UrbanBaby

06.12.20, 18:56 PM General Topics
10 replies

10-year-old DD developed a habit of touching her eyes--almost like a tic at the beginning of the school year. Her dad and I divorced a year ago but are on very good terms, in general, we have a low-stress household. She came back from two days at ex DH's house and has no eyelashes--she picked them all out. Any BTDT or what would you do? She doesn't want to go to therapy and is generally a happy, well-adjusted kid. [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
General Topics 06.12.20, 06:56 PM Flag

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Wow! I did the exact same thing at that age and my parents are divorced also. I didn't realize other did it too. I had some anxiety about living with my stepmom and developed this bad habit as a coping method. Sounds like you have talked to her, but may want to probe a little deeper if she will open up. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.12.20, 07:03 PM Flag

So funny you say that because ex DH said to me that he thought it might have to do with his gf. She's not a stepmom yet, but she lives with him and DD is around the gf a lot. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.12.20, 07:09 PM Flag

pp: interesting! I think this could be it. I will share that the experience of having someone live with you who is not your parent, can be challenging, even they are the nicest person. She probably knows that her dad loves her unconditionally, but kids can feel that a non-parent does not necessarily feel the same way about them. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.12.20, 07:12 PM Flag

Did you get therapy or anything or naturally outgrew the hair pulling? [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.12.20, 07:10 PM Flag

pp: I did not get therapy. I naturally outgrew it. It lasted for 6-12 months. Growing my confidence helped. And joining a sport. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.12.20, 07:19 PM Flag

She has trichotillomania. It is a lot more common than you would think. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.12.20, 08:09 PM Flag

+1. My cousin has it, started at 8 with eyebrows. She is 30 now, and has been bald for most of her life-- as you can imagine, the hair loss led to a host of issues in school she might not of otherwise had. I would advise you to find a therapist NOW who deals with hair pulling. There are behavioral therapies to help stop. Think of it like smoking- it's an impulsive/compulsive act and it could have very dire consequences down the road. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.12.20, 08:13 PM Flag

I know someone whose DD did this, it was at a time when there was a lot of stress and anxiety in the family. I would say that therapy is the best route, she needs help developing healthier ways to manage the anxiety, I would not leave the choice up to her although obviously she can decide who is the right fit. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.12.20, 08:11 PM Flag

This. It happens. Divorce is a huge stressor. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.12.20, 08:31 PM Flag

Find a therapist trained in OCD. Trichotillomania is a subset. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.12.20, 08:47 PM Flag