UrbanBaby

06.03.08, 10:37 AM General Topics
13 replies

How would you feel if your parents (in their mid-50s) decided to adopt a special needs child? [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
General Topics 06.03.08, 10:37 AM Flag

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I don't know. I would probably be concerned for the child since my parents messed up the first time around... [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.03.08, 10:38 AM Flag

I'd be concerned about the long term prospects. My parents are very practical, so I'm sure they'd make a plan for down the road. I think it's a great idea. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.03.08, 10:41 AM Flag

stunned. but that's because fo who they are. it seems more like soemting my IL's woudl do [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.03.08, 10:42 AM Flag

OP: surprised no one mentioned feeling a little concerned for dc (their grandchildren) Im sure mine will get plenty of attn, but cant help but feeling like relationship wont be as strong [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.03.08, 10:45 AM Flag

Love doesnt run out. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.03.08, 10:49 AM Flag

wow. That sounds incredibly selfish. Some poor kid is going to have a much better life now and perhaps will enrich the lives of you and your dcs too. Caring for a SN child or ill adult can be a lot of work, but it can also bring many rewards. Try to look at it as an opportunity for your kids (and you too) [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.03.08, 10:49 AM Flag

op: i agree it sounds selfish-it feels selfish-im trying to work it out-its like a rollercoaster-I look at all the positives but then i get these selfish feelings- i cant mention to my parents b/c im so embarrassed by my selfish feelings [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.03.08, 10:52 AM Flag

I'm glad you can admit that. It's probably a somewhat normal reaction. I have had some not so nice emotions regarding my mom's new boyfriend (Dad died a couple of years ago) Changes like this can be scary and strange, but I'll bet if you focus on the positive aspects of it, you will adjust. Your parents sound like amazing people and I'm sure they have enough love for all of you. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.03.08, 10:56 AM Flag

I think that is a silly and selfcentered concern. That's like feeling sorry for kids from big families, grandkids where there are a lot of grandkids. Sure, an only child or only grandchild gets more attention, but who feels sorry for kids b/c they have siblings and cousins? To me the only legitimate concern is planning for this new child's future. If you don't want to be responsible for this child when your parents die, make sure they know that. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.03.08, 10:52 AM Flag

so in your mind "only children" are loved the most, then... what? The love decreases down to like those crazy big Irish Catholic families who don't care about their kids (especially the younger ones) at all? [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.03.08, 10:52 AM Flag

your kids will benefit from the relationship with the sn child as much if not more than if the grandparents didn't have other children, plus, love doesn't just get divided among whoever is there. I don't love my 2nd kid at 50%. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.03.08, 10:55 AM Flag

i know, its just such an adjustment [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.03.08, 10:56 AM Flag

I would think it was a great thing to do. I think about something like that - eventually. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.03.08, 10:46 AM Flag