< Return to Talk
05.26.08, 18:00 PM Special Needs
19 replies
I just got an 'on the spectrum' diagnosis for my son (3). speech delay, delayed play skills. I'm in shock, I'm angry, I feel guilty for working, for not catching it earlier, I feel helpless. But my immediate question is: he's in normal preschool and the teacher has noticed nothing beyond speech delay. he is happy though shy. would you move him to integrated preschool? I'm trying to focus on practical things, keep it together, but this is so scary [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
Special Needs 05.26.08, 06:00 PM Flag
 

Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

»
what was the exact dx? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.26.08, 06:03 PM Flag
»
its a long report but mostly developmental delay (some gross motor, some speech, some social, but mostly in symbolic play and 'performance' (ier doing the puzzel quickly.. he did it, just didn't make any effort to do it fast despite instructions). I have a hard time swallowing the test - it seemed so arbitrary. he did not meet the criteria for an autism dx, just spectrum. the OT things its all sensory/motor planning. the physio thinks much is related to jammed up part of upper spine which has limited his extension. the speech terapist says 'yes on the spectrum but these things change' .. we have no overall 'case manager' (not in US) which leaves us feeling out of our depth [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.26.08, 06:09 PM Flag
»
wow. i am in the exact same situation. WOHM mom with a 3 yo. I have no good advice for you other than i am just as lost and confused as you are. where are you? I am in Westchester. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.26.08, 06:12 PM Flag
»
I'm in asia.. we're expats. how are you doing? when did you get the dx? for us it was abt 2 wks ago. theres lots of services but you kind of have to hunt it down (and pay) on your own.. am starting with OT and ST, but also going to pursue diet and ABA. its overwhelming! I JUST went back to work 2 wks ago from 3rd maternity leave (until sunday, I had 3 under 3.. ds just turned 3). I am trying to just focus on getting him the services he needs.. how are you doing? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.26.08, 06:17 PM Flag
»
i am on a bit of a roller coaster. One moment is fine and then next i am in tears. I can't imagine doing this with 3 under 3. i have a 1 yo and the 3 yo. DH and i are basically reeling. Found out either language processing issue with potential mild PDD NOS. Learning this "new" langage and it just sucks. This is the worst thing that has ever happened to me...how are you? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.26.08, 06:36 PM Flag
»
i have recieved a bunch of hints, but someone recommended the autism speaks website. they have a first 100 days thing that someone on this board said was helpful [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.26.08, 06:38 PM Flag
»
I started to look at that - I wanted to see all the 'these are the signs' video clips but I can't do that at work and I am finding it hard to find the time at home (kids go to bed, I eat, I go to bed, I get up at 2 to feed baby and 5 to pump, leave 6:30). I am reeling to... dh is worse. we go from hopeful to practical to helpless/hopeless in minutes. we take turns being strong. I read The Out of Sync Child which was great..today after work meeting with a case manager type child psychologist and Friday meeting with an ABA therpaist who can work with him at home. I'm a wreck. I probably seem extremely together and practical on the outside. I have not even told my family or eny freinds. I have told boss (unmarried, chilldess guy) the absolute minimum . the other kids are getting NONE of me, basically nanny doing it all which makes me feel even worse [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.26.08, 06:44 PM Flag
»
sounds really similar to me. I don't know if i have the energy to "talk" to you (I am sure you are in the same boat), but here is a test email account i just set up if you want to chat. going to bed now so will follow up (if you want) sometime tomorrow. Good luck wiht the rest of your day aham350@gmail.com [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.26.08, 07:07 PM Flag
»
thanks very much.. I'll email you later today - maybe we can help eachother navigate this . sleep well [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.26.08, 07:08 PM Flag
»
my ds is 5.6yo and has been receiving ST and OT for 3 years. He only recently was dx'ed w/ ADD and mild PDD. I noticed his "issues" shortly after he turned 2 and enrolled him in a regular daycare/preschool immediately to socialize. While I will say the experience was not bad for him (very structured environment), I think the class size was perhaps not the best for him. I switched him this past year, (preK 4) to an inclusion class. That has its drawbacks as well. I would say that if you are happy with the school, don't make any rash decisions yet about switching him - unless you think his therapy needs would be better served in the special ed preschool (my ds could receive no ST or OT in his old school, we spent all our time running from billy to jack after school) [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.26.08, 06:42 PM Flag
»
op: same with us.. no services or special ed teacher at the normal school. he gets PT and ST late afternoon but at least DH can be there (his hours are better than mine, 7-3.. I'm 7-5). the inclusion school would have a special ed teacher but he'd still do st/ot outside (nearby and associated) [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.26.08, 06:52 PM Flag
»
do you like the special ed school? While I loved my ds' first preschool (cried when I told the principal that I was pulling him out), the most he gained from the place was structure. It was run by nuns, and believe me, they LOVE structure. lol. In his current school, he does have the spec. ed teacher who is able to redirect him better BUT, she's not the sharpest knife in the drawer and often the classroom is a chaotic (this is an inclusion class w/ 12 mainstream kids and 3 spec. ed). I must admit though, I don't live in the best school district, perhaps inclusion is better in other places. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.26.08, 07:02 PM Flag
»
i havent even been to see it. DH is crushed at the thought that he might not go to 'normal' school and is resisting moving to fast on this (I agree nothing too rash, just canvassing ideas) [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.26.08, 07:03 PM Flag
»
it is a grieving process. I had really convinced myself that my ds could attend a mainstream K this year. Even put down a deposit in our local parochial school. After watching him in recent evals and w/ dxes, I must admit that he is not ready. I really don't know what to do. As I said, I live in a crap district. I may homeschool him next year. As far as your dh is concerned, you have to drill into him that these are the critical years. Yes, it's just preschool, but he needs to be in an environment that will support him and won't allow him to stim by himself and separate from others. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.26.08, 07:08 PM Flag
»
are you still there? can you tell me more about your son? Mine likes to spin things and look at things that spin (fans are a real high) .. some echolalic speech. we were going to go private anyway as we are overseas [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.26.08, 08:18 PM Flag
»
I'm sorry - I know how difficult and awful a time it is. What kind of school options do you have? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.26.08, 08:09 PM Flag
»
[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.26.08, 08:49 PM Flag
»
In retrospect and since it doesn't need to be forever depending on remediation, I would at the very least move him to a smaller setting - fewer kids, more 1x1 with teachers and ideally, I guess, a SN setting so that he can get really targeted help. My 6 yr old went through mainstream pre-K and although not on the spectrum, had a rough time trying to keep up socially with the other kids. Just for his own sense of self, it might be worth it to see what options are available like this to him. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 05.27.08, 01:52 PM Flag
»
Don't feel bad for working. If it's your first dc it can be hard to recog every single sign. And all kids are different. It's great that his preschool teacher didn't notice anything beyond the speech delay. Remember. It's a big, big spectrum. Sounds like your son might be on the milder end. I'd get him the services he needs, integrated preschool or where ever is best. Good luck! [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 09.01.08, 07:10 PM Flag
Refresh » New Post »
Select Category
close [X]

close [X]

Select a Category (only 1)

category
Stages
Regions