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06.06.20, 17:13 PM General Topics
12 replies
DH is depressed and has been for many years. He has basically refused treatment- except for when I give him an ultimatum and he goes for three sessions with a therapist and comes up with an excuse to stop. Understandably it is worse in this time without leaving the house or weekly socializing- and harder on our entire family because he is irritable and just wants to stay in a dark room watching TV for hours. He has a few good hours each day and can be a great father and husband- but there is no way of knowing how many hours or when it will switch. I’m heartbroken and at a loss about what to do. [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
General Topics 06.06.20, 05:13 PM Flag
 

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I'm sorry. dh is bipolar and I am intimately familiar with the story. right now mine is manic and mean so I I would trade places. sigh. You could issue an ultimatum but it is unlikely to work. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.06.20, 05:24 PM Flag
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I’m so sorry to hear that. How do you cope? Do your friends or family know? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.06.20, 06:27 PM Flag
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yes. they know. I have spared my parents from the worst of it because they would be heartbroken, but they know. I have a therapist too that keeps me from the abyss. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.06.20, 07:25 PM Flag
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I separated from mine. It was the best decision for the children and I. I felt like I was drowning with him. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.06.20, 06:01 PM Flag
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How did he take it? What happened with custody? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.06.20, 06:26 PM Flag
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Refuses meds too? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.06.20, 06:08 PM Flag
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OP: Absolutely. Gets angry if I even mention it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.06.20, 06:26 PM Flag
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I'm sorry. Both DH and I have been depressed and although we tried a few therapists, we didn't have good experience. We should probably try harder. But medication has helped. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.06.20, 06:51 PM Flag
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I wouldn't let someone drag me and my kids down because they refuse to be an adult. Lock yourself in a room for a day or two, see what his response is. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.06.20, 06:40 PM Flag
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You have problems of a different kind. This DH has a disease. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.06.20, 11:00 PM Flag
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That's just unacceptable. I get that when depressed, people are unmotivated - but at some point you have to take some personal responsibility for your life. If not by getting outside help, then at least by taking care of the things you can control - food, sleep, exercise, alcohol. I'd seriously consider cutting ties with someone who won't even take basic steps to make changes. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.06.20, 06:48 PM Flag
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Mine finally got bad enough that he listened to my weak ultimatum on meds. It’s has made a world of difference. Maybe he needs you to let him hit rock bottom. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.06.20, 08:42 PM Flag
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