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09.03.19, 16:05 PM General Topics
72 replies
Did anyone else get grief from their parents for the way they took DC to college this year? We - like thousands of others - traveled with DS and helped him move into his room. Met his roommates and other parents. My father seemed totally outraged by this "coddling." What makes this new societal norm so upsetting to our parents' generation? [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
General Topics 09.03.19, 04:05 PM Flag
 

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That's not a new societal norm. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 04:07 PM Flag
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Agree. My mom took me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 04:12 PM Flag
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+1. I’m 48 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 04:13 PM Flag
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same. im 49. everyones parents were there. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.04.19, 12:22 AM Flag
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Both my parents took me in 1991 (I didn't have a car and had to move my crap from Boston to DC) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 05:46 PM Flag
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Mine took me on a plane. 1991. Helped me move in. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.04.19, 12:59 AM Flag
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My parents both took me (an hour away) in 1987. This is not new. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 06:15 PM Flag
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This. My parents did this with all of their kids from 1987 to 1998. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 06:59 PM Flag
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Your father is nuts. I was not taken to college by my parents but by a relative who lived nearby. I can't remember anyone going alone so it must have been really rare, and this was in the 1990s. Sometimes people get weird in their old age and forget a lot of things. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 04:10 PM Flag
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NP. I went alone. This was 1980. I didn't want my parents bringing me but it would have been nice to have someone help carry my stuff up to the 4th floor dorm room. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 04:51 PM Flag
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I went alone. They had cute, nice, male upperclassmen lined up at the dorm to help us carry in our stuff. It was awesome [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 05:24 PM Flag
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Hahaha I went to Smith so no chance of that happening. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 05:41 PM Flag
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He is definitely starting to sound nuts. He's 80. He suddenly has surprisingly strong opinions about fairly benign topics. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 05:26 PM Flag
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np I bet they are thinking of subsequent vacations and years of schools, not fall of freshman year. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.04.19, 06:54 PM Flag
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How old is your dad? Mine's 90, I'm 55, and he help me move into my freshman dorm many years ago. And there were lots of parents doing the same thing at that time. I don't think it's a new societal norm. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 04:11 PM Flag
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She's a troll clearly. Most gradparents may be dead by now and the others probably DOGAS. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 04:14 PM Flag
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WTF is DOGAS? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 04:36 PM Flag
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Yeah you got me [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 05:06 PM Flag
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Let’s guess dead or gone ? Soon [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 05:25 PM Flag
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"Don't give a shit" maybe? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 07:05 PM Flag
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I don't know what DOGAS is, but I'm OP and not a troll. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 05:24 PM Flag
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Troll post if I ever saw one. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 04:13 PM Flag
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You mean "what makes this new societal norm so upsetting to our parents' generation"? You mean we do not all talk this way when we're alone ?!! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 04:17 PM Flag
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Yep. Never happened. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 05:17 PM Flag
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Nope, not a troll. Just a UBer at work pondering last week's events. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 05:26 PM Flag
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Fake. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 08:03 PM Flag
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Nope, not a troll. Just a UBer at work pondering last week's events. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 05:26 PM Flag
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Nope, not a troll. Just a UBer at work pondering last week's events. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 05:26 PM Flag
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Does he watch Fox News? Sounds like something they’d devote a segment to. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 04:13 PM Flag
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OMG, I love you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 05:08 PM Flag
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Exactly. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 06:16 PM Flag
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Well, fwiw, my sister (no husband) let her kid take the Peter Pan bus alone with a single small duffel. Frankly, I found that super-weird. He was the only one on his floor whose parents didn't come (state school). I think it's a nice tradition, and I gotta tell ya: if I am paying 80K a year, I want the pleasure of that particular ritual. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 04:14 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 04:18 PM Flag
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+2 I absolutely want to help DC move in when she leaves for college next year. We'll attend any parent events, help her move and explore the town a bit. We're paying a lot of money and I want to get a feel for the university and the environment. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 07:28 PM Flag
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I just want to enjoy every last minute of it because it is very, very costly, and this will be the last moment WE get anything out of it, as it is really for the kid. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 10:24 PM Flag
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It is a shame that you take your elderly parents so seriously. Be an adult. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 04:15 PM Flag
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So true. It's not that I decided we shouldn't take our son to college; I was just a little surprised by how strong his reaction was. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 05:24 PM Flag
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Just ignore. My FIL's thing lately is to make jokes about how college gave my kids liberal views. fwiw dc went to the same college that DH did, where FIL sent him, so I don't know wtf he's referring to. He gets shit news though, so who knows what goes through his mind. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 04:16 PM Flag
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OMG. I thought I was the only one whose dad does this. He's convinced that DC's are being inculcated by the "liberal elite." [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 07:24 PM Flag
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+2 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 10:24 PM Flag
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No, not at all. I continued a tradition my dad started when I left for college, six-pack in the mini-fridge. This will probably be frowned upon around here but my boys learned how to drink and keep their shit relatively together at home before we sent them off. I agree older people are weird sometimes. Congratulations, you have a college kid now! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 04:16 PM Flag
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My parents let me drink wine and beer at home, during dinners and parties, starting at 16. By the time I got to college the allure had worn off. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 05:26 PM Flag
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If I had started drinking that young, I would not have gone to college ;) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 07:09 PM Flag
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My parents did this and I drank my way through college (barely) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 08:20 PM Flag
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I love this. I would do it except I know snoopy roommates mom will look in fridge, be horrified and report my kid for having contraband. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 05:26 PM Flag
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Lots of parents do more than help unpack and meet the roommate. On my FB feed alone, lots of multiple-day stays on campus. I know campuses have events for parents (probably to assuage the ones who linger), but don't you parents have a job to get back to? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 04:33 PM Flag
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My niece had to be at college 3 days before the dorms opened for band practice. She stayed with her parents at their hotel. This is what we would do too. You can't tell the whole situation from facebook pictures. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 04:39 PM Flag
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My DC is a freshman and athletes, international students, etc., got a waiver to move in to the dorms early. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 04:42 PM Flag
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ok? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 05:11 PM Flag
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Going to guess your dc is not at the same university as my niece then. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 05:15 PM Flag
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Did you stay beyond move-in day? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 04:36 PM Flag
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Nope. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 05:25 PM Flag
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Huh? My parents would probably volunteer to come with me! I don't know anyone who *hasn't* taken their child to college and moved them in. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 04:40 PM Flag
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I'm in my 50s and my parents took me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 05:35 PM Flag
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What made you decide to go to college at this stage of life? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 05:56 PM Flag
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ILY [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 06:07 PM Flag
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It was time to launch I hope to get my own apartment. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 06:32 PM Flag
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Your father is a tool. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 05:35 PM Flag
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It's funny, my DF was giving me grief. My parents did not do this for me, but I was so happy to do this for my DS. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 05:57 PM Flag
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For undergrad my parents drove 11 miles to "move" me in, no biggie! For grad school on opposite coast my parents didn't help at all and I had no car and I did everything on my own and it wasn't super easy. It didn't occur to me that other kids would have their parents move them in for grad school bc we were all at least 21/22, I had already lived abroad and moved around a lot. But then when I saw other kids set up with TVs, mini-fridges, even decorations I was kinda bummed at how independent I had become because some babying would have been appreciated. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 06:44 PM Flag
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Hi twin! My parents dropped me off got college in 1986 but I was on my own for grad school, as were most of my classmates [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.04.19, 06:12 AM Flag
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My mom drove me to college and helped me move in. She was appalled to see that I lived on a co-ed floor. Her reaction to passing a guy in the hallway was priceless. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 07:08 PM Flag
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My parents immigrated to this country when they were 32 and 27 with a baby...they didn't take me. They figured if they could come here without speaking the language and no money, I could get myself ready to go to college. I took a bus and bought stuff in the local stores with money I had earned working during the summers. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 07:56 PM Flag
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It’s a major milestone in life, they are there for the emotional support and encouragement which we need until we die. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 08:04 PM Flag
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That would be nice, but I'm grateful that my parents didn't have the education (neither finished elementary school) or the resources (we were working poor) to support me. It never occurred to me that I couldn't get it done myself...since I was doing so since childhood. I think, to some degree, having all the resources that we don't our kids don't fail, get lost, figure it out. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 08:11 PM Flag
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I took myself (not by choice, both parents dead, had been living with a relative), and I can say I was the ONLY kid there without a parent during orientation. It was depressing as hell and people were shocked I was there by myself. You father is nuts. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 08:13 PM Flag
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My DC went to orientation by himself. It was a month or so before, overnight activity. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 09:36 PM Flag
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different, obviously [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 10:29 PM Flag
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I took myself across the country, where I had never been, not even for a visit, for college so I was absolutely going to help DC move in. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.03.19, 09:09 PM Flag
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Mine took me in 1990 and I cried when they had to leave. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.04.19, 02:21 AM Flag
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What you did seems normal but a lot of parents are way more involved than that. My dad thinks the way parents coddle their college age children is ridiculous and bad for their mental health. He may be right. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.04.19, 04:38 PM Flag
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+1000 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 09.04.19, 07:06 PM Flag
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