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06.01.08, 17:45 PM General Topics
26 replies
potty training help -- DD is using pee accidents during the day for attention (does it while I'm nursing #2), and also yelling for the potty a million times when she should be going to sleep (even after she's been taken to the potty one or two times already). We're being manipulated here. How to correct this without derailing the potty training? I'm already trying to be "boring" when I clean up after accidents, but the truth is, she still gets more of my attention that way than she does when I breastfeed #2... [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
General Topics 06.01.08, 05:45 PM Flag
 

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she is obviously jealous of the new baby. How old is she? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 05:46 PM Flag
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yup, though less jealous than she was initially... she's 22 mo. We're training early because she's had a history of UTIs and we have to get her out of diapers for her health. She showed a lot of signs of getting it fast at first, but now we're stuck here. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 05:47 PM Flag
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She might just be too young. Did your ped really say you have to get her out of diapers so young? That sucks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 05:48 PM Flag
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np: i am the third or here. she's not ready. a lot of dd's show some signs around that age but are not truly ready until around 2.6. put her back in diapers. leave the potty as a volunteer and highly-praised option. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 05:49 PM Flag
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hmm, are you sure? she made so much progress; she can hold her pee for a long time now and she can pee when asked to, when sitting on the potty. it seems she's almost there except for the protest about her sister getting more attention. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 05:51 PM Flag
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can she poop on the potty? can she tell you when she needs to go with enough advance notice to get her to a potty? can she stay dry through naps or nighttime more times than not? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 05:53 PM Flag
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no to question number one (she did at first but then got constipated and scared). yes to question number two, as long as she's not too distracted by a social situation. question number three: yes for naps, no for nighttime. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 05:55 PM Flag
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FWIW: My DS did the same thing around teh same age and when he started getting constipated/withholding bowel movements my ped told us to stop with the training that it was too much for him (we also had a new baby). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 05:56 PM Flag
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i really just think it's too much for her. potty training is a major life transition and therefore a huge stressor. becoming a sibling is also a huge stressor. she's not manipulating you as much as she is communicating to you that she is overwhelmed. hear her. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 05:59 PM Flag
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np: You might be also making too much of the attention thing. It could just be accidents. Friends have told me that when they train earlier, it can take longer and involve more accidents. She's younger, has less control, fewer communication skills, it just might take longer. And you might be distracted too so not picking up on her signs she has to go. Asking kind of a lot her, imo. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 05:54 PM Flag
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np or: itta with this also. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 05:55 PM Flag
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well, if that's all it is, I'm happy to keep going forward and trying to make it work. I just don't want us to get entrenched in something where peeing becomes a way to get attention. it's been quite a pattern the last few days -- I nurse, she pees on the floor. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 05:58 PM Flag
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Tell her she needs to wear diapers for the time being until she has better awareness. Don't do it as punishment or meanly, just say, Honey, I htink maybe we better go back to pull-ups because you're having too many accidents. If she's motivated to potty train, that will make her clean up her act. If she's okay with the pull ups maybe you were pushing the training too much anyway and with a new db it's not a great time and try again in a month. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 05:46 PM Flag
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hmmmm. that was my mom's suggestion too but i've talked to so many other people who say never go back, it just confuses them more. not sure who to listen to, frankly. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 05:48 PM Flag
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Ask your ped. I know mine would say the worst thing you can do is push them or make it any kind of power struggle/control thing. But that's based on my kid and our family. Your ped may have different advice for you and your kid, esp if she has a medical issue. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 05:50 PM Flag
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np: i am the or below - nooooooooooooo to the pull-ups. only use them over underwear as a just in case option when necessary. they are very confusing to children, imho, and do not in fact function well as training pants. btw, when a dd is really ready, the switch from diapers to panties can take place in a short a period as a couple of days. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 05:51 PM Flag
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np: What's the diff btw pull-ups and diapers? We use pull-ups not as training pants but just b/c at 2 yo ds is too big and heavy for the changing table and easier to use pull-ups. Don't really see the diff. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 05:52 PM Flag
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if you use them over underwear, nothing. but when used by themselves, the child gets the benefit of feeling like a big boy/girl but is still wearing a diaper - so it defeats the purpose. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 05:55 PM Flag
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Oh, we haven't posed it as a big boy/girl thing. Just convenience for us. I don't think he even notices the difference. But we're not potty training. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 05:57 PM Flag
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they're totally great as a convenience, but lots of parents use them for convenience with the potty training and it can get you VERY trapped. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 06:01 PM Flag
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are you using pullups? if so, stop. panties only or put her back in diapers if you feel her regression is significant enough that she is no longer ready. and you need to get some occasional help with db if you can and spend some one on one time with dd. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 05:48 PM Flag
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we are panties only except for naps and nighttime, when we use pullups [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 05:49 PM Flag
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use them OVER underwear when you use them. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 05:53 PM Flag
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I have never heard of this pull up thing. Where did you get this? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 05:55 PM Flag
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actually first heard it on here. but it totally works to use them over underwear - and is definitely true in terms of their not being effective transitional wear (at least not effective in terms of aiding the transition). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 05:58 PM Flag
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interesting idea, thanks. (OP) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.01.08, 05:57 PM Flag
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