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07.20.08, 14:26 PM General Topics
24 replies
I know a young couple, she's 22 he's 25 that registered a Berdorf for Limgoes china that cost over $800.00 per setting, he wanted this and his family has money. WWYD? Buy them sets or give cash? [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:26 PM Flag
 

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How many sets would you buy at $800 a go - I would break off $200 worth of the charger and call it a gift. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.20.08, 02:27 PM Flag
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LOL :) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.20.08, 02:28 PM Flag
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do not do either - go to simon pierce and get them a beautiful, useful glass pitcher (can also be used as a vase) and ignore the registry all together - if his family has money, let them spend it [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.20.08, 02:37 PM Flag
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eh, its one thing to give cash but to go off the registry entirely for something so pedestrian? I see Simon Pearce and I think "regift". [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.20.08, 02:42 PM Flag
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then write a check - i'd be annoyed at the tenor of the registry itself and do this for my own satisfaction - generally i give checks [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.20.08, 02:43 PM Flag
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NP and I agree with this, it scream pretenious I'd give cash/check and leave it at that. Not sure they would appreciate the pitcher. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.20.08, 02:46 PM Flag
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There was nothing on the registry at a lower price point? They expected you to buy an ENTIRE setting? When I got married, I registered for very good china, as well--but I only expected that people would be able to buy one suacer, or one plate, etc. I also made sure there were many other items on the registry at various price points (as some people don't like to buy a plate as a wedding gift). As for giving cash/check: In some cultures, this is accepted (or even expected/preferred). In others, it is considred to be very bad taste. You should not give cash/check if the bride and grrom are from a culture where this is not done, imho. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.20.08, 02:57 PM Flag
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ditto - people bought pieces not entire place settings - same for my silver flatware [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.20.08, 02:59 PM Flag
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The people are Persian. Does that matter? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.20.08, 03:06 PM Flag
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I am sure it does. (For instance, if you are a a traditional WASP from a good family, cash is usually a no-no--esp. if you are Southern. In fact, if you are old school, you may not even have a registry at all, as it will be expected that guests will know/ask bridesmaids what your china/silver pattern is. My friends who are second generation Italian American from New Jersey, though, expect and prefer gifts of cash. Pepole are brought up with different cultural expcetations.) I wish I knew more about the traditions in Persian marriages... Do you have any other friends you can ask? Or write a new post on UB at a busy time that asks the specific question about Persian wedding gifts. I have to ask, though--they really only gave you the option of giving an entire $800 setting? My final thought is that you simply buy one plate, or saucer, etc. from BG. If you make sure you indicate to BG that you are trying to buy for the bride and groom's registry, BG should just credit the couple's registry for that amount. It is kind of like a gift card without the tackiness quotient. The more I think about it, the more I'd call BG china dept., indicate that would would like to spend $X on the couple registered there, and ask how they might help you do that. GL [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.20.08, 03:20 PM Flag
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I'm the OP and will ask his Aunt what other options there are on the registry, thank you. It threw me this was all she mentioned. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.20.08, 03:25 PM Flag
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The registry is not on-line at BG.com? Check that first ( BG will also fax you a list of otems and price points, I'm sure...) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.20.08, 03:27 PM Flag
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I'm an old-school WASP (good china, silver, etc. is standard no matter how much or little $$$ one has), but I too would be *stunned* to hear that average price point was $800. To do that would be in extremely bad taste, imho. I truly hope when you actually see the registry that it has a more balanced approach. Go to BG.com and/or cll the wedding registry/china dept. and ask them to fax you the list. GL [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.20.08, 03:31 PM Flag
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Persians are the cheapest when it comes to weddings be forewarned. They tend give cash for weddings and not very much of it. I know very wealthy Persians so its a fact. YOu can give $200 and be set. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.20.08, 04:02 PM Flag
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I registered at Scully and Scully in a very similar manner. I listed each piece of china individually (as even a saucer was over $100). I really wonder if the OP's friends only listed entire place settings. It seems to ne that she is bothered by how much the OP's china costs. Some people get their noses out of joint if the registry is not at C &B, PB, WS, etc., even if there are plenty of items available at the same price points. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.20.08, 03:10 PM Flag
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I'm the OP and not bothered by how much their china costs at all. His Aunt announced this and said he's the one that wanted it, I don't know if he's sending a message to the womans family. She's a sales clerk at Berdorf and he's in a line of Persian money. His Father and two brothers are in retail. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.20.08, 03:15 PM Flag
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Hmmm. He might be trying to send a message. Or he might just be a cluless guy who just didn't think about the fact that some of his (or her) friends might not want/be able to spend $800 per gift. He might not have even have looked at the price tag, or thought about how ther registry should be set up. He might have just slected the china pattern and told the salesclerk to take care of listing it. Who knows? I'd figure out how much you want to spend, call BG, and have them help you find an item that works. (As I said, BG might just credit the amount of your "gift" to the couple...) GL [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.20.08, 03:25 PM Flag
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at that age, they have no clue. she is hooking on for the first wives club. spend what you are comfortable spending and assume this is a starter marriage [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.20.08, 04:04 PM Flag
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I am guessing that groom's mother is behind all this. Ita w pp. Call BG, tell them what you want to spend, and it will be cr'd to the acct. $800 is totally over the top. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.20.08, 04:12 PM Flag
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spend what you would normally spend. if they don't like it, they will return it. or give them cash. during these times, no need to be dictated on what you should be giving. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.20.08, 04:32 PM Flag
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I am sure the parents' friend will get them the limoge. I would phone BG and tell the people your price point and they will work with you. Most people there have buy & hold registries anyway, so technically EVERYONE is buying them a gift card. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.20.08, 04:38 PM Flag
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does BG tell the happy couple how much each guest spent [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.20.08, 04:41 PM Flag
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i think these young kids today think that everyone should be buying them outrageously expensive gifts. their parents should have told them that their choice in tableware was ridiculous [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.20.08, 04:43 PM Flag
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can you give the sugar dish and creamer, salt and pepper shakers? Serving platter? Does anything fit your budget better than the place setting? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.20.08, 04:52 PM Flag
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