UrbanBaby

09.10.19, 03:39 AM General Topics
10 replies

Since my dad got sick and died this summer I can't stop shopping. I am not buying things I can't afford or anything but it just feels like all I want to do is shop. I'm overeating a little bit too but mostly just shopping. I'm a little worried because it's unlike me and I don't want to accumulate crap. So far it hasn't been too bad I just wonder if I should take steps to stop, or let it run its course as my coping mechanism. I did this a little after my mom died too. I also have a ton of anxiety and can't sleep. [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
General Topics 09.10.19, 03:39 AM Flag

Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

oh, I just want to reach through this computer and hug you. no matter what, just be compassionate with/to yourself. love yourself as much as you can through this and don't judge yourself too harshly. this is hard. maybe try meditating or sitting quietly with yourself in the mornings, going out for long walks? plan things in your day that don't have to do with shopping. read good books? only you know what your list is... [ Reply | More

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General Topics 09.10.19, 03:52 AM Flag

t been letting myself do pleasurable things like go on walks or read books [ Reply | More

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General Topics 09.10.19, 03:59 AM Flag

OOps UB mangled my reply. I said thank you that's good advice & i've been getting to work outs and stuff but haven't been letting myself do pleasurable things. i should try [ Reply | More

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General Topics 09.10.19, 04:00 AM Flag

yes! you need "self-care" of the highest order, and I don't mean spa days and wine and the typical stuff (although that's not necessarily bad) - I mean GRACE and space to really let yourself heal. talk to a therapist, have a good meal with a good friend, take naps, make a playlist of your favorite songs (just yesterday I made a great playlists of songs I love from the 60's and 70's... so so good! haven't stopped listening)... I keep adding to the list but like I said before, only you know what your list is. make a long one that you can draw from in times of need. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 09.10.19, 04:14 AM Flag

oh, and write! writing is a great healer. look up Julia cameron's "morning pages" [ Reply | More

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General Topics 09.10.19, 04:22 AM Flag

Be gentle to yourself. My parents both have a lot of serious health issues and I’m experiencing something similar. I know I’m spendy, so mostly I stay out of stores or use my shopping urge to order basics for my parents. I did sign up for a skincare subscription box -it’s $25/month but it distracts me from bigger purchases and satisfies the self care urge. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 09.10.19, 04:27 AM Flag

NP. I do the same. I go to the lowly Target to indulge myself. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 09.10.19, 12:11 PM Flag

It sounds like you could benefit from speaking with a therapist. Anxiety, insomnia, compulsive shopping -- it may be understandably due to grief, but that doesn't mean you don't deserve help to get to a place where you can feel better. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 09.10.19, 04:28 AM Flag

This^. There's a better way to live, OP. Therapy is a good way to take care of yourself. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 09.10.19, 12:41 PM Flag