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06.01.08, 18:57 PM Toddler
16 replies
Playground etiquette question - if your toddler is playing with a toy and another kid takes it but no parent/nanny intervenes, what do you do? I always encourage sharing generally, especially with friends, but don't want to send the message that it's ok for other people to push you around. [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
Toddler 06.01.08, 06:57 PM Flag
 

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If your child is too young to ask for it back, ask for her: "Jane was playing with that toy. Please give it back to her. When she's done, you can have a turn." If she's old enough, encourage her to say the same thing for herself. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 06:58 PM Flag
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I have done this, but often the other kid will not give it back. Today, the parent was watching and didn't say anything so I had nothing to say but sometimes this happens and you are a good sharer but the other kid is not. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 07:00 PM Flag
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This usually works for me. I have a very firm tone. I also hold out my hand for the child to give me the toy. If the child still didn't give it back, I would directly ask the caregiver to help out. Sure, children grab other children's toys, but it's our jobs as adults to show them that's not right. We shouldn't be mean about it, but we should correct. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 07:03 PM Flag
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If kid takes it, I would intervene. If taken in a nasty way, I would take the toy back an explain that he has to ask first. (THis usually makes the other kid run.) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 06:59 PM Flag
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Maybe my mistake then - I always try to get it back or encourage dc to get it back, but I never like to physically take stuff from other kids, [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 07:02 PM Flag
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I can see what you mean...but I've never had to "yank". Generally if I walk up to the situation, the kid is so flabbergasted they tend to just hand it over. I guess it depends on the exact age and situation. But I'm a big fan of intervening when other parents aren't going to bother. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 07:05 PM Flag
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right, I would just take it back. You can't count on an unattended 2 year old to give back the toy because its the right thing to do. In the end, do what's best for YOUR child. Model correct behavior, then block your child's view and rip the toy from the other kids hands. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 07:05 PM Flag
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depends on how old the other kid is. If older and takes it directly out of my kids hand i make them give it back and say they can have a turn later. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 07:02 PM Flag
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Unless there's a threat of physical danger to either kid- I let them work it out- [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 07:05 PM Flag
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my experience is that any interaction between two 2-y-o's there is always threat of physical danger. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 07:09 PM Flag
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See I expect my kids to be able to play with the toys that we bought, so I won't let other kids grab it. I say no and ask that they give it back. If the child is not attended I say something like : Thats ours, you need to ask your mommy if she has any buckets" [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 07:09 PM Flag
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op - that's what I mean. Sharing with friends is something totally different, if someone comes over for a playdate you must expect to share your toys. But I don't actually think it's fair to force your child to share a toy he is playing with with a stranger. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 07:11 PM Flag
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I completely agree, it is different when you are the playground or the pool. The kids are often strangers and why should they get to play with a bucket that your DC was having fun with??? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 07:15 PM Flag
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Hmm, I'll weigh in on both sides. Taking a toy your child is actively playing with is always wrong. If your child is not actively playing with it, however, it's fair game. If the toy is special and your child doesn't want to share it, it should stay at home. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 07:20 PM Flag
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ITA. If my child wants to touch/play with a toy on payground, they need to ask the owner if they can share. Otherwise its off limits. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 07:22 PM Flag
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Two-year-olds are too young for this, although in general I agree with this. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 07:20 PM Flag
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