< Return to Talk
05.29.08, 15:59 PM General Topics
27 replies
ok, so, tomorrow i am telling my boss i'm not coming back to work after my mat leave ends. any suggestions? i'm terrified. [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
General Topics 05.29.08, 03:59 PM Flag
 

Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

»
Have you checked the policy to make sure they still have to pay you? Some places require you to come back for at least a certain period of time. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.29.08, 04:00 PM Flag
»
there is no formal written policy. small co. and i'm in week 10 of a 12-wk leave. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.29.08, 04:01 PM Flag
»
ah. you've already screwed them then (sorry, I did it too - but ti is screwing tehm). Just do it, get it over with and be professional. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.29.08, 04:03 PM Flag
»
how did it go over for you? what was the reaction? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.29.08, 04:09 PM Flag
»
I would be very apologetic, make it clear that you had fully intended to come back but now things have changed (even if that's not true) and express interest in maintaining a relationship with them in case things change and you'd like to come back. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.29.08, 04:03 PM Flag
»
gl. don't let your emotions take over. just be matter of fact. lots of people do this. it is fine. if your boss is a complete asshole in general, expect a bad reaction, but s/he will calm down eventually. just be professional and let them vent if that is the case [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.29.08, 04:02 PM Flag
»
yeah--that's pretty much what i'm thinking. they created a new position while i was pg that incorporated 50% of my job so i don't feel too ethically conflicted--just my catholic guilt and need to please that's nagging at me. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.29.08, 04:06 PM Flag
»
honestly, so many companies screw over women (not just tied to mat leave). it is likely the next woman to come along, they will all be like, well, remember, so and so who didn't come back, why should we be generoust, but they forget that they took out a bunch of your job responsibiliites [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.29.08, 04:10 PM Flag
»
Maybe they hired the new person b/c they figured OP wasn't coming back. It's not usually a shock -- you can pretty much tell when a women isn't coming back. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.29.08, 04:12 PM Flag
»
OP here--when i 1st told my boss i intended to come back, he was like, well maybe you'll change your mind. honestly i think he'll be relieved bc he'll be able to hire some young single girl. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.29.08, 04:16 PM Flag
»
Yeah, I told my boss I was coming back (and I did) and he told me he thought I should stay home! [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.29.08, 04:18 PM Flag
»
wow. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.29.08, 04:19 PM Flag
»
i am definitely aware of the notion that i might be screwing over the next woman. i do feel bad about that. it's such a sleazy bunch of misogynists, too. the co has been around since 97 and they just made up the mat policy last year. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.29.08, 04:14 PM Flag
»
You know you are just proving them right in their misogyny, right? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.29.08, 04:16 PM Flag
»
how so? bc i'm not coming back? i'm not going to go back just to make a point. i mean, i see where you're going but the misogyny i was referring to is more in the sleazy cheating leering at 20-yr old temps, hiring hookers camp. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.29.08, 04:22 PM Flag
»
if you think you're really going to be putting them out, then maybe offer to hire/train your replacement. there's just no good answer for this. people dont think parents "deserve" maternity leave already, so when people take it and don't come back, it just stirs the pot even more. good luck. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.29.08, 04:05 PM Flag
»
yeah--some women say, "you deserve it." which i don't agree with. but as i said above i would be going back to a diff, dumbed down version of my job so i kinda feel like we're even. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.29.08, 04:08 PM Flag
»
I don't know if you're "even" but it is what it is. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.29.08, 04:09 PM Flag
»
don't offer to help. offer to be available for questions here and there , but offering to hire/train/etc extends the relationship far beyond what is necessary [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.29.08, 04:08 PM Flag
»
rt--god point. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.29.08, 04:09 PM Flag
»
"good--" typing w one hand is hard. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.29.08, 04:10 PM Flag
»
that is ok, you can call me a god. most people do [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.29.08, 04:12 PM Flag
»
Honestly, as a "boss" myself, it is a bit relieving to have a mom w/young child leave. Sorry, just being honest. Will probably willingly replace you w/young single, childless man. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.29.08, 04:13 PM Flag
»
Actually, a man with a SAH wife and a young child is a best. They really need the job and don't want to go home! [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.29.08, 04:15 PM Flag
»
ha--too true. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.29.08, 04:18 PM Flag
»
LOL. That's true. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.29.08, 04:22 PM Flag
»
too true--though in this case prob a young woman. he loves to flirt and leer at young women who come in for interviews. ugh--it's all coming back to me now. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.29.08, 04:18 PM Flag
Refresh » New Post »
Select Category
close [X]

close [X]

Select a Category (only 1)

category
Stages
Regions