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09.10.19, 14:47 PM General Topics
23 replies
Dd just started HS and is having a hard time. No friends, overwhelmed...How do I help her? [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
General Topics 09.10.19, 02:47 PM Flag
 

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Op ha! I just saw MP [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.10.19, 02:47 PM Flag
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9 is different than 14 though [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.10.19, 02:49 PM Flag
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Mp was Hs [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.10.19, 02:51 PM Flag
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different from [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.10.19, 03:00 PM Flag
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Oh thank you so much!! You've restored my faith in NYers! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.10.19, 03:16 PM Flag
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de nada [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.10.19, 03:21 PM Flag
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just keep telling her it will get better very soon. encourage her to join activities. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.10.19, 02:54 PM Flag
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They don’t start until October [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.10.19, 02:55 PM Flag
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I would tell her this is a life transition, and she will have a lot of them. you can often feel lonely during life transitions because they can be hard. I would say now is a good time to work on skills to cope with these transitions. I would encourage her to think of one thing she can do each day -- a goal. indicate that other kids are struggling too. suggests thing - like asking someone if they want to go to the library or starbucks for a few minutes after school, say hi to someone who also looks lonely, talk to a teacher about an assignment. good luck. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.10.19, 02:58 PM Flag
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- just to be clear - I wouldn't push more than trying to do one a day. I'm an introvert so having a clear obtaining limited goal like this helps me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.10.19, 03:03 PM Flag
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Good suggestions. Encourage her to join clubs for activities she is likely to enjoy to meet like-minded people. On the academic front, sit down with her and review every subject: go together through the documents given the first day by teachers on expectations for the course and syllabus. See how she handles everything from an organizational standpoint. If she feels behind in any class, identify the areas lacking and make a plan on how to catch up. In other words, divide things into chunks, build on strengths and successes, address weaknesses. Having a plan of action is likely to make her feel more in control. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.10.19, 03:09 PM Flag
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My DS is in similar situation. Your advice is very helpful. Thank you! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.10.19, 03:51 PM Flag
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Same here!!! No ideas to help, but tell your daughter she is not alone!!! My dd started a school last week where she doesn't know anyone - she cries every day. It's so hard. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.10.19, 03:44 PM Flag
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So what do you do? Tell her? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.10.19, 03:48 PM Flag
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I don't have a clue what to tell her! I tell her all the logical things (it will get better, try to be friendly, you're not going to fail, everyone feels as nervous as you) but nothing works. Is your kid in NYC also? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.10.19, 03:58 PM Flag
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Yes, SHS [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.10.19, 04:01 PM Flag
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Mine is at HSAS. Yours? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.10.19, 04:04 PM Flag
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Brooklyn Tech [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.10.19, 04:16 PM Flag
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Oh well - but I will tell my dd about yours and you can do the same. They are all going through it. Its normal, but that doesnt make it easier. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.10.19, 04:17 PM Flag
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Mine at LaGuardia . Same situation day 1 and 2. Day 3 complete turn around . Hang in there ! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.10.19, 04:37 PM Flag
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NP: My dd is at HSAS (very happy so far) and is kind and always reaches out to others. I hope they meet! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.11.19, 02:56 AM Flag
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Instead of “you’re not going to fail”, I’d say “do your best and whatever the outcome, we can manage it.” Saying you’re not going to fail is dismissive of her very real anxiety. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.10.19, 05:44 PM Flag
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As much as this board can be crazy, it is enlightening. While I hope your DD finds her crowd soon, it is incredible to see how different kids have such different experiences growing up. Crying every day because you don't have friends for a week in a new school when other kids have to endure really bad bullying or complete shunning for months or years on end? Add poverty and a weak support system on top of this. Some kiddos are really at a huge disadvantage. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.10.19, 05:19 PM Flag
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