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07.17.08, 08:12 AM Toddler
26 replies
My DD is 2yo and severely allergic to dairy (not only does she have a reaction if she ingests a dairy product, but if she is touched by something with dairy in she gets huge hives everywhere). She is also allergic to peanuts and eggs, but not as bad. I would like to apply to preschool for her for next fall, but i am also a realist and know that i cannot expect schools to change their classrooms or school just to make her safe. i was also thinking that maybe to hold off for a year or two to see if her allergy ends up going away or at least becoming less severe, but then i worry that she will end up missing out on valuable social interaction with other kids. maybe there are schools that already have allergy policies in place that also include dairy free policies? any thoughts? advice? [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
Toddler 07.17.08, 08:12 AM Flag
 

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most are nut-free and my son's school never serves milk, fwiw... snack is pretzels or crackers and juice or water. birthdays are tricky b/c moms bring cupcakes but we had a nut allergy in his class this year and it was fine. everyone was very accomodating. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 08:13 AM Flag
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^^^ at 2yo they only ate snack at school, no lunch. Older kids do bring lunch and i'm not sure if they would have them not bring milk or yogurt... but i could see it working. but then again, i'm very sympathetic and feel like what's the big deal? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 08:16 AM Flag
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np: milk is such a basic part of most kids' diets, so I don't think you could tell families that they could not bring milk for lunch. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 08:18 AM Flag
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Why? Drink milk at breakfast and dinner. I just don't see what the big deal is. But like I said, I'm really sympathetic (have a brother with peanut allergy) and also I have a great eater who doesn't care what I pack for lunch... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 08:20 AM Flag
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I have a really picky eater -- it's hard enough that I can't pack PB&J for him (his usually lunch). I now pack yogurt and milk for him. Don't know what I'd do if I had both restrictions in place. I'm also sympathetic -- I had a dairy allergy growing up, but no one ever restricted other kids because of me. I just drank juice while everyone around me drank milk. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 08:23 AM Flag
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I hear you. I know it's hard for parents to deal with the restrictions. I don't think there's a right answer to this one. OP, I hope it works out for you! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 08:25 AM Flag
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try other nut butters instead of peanut butter? or are all of them off-limits? my ds loves almond butter [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 08:31 AM Flag
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all of them off limits except soy butter which my dc won't eat [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 08:57 AM Flag
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Funny because soy is a much more common allergy than either peanuts or nuts. That said, peanut allergies can be deadly [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 09:08 AM Flag
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Many schools have nut-related policies in place, but I think adding a severe dairy allergy and an egg allergy to the mix is asking the school to be prohibitively restrictive on other children and parents. Is preschool a necessary part of your pre-private school readiness efforts - or are you planning on going public? If the latter, I would definitely wait a year or so. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 08:14 AM Flag
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thanks for all the posts. i agree that schools that are nut free and then you add milk to the mix on the list of restrictions it is frustrating for the other parents - and i can't expect other parents to remember because it's not their kid. (i used to work in a kindergarten before getting certfied to teach HS social studies - so i remember how hard it was with the lunches and the peanut free table). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 08:43 AM Flag
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ITA, as someone with a vegetarian child this would really make it difficult to feed my dc [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 08:59 AM Flag
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in our preschool it's a nut free enviornment. My dd had a milk allergy too but grew out of it completely by 3yr old. The school was great in keeping milk away from her and would give her something else to drink when milk was offered [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 08:14 AM Flag
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np: sounds like this doesn't just involve milk but anything with milk in it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 08:19 AM Flag
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true..just trying to give OP our experience with allergies and school [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 08:20 AM Flag
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Most schools are use to allergies and can make accom. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 08:14 AM Flag
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I really feel for you -- my nephew has a severe milk allergies and has had to go to the hospital a couple times when he accidentally ingested products containing milk. That being said, I think you could easily find a nut-free place. However, it will be very difficult to find a dairy-free place. Dairy is all around, as you know, and it would be hard to have a school be completely dairy-free. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 08:17 AM Flag
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I think that preschool is highly overrated for kids who have involved parents. It can be fun, but it is certainly not necessary. I think that whatever decision you make will be fine. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 08:30 AM Flag
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I think in todays world they might be willing to work with you and 2yo could hopefully outgrow it a little (probably not, ugh). I would apply for school and THEN see. Does it mean the other kids can't bring milk or eggs? Also, maybe there is a time slot where they would be less likely to eat/have lunch. I'm not sure... just brainstorming. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 08:38 AM Flag
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-- Also, I guess a jewish/kosher preschool might be used to separating the milk out, but maybe they allow milk and not meat - the opposite. Even if you aren't Jewish, it prob could be fine for nursery school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 08:40 AM Flag
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i think you could skip a real preschool for 2s and maybe just try a separation class that won't involve food and then consider preschool for the 3s when maybe she's outgrown some of the allergies or has milder reactions. i think that nut-free is pretty common, but i'm not sure that you can actually force an entire class to also be dairy and egg-free for both snack and lunch. although i do think ps do a good job of making sure kids wash hands after eating, etc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 08:43 AM Flag
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most schools have allergy policies in place. my kids are older, and their preschool had no policy, since there were no kids at the time who had allergies (what we were told anyways). their ongoing school has a policy, which changed from peanut free to nut free based on the allergy of a dc who had severe allergies. schools can change their policies-if a school isn't willing to work with you, you don't want to send your dc there. please don't be insecure about this-most places are used to kids with allergies these days. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 09:02 AM Flag
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You can't expect a school to go dairy free, but you can expect that they will take special measures to ensure that dc does not eat it, or is in danger of being touched by it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 09:05 AM Flag
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they may try, but it's hard to prevent any and all contact with dairy products. My SIL has accidently given my nephew products which she had no idea contained dairy. She's really vigilient about it, but mistakes still happen. Like the person below ssaid, I would want to have confidence in the teachers to react appropriately if a reaction does occur. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 09:14 AM Flag
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I don't have any words of wisdom. My decision would be based in part on how confident I am as to how her teachers would react should she suffer a reaction. In other words, how confident am I they know how where to find and how to use an epi pen if something were to happen. Just my 2 cents. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 09:05 AM Flag
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If you are in Manhattan there is a great preschool (My Little Village on Ave A) which took excellent care of my son's friend with a severe dairy, egg, milk and peanut allergy. He never had an accident while he was there and they are very accomodating. School is only nut free. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.26.08, 08:00 PM Flag
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