Sarah Smith is a girl with short hair"? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:22 PM Flag
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then tell her to grow her hair out.. she sounds selfish for attention [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 11:21 AM Flag
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NP. No, not this. She sounds fine. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:16 PM Flag
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I call BS on this one. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.11.19, 02:41 AM Flag
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Get her ears pierced and let her wear pretty stud earrings. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:38 PM Flag
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Good idea. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:35 PM Flag
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If she goes to school with kids who know her so little that they don't even know her gender, that's something to think about. I suspect she may like drama. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:47 PM Flag
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Transitions to new schools are hard. She may just have to ride it out. I hated bathrooms in new schools, too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:17 PM Flag
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The person 2 cubicles over is a thin woman with a short, rather boyish haircut, and she's wearing a black jumpsuit, sneakers and no makeup. Nobody thinks she's a boy, and I'm still very unclear why the DD's short hair and athletic clothes are creating such an issue. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 03:57 PM Flag
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This woman probably has breasts? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.11.19, 02:38 AM Flag
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No, she's very thin, but we don't even need to get to that point. How can you not know the gender of a classmate or office mate? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.11.19, 12:10 PM Flag
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she needs a bit of help with what seems like anxiety. just boost her up and tell her to use the girls' room. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.07.19, 01:05 AM Flag
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Agree, she has anxiety. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.11.19, 02:40 AM Flag
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From my own personal experience with DD, I wonder if it's not a "Queen Bee" situation. There was this awful kid in 3rd grade who would basically set the rules on how her group should dress, and they would go after any other kid as it suited them that day. (And the teacher was no use: her answer was basically "well, why DOESN'T Lauren dress more like Jennifer?") There may be something going on here besides a haircut. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.11.19, 12:30 PM Flag
[ - ] My u yr old has very impacted earwax. It’s been itching her for a month. I previously thought the itch was a scratch that was healing, but I realize now the scratch came from attempting to scratch the REAL source of itch inside. The wax is deep in and looks black. Do I go to regular pediatrician or will an ear doctor be better at removing it. I actually just did this at the ear Dr and they had a suction device. I’m not doing drops, just looking for which type of dr is best for this...tua 13 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:38 AM Flag
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*7 yr old [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:38 AM Flag
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pediatrician can do this, just go there. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:40 AM Flag
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(It takes forEVER to get in with a pediatric ENT.) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:40 AM Flag
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Op: I didn’t realize ent had to be specialized for kids. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:46 AM Flag
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Yes but your ped should be able to pull the ear wax. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:19 AM Flag
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CVS minute clinics do this. https://www.cvs.com/minuteclinic/services/wellness-and-physicals/ear-wax-removal/N-d8Zbtk8Zd5 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:21 AM Flag
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Regular pediatrician can help you. Make sure it's not something worse like a foreign object. Has to be done now. A kid in our preK put a bead in their ear and it later became infected. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:50 AM Flag
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Regular pediatrician can help you. Make sure it's not something worse like a foreign object. Has to be done now. A kid in our preK put a bead in their ear and it later became infected. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:50 AM Flag
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Omg why have you let this go on for a month? This could lead to an infection. Any doctor can fix this. Go buy Debrox earwax removal drops to start breaking it up, and then the doctor will flush it out. I just had this happen to me, and only lasted a week before I went to the first doctor who would see me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 03:01 AM Flag
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OP she had a little scratch inside, and she kept picking it. i thought that was the sourse of the itching. i never hesitate to take her to the Dr. it looked like a scratch itching asi t troied to heal. in fact the itch was deeper in her ear, but she was unable to explain that. also the itch would come and go [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:00 PM Flag
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I've been prone to very impacted ear wax since I was a kid (I'm 50). If it is very dense, most gps (and pediatricians) aren't very good at extracting it. Try the softening drops and see. But you're better off taking him to an ENT. They have the correct more advanced equipment that make the extraction very easy and comfortable. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 03:41 AM Flag
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Bizarrely, I've learned that this is called "Asian ear wax" (My dd is adopted from China, and apparently it is quite common). Any ped's office, CVS minute clinic or urgent care can remove it. I send my DD down to the urgent care once a month to get her ears cleaned. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 05:13 AM Flag
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When my dd had this, the ped didn’t remove. She suggested drops that were a combo of hydrogen peroxide and water. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:20 PM Flag
[ - ] People with business sense I have a situation where I would be grateful for advice: I am the director of sales at a small company with a niche client market. Without my knowledge the owners hired an hourly salesperson to make cold calls for meetings. I am furious about the sneakiness of this as I run sales, but also this person has been getting them meetings with low level people on the buy side, while I know higher level people at the same buy side firms! In this industry even the high level people can’t be decision makers (their clients make the vendor hiring decisions), so a meeting with a low level person is really useless. Besides this being stupid to not communicate with me should I have a contact at the same client, I find this sneaky and I am angry. How would you handle? 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:34 AM Flag
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Focus on the inefficiency and civilly demand transparency for the business that you are accountable for. Prepare to leave. Are these second generation (or even worse, third) in the business? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:38 AM Flag
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No, start up. I bring in a lot of business, just often it makes sense if I take the meetings as they are not great at sales. They want the meetings it appears. How can I demand transparency? Need a good approach. Too furious to even speak to them tomorrow [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:41 AM Flag
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Can you truthfully say that you were talking to a contact at company XYZ who asked about convo with the cold call guy? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:49 AM Flag
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Possibly, but I’d have to hunt down this information. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:54 AM Flag
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Calm down and prepare what you want to say. Never go into a meeting that angry. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 04:56 AM Flag
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I'd question if they understand the sales cycle for your industry - given that they do not have contacts themselves. The fact they've brought in someone to cold call means they are impatient about sale progress. You need to either educate them on your current funnel, outlining how long it takes to close a deal, what your deal flow looks like and schedule regular meetings on sales progress. That they went behind your back for this does not bode well. You should question if you should take your book elsewhere. Working for people who don't get how to sell into a particular industry can be deeply frustrating. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 04:31 AM Flag
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Excellent advice thank you [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 10:27 AM Flag
[ - ] Does this seem like a tough schedule or average for 10th grade public school ? Honors English, Honors Spanish 5, AP world history, chemistry and algebra 2 ? 18 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:16 AM Flag
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Yes [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:17 AM Flag
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Yes, tough [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:30 AM Flag
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That sounds challenging. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:19 AM Flag
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Sounds like my 9th graders schedule minus the AP history [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:31 AM Flag
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^^^and change to bio honors [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:31 AM Flag
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your 9th grade is taking Honors Spanish 5? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:34 AM Flag
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What school ? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:46 AM Flag
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Average for a kid who is interested in a competitive college (my dd had the same schedule in 10th grade-but spanish 4, not 5). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:35 AM Flag
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that was pretty much my 10th graders except she took extra 2nd history class, chem was honors, and AP stats instead of Algebra 2 that she took year before. oh and I guess French was 4. so it looks fine to me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:38 AM Flag
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When did she take geometry? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:12 AM Flag
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8th grade [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:13 AM Flag
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obviously not nyc. No geometry here till 9th, not even at the citywide G&Ts.They think that algebra in 7th grade is worthless,too superficial. Even at Stuy. And none of the tt privates do it either, [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 04:28 AM Flag
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Wagner Math Honors has Geometry in 8th so kids in Algebra 2 by 9th [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 04:43 AM Flag
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OR correct not NYC, math curriculum (public school) where we live for the kids who need to get through calculus before graduating is Algebra 7th, Geometry 8th, Algebra 2 9th, AP Stats 10, Honors pre-calc 11, AP Calc AB or BC 12th [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:29 PM Flag
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Wagner is NYC [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 06:36 PM Flag
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I believe then that it is the only school in nyc that give Algebra in 7th. Neither NEST nor Anderson nor Christa McAuliffe do. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.07.19, 07:16 PM Flag
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AP stats is totally unnecessary for Calc, IMO. Also, in nyc, you have to take the Regents, and very few 7th graders could get 90+ on Algebra 1 Regent. Not all Algebra is equal. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.07.19, 07:15 PM Flag
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Seems about right for a college bound-kid. Slow Tuesday at SHS. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 06:49 PM Flag
[ - ] Why would a man wear a wedding band if he is not married? My boss does this and has never been married and is not gay. 18 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:10 AM Flag
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Because he does not want to get married? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:30 AM Flag
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Creep factor. Wants to appear married but has no intention of being sin any relationship. No one would have a partner and wear a ring that meant nothing. Red fkag [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:41 AM Flag
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My ring gives me a rash [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:41 AM Flag
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Op-he wears a band, so no rash I suppose...and not married [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:04 AM Flag
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Op-he wears a band, so no rash I suppose...and not married [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:04 AM Flag
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It’s too tight [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:15 AM Flag
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Could be an allergic reaction to one or metals in the alloy or it could be so tight that water is trapped between the ring and finger leading to a rash [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 03:02 AM Flag
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Yes, I’ve gotten a rash a few times during the hotter months when my finger swells up and the ring is tight and water gets trapped a little. Gets better when I take off the ring for a few days. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 11:56 AM Flag
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Op-any other thoughts [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:47 AM Flag
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He likes jewelry? Doesn't want women thinking he's single and throwing themselves at him? If it means so much to you, ask him. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:49 AM Flag
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I did and he sort of threw his hands up in the air and said “yeah I am not married and see I wear a ring for no reason”. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 03:02 AM Flag
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He's an enigma. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 03:12 AM Flag
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in some places a single older man is assumed to be less mature/stable than a married one. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 09:52 AM Flag
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Op-this is why am think he does it. He is a principal. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 04:17 PM Flag
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makes sense. he also will be meeting with moms and this will make the crazy possessive dads more OK with it [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 06:20 PM Flag
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same reason that i do. I don't want to get hit on. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 03:14 AM Flag
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He likes jewelry [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 05:49 AM Flag
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Maybe it was his dad's? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:30 PM Flag
[ - ] Do young women look at the shape of a guy's butt? Isn't it true that young women like a nice, firm butt, rather than a flat non-butt? Is this only a AA thing, or do a lot of white woman think this way? 14 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:49 AM Flag
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Oh boy... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:50 AM Flag
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You need more boi basket, cowbell and mesh shorts to get this one going [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:51 AM Flag
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Lol, right? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:52 AM Flag
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OP - I'm having a debate with my dh [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:54 AM Flag
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It all sounds very intellectual. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:02 AM Flag
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np: They sound more fun than many of the people here [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:07 AM Flag
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Affirmative Action? Yes. Women who look at men's butts have an advantage when it comes to college admissions. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:09 AM Flag
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Is this supposed to be funny? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:11 AM Flag
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Back in the day I did. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:14 AM Flag
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I always preferred skinny, flat butted, non-jock-y guys. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:39 AM Flag
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ewww. the complete opposite of the type of guy body i like. give me strong, muscular and jocky any day. i want a man who can lift me up and spin me around, including while having sex, lol. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 03:16 AM Flag
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OR: I'd expect an "ewwww" from someone who likes jocks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:20 PM Flag
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I really never thought about this that much but I did date a guy with a butt like you describe and I appreciated it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:49 AM Flag
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Old lady here - and yes. Muscular butt generally meant physically fit guy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 03:19 AM Flag
[ - ] What are your top 5 movies of all time? I was trying to think of what mine would be. 72 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:46 AM Flag
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The Piano, The Pianist, Jaws, Close Encounters, Bye Bye Birdie. I can go on and on. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:48 AM Flag
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OP - I think it would be Shawshank Redemption, Last of the Mohicans, Up, Memento, and Sound of Music. That list makes no sense when I see it together. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:49 AM Flag
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Lol [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:51 AM Flag
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^^^ it means you’re welrounded [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:51 AM Flag
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I would like you! I love all of those movies. Stay alive- no matter what the cost- I will find you [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:18 AM Flag
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Oh I would add Heaven can Wait. It is on now and it is just a fun light movie. Warren Beatty is so handsome [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.07.19, 12:56 AM Flag
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the thread I dreamed of but could not manage to compose [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:52 AM Flag
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haha [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 07:55 PM Flag
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Christmas Vacation, The Great Outdoors, Coming to America/Beverly Hills Cop (Tie on the Eddie Murphy Movies), This is 40, Aristocats (the disney cartoon not that other movie) but really anything with Chevy Chase, Eddie Murphy and I also love lots of the Disney cartoons. I live the pulp fiction, Wes Anderson type movies too but silly comedy is my favorite genre definitely. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:55 AM Flag
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Coming to America is one of my all time favorites. I wonder if it's held up. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:37 AM Flag
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They are making a sequel [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.07.19, 01:31 AM Flag
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The outtakes of Melissa MCCarthy at end of movie with her abusing the school principal make me cry with laughter. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:04 AM Flag
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I know these are not going to show up in a film class but I can watch them over and over and never stop loving them: Dead Poets Society, Dr Zhivago, Godfather 1&2, Anne of Green Gables (the mini-series from the 80s), Brooklyn [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:01 AM Flag
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Shindlers list. Baby boom. Wedding crashers. Ray. Titanic. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:06 AM Flag
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Steel Magnolias, Goodfellas, Breakfast Club, Forrest Gump, It's A wonderful Life [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:09 AM Flag
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Monty Python & holy grail. Young Frankenstein. Princess bride. Gone with the wind. This is spinal tap. I know. I’m weird. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:10 AM Flag
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i agree with at least two of those [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:13 AM Flag
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it is interesting -- i am not sure my top 5 are necessarily the movies I think are best, but movies that either at a particular point touched something in me emotionally or that I always watch when on -- Chariots of Fire, Field of Dreams, Gods and Generals, Kingdom of Heaven and Dazed and Confused (I know) or Star Wars/A New Hope. (FWIW, I actually much prefer television shows to movies - I just like a longer story). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:11 AM Flag
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Gladiator, Family Man, The Matrix, Tommy Boy, Dead Poets Society [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:17 AM Flag
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just rewatched Gladiator the other day for the first time since seeing in theater when it was released, totally enjoyed it all over again [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:21 AM Flag
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+ [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 07:55 PM Flag
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Animal House, Anchorman, Almost Famous, Sound of Music, The Big Chill [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:19 AM Flag
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Plus Best In Show! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:20 AM Flag
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Beauty and the Beast (cartoon), Coming to America, Dirty Dancing, Willy Wonka and Can't buy me love. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:33 AM Flag
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Oh wait, I need Grease on my list! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:33 AM Flag
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Godfather, Goodfellas, 25th Hour, Before the Devil Knows You’re Dead, Swimming Pool [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:36 AM Flag
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Magnolia, Crash, Godfather, The Way We Were, Walk the Line, American Beauty, American History X, Heat. I know there are others, perhaps better, but these are off the top of my head and they are my top of they rival my top. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:38 AM Flag
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^ love, actually is pretty freaking good too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:38 AM Flag
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ILY for mentioning, even on an anonymous board I was a little afraid to but in truth it makes me happy/teary every freaking time [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:41 AM Flag
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:) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:44 AM Flag
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Np- same:j [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:05 AM Flag
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oh Walk the Line good call, so well done [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:41 AM Flag
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Totally agree. Joaquin Phoenix is just ridiculous in that movie. I have so much respect for him as an actor. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:45 AM Flag
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^ add LA Confidential [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:43 AM Flag
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Wow, except for The Way We Were, this is the exact list of an ex-bf of mine. Kind of eerie. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:22 PM Flag
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Interesting! In many of these movies, I like how the various storylines come together. I imagine if he likes the same thing, he’d be attracted to the same movies. I also prefer dramas and I love music, and many of these movies have pretty substantial soundtracks. I’m 42. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.07.19, 03:22 AM Flag
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Princess Bride, Goodfellas, Steel Magnolias, Animal House and Fish Called Wanda [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:53 AM Flag
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Arizona Dream, Time of the Gypsies, Melancholia, Requiem for a Dream, Bullets Over Broadway. It's difficult to pick just 5, I realized I like most works of some directors such as Emir Kusturica, Lars von Trier or Darren Aronofsky. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:01 AM Flag
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Black Cat, White Cat is BONKERS [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:18 AM Flag
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Requiem for a Dream is a movie I wish I could unsee. It has disturbed me for years! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 07:57 PM Flag
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Would never admit this IRL: Out of Africa, Elf, Bridget Jones’ Diary, the Sandlot, Hannah and her Sisters [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:01 AM Flag
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Elf, lol [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 08:22 PM Flag
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i Can’t limit it to 5. I like too many movies. For example I loved Beaches, terms of endearment, coming to America before college (I think) along with memento, sixteen candles, Christmas story, Indiana Jones among many others but I don’t know if I’d like some of these as much if I watched them again [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:09 AM Flag
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Godfather, The Matrix, Beauty and the Beast cartoon, Shawshank redemption,The Notebook- this are movies I will always watch. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:23 AM Flag
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I just saw the Matrix in the theater (in Dolby bla bla bla) and it was AMAZING again. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:37 AM Flag
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It was such an original. My DH and I have watched it so many time. I bet it would be great to see it in a theater again. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:40 AM Flag
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It was so funny, we kind of stumbled on it but there were so many people in the theater who had been looking forward for a while. Lots of cheering and screaming. All good though. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:42 AM Flag
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The Hours, Sense & Sensibility, The Godfather, Harvey, LA Confidential [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:28 AM Flag
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My initial pass: Rear Window, Casablanca, All About Eve, Grand Illusion. Looking over Oscar nominees for what I might have forgotten, these always hit the spot: ET, Babe, Sideways, Raiders of the Lost Arc, Star Wars Episode IV [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:36 AM Flag
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^ and the Matrix! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:37 AM Flag
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^ The cold war. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:47 AM Flag
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I loved A Christmas Carol (the really old black & white one), Close Encounters, Book Smart, About A Boy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:53 AM Flag
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+ [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 07:54 PM Flag
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Purple Rain, About Last Night, Love Jones, Jurassic Park, The English Patient [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 03:17 AM Flag
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You were born in the early 70s [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 05:52 AM Flag
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Close! Born in 68! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 08:29 PM Flag
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1. Office Space; 2. Thomas Crowne Affair; 3. Friday; 4. National Lampoon Vacation; 5. Dumb and Dumber [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 03:34 AM Flag
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I love office space! Yeah, uh, yeah. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 10:04 AM Flag
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If these are on, I will watch: last of the Mohicans, a few good me, godfather 1&2, a room with a view, parent trap (original and remake), the cutting edge, These are just off the top of my head. Love these flicks! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 04:49 AM Flag
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+ [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 07:55 PM Flag
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Such a range throughout the years—16 Candles, Gattica, Match Point, Bladerunner (the original), Bugsy Malone. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 10:57 AM Flag
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Dirty Dancing; Star Wars: a New Hope (original cut); Princess Bride; Robin Hood (1937 Errol Flynn version); Singin in the Rain [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 11:07 AM Flag
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Brain Candy, Chinatown, the Squid and the Whale, Paris is Burning, a Buddhist film called Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter, Spring [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 11:30 AM Flag
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this is hard but this is reminding me of so many greats. The ones I can watch over and over again: coming to America, can’t buy me love, dirty dancing for sure. I haven’t seen in a while but I loved Borat when it came out I just don’t know if it belongs in the same category. My all time favorites have to be comedies that I can watch over and over. There are some other greats (Shawshank For example) but I don’t really have a desire to see again [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:20 PM Flag
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Gone with the wind, Like water for hot chocolate, Grease, Don Juan de Marco, Sex, lies & videotape. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 06:31 PM Flag
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^^add Terminator 2 and History of the world. I'll be attracting some low-brow guys for sure. Thank God DH is really smart but doesn't care much about movies. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 06:47 PM Flag
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Where is the Friend's House; The White Balloon; In the Street; Grand Illusion; L'Atalante [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 07:12 PM Flag
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The Commitments, Pitch Perfect, Metropolitan, Before Sunrise, and Pretty in Pink [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 07:52 PM Flag
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Also Empire Strikes Back and Sing Street [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 07:56 PM Flag
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Easier for me to do 5 from childhood first: In Search of the Castaways, My Side of the Mountain, Dark Crystal, Flight of the Navigator, Cocoon... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 07:57 PM Flag
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Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle, the original version of The Producers, A New Leaf, Truly, Madly, Deeply, Three Days of the Condor. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 08:20 PM Flag
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The Sound of Music, Casablanca, The Lord of the Rings (can I count that as 1?), Star Wars, Spirited Away [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 08:23 PM Flag
[ - ] anyone ever go on family vacation to belize? long shot, but we thinking about doing an eco resort there this winter with 10 year old, any recommendations? 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:41 AM Flag
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We have done that with older DCs (teens), three times. Loved it. Did beach vacations though not inland. Kids beg to return every year. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:54 AM Flag
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oh good! Did you stay at a resort or just rent a house on beach? We want to do beach too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:56 AM Flag
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We did a resort on Ambergris Caye- had a condo-hotel feel (still had restaurants, room service, concierge etc but you had a kitchen and apartment. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:02 AM Flag
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Where did you stay? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:56 AM Flag
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https://www.grandcaribebelize.com There are now a few newer ones. On the mainland, Hamanasi looks very nice. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:03 AM Flag
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and Hamanasi would be a better fit for eco-resort. If we do a mainland rather than inland trip we'd try that. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:03 AM Flag
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>island [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:04 AM Flag
[ - ] So glad I don't live in the suburbs anymore (at least for this reason). Had to go to Bushwick after work; desperately needed a manicure; came back to UES at 7:30 (when everything in the 'burbs is closed) and got a manicure!! Happy vent over. 18 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:40 AM Flag
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I totally understand [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:42 AM Flag
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Thank you! All my "me" errands got shoved to precious Saturdays when I lived in the suburbs. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:02 AM Flag
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I so get this post. It’s the little things :). What color did you choose? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:50 AM Flag
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She's Pampered (not so much for the name but I like a brighter red). Picasso Nails. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:01 AM Flag
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Well, that is certainly worth living in a box and paying an arm and leg for education, rather than a comfortable home and yard, and get a great public school for free. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:51 AM Flag
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Do you live in the burbs? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:53 AM Flag
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defensive much? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:56 AM Flag
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I'm so sick of the burb bashing. "I'm so glad I don't live in the suburbs...." [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:05 AM Flag
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If you were happy with your own choices you wouldn't care what some random stranger said on UB [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:08 AM Flag
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Because it's most of you, most of the time, expressing some feeling of superiority. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:10 AM Flag
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I'm not the pp and don't care what other people do. See how paranoid you are [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:52 AM Flag
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yeah, paranoid [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:30 AM Flag
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URBAN baby [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:30 AM Flag
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NP: I find the size of my apartment quite comfortable, send kids to a great public for free, and who wants to maintain a yard anyway? And if I need something after the sun goes down, like a manicure, I'm happy it will be there. All I'm saying is, to each her own. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:00 AM Flag
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OP here. I totally get it. For me it's a surprise bonus of moving back to the city after 50. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:10 AM Flag
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OP here. I'm old. Our kids are 23-26. Sorry if I should have made that clear in my post. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:03 AM Flag
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We moved back too when our kids were in middle school. I love not having to drive everywhere, and having a doorman to receive packages. My kids love being able to be independent and take the subway everywhere. Each to his own. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 11:56 AM Flag
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For some reason this post made me feel incredibly happy for you. And I live (happily) in the exurbs of a flyover city - grew up in UB land, though. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:26 PM Flag
[ - ] Pros and Cons of joining a PTA/being Class Rep for your DC’s school (it is a Citywide G&T) are..... 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:38 AM Flag
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pros_ you get to know the teachers and staff and I was able to gently request a teacher for next year. You get to know more parents con you see behind the curtain and it is usually a mess [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:43 AM Flag
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+1. Get to make some decisions as class rep regarding what type of special events and when. Con: crazy parents emailing requesting you take action on all kinds of trivial things. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:55 AM Flag
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SO true or telling you what was wrong with your event that they didn't lift a hand to help with [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:24 AM Flag
[ - ] How much did you pay PP for your wedding? Where was it held? 23 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:38 AM Flag
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who's PP? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:40 AM Flag
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Per person [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:41 AM Flag
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We got married in our apartment and had a spread of food for family. That was a long time ago so it was around $200 worth of food. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:41 AM Flag
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Also the year would help [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:42 AM Flag
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Private country club in Nassau $160 pp. All seafood-Lobster, shrimp, clams, crab, anything your heart desires at a 1.5hr cocktail hour. 2005. This was member pricing. Now it is almost $400 a person plus a huge site fee which we did not have to pay. Also we did not have to pay tips for the waiters, as told by the banquet hall manager. It was a steal. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:47 AM Flag
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Your reception was only an hour and a half? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:07 AM Flag
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Sounds like a pre dinner cocktail hour and a half. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:47 AM Flag
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Yes pre dinner cocktail hr [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.07.19, 03:01 PM Flag
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We got married on the beach in front of our house in the Caribbean. We only had 16 guests. They sat on fallen trees, so we didn't even rent chairs. The cost was the reception dinner. I think it was about $70/pp for dinner and booze. 2001 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:52 AM Flag
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185pp tribeca grand 12 years ago [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:55 AM Flag
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$125-140? Something like that. 2001. Cambridge, MA Hotel. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:09 AM Flag
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$200-220/pp. 2003. Garden City Hotel. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:41 AM Flag
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^ in hindsight, a stupid use of money [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:41 AM Flag
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I'm always shocked how people pay for this stuff. My parents gave us 50K for a downpayment instead, in 1998. We got married at City Hall and took 20 people to lunch at the Gotham. Apt is now worth $2.3 m. And we are artists, so if we had had an expensive wedding, we'd have nada now. I just spoke to a friend who paid 100K for both her kids' bar mitzvah, and now her dh has lost his job and they are desperate. Seems to sad to me that people blow all this $ on a single day of getting ripped off by the event industry. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:36 AM Flag
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OR: I have money. You assume I don’t. I still think it was a waste. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 11:53 AM Flag
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^ also the attraction for my parents (who paid) was the opportunity to throw a big party. So it’s not like they would have just given me the cash. In any event, they are very comfortable; I am very comfortable. I was just thinking in a perfect world, it wouldn’t be used for better things like helping someone / changing someone’s life. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 11:55 AM Flag
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^ if would*** be used for better things ! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 11:56 AM Flag
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155. Looking at 170 or more for dcs mar mitzvah [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:56 AM Flag
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$51. Lunch at Carmine's. Regular catering deal was $41 for 2.5 hours -- we splurged on an extra ten bucks per capita to bring it to three hours. Twas two blocks from the church. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:07 AM Flag
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2001 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:02 PM Flag
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$110/pp. Beachfront hotel in NJ. 2014. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 03:03 AM Flag
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$85 (I think), Columbia University faculty club. 1990. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 03:04 AM Flag
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Nice spot. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:29 PM Flag
[ - ] To mom looking for a college that is not alternative like Sarah Lawrence and Bard, DD got into both with similar grades. Think about Conn College. They are building a new theater, and are really strong in the arts but not alternative. Seems to be a nice mix of kids. I think its a hidden gem, people dont often think about 21 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:01 AM Flag
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Interesting, I am not sure why there are no kids from DDS private school who go there. The counselors never suggest Conn. We toured it was a beautiful campus, nice kids. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:02 AM Flag
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It’s a lovely school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:18 AM Flag
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Way back, in the days of the Seven Sisters, it was a well known, well thought of, upper class choice for those not quite intellectual enough for the SS. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:21 AM Flag
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Just posted something similar below! Agree. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:25 AM Flag
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(But do not have personal evidence to support the less intellectual part. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:27 AM Flag
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Not saying that the student body was not intellectual. Just as that it was an easier admit than the SS colleges back in the day when they were first choice of private school girls. It was considered a good school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:30 AM Flag
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My late stepmother wanted to go the Columbia and got in during the late 60s political unrest, and her father insisted that she attend Conn College instead. It was well-respected and had a seven sisters-like reputation. I had a visiting position at the Coast Guard Academy across the street about 20 years ago and loved to use their library. Good luck! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:23 AM Flag
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That would have been Barnard College. Columbia didn’t admit women itself till ( I think) @ 1983 ( last Ivy to go coed. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:32 AM Flag
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Yes, I stand corrected. The story included the Columbia campus in 1969, so that is how it remained in memory. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:04 AM Flag
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Yes, I believe Barnard was always affiliated with Columbia in some manner, although an independent women’s college to an extent, (and physically right next door) so events at. Columbia were pretty much also events at Barnard. Was just nitpicking (sorry). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:18 AM Flag
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Not sure it's relevant because we're in our 40s, but I have some friends who went to Conn College and they're all really great, successful, grounded people. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:04 AM Flag
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One of the finest women I have ever known in a Conn College alumna. I would be thrilled for my DD to wind up to there when the time comes. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 03:53 AM Flag
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Funny, a couple of young people at my work, went to Conn and they are great kids. Much nicer than the IVY kids and actually , much better workers [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:44 PM Flag
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Most people think its UConn. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:44 PM Flag
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No they don’t. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 05:15 PM Flag
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Actually they do. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 06:47 PM Flag
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Among the old money people who are familiar with Conn College’s fine reputation from way back, nobody confuses it with U Conn. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 09:50 PM Flag
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No more than informed people confuse NYU with State U of NY. Which is to say not very often. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 10:11 PM Flag
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Or U of Michigan w Michigan State. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 10:11 PM Flag
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They also get that nice mix partly by offering generous merit money. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:30 PM Flag
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Yes my DD got really good merit money for all four years. She had an offer from a more note worthy school on this board. But it was a lot of money [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 04:02 PM Flag
[ - ] I'm the extra hot latte poster. Last night, I got really sick with trembling, terrible headache and nausea. Trembling and headache got better after throwing up everything inside my stomach. During that time, DH got up when I started to throw up and brought me painkillers for headache after I asked, then went back right to sleep. In the morning I didn't see him. Throughout the day, he didn't reach out ask if I'm feeling better. If I would complain that he didn't ask, he would tell me how hard he's working and doing so much for us. If I insist then he'll bring up that we're not having sex for the last 2 weeks so he's resentful so he has a right to act the way he acts. I feel emotionally so alone. Thanks for reading my vent. 15 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:37 PM Flag
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DH: He may just assume that you're doing better, since he hasn't heard otherwise. I don't know your guy of course, and his blaming ignoring you on your not having sex is obviously BS and not OK (if he actually were to do this, which he hasn't today, right?), but you're not giving him the benefit of the doubt or assuming best intentions on his part... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:40 PM Flag
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I know you know this (I was you), you deserve better. I'm sorry. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:44 PM Flag
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I’m sorry you are going through this. This sounds like my ex DH. My DH now would never treat me this way. I’m so sorry. Hope you feel better soon. And you need to have a serious talk with you DH. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:28 AM Flag
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My DH did exactly the same thing to me. Sound asleep all night in b d next to me while I puked, moaned and shivered and sweated with high fever. His excuse? “ I was sleepy” [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:27 AM Flag
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op: I didn't even say anything about his continuing to sleep while I was very sick in bed. If I would say anything he would say he had to get up early while I could sleep in the morning. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:11 AM Flag
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So sorry. What I don’t understand is HOW they are able to go on sleeping in these circumstances? Because not matter how sleepy I am, I could not possibly sleep while a life vid one was in the room suffering. I know this from experience of taking care of loved ones over many years. How do they do it? It’s a baffling mystery. And how do they resist what would be for us the urgent need to be there the next day, or at the very least arrange for care and call to check up? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:33 AM Flag
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^^^Loved one, not life vid. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:34 AM Flag
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I think the answer is the meaning of "loved one". they don't love the way a normal person loves, it is narcissistic love. they only love you as long as you're a tool to make them feel better and superior about themselves. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:42 AM Flag
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Oh my. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:45 AM Flag
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sam vaknin will explain better: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8h2xuuxWIKk [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:45 AM Flag
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He’s always making you feel not important. I’m sorry that sucks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:29 AM Flag
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I'll be honest here. You sound like hard work. You are very needy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 02:44 AM Flag
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Agree. OP also should have sex with her hubby. Otherwise he will find it elsewhere. Then she will be on here complaining about him cheating on her. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 03:32 AM Flag
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op: yes, that's what I'm doing for years and I am at a point where I have no career, no financial power, no self-esteem left. Please don't make other people feel bad about themselves when they are the recipients of emotional abuse. Better yet, learn about emotional abuse if you're so inclined to be judgmental about others. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 03:40 AM Flag
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Get a divorce. You are obviously very unhappy. Take control of your life and stop bitching about how awful your husband is. He doesn't sound like a prize and neither do you. Maybe if you two are away from each other living your own lives you'll be happier. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 04:01 AM Flag
[ - ] I’m using someone from Handy to put a bed together tomorrow. Do I tip the guy? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:29 PM Flag
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how much are you paying? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:31 PM Flag
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$140 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:23 AM Flag
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of course [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:06 AM Flag
[ - ] A guy I am trying to impress just asked me what my five favorite movies are - either currently or all-time. Please tell me yours because I am drawing a blank and trying not to tell him shit like "Diner" and "Goodfellas" but also don't want to say "Joy Luck Club" or "Parenthood" ... help! 128 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:16 PM Flag
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My DH loves Diner. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:19 PM Flag
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Every guy does. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:21 PM Flag
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why? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:48 PM Flag
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Have you seen it? What did you think? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:56 PM Flag
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OR: I've tried watching it but I find it boring [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:29 AM Flag
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Because it is 100% from a man's perspective. Its all about male friendships and the women are treated really badly. Not that men specifically like to see women treated badly, but if the roles in the movie were reversed, NO MAN would like this movie. Its got some great scenes, amazing dialogue and acting, but it is practically anti-feminist. See it again, and you'll see. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:12 AM Flag
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I should give it another try. sounds interesting. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:33 AM Flag
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Lol. I don't want to watch it with new eyes. I want the bickering over the sandwich to be preserved forever. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:47 AM Flag
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That’s the best scene of course. And the piano scene at the burlesque place [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:30 AM Flag
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The Ponderosa looked faked! Hardly recognized little Joe! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:40 AM Flag
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Why not tell the truth, and get to know each other? Why are you trying so hard to impress him? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 10:28 AM Flag
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Because we now seek the "right" answer, or the trendy one vs the truth. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 06:00 PM Flag
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My bad. I forgot. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 08:38 PM Flag
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DIner was excellent and critically acclaimed.Goodfellas is on everyone's list. Be honest. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:21 PM Flag
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here https://www.imdb.com/list/ls053251213/ [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:24 PM Flag
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Why not just tell him your actual 5 favorite movies? Like, the 5 movies you like the most? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:21 PM Flag
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DH here: FFS, this is the ONLY right answer. What's wrong with you?! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:28 PM Flag
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OP. So OK I'll ask - if you were looking to date after a 1st marriage, what answers to this question would make you NOT want to date her? Would you seriously consider any woman who said "EAT PRAY LOVE" or would you look twice if she said Moneyball? I've never seen the first or read the book but the book was better than the movie in the 2nd case. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:39 PM Flag
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DH responder here. There's no right or wrong answer. My wife and I have only moderate overlap in movie taste (we agree on spy flicks, superhero movies, and good sci-fi), but that's never been an issue. I'm glad to watch wacky movies that I'd never have seen, and she's the same. If you're a huge fan of a type of movie, own it. If your taste is ecclectic, own it. It's all good. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:45 PM Flag
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This. I may be the only person in the world who hates pulp fiction and happily married to a huge Tarantino fan. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:51 PM Flag
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NP I think there's probably a huge gender divide on Pulp Fiction. When it came out, I bought a ticket for Saturday afternoon then went about my errands. When I got back to the theater the ticket holders' line was all college age white guys. I almost didn't go in, because I assumed I would hate it (but I'm cheap, so I went in and enjoyed it). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:59 PM Flag
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I'm OP. I liked Pulp Fiction. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:28 AM Flag
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I hated it. So boring [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:27 AM Flag
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thanks. Maybe I'm overthinking it. I should probably know this by now, but I was alarmed by my initial list because I realized they were either strong female protagonist movies or they were "Band of Brothers" type situations where it might look like I'm pandering. But maybe just be honest. Although, I did that in my first marriage and my ex always made fun of me for the movies I liked. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:52 PM Flag
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DH: Playful teasing about taste in arts is fun ... when playful. Just be yourself. If he's a jerk, always good to get that out in the open so you can not waste your time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:58 PM Flag
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thank you, you are sweet. At heart I know you are right. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:13 AM Flag
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DH: You're welcome! good luck, have fun, and enjoy! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:17 AM Flag
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if you areant honest then you will have a lame relationship. My DH likes period movies. I hate them. We joke about it. If i had said i loved them, then we are constantly watching them and i lie my whole life? Be honest! What would you think of a man that pretended to like "Eat Pray Love" to impress you? Wouldnt you find that gross? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 12:15 AM Flag
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This. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:28 PM Flag
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This. He wants to find out what you're like. Unless it's some weird test, in which case, you don't want to be with him, anyway. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:30 PM Flag
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OP. OK I totally get this, and I love Goodfellas, but I'll be honest, it doesn't lend anything to telling someone about what you're like. Everyone likes Goodfellas. It's a fantastic movie, almost perfectly shot. It's as useful as telling someone you liked the Godfather. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:36 PM Flag
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You're wrong - not everyone likes it, and not everyone who likes it would think to list it. Same for Godfather of course. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:37 PM Flag
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Who does not like Goodfellas? I'm gonna need that bad review to believe this. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:39 PM Flag
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I'm not crazy about Goodfellas. Didn't have much story arc, imo -- the bad guys stayed bad guys, etc. Love The Godfather though -- I would put that on a list if a man asked me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:40 PM Flag
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Most people aren't film critics, as you may have noticed. A lot of people never saw it and have no interest in "mob movies" [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:41 PM Flag
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It's better than that, but ok. Maybe I should mention it, if I have this position, though, lol. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:44 PM Flag
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Right! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:45 PM Flag
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np. I never saw it, have no interest in seeing it. I've never seen the Godfather movies either, just clips. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.05.19, 11:56 PM Flag
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I liked Goodfellas a lot, but I wouldn't want to rewatch it often. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 01:33 PM Flag
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I didn't and I tend to like gangster movies. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.06.19, 04:48 PM Flag
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To jog your memory look up old lists on the Oscars website or the AFI list of the top 100 or something. [ Reply | More
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Gene