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05.30.08, 13:55 PM General Topics
21 replies
Vent: sick of mom at ds's school who never volunteers for anything but constantly emails the parents' listserv with complaints and suggestions of things she wants other parents to do to improve the school [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
General Topics 05.30.08, 01:55 PM Flag
 

Dear UrbanBaby community,

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maybe they're like me - chock full of good idea but have too many youngins' at home [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.30.08, 01:57 PM Flag
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we all have things we are trying to do...it's usually the people that already have full plates that take on more stuff. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.30.08, 02:15 PM Flag
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"Yeah, we talked about this last week while we were prepping for the fundraiser. You should have been there." [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.30.08, 02:01 PM Flag
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let me guess..does she work? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.30.08, 02:12 PM Flag
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ok, as a FT WOHM (also FT WOHD), I have to step in here. Yes I agree that all parents need to participate and I do. But I have a full time job and my boss, who pays me, expects me to be there to do it. I can't make myself 100%, or even 60% available or even 20% available for the stuff that the school does. Sorry, it's just the way it is. I assume if you choose and are able to SAHM, you do so you can participate more in your DC's school. If I was able, which I am not, to stay home, I would. If you don't want to do it, don't. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.30.08, 02:24 PM Flag
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then you can't bitch when certain decisions are made and you did not show up at the meeting. Sorry. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.30.08, 02:28 PM Flag
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if someone sends an e-mail or a letter or makes a call to me asking my input on something. I respond. If there is going to be a decision made about something, I expect to be told where and when so I can decide if I want to have input. And I pay the same money you do to send my child to that school, so I get to have just as much input on what goes on. Let's not forget that I pay the school to do these tings, if I wanted to spend 24/7 dealing with the education of my child I would home school him or get job at his school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.30.08, 02:30 PM Flag
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original post: "but constantly emails... complaints and suggestions of things she wants other parents to do to improve the school" [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.30.08, 02:34 PM Flag
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I get what you are saying...but I hope you are not one of those parents who selectively provides input and then complains when your input was not heeded. There are things that need input and help that you, frankly, should not opt out of. Yes, you pay your tuition/taxes, but in many ways, tuition only covers part of what it costs to keep the school running...what about the hours of volunteer time it takes to run activities, pto, etc. It is not just all fun and games. You seem a little dismissive about the value a SAHM provides to schools that YOU think you are too important or busy to attend to. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.30.08, 02:52 PM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.30.08, 02:55 PM Flag
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I think the pertinent part of OP's post was, "but constantly complain..." Do you constantly complain? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.30.08, 02:32 PM Flag
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no. but it's not in my nature to be a complainer. I took issue with her assumption that this person was WOHM and implied that becuase she worked she couldn't be bothered to be involved with the school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.30.08, 02:36 PM Flag
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but the person described works. She is a mid level employee at best. (I should add I am not OP and am completely making this up.) She thinks her company couldn't run without her even though her job is not that important. She is the kind of person who is the assistant to the Director of a Division and refers to her self as the Assistant Director. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.30.08, 02:48 PM Flag
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do you work? I am a lawyer, a cog in a wheel of a law firm. i am the first one to admit that I am completley unimportant and the legal community would go on just fine without me if I missed a day or two or 30. However, my boss doesn't see it that way or doesn't care. He expects me to be at work. My point is that it doesn't matter how important you are your job, you are expected to be there and if you don't show up...big problems. As WOHM the only guilt owrse than guilt you feel about not being htere for your kid, is the guilt you feel slacking at your job when you are being there for your kid. It's a no win situation. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.30.08, 02:53 PM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.30.08, 02:56 PM Flag
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I agree. But some of what we have to do isn't always by choice. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.30.08, 02:58 PM Flag
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10% of the parents do 90% of the work. Of the remaining 80%, 50% do something occasionally if asked and scheduled, 20% do something begrudgingly, and 10% do not a damn thing. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.30.08, 02:14 PM Flag
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I"m a roommom and all year the same 5 woman volunteered for everything..I could predict which ones will respond before email goes out...these are also the moms who are first to give $ for class gift.. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.30.08, 02:20 PM Flag
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My ds is in preschool still but I have friends with older kids (and the little that I do with the preschool is pretty much run by me and one other parent who do the bulk of the heavy lifting)...I know you are not exaggerating one iota. It's too bad that the same 5 chicks who volunteer for a lot of stuff are often maligned by the people who don't do squat. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.30.08, 02:26 PM Flag
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don't pretend for one second that these "super-moms" don't do this becuase they want to be important, and DCs school is really the only place they get to do it. In all likelyhood they are SAHM and have decided to make DC's school their "job." As a WOHM, I am grateful that they are there doing things that I am unable to do, however I also know that this same little group of women run around that school like it is their personal little fiefdom and they are its royal court. They don't want anyone butting in on what they do and they love to hoard it over you how involved they are. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.30.08, 02:35 PM Flag
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there is probably some of that but honestly, a lot of it is because NO ONE else steps up. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.30.08, 02:47 PM Flag
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