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05.28.08, 12:25 PM General Topics
35 replies
we were advised for medical reasons to hold of on ttc'ing for a couple of months. i don't want to use hormonal birth control. dh has nixed condoms. so that leaves us with spermicide or a sponge. dh is pushing for the pill. i think b/c it's easier for him and won't make having sex so non-spontaneous. he doesn't see taking the pill as a big deal at all. [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
General Topics 05.28.08, 12:25 PM Flag
 

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have you thought about a diaphragm or cervical cap? No hormones. The cap let's you be pretty spontaneous since it can be left in for a couple of days [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:26 PM Flag
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i don't know anything about that at all. my doctor didn't mention it. maybe b/c it's relatively a short term issue? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:28 PM Flag
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maybe. Both have to be fitted. Look it up. I just googled cervical cap for my sister (she just had #5 and is finally done!) I liked mine a lot when I had it several years ago and it worked fine. GL [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:29 PM Flag
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thanks very much. i'll look into it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:32 PM Flag
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no condoms no action [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:27 PM Flag
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they are married! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:30 PM Flag
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yes but the issue is not to conceive - condoms are still the easiest one to use, much less complicated than anything she would use. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:32 PM Flag
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yes but to threaten no action unless he uses it is a bit extrmem in a marriage. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:32 PM Flag
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For him to say he won't use condoms is a bit extreme. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:33 PM Flag
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no, its a discussion that needs to be had. i dont think hit sounded like he completely refused. Just that he preferred not to. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:35 PM Flag
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NP: he "nixed" them. to me, that means he refused outright, not tabled the discussion for later. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:38 PM Flag
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op: he said he didn't want them, i said ok. i don't know if he'd reconsider it if it bothered me that much. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:50 PM Flag
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np, So?? I couldn't use hormonal bc b/c of blood clotting disorder and my DH was fine with condoms. As he should have been. Why should a woman have to deal with hormonal birth control? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:33 PM Flag
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I was only commenting on her idea that the dw refuse to have sex if he doesnt wear one. i have o problem with condoms theoretically. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:34 PM Flag
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If they don't want to have a baby, and she doesn't want to use hormonal birth control, what method of contraception do you propose they use? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:35 PM Flag
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diaphragm, sponge, I dont know but there are other options. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:36 PM Flag
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op: i'm fine with him not using condoms. i mean, he's allowed to put have preferences too. i'm just not sure if i should reconsider the pill. or if there's another option, like the first OR suggested. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:35 PM Flag
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Sorry, but I think it's a huge deal. Why should the onus of birth control be on the woman, particularly when most birth control involves hormones? I think it's incredibly disrespectful for a man to refuse to use condoms. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:42 PM Flag
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i don't know what to say. i don't feel disrespected. I don't feel like it's a big deal. I'm just not sure how strongly i feel about hormonal bc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:45 PM Flag
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Np- I agree with you 100%. I'd be pissed. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 07:20 PM Flag
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no glove no love [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:39 PM Flag
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Hooray for condoms... I have been married with 2 kids for 12 years and I love condoms ! No mess... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 07:22 PM Flag
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that's because it is no big deal for him - he doesn't have to remember to take the pill, etc! men are so self-absorbed. then they wonder why you decide it is just easier not to have sex with them. btw, I would not take the pill if TTC soon - it takes some time to be fertile again sometimes. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:35 PM Flag
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op: that's a good point. i'm not crazy about hormonal interference at all. but i really wouldn't want to delay ttc'ing once we get the ok. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:38 PM Flag
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Marriage is sometimes about compromises. You should not go on the pill if you're soon ttc. Dh can wear a condom. It shouldn't be a big deal. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:51 PM Flag
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ITTA [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 07:21 PM Flag
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i would use spermicide, sponge and natural family planning. you won't get pg that way. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:52 PM Flag
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that's the other thing. i was wondering if we just need to use the birth control at times when i'd be ovulating. b/c then i definitely wouldn't go on the pill. although that's probably pretty risky. there are probably hundreds of women who have gotten pregnant by miscalculating ovulation. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:55 PM Flag
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how often do you have sex? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:56 PM Flag
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on average probably twice a week. some weeks more, some less. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:59 PM Flag
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get the book take charge of your fertility and start charting. it will help anyway when you decide to conceive. I would still use bc all month but this will let you know when you are most fertile and need to be cautious. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:58 PM Flag
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i looked at that book once and it's great. maybe i'll get another copy and review it. thanks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 01:13 PM Flag
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what is the medical reason for holding off on getting pg. Would it be dire if you were to get pg now? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:54 PM Flag
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my doctor is concerned that it wouldn't thrive right now. more of a danger to the pregnancy than to me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 12:59 PM Flag
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We pull out. It's worked for over 10 years for us. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.28.08, 07:22 PM Flag
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