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07.10.08, 18:45 PM Newborn
25 replies
My 11-wk old ds is colicky and extremely fussy. Stopped napping at nine wks, which only makes him fussier. I'm trapped at home because it's ridiculous to take him out when he cries so much. I'm so miserable and think I'm getting depressed. I thought things were supposed to be getting better by now??? [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
Newborn 07.10.08, 06:45 PM Flag
 

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so sorry. every db is different, and things hit everyone at diff times. does db take a pacifier or thumb? my 2nd db took a paci, and it made things easier. if you are nursing, also take a look at your diet-some things can make db very gassy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:47 PM Flag
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Thanks for your sympathy. DS takes a paci sometimes, and it does help. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:49 PM Flag
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your dc will nap again, which will make things easier for you (or at least give you a break). i found that with both of my dc's, they would fuss a bit. with my first, I would go in and change diaper, feed, whatever at first, but then I learned that my dc just needed to settle in and wiggle, so I eventually checked but left alone. with my 2nd, I just left db alone unless really crying. maybe your dc just needs to get paci back at nap time so he sleeps longer. also, it isn't ridiculous to take your dc out when they cry and fuss. every dc fusses. my toddler had two HUGE temper tantrums today in public. with the 2nd one, I actually started to cry myself behind sunglasses it was so awful. it is hard-no one ever tells you that. get yourself out to a new moms group (or mommy and me yoga or whatever). and if you do feel like it is depression, get to a therapist-my last therapist let me take my db with me. also, if you can get help, whether it is cleaning the house or watching the db, do it. get time for yourself-makes a huge difference. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:55 PM Flag
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Yes, I cry behind sunglasses all the time! Glad to hear I'm not the only one. The problem with the paci is that ds can't hold it in at all. As soon as I let go, it falls out. Is that not normal for a baby his age? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:59 PM Flag
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totally normal. this phase will pass eventually. have you spoken to ped about colic? also, if you are bf, take a look at what you are eating. i really had to restrict my diet while bf. what I also found helped was "wearing" db. I used a sling (never liked bjorn), which was helpful and kept my hands free to do other things. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:03 PM Flag
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^^also, I don't want to imply that it is all bad. there are times when I am just "done" as a mom and need my own space. but generally, it is pretty good. today was a bad day, but the pluses far outweigh the bad days. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:05 PM Flag
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What did you restrict from your diet? I cut out the typical gassy foods, like cabbage, onions, broccoli. I haven't really talked to ped about the colic. We've been really focused on the reflux because he was having a lot of problems with it until a few weeks ago. But what could ped say about colic that would help? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:06 PM Flag
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the advice about sleeping in swing is good-elevated head helps. we also bought this thing called a snuggle nest to help my dc with colic. i am generally not a big product pusher, but it is a lseep positioner that is elevated (there are 2, one just a positioner, one an elevated positioner). it helped. i restricted same as you, also dairy, beans, lentils (not like I ate the latter that much anyways, but the time I did while bf, it was bad) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:09 PM Flag
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I'll look into the snuggle nest. Thanks for all of your info. It's nice to find a sympathetic ear. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:13 PM Flag
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hang in there and get some help. talk to your dh/so too. you aren't alone. gl to you and congrats on your db. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:14 PM Flag
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yes, this gets better as well as they get older. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:34 PM Flag
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Are you sure it's colic and not reflux? Also a book just came out on colic for helping the baby and more importantly helping the mom. A friend told me about it. The Colic Chronicles. Good luck! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:47 PM Flag
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He has reflux too, but I think that's under control. He definitely has the colicky three hours of crying per day, but he's also just fussy all day. It's pretty hard to keep him happy. I will definitely try the book! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:50 PM Flag
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My oldest ds (now 7 yrs old) was exactly as you describe. It SUCKED big time and I didn't get to enjoy anything about being a new 1st time mom. At 5 mos we tried the Ferber/cry it out method....which didn't work (and again we thought it was something wrong with us since that idiot INSISTED that it would work on any child-- which he has since retracted)...my advice is to try different methods of getting him to sleep and if you find something that works, do it...even if it means co-sleeping, or that all day naps are in the stroller. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:51 PM Flag
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Ferber didn't work for you?!? That was going to be my last resort. When did your ds finally calm down? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:54 PM Flag
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you could get lucky and have it work...definitely try it around 5 mos of age....but looking back I would have been better off letting him co-sleep, letting him nap in my arms while I watched TV...but that idiot Ferber and his "all naps and sleep should be in the crib" crap led me to believe that I was going to screw him up if I let him sleep close to me. My 2nd and 3rd dc were much better sleepers and never slept with me at all. It's so hard when you are a 1st time mom but I know now that you have to go with what you feel is right, not the 'expert' advice. I have a crazy ped who tells me at every visit to feed my dcs liver because they need the iron...I just smile and nod and say OK. LIVER?? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:19 PM Flag
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^I'd also look into ways of 'wearing' him if he likes to be held a lot...get a sling or pouch (like a kangaroo korner pouch or hotsling) or the Ergo. Try taking him for a walk in the stroller. Sometimes the noise and the motion calms them down (with mine he loved being outside in his stroller but the second I walked inside a store to browse he's start screaming again...and if he was sleeping and I brought him home he'd wake up the second we got in the elevator..but as long as I walked and walked and walked outside he was fine [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:24 PM Flag
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mine too was like this. stroller napper from below. we've got our routine now though and she is napping at home in her stoller more and more. it works for us. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:30 PM Flag
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have you tried a swing? my very colicky dd could only nap in a swing until she was 7 months. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 06:59 PM Flag
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I'm sorry. my db wasn't colicky but she cried A LOT and rarely ever napped, although she was sleeping thru the night. It did get better, although now at 10 mos she only naps in her stroller (but I really don't care). I had a hard time too. My advice is similar to others--try a sling, try a swing and/or bouncer, and definitely get out of the house!! who cares if he cries? you need to see other people and to talk to other moms. have your talked to your pedi and OB about moms' groups?? good luck to you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:28 PM Flag
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That's so hard. I had a colicky baby, then a very fussy baby. Just keep trying different things to make him comfortable. Make sure that you get some help, and wear earplugs to blunt the crying sound (don't worry, you can still hear him, it just isn't as grating on your nerves). Eventually, he will mellow out and you'll fall in love with him in a way that you never knew was possible. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:37 PM Flag
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Mine was like this too. He would nap in the stroller or the swing (sometimes). We went for long walks in the Park where it didn't matter that he screamed. Hang in there. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 07:41 PM Flag
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I'm so sorry. I know how hard that is. Db was the same way. I only got out of the house for one quick walk a day the first few months and that was after she fell asleep and I managed to get her in the stroller without waking up. I never went more than a few blocks from home in fear that she'd wake and start screaming and I'd need to run home. I was BFing and taking out milk and soy worked wonders but she's still not a great sleeper, though DH and I have gotten used to it and worked out a system. Though the first few months felt like years, if not decades, at the time, looking back, it was just a few months, so even though it seems impossible, if you can try to hang onto that thought, maybe it'll help you get through it a bit easier. Their guts definitely do mature alot the closer you get to 6months. GL! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 09:09 PM Flag
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Get the book/DVD "happiest baby on the block". it saved us. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 08.03.08, 12:41 PM Flag
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also... have you considered reflux? our baby cried ALL the time and is now on zantac and he is a new child. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 08.03.08, 12:42 PM Flag
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