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05.21.08, 17:42 PM Toddler
16 replies
Who is right? We're in early planning for bar mitzvah. My extended family is much larger than dh's extended family. My MIL wants to invite many more friends since "my side" has more people. I'm fine with her inviting friends that we know and know our dc, but don't want to invite FIL's poker buddies who we've never met. What do you think? [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
Toddler 05.21.08, 05:42 PM Flag
 

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thats stupid of her, whay does it have to be equal? is she paying for it? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.21.08, 05:42 PM Flag
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who's paying? if you're the host, you should determine who gets to come and who doesn't. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.21.08, 05:43 PM Flag
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We're paying, but I want to maintain good relations (generally like her). Sometimes she aggravates me so much that I can't tell who is in the right. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.21.08, 05:43 PM Flag
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i like the other poster's idea of giving mil a set number. makes sense... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.21.08, 05:44 PM Flag
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ITA. if its her affair then fine. If its YOUR affair, you draw the line. Too bad that the sides arent even. My parents sides are WAY out of wack and Gma never invited anyone! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.21.08, 05:44 PM Flag
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will his poker buddies bring good gifts? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.21.08, 05:43 PM Flag
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lol [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.21.08, 05:44 PM Flag
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give her a fixed number of people she can invite. it's your event, not hers; people ds doesn't even know, and you don't know, don't really belong imo. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.21.08, 05:44 PM Flag
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np: ITA. It's not an opportunity for your parents/in laws to invite whoever they want. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.21.08, 05:44 PM Flag
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ita. it's not your wedding...its your kid's bar mitzvah..invite YOUR friends...grandparents friends are so far removed... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.21.08, 05:46 PM Flag
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That's what I thought, but dh wasn't sure. I think only people who know dc should be invited. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.21.08, 05:47 PM Flag
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np: I'd only invite your friends and people that actually play a part in dc's life. If they don't know IL's friends other than slightly, I wouldn't invite them. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.21.08, 05:48 PM Flag
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ITA. It's not a wedding. Grandparents don't get to invite their friends. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.21.08, 05:56 PM Flag
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ditto. honestly it's just bs. it's not a wedding...it's the bar mitzvah. you're in charge. it's your kid. the grandparents had their chance w/ their kids. (yes, had a similar situation and i still get annoyed.) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.21.08, 06:06 PM Flag
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My mil would want to do the same. It's not her event to invite people to. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.21.08, 05:47 PM Flag
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I would invite the poker buddies since I can't imagine this represents more than a few people. if dh's family is so small, it would be nice. Not sure why everyone is getting so indignant about the idea. these are the people dh's parents are close to. btw, how many guests total? if many, then why not. if its a very small affair , then no. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.21.08, 06:53 PM Flag
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