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Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

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[ - ] If you didn't want to have bridesmaids/groomsmen at your wedding, was there any way you honored/acknowledged your close friends instead? I'd feel silly doing the whole bridal party photo shoot and having people match, but want them to be part of the day somehow. 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:01 AM Flag
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We each had our oldest friends sign our marriage certificate. Some people have close friends do a reading. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:03 AM Flag
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A friend of mine did a kind of hybrid- it was a formal wedding, and everyone wore long, dark dresses. Did posed pictures before and walked down the aisle, but sat down instead of standing for the ceremony. She had a bunch of related parties and events that we were invited to, but not a traditional bachelorette and showers. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:03 AM Flag
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This is kind of what I did. My bridesmaids just wore whatever black gown they wanted. They did photos, but not formal posed photos. My favorite part of the day was getting ready with them in the bridal suite, drinking mimosas and talking. For my bachelorette party, I did a “staycation weekend”- everyone was invited to everything, but people just picked and chose what they wanted to do. We did dinner and drinks Friday night, Soul Cycle and blowouts followed by brunch on Saturday morning, then dinner on dinner on Saturday, which was the one thing everyone came to. They were all invited to my shower (hosted by my mom and MIL), but none of them could make it and that was totally fine with me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 01:04 AM Flag
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We did not have a bridal party. My sister and my DH's best friend were our officiants instead. Wedding was very small so basically, if you were invited you are one of my closest friends. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:08 AM Flag
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You could have them do a reading or give a toast. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:34 AM Flag
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That’s what we did. We only had my sister and DH’s brother as our “wedding party” but invited some of our close friends to do readings in the ceremony. The toasts were just given by whoever wanted to give them. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 02:58 AM Flag
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+1 no wedding party but good friends read [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 05:07 AM Flag
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One of my brother's stood up for me and the other one walked my mom down the aisle at the beginning. No bridesmaids. I would have chosen my SIL and cousin and I asked them instead if they could help me get into my gown before the ceremony and then tie the french bustle before the reception. They happily agreed and we have wonderful photos from both moments. They got to wear whatever dresses they wanted and they didn't have to do any bachelorette stuff, which I did not want anyway. I think it was a win-win. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 01:33 AM Flag
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No bridal party. No acknowledgement. Met up w a bunch of friends For dinner the night before the wedding. My husband and I walked to the officiant together. No official first dance. Served pie and brownies instead of wedding cake. Took a taxi home. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 03:41 AM Flag
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I invited 7-8 girlfriends and my SILs (who I like!) to get ready with me in the bridal suite (or just visit for a half hour if they wanted). We had champagne flowing, cheese & fruit trays etc... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 03:51 AM Flag
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Had no bridesmaids/groomsmen. My friends gave me a toast as a group. It was really nice. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 05:28 AM Flag
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Do you really need to "honor" people on your wedding day? I go to weddings, enjoy myself, kiss the bride and groom and go home fully satisfied. I have never felt the need to be called out in any way in order to be part of the day. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 11:34 AM Flag
[ - ] My Whole Foods grocery delivery is two hours late and hasn’t even been picked up by the driver. Is anyone else experiencing this? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:38 PM Flag
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No thats never happened to me before and I’ve been ordered from them for a long time. I would definitely call customer service. At the very least they’ll give you a credit for the inconvenience. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:39 AM Flag
[ - ] can anyone suggest a nice pink rug for a shared boy/girl room, not too busy. lattice or diamond pattern? i found a few online but reviews are so mixed (quality wise). not looking to spend a fortune maybe 200 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:36 PM Flag
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Both are on board with pink? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:38 PM Flag
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thyere too young to vote lol. but everything else is blue / boy so figure the girl should have something pink lol [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:51 PM Flag
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Lorena Canals - they’re very soft and washable. You’ll thank me when one of them throws up on it (as mine have multiple times...) https://lorenacanals.com/us/washable-rug-hippy-pink [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:06 AM Flag
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I never understand why people furnish the room is such overtly childish colors or patterns. I remember when I DS was little I bought a cream color gabbeh rug that happens to have animals on it but is actually for adults. He still has it today at 12. If you buy pink you'll be buying again eventually. Why not get something netural [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:07 AM Flag
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np. I also don't get the idea that a girl must have pink and a boy must have blue. My girl hates pink. Her room is a pale robin egg's blue with accents of green and yellow. Anyway, I found good rugs at overstock.com, and their customer service is good if you get it and don't like, it's easy to send back. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:14 AM Flag
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op- normally i agree. just happens most of the room is blue and gray. i want to add color for her.. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 02:14 AM Flag
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They probably do it to bring joy to their children. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 01:28 AM Flag
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I never understand why people decorate a child’s room that looks so mature and neutral. So what if I have to repaint or buy a new rug in 7 years? Color and kid friendly designs are stimulating. Their room doesn’t have to match the rest of the house. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 01:45 AM Flag
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This! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 03:05 AM Flag
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OP- thats why im only spending like $200, not a big investment for a few years. theyll want new furniture etc anyways in as they get older [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 02:13 AM Flag
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I agreed with you with my first two kids. I brought neutrals, things that could grow with them, etc. When I had my third (and I knew he was my final) child, I said what the hell, and bought him a red car bed, with car sheets and had his room painted with a car mural. He loved his room SO much; he'd invite everyone who came into the house to see his room. It was just fun to do that for him. He's 18, just graduated from HS, and still talks about how much he loved his car room. Sometimes, it's just fun to let them be kids and have a tacky kid room. They really do grow up fast. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 03:00 AM Flag
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Love this [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 01:10 PM Flag
[ - ] DH and I will have 50/50 custody of kids. I am sad and will be missing my DCs, so what are some ideas of hobbies I could pick up to fill the times I am alone? If you had more free time, what would you do? 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:11 PM Flag
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I am sorry. Lots of people will try to spin it to you that you have "time for you", but it's painful. Try to get organized, recharge, exercise, join a reading group, date? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:18 PM Flag
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op: thank you. Those are all great ideas. I am looking forward to getting really organized. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:19 PM Flag
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I was so much more organized when dc's father used to honor his visitation. He has stopped. So I know both experiences have their pluses and minuses. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:36 PM Flag
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op: I could see that. Why did he stop? DCs dad is adamant about 50/50 but I wonder if he will eventually not take all of his time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:49 PM Flag
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His visits were 60-70% to inconvenience or hurt me. I think he finally got over trying to get over on me. Also dc turned into a tween, hates the outdoors, hates sports and is basically the opposite sort of male his father is. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:57 PM Flag
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Op: I see. I'm sorry to hear that - I hope your DC is doing okay. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:04 AM Flag
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My friends who are divorced definitely had an adjustment period. But they all adjusted quite nicely. They use their days without their kids to get errands done, doctor's appts, meet friends for dinner, sometimes go away for a weekend out of town. They also take classes, go to book club, etc. I bet you'll find plenty of stuff to fill your time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:59 PM Flag
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Also- dating! You'll eventually be glad to have the time to have your own romantic relationships. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:04 AM Flag
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op: yes, that's true. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:06 AM Flag
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op: thank you. I hope so! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:05 AM Flag
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First of all, I'm sorry. This is a loss. One way to frame it for yourself is to super-charge your parenting batteries when you're not with the kids so you can be the most relaxed, patient, well-rounded parent possible when you are with them. Secondly, I say this here all of the time but glassblowing is a great hobby. The first time I went I mentioned on the way out that I have a very high stress job that usually takes up all of my mental energy and that I was amazed that I had not had a single thought outside of glassblowing for 45 minutes straight. (The molten glass sags if it's not in constant motion and it is critical to be mindful of your own safety and everyone else's safety, all of which requires absolute concentration.) The manager said: Yeah, we get a lot of pilots, lawyers and surgeons who come here on their off days to mentally unplug. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 01:27 AM Flag
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op: very cool! Thanks! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 01:36 AM Flag
[ - ] Philadelphia moms, is the city safe? Which neighborhoods would you recommend? Exploring the opportunity of moving there. 51 and older kids in college, so I would be on my own. Any other tips greatly appreciated. Thanks 17 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:56 PM Flag
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Part of the city are unsafe, but once you are unlikely to find yourself in those areas. Look in Rittenhouse, Society Hill, Center City, Old City, Bella Vista, Queen Village. Pretty much anything below City Hall and above Washington is safe, for the most part. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:02 PM Flag
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Also Chestnut Hill [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:05 PM Flag
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Thanks. Is it fairly easy to make friends/ meet people? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:09 PM Flag
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I posted on your other thread but I went to college in Philly. It was the most welcoming, friendly place I've ever lived! Turned me from an introvert to a social butterfly. I was dumbfounded when I then moved to SF and made *zero* new friends in 3 years - I thought every city was like Philly. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:20 PM Flag
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Love this description. So true. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:23 PM Flag
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My favorite neighborhoods were Chestnut Hill, Mount Airy, Rittenhouse, and Fitler. But certainly South Philly and Society Hill and Old City have their charms. I feel it's harder to meet people if you are older than your 20s, but these days there are so many groups you can find online that do meetups, or join organizations that have people with common interests, like running, film, wine tasting, etc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 01:09 AM Flag
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100%. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 02:30 AM Flag
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I'd look at Rittenhouse Square/ Fitler Square, if you're not on a super-tight budget (and even if you are, Philadelphia will seem crazy cheap compared to NY). Some people like Old City, and it's beautiful!, or Society Hill (I'd avoid; can get crowded with young but not dangerous hordes on weekends). Art Museum/Fairmount also an option (though it's not great for public transportation or street parking). Good luck with the move! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:14 PM Flag
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My best apartment ever was on fitler square! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:22 PM Flag
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I think you mean that Old City gets full of young ppl on the weekend? Not Society Hill. I haven't lived in Philly for many years so please correct me if things have changed! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:06 AM Flag
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op- thank you so much! This is all very helpful. It sounds like a great city... I had only visited a few times. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 03:04 AM Flag
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I live in Mt Airy moved from NYC a year ago. It’s amazing. Great parks, friendly neighbors, liberal vibe. Yards. Check it out! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 01:37 AM Flag
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op- sounds great, I will. Thank you! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 03:05 AM Flag
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one last thing, do you need a doorman? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 04:00 AM Flag
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This is not really a thing in Philly except for some apartment buildings downtown, not common to have one. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 04:04 PM Flag
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op- thanks. Just so used to it that I wonder if some places are safe anyway. I realize it's more of a NYC thing... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 04:07 PM Flag
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You will probably have a house! My SIL lives in Queen Village and I would move there in a heartbeat. https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/331-Queen-St-Philadelphia-PA-19147/10180781_zpid/? for example [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 04:25 PM Flag
[ - ] West End Avenue in the mid 80s or 76th between Amsterdam and Broadway? Assuming you liked the apartments the same. 3 Kids. 16 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:47 PM Flag
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West End. No comparison. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:07 PM Flag
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+1 Riverside over Central park every time [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:07 PM Flag
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I'd go closer to the subway at 72nd [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:18 PM Flag
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I live in the mid 70s between Amsterdam and Broadway. I LOVE it. Close to everything, equidistant to both parks, beautiful neighborhood, a mix of people, so many after school activities for the kids, close to their school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:25 PM Flag
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West End Avenue is very very boring and Riverside Park has a water view but also a six-lane highway running through it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:25 PM Flag
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It’s a block away from broadway. It’s nice to be on a street with just residences, but still be super close to anything you would need (subway, kids’ activities, groceries, etc). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:45 PM Flag
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This. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 06:34 AM Flag
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76 between Amsterdam and Columbus, yes. Between Amsterdam and Columbus not a fan- too much hustle, not residential. Go WEA. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:44 AM Flag
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I used to live right near 76 - If it's that newer fancy building by the JCC than I may want that one instead of an old pre-war [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:52 AM Flag
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Unless your kids are already enrolled in schools, I'd steer clear of D3. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 01:02 AM Flag
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Broadway of course [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 01:19 AM Flag
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Both the Harrison (where we live) and the Laureate are nice modern buildings with great amenities, close to everything. We did a lot of research before buying and it was the right choice for our situation. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 02:38 AM Flag
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WEA is a lot less busy but can also be eerily dead at night. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 03:18 AM Flag
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There's nothing there. You will be walking east toward Broadway, Amsterdam and Columbus every single day. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 03:32 AM Flag
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How funny, I lived in both areas. Lived on 82nd and WEA and moved to 76th and Columbus. LOVE living on 76th and Columbus. So much closer to everything. At least when I lived on WEA I could run to essentials to get something but now it's no longer there, you have to walk to Amsterdam. WEA is far and CP better than riverside but you could do both!! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 04:04 AM Flag
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Lived on W 88th St at West End and then 75th and Columbus. Totally different vibes, more noise on Columbus too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 06:02 PM Flag
[ - ] I want to start getting into cooking. What appliances have you found to be the most helpful? Slow cooker, instapot, air fryer, toaster oven, etc.? 46 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:44 PM Flag
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Wow, I cook and only own toaster over. Use it for toast. How about kitchen aid mixer. Le cruset Dutch oven [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:49 PM Flag
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Cuisinart, Le Creuset dutch oven, stand mixer if you bake. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:59 PM Flag
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Those are my big 3 go-tos [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 02:13 AM Flag
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Ditto, except I prefer Staub over LC. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 03:59 AM Flag
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can substitute generic dutch oven if desired. I got mine from Costco and it's fine. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 05:51 PM Flag
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For me it's more about tools than appliances. Like a good set of saucepans; an enamel dutch oven like Le Creuset; a roasting pan; a cast iron skillet. These are all things I use to make dinner regularly. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:01 PM Flag
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op: I am a newbie, so I don't even know what some of those things do! I will check them out. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:04 PM Flag
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+ on cast iron. Love mine. You have to clean and season it properly. Get a cast iron brush and make sure anyone who does dishes in your household knows how to use/clean it or doesn’t touch it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 09:18 PM Flag
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That being said if they do screw it up, it’s a pain but it can be restored. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 09:19 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 11:05 PM Flag
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+1. I’ll use these tools almost every day. Also include a good pair of tongs, spatula, wooden spoon for mixing. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:41 AM Flag
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And good knives [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:43 AM Flag
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Absolutely this. You can get by with a lot of subpar equipment but you have to have good knives and somewhere to get them sharpened regularly (my hardware store does it). Also you need to learn how to use them. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 05:32 PM Flag
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I don't have any of that. The most useful have been my pots, pans, and my dutch oven. I have a stand mixer, but I bake and I don't think a novice cook needs that. Things like instapots and airfryers are the bread makers of the 2010s. If you do have a burning desire for one get it at a garage sale for $15. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:04 PM Flag
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op: Lol. Since I don't know how to cook, I guess the things I mentioned stood out to me as being easier. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:06 PM Flag
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^^forgot, good knives too [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:08 PM Flag
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This. When I first read the question I started to think about all the useful gadgets, pots, pans etc rather than appliances. Having said that, I'd recommend a good set of mixing bowls, a good vegetable peeler (Kuhl-Rikon, $7-ish on Amazon), pyrex measuring set (great for heating up hot liquids in microwave), a microplane grater, and a kitchen scale if you like to bake. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:46 PM Flag
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Thanks! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:51 PM Flag
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Yes. Ita. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:44 AM Flag
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Get two heavy duty cookie sheets for baking, broiling, and roasting veggies (mine are just basic aluminium ones from costco), a roasting pan with a small rack to elevate your roast, silicone spatulas, whisk, tongs (preferably non-scratch), old school big wooden spoons [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 01:56 AM Flag
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I'm a baker but don't even have a standing mixer, no space. But second the basic set of good pots and pans. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 03:18 AM Flag
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Tell us what kinds of things you like to eat and to cook, and how much space you have. My minimum recommendation is immersion blender, small rice maker and Dutch oven. We recently got a medium size Cuisinart food processor and I have been using it a lot for chopping and baking. You can use it for cookies, bread etc so don't get a stand mixer unless you're a hard core baker. We have a slow cooker, stand mixer, and pressure cooker but use those less frequently. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:37 PM Flag
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op: trying to cook mostly meat/poultry/fish with vegetables, rice, or other sides. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:47 PM Flag
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If you like one-pot meals or almost one-pot meals, and like to make things you don't need to watch over as much,the instapot is a good choice. For separate meat/veggies/sides, I don't use it. I once read that to make cooking as easy as possible, look for things that have longer cooking times but low maintenance (i.e. roasts, crock-pot/instapot meals, soups) or are high-maintenance with short cooking times (stir fries, grilled or broiled meats, eggs, etc) For everyday cooking, avoid things that take a lot of active work and take a long time to cook. Don't feel obliged to make these meals routinely unless you really enjoy it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 02:21 AM Flag
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A good meat thermometer is a lifesaver. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 09:21 PM Flag
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I cook a lot, and I don't think the rice maker is useful. For cooking (not baking), I'd say, immersion stick blender (cheap, takes up little space, useful); cuisinart mini prep (ditto); le creuset dutch oven and saucepan; a green pan or calphalon non-stick skillet. Whisk, wooden spoons, a small number of good knives (santoku, chef, small paring). I like my instapot but use it rarely- just related to the kind of cooking I do- it does work as both a slow cooker and a pressure cooker, and there are a lot of easy recipes, so it could be a good bet for a novice cook. I bake a lot and use both hand mixer and stand mixer a lot- but only for baking. I use my big cuisinart food processor on occasion (but usually for a big project, like grating zucchini). Same for the vitamix- it is useful for smoothies, margaritas, pureed soups, but I don't use it all that often. I don't have an air fryer or toaster oven, and don't see that I'd use them. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:10 AM Flag
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^^Oh- and I agree with the person above who listed bowls, peeler, pyrex measuring set etc- all her suggestions are right. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:11 AM Flag
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op: thanks! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:21 AM Flag
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I agree with the above posters regarding the cookware but I also love having an air fryer and make a wide range of things in it. Also, if you can swing it, and think you will make good use of it, a Vitamix blender [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:06 AM Flag
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oh yea forgot about the Vitamix! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:07 AM Flag
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I use my vegetable steamer a lot. Also recommend food processor, immersion blender. I also have a vitamix but I only use it to make smoothies. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:37 AM Flag
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+1 on immersion blender. I have Vitamix but the immersion is so easy and quick and you can blend soups and sauces right in the pot. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 03:09 AM Flag
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A great chefs knife End of story. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:44 AM Flag
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Good knives, measuring cups and spoons, one small frying pan for omelets, one bigger cast iron pan for things like searing steak, cookie sheets, a roasting pan for meats, 5.5 quart Dutch oven, blender, Instant pot. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 01:12 AM Flag
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and also wooden spoons, a couple spatulas for baking, as well as silicone turners for flipping things. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 01:13 AM Flag
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I am in to cooking and have none of those things! I love my stick blender and like having good cookware. Best $ thing is le crueset dutch oven [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 01:19 AM Flag
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I have a Dutch oven and don’t use it that often. I love my Breville toaster oven which also has air fryer option. I use vitamix daily. I do not recommend non stick pans as they will scratch and chip. Highly recommend one 10” lodge cast iron pan, 5.25 qt stainless skillet with a lid (total workhorse), 2.5 qt pot and 1.5 qt pot with lids with a spout on the side (calphalon) - use it daily for pasta and the spout eliminates the need for a strainer and really convenient. Immersion blender by Braun comes with a lot of gadgets so you won’t need a separate mini chopper. See if you end up baking breads a lot because then a mixer would be useful but otherwise no. 6qt instapot which can work as a slow cooker, pressure cooker and rice cooker. Silicone kitchen tools. Try to avoid non stick if you can. You’ll eventually have to replace them. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 02:00 AM Flag
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Ninja foodie combines air fryer and instant pot. We use the air fryer every day at least twice. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 04:24 AM Flag
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My kitchen essentials are three knives - chefs, bread and paring, a cutting board, a small and large pan, a small and large pot, mesh strainer, a baking sheet, dry & wet measuring cups & spoons, a blender or food processor, wooden & slotted spoons, whisk, tongs, spatula, vegetable peeler & can opener. That's about it for just starting out. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 11:44 AM Flag
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You need recipes first. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:59 PM Flag
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Appliances aren't helpful for learning to cook. I'm a chef and the only gadgets I own are an immersion blender and a food processor. You would be better served by working through a basic cookbook and investing in good knives and pots. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 01:13 PM Flag
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Kind of off topic, but the estimated times in the NYT recipes don't include prep work. Don't feel discouraged if you take a lot longer. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 05:54 PM Flag
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I cook a ton - The best investment I ever did was take a knife skills class - maybe you can stream one? Also - get an amazing chef, poultry/meat, and produce knife. and great pots - swear by all clad. If you bake Kitchen Aid Mixer - I also love my mini chop food processor for dicing things. I think a slow cooker is over rated as is a pressure cooker, or any fad thing - like panini press, cake pop maker, etc. A waffle iron is the only thing I can think of in terms of gadgets that I use. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 06:04 PM Flag
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np: What is the benefit of a produce knife exactly? I see that it is squared off rather than pointed. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 10:34 PM Flag
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Depends what kind of cooking you will do- Don't invest in a lot now. Just a pot, pan, knife, cutting board. I have given away many things I stopped using (pasta sheet roller, ice cream maker, a lot of bakeware) but still use the rice cooker at least three times per week. My kids love rice though. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 08:33 PM Flag
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I love my kitchen scale and use it now more than my measuring cups. You can get one for $20 on Amazon. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 09:23 PM Flag
[ - ] Anyone find themselves, like me, spending more time in their head/daydreams lately? I think my life is boring/lonely right now, and the news is all terrifying, so I prefer to fantasize about other things. Kind of pathetic maybe. 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:40 PM Flag
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hi op. Yes, I do this a lot lately. Feel very lonely. Also bummed that summer vacation has been canceled. I don't think it's pathetic, it's a way to cope. I hope we may have better times ahead. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:57 PM Flag
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Thanks for that. Agree - it's a coping mechanism. I find that I daydream very little during happy times in my life. I hope things get better soon too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:58 PM Flag
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Sounds normal enough. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 01:11 AM Flag
[ - ] People who went to summer/country houses for COVID, When are you planning on coming back? I miss my apartment, I miss the city. I know it's not going to be the same for a while but I miss it. I guess people are now going to also spend the summer and come back in Sept? 34 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:35 PM Flag
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We were away for 2 months and came back and are very happy in the city. DH has been going in to the office and our nanny is back, which helps a lot! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:39 PM Flag
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^we go to Central Park everyday and it's beautiful. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:40 PM Flag
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What do the kids do all day? Are you all in masks in the Park, etc? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:14 PM Flag
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Well they've been in school but starting next week they'll do camp 9am-12pm online and then go outside, ride bikes, play sports in the park. They happily wear masks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:16 PM Flag
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We don't have a country house and have been in our apartment this whole time. I really wish we had somewhere to be right now. It's very stressful here -- helicopters, a curfew, sirens, stores boarded up.... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:47 PM Flag
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I find it more stressful now than I did at the start of the pandemic. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:48 PM Flag
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Really- we r 3 blocks from Gracie mansion and I am still happy to be in yorkville. Still feels fine and can watch grips and stay inside for those 2 hours. Lots of families with kids still walking around in am [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:53 PM Flag
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I don't think it's that stressful - I'm in Brooklyn. had a great walk today. we're totally fine. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:19 PM Flag
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+1. I hear the helicopters, I see the protests but I am not that stressed. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 03:11 AM Flag
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I think that's your own mishigas - some of these things are really the way we perceive them. I'm not finding t stressful at all. Where were you going past 8pm? The sirens are much less than they were in the midst of those crazy covid weeks. Yes, some stores are boarded up but guess what - they are actually still open! You may be a a glass half empty person. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:34 PM Flag
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Same. I would have loved to be out of the city in April, but now we are fine. School is almost over, kids are having (masked) meet-ups with friends on scooters, grocery stores no longer seems scary. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:06 AM Flag
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np -- it really depends where you are. I also hear sirens all day and the streets are crowded. not pp's "mishegas", it is manageable but it is still stressful in a lot of areas. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 03:44 AM Flag
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It's not that way around me. I know it's happening but outside the immediate areas, you don't see or hear it. Curfew doesn't matter to me because with little kids not out at that time anyway. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:05 AM Flag
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We're in Morningside Heights, it's fine here, better than earlier in quarantine, stores are less crowded and shorter lines. Curfew is irrelevant, I'm working late every night anyway. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 01:36 AM Flag
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I agree with you. People who don't say it's stressful, IMO, are in self-preservation mode. We live in Yorkville and the anxiety is palpable. Our building implemented its own curfew today to protect the doormen. It's getting nutty [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 02:11 AM Flag
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:=( [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 04:01 AM Flag
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np -- I've been here as well, and agree it is stressful. Fine if I just stay in but going out is a whole to do, and we had a death in my building which was very sad and traumatic. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 03:41 AM Flag
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YES - I rented a lake house for July - I am counting the seconds. It could be because I teach a ton of black kids and have black colleagues - the emotions are so raw right now. I cannot escape the barrage of media and discussion because it would not be right - I am all in and may attend the teachers march tomorrow afternoon. I've heard 2 protests outside my window and folks on the street are getting riled up - the energy changed recently - I live in the high 90's on the UWS. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 09:44 PM Flag
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Yes coming back in sept. We came Memorial Day weekend to get our summer stuff. It seemed ok to us and we were happy to see that...of course that was before the rioting [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:04 PM Flag
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+1. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 04:01 AM Flag
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Phase 1 starts on Mon in NYC and during Phase 2 soon afterward we'll be allowed to go to outdoor restaurants, and the roofdeck at my apartment will open back up for grilling. Excited for that! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:13 PM Flag
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Coming back in September if school opens. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:46 AM Flag
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This [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 01:54 AM Flag
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Same otherwise January to see how the fall plays out. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 01:56 AM Flag
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+3. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 04:02 AM Flag
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Not coming back until next spring. Miss everything but I don't think NYC is a great environment for a kid right now. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 01:47 AM Flag
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i dont really get people who have left for more than the summer? are you really enrolling your kids in a new school just for 6 months? isnt that terribly disruptive? and who is to say schools wherever you are will be / stay open? maybe i am missing something we could have going to family upstate but i dont really see the point...the virus is everywhere. im not going to put my kids in some random school temporarily. obvi if youre moving permanently thats different. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 02:43 AM Flag
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I’d consider enrolling somewhere else temporarily. I think it’d be better to get the socialization and have a normal feeling life, they love our town out here, why not? Better than doing zoom school in the living room alone for months on end. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 03:12 AM Flag
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Not sure it's better. It depends on the child, their personality and their bonds with teachers and school friends. We are at a good school and think that Zoom has actually been fine. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 04:03 AM Flag
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Unless there is a miracle turn around w the virus, which I don’t think there will be, I will homeschool my kids at our second home if remote learning is not an option. I wouldn’t put them in the local school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 10:09 PM Flag
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We left on March 11 and went back for two days this week. Bad decision. Very few local restaurants were open, lots of places we're boarded up and even our local bodega was closed. We'll be back for school, whenever that happens. In the meantime I will continue to order from local shops and purveyors and buy gift cards for cafes and restaurants. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 01:18 PM Flag
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we were due to come back this weekend, but now the riots are keeping us away another month. I miss my city, but at least with covid it was relatively quiet. Now things are so loud, and our safety is more out of our control. We live too close to a gathering spot, scaffolding on our street was on fire the other night. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 09:50 PM Flag
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Nevah! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 10:07 PM Flag
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we were away since mid-March, came back mid-May for a few days to get summer clothing, plan to come back in mid-June for a week - have dr appointments. Probably will be back once or twice more before, hopefully, coming back in September if schools open. IF schools are closed and I am still working remotely - will stay at the house, we have more space here. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 11:02 PM Flag
[ - ] OMG this is frightening. And enraging...see link in comments. 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:28 PM Flag
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https://www.washingtonian.com/2020/06/04/video-captures-alleged-bethesda-assault-on-kids-putting-up-anti-racism-flyers/ [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:28 PM Flag
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Awful. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:34 PM Flag
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so terrible but good for those kids. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:36 PM Flag
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Horrific [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:04 PM Flag
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I hope they catch this guy and get him for harassment or assault. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 02:30 AM Flag
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Wow that guy is brazen. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 04:26 AM Flag
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He's been arrested! https://www.reddit.com/r/PublicFreakout/comments/gxiuay/followup_on_angry_bike_guy_who_assaulted_those/ [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.06.20, 01:12 PM Flag
[ - ] Any lawyers on? I need to write a termination or non engagement letter of sorts, to the person who I was going to co author a book with, and no longer want to work with her. We didn't sign the contract yet, but I want to have a formal letter as proof that we ended our working relationship essentially before it began. Should I write this myself or have a lawyer draft it and send it? I don't want to offend this person by having a lawyer write this, but I want to protect myself in the tightest way possible. 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:23 PM Flag
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get a lawyer to cover you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:20 PM Flag
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Would the lawyer write the letter and sign it as a lawyer representing me? Or would they write the letter as if it were coming from me and then I sign my name? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 01:48 AM Flag
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Your choice. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 02:44 AM Flag
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Ah ok, thanks. I just didn't know if she would feel offended that I didn't just send her a letter myself. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 03:09 AM Flag
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If I understand you correctly, you have an unsigned contract. Did you agree to anything else in writing with this person? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:00 AM Flag
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Yes, unsigned, and no I didn't agree to anything in writing other than emails back and forth talking about how great it will be to work together and we talked about some of the things she would do, and then she sent over the contract and it's so far from anything I would agree with, and when I questioned something in it she kind of had an attitude about it so I can already see that this won't be a good partnership. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 01:46 AM Flag
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but presumably there was a verbal contract [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 03:36 AM Flag
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Yes I guess, which is why I want this letter, just to make sure she can't later say she thought we were still working together. I'm just not sure how formal this letter needed to be on the spectrum of quick email saying no thank you to the most formal being a letter from a lawyer saying the same thing. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 03:56 AM Flag
[ - ] My kid just won a big, end-of-year academic award. I won't tell anyone but the grandparents for fear of bragging. However, when other people's kids win athletic contests, it's socially acceptable to crow. I'm not looking for an excuse to brag (really -- my kid would kill me), but why is it so different? 21 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:08 PM Flag
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Some people brag about academics. Stop trying to make this an "athletes vs. academics" fight. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:14 PM Flag
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This. My FB page is full of brags about game-winning plays, trophies, spelling bees, academic awards and achievements, school acceptances, and other accomplishments and awards. And there are some parents whose kids won amazing things and they never mentioned it. I don't think it is athletics vs. academics. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:18 PM Flag
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Interesting -- I see the sports stuff, but none of the other academic-style posts. People whose kids get into Ivies don't post about it and will barely answer direct questions. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:16 PM Flag
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Exactly. You are bragging by the way! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:34 PM Flag
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Sure, but don't think posting on an anonymous board is really bragging. . . . [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:15 PM Flag
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If my kid won something like that, I'd post to Facebook saying how proud I was. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:31 PM Flag
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This is not quite right. There are some people who post a ton of this stuff - athletics, academics - and some who post none. Very few people post graciously about their kids' achievements. I know one or two who do, but I know I can't pull it off, so I don't post about my kids' stuff. Besides, no one cares except you and the grandparents. Really. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:36 PM Flag
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I agree -- who cares? -- but it's the norm for sports parents to think that people will care! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:17 PM Flag
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You really seem itching for a fight. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:27 PM Flag
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Brag on it. Why not? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:59 PM Flag
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Because by and large the reason people push their kids into sports is to signal that they and their kids are better than you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:01 PM Flag
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Hmm. I don't know. A lot of people seem to get genuine joy about of sports. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:19 PM Flag
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I think this is more about you. The fact that you used the term 'crow' makes me think you judge people who post about their kids accomplishments. So perhaps you are less inclined to do so. Brag if you want to - no one cares. Your close friends will say congratulations.'' [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:08 PM Flag
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Yeah, I do judge people who brag about their kids' accomplisments . . . [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:18 PM Flag
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So then you are the one with the issue, not anyone else. I see people posting things all the time about academic, sports, or religious accomplishments. An achievement is an achievement. Celebrate or don't celebrate, but who cares what other people do? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 01:59 AM Flag
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I definitely made a decision not to post kid accomplishments on social media. I’m tempted to do it every single time, but where I’ve landed is I want to just be able to enjoy my kids’ accomplishments (and yes text grandparents!) without wondering if other people are rolling their eyes at my post. Just keep your enjoyment of it pure. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:13 PM Flag
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You're the one making it different. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:26 PM Flag
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Maybe it's because we have an only, but I love reading about my friends' kids' joys and successes. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 01:06 AM Flag
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I have two, and I really enjoy hearing about what kids are doing too. Soccer goal, mathlete, college acceptance--bring i on! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 02:05 AM Flag
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i think its inviting jealousy..many people would rather their kids be super smart wouldnt they? culturally we never brag about accomplishments like that so as not to invite the evil eye :) silly but cultural. if anything we downplay more than brag. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 02:45 AM Flag
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I don't think it's different, I know ppl who brag about this kind of thing as much as athletics. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 03:47 AM Flag
[ - ] families whose nannies are back - are they taking the subway yet? if not (and youre driving or some other arrangement) when do you think taking the subway will be "safe"/"acceptable" ? we are driving ours home every night...but wondering really at what point will trains be safe? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 09:50 PM Flag
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No, not yet. Mine walks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 09:52 PM Flag
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I don’t think there is any way to know when/if the subways will ever be safe re COVID. Our nanny works Tues-Thurs. We pay for a car service to take her both ways and she sleeps over Tues and Wed nights. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 12:13 AM Flag
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do you plan on doing that...like forever? (not sarcastic, really curious) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 02:46 AM Flag
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Yes, until there is a vaccine. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 08:52 AM Flag
[ - ] Need to plan for HS for my dd. Would a sensitive half Asian/half white girl fit in well into Stuy? Would she find her "tribe" there? Thank you. 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 09:30 PM Flag
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Lol. Stay is full of exactly that demographic. Assuming your dd has the grades/scores, she will find her tribe there. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 09:43 PM Flag
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I do not think Stuy is "full" of Eurasians [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:07 PM Flag
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Not quite full. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 02:45 AM Flag
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Stuy is prob 70% Asian [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:25 PM Flag
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Yes, I am aware. How does the dynamics of Asian kids interacting with White & Eurasian kids work there? Any cliques/tribes? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:30 PM Flag
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Smh [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:53 PM Flag
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? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:06 PM Flag
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Dominican Academy [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 01:14 AM Flag
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She would love SHS. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.05.20, 11:48 AM Flag
[ - ] Rum & coke or vodka and lemonade? 22 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 09:07 PM Flag
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Try Vodka, seltzer with lemon [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 09:09 PM Flag
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op: my vodka lemonade, is actually vodka, seltzer and just a spritz of lemonade. so perfect! You have convinced me! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 09:15 PM Flag
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^^and lots of squeezed lime. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 09:16 PM Flag
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Or- enjoy. Now am tempted to enjoy the same! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 09:34 PM Flag
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I like this too! Can drop a strawberry in if have one [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 10:25 PM Flag
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I like that [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 11:22 PM Flag
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Jealous. Decided yesterday to give up alcohol for awhile. No reason, just drinking too regularly during these times and not sleeping well. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 09:13 PM Flag
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+1. I was drinking 3-4 glasses of wine a night and gained 12 pounds since March and staying up way too late. I started on June 1 and feel so much better. But might still have a vodka and soda on the weekend. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.04.20, 09:20 PM Flag
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Good to know. Thank you for sharing. [ Reply | More