UrbanBaby

07.16.08, 10:28 AM General Topics
10 replies

am i wrong? inlaws babysit on sat. nites approx 2x per month. they usually spend the day, sleep over, and generally invade my home. they are very considerate and generous but I don't need them at my house constantly - mil asked last week if she could come for the day and I said that we were busy, and that I work and have been traveling and really want to spend the day with the kids, she seemed put off, but just asked again for this weekend. I CAN"T TAKE IT!!!! wwyd? [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
General Topics 07.16.08, 10:28 AM Flag

Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

I'd be f'ing happy that I had a free babysitter and my kids had grandparents who want to be involved in their lives. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 07.16.08, 10:34 AM Flag

If you don't want them spend time there, you need to pay for a different babysitter. Asking for babysitting and then not letting them spend time with the kids during the day is rude. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 07.16.08, 10:38 AM Flag

GPs who offer to help are great, but they should understand that they're supplemental and you're the primary. it's your home and your kids. if you want to spend a particular weekend without GPs around, that's completely your prerogative. just make sure to emphasize that you appreciate everything they do. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 07.16.08, 10:40 AM Flag

I think they love their grandchildren. Have you talked about this with your dh? I am really missing the problem here. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 07.16.08, 10:40 AM Flag

I'd be thrilled to have free babysitting [ Reply | More

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General Topics 07.16.08, 10:45 AM Flag

Wow. Free babysitting and you whine. Get over it or don't go out. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 07.16.08, 10:47 AM Flag

i'm confused. do you still want them to babysit at night, or are you saying you want the spend the weekend alone with the kids? If it's the latter, then I think your request is fine and legitimate. If the former, then I'd be put off too. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 07.16.08, 10:48 AM Flag

last weekend they babysat sat. nite and stayed until 2 on sunday, they initially wanted to bring other family members over sat. and have brunch with kis, i told them I had plans to take the kids to the pool on sat. and invited them to join if they wanted but was not keeping kids home for brunch. this coming weekend they are not babysitting, and are spending the following weekend at my house, but that was not enough they asked to come for the day this weekend. I think they are generous to help us, but also push the line. i think everyone on here is making me feel like an ogre, I guess I dont' need your advice, writing this out makes me feel stronly that I am in the right. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 07.16.08, 10:54 AM Flag

I think if you get dug into a place of self-righteousness about this it could be very damaging to your family as a whole. People have different boundaries and different sense of what family means. You and your dh should talk together about this and come up with some boundaries that are comfortable for both of you and then he should communicate those to your ILs. They are not trying to get in your space - they are trying to get close. It is just being experienced by you as invasive. Both points of view are valid. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 07.16.08, 10:59 AM Flag

I think you just need to stop having them babysit and invite them to visit when it is convenient to for you. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 07.16.08, 11:01 AM Flag