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07.17.08, 07:33 AM Newborn
11 replies
WWYD? On doctors (many) recommendations, I terminated my pregnancy at 29w. It was and is horrible, but I am at peace with my decision. My child was to born in a vegetative state, probably blind and deaf to boot. No hope of any recovery. Through my priest (he does not know I terminated), was linked with a support group, who sent to me a wonderful, beautiful mom who I really can connect with. Am really, really scared to tell her what really happened for fear she will condemn me. But I feel I owe her the truth, especially given why we are together and that we have shared the most personal information and feelings. Advice? [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
Newborn 07.17.08, 07:33 AM Flag
 

Dear UrbanBaby community,

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if she is such a wonderful person she will not condemn you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 07:33 AM Flag
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np. she might based on religious principles etc [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 07:48 AM Flag
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I would keep that to myself. It's no ones business. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 07:35 AM Flag
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np. I agree. The reason you are finding each other a support is because you have both suffered a loss. The details surrounding the loss do not make those feelings less valid. It really is ok not to share all the details. I am sorry you have been through this. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 07:51 AM Flag
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how do we know this other mom suffered a loss? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 07:53 AM Flag
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np: because OP met her through a support group [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 07:54 AM Flag
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i don't know. i have always felt flattered when people trusted me enough to share their deepest secrets. however, if she lost a child as well, she may not be supportive of your decision to terminate. do you think you have a good intuition when it comes to people? i've learned that mine is not so keen. i'm sorry you've been through this and i would hate for you to lose the support of this person. but i guess if she isn't still supportive then maybe she's not who you need? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 07:50 AM Flag
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np. This is good advice [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 07:52 AM Flag
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is she catholic? i am a cradle catholic and while i have some very good friends at my church, they are not the ones i would confide in about an abortion. i realize that others may wrongly assume i would disapprove simply b/c i'm catholic but it's still not a chance i would, personally, take. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 07:52 AM Flag
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ittta. Signed Bad girl Catholic here who believes in choice, gay marriage, sex before marriage, ect [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 07:55 AM Flag
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Thanks everyone. I'm still on the fence. One moment I feel like I'm betraying us by not sharing and do in my gut feel I can share, the other I feel like maybe we need more time together before I can make a decision. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.17.08, 09:03 AM Flag
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