UrbanBaby

05.28.08, 17:51 PM Newborn
18 replies

Nanny starting next week. Db is almost 3 mos old, and she is my first. What advice can you give me about starting a good relationship with the nanny? [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
Newborn 05.28.08, 05:51 PM Flag

Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

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Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

be clear about what you want. take time to talk with nanny at the end of the day. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 05.28.08, 05:53 PM Flag

Ditto. Former nanny here and this is good advice. Also make sure you dh is aware of what you discussed with the nanny. I had a few run-ins with dhs who disagreed with their wives and tried to get me to do things their way. It was a mess and caused many problems. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 05.28.08, 06:26 PM Flag

Set out expectations from the beginning. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 05.28.08, 05:53 PM Flag

like what? can you give me examples? I don' [ Reply | More

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General Topics 05.28.08, 05:54 PM Flag

^^^don't want to micromanage, but I also don't want a free-for-all. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 05.28.08, 05:55 PM Flag

Like I need you to be here by this time, it's important to me that db be on a schedule, I want db to get fresh air every day, etc -- whatever is important to you. And also encourage communication and suggestions. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 05.28.08, 05:56 PM Flag

State you bigger non process goals first, asking her ideas on how to get there. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 05.28.08, 05:57 PM Flag

non-process goals? [ Reply | More

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General Topics 05.28.08, 06:00 PM Flag

Healthy eating, active day, regular sleep. Ask for her input on how to accomplish. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 05.28.08, 06:52 PM Flag

type out what you want her to do and also db's schedule and so on. i did this and updated the lists regularly for the first year. made things clear, so there was very little awkwardness. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 05.28.08, 06:01 PM Flag

things to define: vacation..how many weeks and does one have to be when you are on vacation, other days off (columbus day? Good Friday? MLK day? [ Reply | More

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General Topics 05.28.08, 06:03 PM Flag

Also set in advance things like vacations, what to do if you go out of town and don't need her -- would you pay or not, which holidays she gets, do you pay for metro card, etc etc. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 05.28.08, 06:05 PM Flag

It's a tough line between "friend" and boss, but I've found that asking about their lives and their daily "stuff" (emotional) helps set a good tone, and then when you make your needs as the "boss" clear, they are more receptive... [ Reply | More

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General Topics 05.28.08, 06:22 PM Flag

op: yes, this is what I really meant by my post. For me, this is what makes it hard to "manage" someone in various settings. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 05.28.08, 06:36 PM Flag

Don't be shy... be kind but direct, but I have found that my nannies (one for 1 year, one for 5 years) have always appreciated a big sister - younger sister type of relationship where I listened to them and treated them like a family member... [ Reply | More

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General Topics 05.28.08, 06:39 PM Flag

op: my nanny is older than I am--has grown children and grandchildren. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 05.28.08, 06:44 PM Flag

Wow... that concept hadn't occured to me ! Disregard everything I said ! [ Reply | More

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General Topics 05.28.08, 06:47 PM Flag

lots of money [ Reply | More

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General Topics 05.28.08, 06:30 PM Flag