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05.28.08, 14:43 PM General Topics
22 replies
Stay with me here, it's complicated. I have a friend who is having a party for another friend. I have reason to believe dh's affair will be at this party (she's another friend of the friends). I really like the friend who is being feted, but I really can not be in the company of this other woman, the affair. wwyd? If I don't go, I may offend the two friends. If I go, I may kill the affair. [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
General Topics 05.28.08, 02:43 PM Flag
 

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this is a joke, right? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 02:44 PM Flag
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np. why would it be. OP, I've been there. You do whatever you feel is most comfortable for you even if that means making up a case of food poisoning to explain your absence. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 02:46 PM Flag
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b/c one would think that a friend of yours wouldn't be friends with a woman who was sleeping with your husband. maybe op should ask her dh what to do? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 02:48 PM Flag
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op: lol [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 02:49 PM Flag
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I'm guessing that OP hasn't told her friends about this woman. It can be very hard and humiliating to tell people and OP may not want to share that information. Why would she ask her DH? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 02:49 PM Flag
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how close are the friends? Can you just ask them not in ivite the affair? If it were me, I wouldn't speak to her or have her at my party. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 02:45 PM Flag
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They either don't know about the affair or pretend they don't with me. I don't share this info with them, because they are friends with the other woman. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 02:49 PM Flag
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Personally if one of my friends was having an affair, I would want to know. I would probably still be her friend but would tell her in no uncertain terms that that is not cool. Sorry you have to deal with this [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 02:50 PM Flag
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have you not outed husband and affair? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 02:50 PM Flag
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op: no, and I don't plan to do it with these friends. I already feel crappy enough without encouraging people to take sides. They aren't really, really close friends. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 02:51 PM Flag
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np - is it over? does dh know that you know? sorry, it sounds like a lousy situation. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 02:58 PM Flag
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You need to go. Dh needs to tell affair she is not to attend. If she does you need to put her in her place. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 02:56 PM Flag
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op: that's actually an intriguing idea- I could tell dh to tell her to stay home or I'll out her (I have evidence) at the party! Wait, if I did that it would ruin the party, not the point. Maybe I could say I'll do it after. Maybe I'll just do it anyway. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 02:59 PM Flag
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np: Your DH is such a farking asshole. So obnoxious that he is bringing her to a common friend's party. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 03:01 PM Flag
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tell him to tell her not to go. othewise you can't be held responsible for your actions and you will likely make a huge scene. However, I wou;dn;t actually do that, just threaten to do it. If this woman has any dignity she will skip the party out of respect for you and utter fear. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 03:02 PM Flag
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Yes, make dramatic threats of what you will do to both her & DH. When time comes maintain dignity. If they go to party, excuse yourself to ladies room and go slash tires, etc., [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 03:13 PM Flag
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Is this affair still going on? or if it is over how did it end? I say go and make a huge scene. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 02:58 PM Flag
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op: yes, its still going on. And we are divorcing. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 03:00 PM Flag
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oh, i would so out her. (np) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 03:01 PM Flag
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First, I am so sorry. Second, everyone is going to find out anyway, and sounds like these are not super close friends anyway. Dont bother going, who cares what the friends think. You need better friends, who would have your back. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 03:03 PM Flag
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I amend my former advice. You should tell your friend and you should tell your friend that you want to be the bigger person but you aren't sure if you can be once you are confronted with it. She will liklely take your side and back you if you chose to impale her with a cocktail fork. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 03:04 PM Flag
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everyone most likely knows, they usually do. Go & ignore affair. You could also show up with a date. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 03:15 PM Flag
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